Taking a Chance (15 page)

But now, Maddie found it nearly impossible to sleep. She silently cried off and on throughout the night. She wanted Austin by her side more than anything and could not believe how quickly it had all ended. Yes, keeping her wedding from him had been risky, but she did not want him worrying about her all day. Plus, deep down, Maddie knew she had been afraid to tell him, fearing he would leave. She had wanted Austin the moment she ran into him at the restaurant, but she never believed it would happen. After the first week of talking every day, she needed him in her life. But she had feared he would leave knowing she had been engaged and her wedding had been so close to happening. She feared he would not accept that she had said yes to another man. Not that any of that mattered now.

Maddie had arranged for the hairdresser and make-up artist to come to the mansion at ten, so the girls could get their hair and make-up done in Amanda’s room. Maddie had also arranged for breakfast to be sent up at eight, and she wanted to go down to her room to get ready before everyone else came over. She was hoping to see Austin when she opened the door, but deep down she knew he would be gone.

When she entered her room, she was not surprised to see the bed still made and no sign of Austin. Fresh hot tears rolled down her cheeks as she stood in the middle of the room alone. Dropping her head into her hands, she let the tears flow. Her body shook with sobs as she tried to clear as much emotion out of her system as possible. Being on the verge of tears all day was not something she wanted to deal with, so she wanted this out now. Not only did she need to be strong for Amanda, but she was also so sick of the tears and emotions ruining so many days of her life.

“Maddie?”

She wiped her eyes before turning. Molly had quietly entered the room and Maddie was grateful it wasn’t anyone else.

“What’s wrong? Is today hard?” Molly tried to sympathize.

“Yeah, today is hard. Even worse, I messed up with Austin. I hadn’t told him the whole truth about George. Travis and Steve must have said something to him when they were talking last night. He was really angry, Molly. I don’t think I’ll ever see him again.”

Maddie’s voice cracked and the tears started running again. Molly closed the distance and hugged her tightly.

“It’ll be okay. I promise.”

“I just don’t think I can take any more heartbreak, Mol. We had become so close over the last month and I had fallen hard for him. I don’t know if I can take this pain again.” She let herself go and sobbed in Molly’s arms.

• • •

T
he girls were getting the final touches on their hair and make-up. Miraculously, Maddie managed to keep Austin and the pain of his absence in the back of her mind. The best friends in the world surrounded her and that always helped.

Maddie knew Amanda was struggling without her mom at her wedding and she walked over to pull her in for a tight hug. She loosened her hold and looked down at Amanda.

“I know you wish your mom was here in person, but you know she’s with you in spirit. She’d be so happy that you found Steve. He loves you with all his heart and that makes me proud to stand here with you on this day to help give you away.”

Amanda hugged her back tight. “It means so much to me to have you here. I miss my mom, but you’re always there for me and I love you. I’m able to start the next chapter in my life today and I’m thankful to have you along the way.”

Maddie hooked Amanda’s arm in hers. “Let’s go find your dad and brother. It’s time to walk down the aisle and start that next chapter.”

They made their way downstairs to the door they would exit through and found Amanda’s father and the groomsmen in place. The afternoon had turned out to be a perfect September day in Calistoga. It was in the high seventies and the sun was shining from a near cloudless sky. A soft, slightly cool breeze made the day comfortable. The music from the string quartet was floating through the air and all the guests were seated. The grandparents and Steve’s parents had just been escorted down the aisle.

The song changed indicating it was time for the bridal party to walk down the aisle. Rachel and Molly were each walking with one of Steve’s friends. Steve did not have any siblings and Tim was his best man. Nothing was going to make today easier, but at least Maddie was happy to be escorted by Tim.

As Tim and Maddie walked out to make their way down the aisle, he turned his head to Maddie while she hooked her arm in his.

“Are you ready for this?”

Maddie forced a smile. “Ready.”

There wasn’t a dry eye at the ceremony. Amanda and Steve had written their own vows. They were so in love and their absolute happiness and emotion was contagious to everyone in attendance. The pictures after the ceremony were quick, so they could get to the party. Maddie envied the beautiful photo opportunities with the vineyards and hills as the backdrop and knew her dear friend would have the pictures of a lifetime.

As dinner ended, people made their way outside to watch Amanda and Steve’s first dance. The evening was a bit cooler but heat lamps had been set up around the garden area and patio. The bar was set up just inside the house, so people could also stay inside where they planned to keep a few of the fireplaces on unless it got too warm. White lights had been strung throughout the patio and garden area, which created enough light with the help of a few outdoor lights on the back of the mansion. It was also a clear night, allowing the full moon and stars to cast additional light.

Maddie was talking to the band members to make sure they had the correct order for the first couple of songs. Amanda was going to dance with her father for the second song and then Steve with his mom.

• • •

M
olly saw him first. She crossed the room and grabbed his arm before Maddie had a chance to see him. “Come with me,” Molly said harshly.

She pulled him into a room down the hallway and closed the door behind them. She did not want to miss Amanda’s first dance, so she planned to make the conversation quick.

“Listen, Austin, I’ve known Maddie since we were little girls and I have only seen her in this much pain three times in her life: when her father passed away, when her engagement ended and now this morning. I’m not sure why you’re back, but I can’t let you see her if you’re not sure about what you’re doing. She’s fragile right now. She’s been crushed two times in less than three months. At the first test of your relationship, you ran and that’s not the best thing for Maddie right now.”

Austin had walked to the far side of the room while she spoke. His back was to her and he waited a few moments before he turned to speak to her. Molly saw unshed tears in his eyes and it caught her off guard. She had no idea when their relationship had developed, but apparently they were both in deep.

“I’m so sorry, Molly. The last thing in the world I want to do is hurt Maddie. You have to believe me. I was upset she hadn’t been completely open with me. It made me think she was not on the same page as me. I don’t know how, but something has happened over the last month, something I don’t think either one of us can explain. She may not forgive me for leaving last night, but I’m here to beg for another chance.” His voice shook. “I promise you I will not walk away from her again.”

Molly narrowed her eyes and stared at him another beat. She took a deep breath. “I believe you. Just so you know, all she wanted was for you to not worry about her today. She wasn’t trying to be deceitful; she was just trying to be strong. Sometimes Maddie tries too hard to battle things herself. Even though she will not always admit it, she needs support, especially now. Please wait here until after Amanda’s first dance. I don’t want Maddie to miss it.”

“I’ll wait as long as I need to.”

“I will bring her to you as soon as she’s free.”

“Thank you, Molly. I appreciate what you’re doing for me.”

“I’m doing this for Maddie. I love her and I want her to be happy. I believe you are that happiness for her, so please prove me right.”

Austin nodded in response to Molly’s words.

Molly walked out and closed the door behind her. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before making her way back to the reception. As she walked down the hallway to the patio, she heard them announce Amanda and Steve for their first dance.

• • •

T
hey got through all three of the first dances and then Amanda wanted the wedding party to start the next song. After they finished the song, Molly grabbed Maddie and led her down the hallway.

Molly was moving at a fast pace. “Where are we going?”

Before Molly opened the door, she turned to Maddie.

“You’re my best friend. I love you and it’s important to me you get what you deserve. Please be open to what he has to say.”

“
He
? He who?” Maddie looked at Molly. She panicked.
What if George is here?
No one had any idea what he had done to her. “Molly, please,” she begged. “I don’t want to see George, I can’t, please don’t make me do this!” Tears quickly formed in her eyes. She anxiously reached for Molly’s hand to stop her from reaching for the doorknob.

Molly looked at her with complete surprise. “Oh my God, Maddie, I would never do that to you. Never.”

Molly opened the door and gently pushed Maddie inside. Maddie turned to Molly, but she had closed the door before she could get another word out. She turned back around to see who was in the room and on the far side she saw Austin.

Maddie felt weak with relief when she realized it was Austin in the room and not George. From across the room she could see the pain in his eyes, and even in the midst of her emotional turmoil, she took in that he was wearing a dark charcoal grey suit with a pale pink shirt. He had known she would be in a fuchsia dress and he’d worn the perfect combination to coordinate with her.

She was not ready for a battle and didn’t know if he deserved a second chance after walking out on her, but as he slowly made his way across the room her resolve began to soften. He did not reach out to hug her, or try to take her hand.

“Mad, I’m so sorry. I didn’t understand why you would hide something so important from me. I felt betrayed by you. I have thought about it since I left and I think I now understand what you needed from me. I know I was not here for you most of the day, but I’m hoping you will let me spend the rest of the evening with you. I want to be there for you. Maddie …” his voice broke, “please forgive me.”

She stood motionless with no expression on her face. Maddie was still trying to process what was happening.

“Austin, I’m not sure if we can move past this. You wouldn’t even talk to me about it last night. You shut me out and just left.” She paused to catch her breath. “I know you were angry and you had a right to be, but you left. That doesn’t work for me. I need someone who will stand by me even during the tough times.”

Austin lowered his gaze. “I know.”

“I don’t have the energy right now to argue, but I also don’t have the courage to tell you to leave forever. So, for now, I would like to enjoy the wedding and talk about everything later. Okay?”

He did not hesitate for a moment. He reached out and pulled her close wrapping his arms around her. When he finally loosened his hold for a moment, he leaned back and looked into her eyes.

“Thank you, Mad. Even if you don’t end up forgiving me, thank you for doing something I didn’t do for you last night and giving me another chance.”

As they walked down the hallway, he grabbed her hand and laced her fingers with his. He brought her hand up to his lips and gently brushed her knuckles. The touch made Maddie’s entire body heat up. She turned and smiled at him as they stepped out onto the patio with the rest of the party. She knew she would forgive him. She couldn’t imagine facing a single day without him by her side.

A
manda and Steve had said their goodbyes after the wedding. The last of the guests had made their way back to the B&B and were dragging themselves wearily to bed. Maddie said goodnight to the group and then made her way up to the front desk to check in to her room. She had cancelled Austin’s room earlier that day and there was no longer a second vacant room. She had no idea what his expectation was, but she was sure he was used to getting what he wanted with any girl. Not only was she not going to live up to that expectation, she did not want to be that person.

“They don’t have your room, so you’ll be staying with me.”

He nodded to Maddie and they made the way to her room. He carried both of their suitcases up the two flights of stairs. When they walked in the room, Maddie turned the heat up and one of the fireplaces on.

“I’m going to change.”

She grabbed yoga pants and a T-shirt and went into the bathroom. After she changed, she took out her contacts and put on her glasses. She pulled all of the bobby pins out and let her strawberry blonde curls fall down her back. She took a deep breath before she walked out into the main room. She needed to get her thoughts out quickly. She trusted Austin, but she wanted everything on the table.

He had also changed and was on the far side of the room, which made her a bit more confident.

“Austin, I’m sure you’re used to girls throwing themselves at you, but I need you to know I’m not one of those girls.”

“You aren’t like any other girl I’ve ever known. I don’t want you to be like anyone else.”

“I’m not just talking about being different. I’m not going to sleep with you tonight. I’m sure that’s not what you’re used to, but I can’t just do it because you’re a rock star and can literally have anyone else you want.”

He strode across the room and as he lifted his hands to put his arms around her, Maddie instinctively flinched and stepped back. He stopped in his tracks and dropped his hands to his side.

“Maddie, why do you keep doing that?”

She dropped her head. She couldn’t bear to make eye contact with him, so she kept her eyes fixed to the floor.
Why do I have to revert to my past?
She still wasn’t sure how much she should tell him. The possibility of him leaving if she told too much was her biggest fear. No one wanted someone damaged and in reality, she was so much more.