“Well, that was unexpected.”
Finn reached down around his ankles, fishing for his jeans. Catching them by the waistband, he pulled them up. I watched, a little disappointed, as his manhood disappeared underneath the denim.
“I told you this looked like a good place to stop and eat.” He gave me one of his impish grins.
I rolled my eyes. “You are nothing but trouble, sir.”
His grin just widened as he held open the bathroom door for me. “What do you say we get out of here and find a nice comfy hotel for the night?”
“One with more than one star and a working toilet?”
“And little to no mice,” he added.
I clutched my chest. “Be still my beating heart. You sure know how to woo a man.”
Returning to the diner, I began to feel a little sheepish. I couldn’t believe we had just done what we had, in a public restroom no less. Finn grabbed ahold of my hand and pulled me toward the door.
Tanya stepped out from behind the counter. “Hey! Don’t you boys want your pie?” she asked, pointing to our vacated table where a lonely slice of pie sat in a melting pool of vanilla ice cream.
“No thanks!” Finn said, dropping a wad of cash by the cash register as we ran for the door. “That should cover the bill!” he called back. We bolted across the parking lot like a pair of jackrabbits, exhilarated by our tryst.
“I’ll drive!” Finn exclaimed as he slid awkwardly across the hood of our car like it was the General Lee.
“Fine, shotgun!” I called back, sliding far more gracefully into the passenger side.
We sat in our old Chevy and looked at each other in silence. Maybe this road trip wouldn’t be so bad after all. I leaned in to plant a kiss on Finn. Just before our lips met he let out a loud, cheeseburger-scented burp.
“Mmm. Just as tasty the second time around!” He licked his lips to illustrate.
I sat back in my seat. Then again, there was still another thousand miles to go. At least there were plenty of diners between here and California.
NEVER TOO LATE
Oleander Plume
I
was at the mall again, using my gold card to drown my sorrows. So far, I had purchased a cashmere sweater, a pair of sinfully tight jeans and some skimpy red underwear. While I was heading out to my car, a shop that offered ear piercing caught my eye. I tugged my earlobe as I peered in the window. Tony had always wanted me to get it pierced, but I refused out of fear. As I stood there, a fantasy grew in my head. I would waltz in the door, earlobe sparkling. Tony would swoon, then carry me off to bed and pound me into the mattress. Deep down, I knew there was zero chance of that happening, but I went inside anyway. I perused the selection of earrings while a preteen girl with pigtails stared at me.
“You’re getting an earring?” Her mother turned to glare at me.
“Maybe.”
“You’re a boy.”
“Yes, but I’m a pirate. All pirates have earrings.”
“A pirate? Cool!” Big eyes from Pigtails, another glare from Mommy.
The teenager behind the counter had a name tag that said B
RITNI
. She chomped her gum with a bored expression on her face.
“Which ear?”
“Does it matter?” She shrugged. “How about the left one?”
Britni made a dot on my earlobe with a purple pen, then handed me a small mirror.
“Is this position okay?”
I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and cringed. Forty-year-old man in a store targeted for little girls, no wonder Mommy gave me the stink eye. All at once the fine lines around my eyes became apparent, along with a few gray hairs. I wondered if the mall had a Botox kiosk.
“It’s fine.” I passed her back the mirror. “How bad is this going to hurt?”
“Really bad, but just for a second.”
“Thank you for your honesty. Go ahead, puncture me.”
A few seconds later, I had a six-carat cubic zirconia glittering on my earlobe. Britni smiled for the first time.
“It looks really good on you.”
As much as I enjoyed her compliment, it made me melancholy, since I hadn’t gotten one from Tony in months.
When I arrived home, he was still at the office, no surprise there. Lately, all he did was work. It was like I was living with a ghost. While I waited for him, I took a shower, put on my new undies and nothing else. Finally, at 7:30, he stomped in. He gave me a nod as he tossed his briefcase on the bed and loosened his tie.
“Baby, you’re home!” I tried to wrap myself around him but he nudged me away.
“I need to take a quick shower, I have a conference call from Japan in thirty minutes.”
“Notice anything different about me?” I tossed my hair back.
“You’re in your underwear. Put some pants on.”
“Want some help in the shower?” I said to Tony’s back while he headed for the bathroom.
“Not tonight.”
“You said that yesterday.”
The door closed and the conversation was over. I crawled into bed with a pint of Häagen-Dazs and a spoon, feeling defeated.
“Oh, rocky road, you never let me down.”
I kissed the ice-cream carton, then proceeded to devour the contents. It hadn’t always been like this. Tony and I had lived together for fifteen years. In the beginning, we were blissfully happy, spending every spare minute together, usually naked. Everything was wonderful until about five years ago. That’s about the time his small company took off and became the monster that it now was, gobbling up each spare minute of Tony’s life. I was not even sure what he did; all I knew was that he made a ton of money, most of which he spent on me. I can’t lie, I love having expensive things, but I’d give it all up for one hour alone with him.
I finished my ice cream about the same time he finished his call. He came to bed, tense and moody.
“Are you done for the night?”
“No. I’m going to rest for ten minutes, then I have some paperwork to take care of.”
“Maybe you should hire another assistant.” Tony gave me the “You’re a dumb ass” look. I hate that look. “So, ten minutes, I can think of a lot of things we could do in ten minutes.”
“Not now, Braiden.”
“It would relax you.” I tugged at the waistband of his sweatpants, longing for a taste of him, no matter how brief. He pushed my hand away.
“Please don’t, I’ll want to sleep after that.”
I pushed his hair out of his eyes. “What would you like to do?”
He slid down until he was flat on his back. “I want to rest for ten minutes.” His dark eyes closed. “In silence.”
“Fine. I’ll make myself scarce.”
I grabbed the empty ice-cream container and headed downstairs to the kitchen, still clad in only my underwear. I caught a glimpse of myself in one of the French doors, and wondered why he didn’t want to touch me anymore. Sure, I was forty, but I kept in shape. I worked a full-time job and paid my share of the expenses. That’s when the horrible thought hit me. Tony must be cheating. My body turned to cold lead and possible suspects came to mind. Jeffrey, his personal assistant, fresh out of college and blond. Tony liked blonds. Or, maybe he was seeing Richard, his second in command. Richard had an ass you could spend all day nibbling on.
I dashed back upstairs, intent on confronting him, but he was sound asleep. I stretched out beside him and played with his dark curls. He had a few gray hairs, too, but wore them better than me. Tony was one of those guys who only grows sexier with age. I traced his lips, so full and dark against his bronzed skin, and tried to remember the last time he’d kissed me. I certainly couldn’t remember the last time we’d fucked. Sure, I gave Tony a blow job now and again, but I had to beg first. It took him forever to shoot his load, and when I was finished, my lips were swollen and my tonsils felt bruised. But I always savored the taste of him afterward, while I lay there in the dark, pressed up against his warm body.
I could have been the one to stray; I had plenty of offers, but I loved him too much, so I stayed faithful. Unless you count Big Red, the vibrator I’ve had since college. When Tony was away and I couldn’t take the emptiness, Big Red was there to fill me up, for a little while anyway. Sometimes, I would pretend it was Tony’s cock, fucking me the way he used to, with his sexy growl humming against my ear.
Another week went by. This time, I got a new haircut. I’d worn my hair shoulder length since college, and now I finally lopped it all off. My hairdresser cut it extremely short in the back, but left it long in the front, swept forward into my eyes. He said it made me look sexy, and ten years younger. It also showed off my new earring.
I couldn’t wait for Tony to get home from work; I was sure my new look would get his attention. I met him at the door and waited for him to notice.
“Hey, babe, I have to take a shower and pack. I have a flight to Chicago in two hours.”
He brushed past me and headed upstairs. I skulked into the kitchen and ate a carton of rocky road, right over the sink. And I cried. I was still eating it when he came back downstairs. He stood in the kitchen and stared at me, as if about to say something when a car honked outside.
“There’s my limo. You okay?”
“Sure, I’m fucking peachy.”
“See you on Sunday.”
“Yeah. Sunday.”
Fueled by sugar, I ransacked his office, searching for clues of his infidelity, but came up empty. Undaunted, I thumbed through his desk calendar and found out where he was staying, then booked a flight of my own. I cried as I packed a bag, wondering what I would do if I really caught him with another man.
I was tied up in knots for the entire flight, my stomach cramping over what I might find. The trip seemed to take forever, but I finally arrived at his hotel room around 9:30 p.m. He was surprised to see me, and pretty annoyed.
“What are you doing here?” Tony’s face was flushed and his tie was askew.
“I missed you. Can’t I at least come in for a while?”
His suite was large and tastefully decorated. A small glass of whiskey sat on the coffee table untouched. The bed looked like an office supply store had thrown up all over it.
“I’m expecting a conference call in about five minutes. Maybe you can sit over there and watch TV or something.”
“And stay out of the way?”
“Sure.”
The fact that he wasn’t overjoyed to see me broke my heart, but at least he was alone. I halfheartedly watched a movie in the living area while Tony sprawled out on the bed, up to his eyeballs in business transactions. I could hear the tension in his voice amidst the frantic shuffling of papers and clicking of keystrokes. When he finished his call, I picked up the glass of whiskey and offered it to him.
“Thanks.” He knocked it back in one swallow.
“Better?”
“Not really.”
I traced his crotch with one finger. “I could take some of your tension away.”
“Not now, Braiden.”
“Later?”
“See this stack? I have to read this entire file tonight, for a meeting I have tomorrow afternoon. I’ll probably be up until two as it is. In case you haven’t noticed, I don’t have time for any fun and games.”
His phone rang again, and he scowled when he glanced at the screen. I slunk back into the living room while he took the call. While I listened in, it all became clear. Tony was miserable, but not because of me. His job was killing him.
“Listen, Robert, I told you on Wednesday, the company is not for sale. Yeah, well, you would sound stressed, too, if you were me. Sure. Right. Look, I have to go. Bye.” Tony groaned and tossed the phone aside.
“Someone wants to buy you out?”
“Robert Langford offered me four million.”
I sat on the bed. “Why didn’t you take it?”
“Why would you want me to?” He looked stunned.
“Tell me something, are you happy?”
“Sure, I’m happy. How can you ask such a ridiculous question?” His phone rang again and I shoved it under a pillow. “What are you doing?”
“I want your full attention for five minutes. Can you give me five minutes?”
He glared at me while he nodded and held up five fingers. When I spoke, the tears started, no matter how hard I tried to blink them back.
“I can tell you’re miserable. Why not sell the business? You would be free.”
“I can’t sell, what would we do for money?”
“Are you fucking kidding me? You couldn’t live for the rest of your life on four million? Besides, I still work you know. The ad agency pays pretty well.”
“I could live on four million, but I don’t think you could.”
“What?”
“I know how you like to live. That’s why I do all this, to keep you happy.”
“You think I’m some shallow gold digger?”
He stood up and grabbed the bottle of whiskey. “For fuck sake, Braiden, you go through money like it’s water. Parties, clothes, Italian shoes. You can’t tell me that shit doesn’t make you happy.” He tipped more liquor into his glass. “Ask yourself a question, could you give that up?”
“Yes.”
“Yes?”
“I can’t lie, being rich is fun, But not at the expense of our relationship. Do you even love me anymore?”
“Of course I love you, more than anything.”
“When was the last time we made love? Can you remember? How long has it been since we kissed, or snuggled in front of the TV?”
“Jesus, Braiden, snuggle? Kiss? I barely have time to breathe.” Both phones rang at the same time. “Fuck! You know, I don’t even know who I am anymore. It’s like I’m not even me; I am the company, or a robot. I don’t remember when we kissed, or had sex, or even smiled at each other.” He gestured toward the mess on the bed. “This is all I know, it’s my life. Right here, Braiden, this is my whole fucking life.”
He sank to the floor and began to sob. I crouched down and put my arms around him.
“Sell it.”
“I wish I could, I can’t take it anymore. There’s a hole in my stomach the size of Texas, and I miss you, baby, I miss you so much.”
“Tony, I love you, more than anything. I could live in a cave with you, as long as we’re happy, none of the material things matter. Remember when we first met? I was a starving artist and you had just graduated college? All we had in our cabinets were cans of soup, the cheap kind. But we were so happy.”