“You got a C on your math quiz. I consider that good, since it’s an improvement. Next time you’ll get a B, right?”
“Right. But this is even better.”
“Really? Then I can hardly wait to hear about it.”
An endearing expression appeared on her pixie face. “Royce Beck walked me to my fifth-period class.”
“Royce... I’ve heard that name before.”
“Because he came to my birthday party last year.”
“I hope his dad wasn’t an SLD investor.”
Alexa winced but laughed. “So do I! I don’t think he was. At least, Royce didn’t act mad, like everyone else.”
“Sounds as if this boy is somehow special to you.”
There was a slight pause as well as another blush.
Despite enjoying this time with Alexa, and the relief of seeing her daughter slowly returning to her former spirits, Sophia was
so
tired. Sleep seemed to be washing up around her ankles like a warm surf, pulling at her. But she didn’t want to fade out on Alexa, so she fought the heaviness of her eyelids. “Well, if he has
any
taste, he’ll like you back.”
“Maybe not.” Her smile grew pensive. “He might choose Babette now that...now that everyone thinks
she’s
so hot.”
That gave Sophia a shot of energy. “Don’t tell me she likes him, too!”
“She
always
likes the same boys I do,” Alexa said with a grimace.
That meant her daughter was still setting the standards. “Did she see him walk you to class?”
“Yes. She walked past us on the way.”
“I doubt that’ll help your friendship.”
Alexa rolled her eyes. “What friendship?”
Feeling her exhaustion return, Sophia covered a yawn. “Where do you think we should move?”
“What about Los Angeles?”
“You want to live in a bustling city?”
She pursed her lips, considering. “It would be close to Disneyland.”
Sophia smiled. They could use a trip to “the happiest place on earth.” She took Lex’s hand for a moment. “That’s a plus, but L.A. is such a big place. Feels to me as if we might get lost.”
“But doesn’t getting lost sound kind of nice? At least no one would know Dad or what he did.”
“True. That’s a definite benefit. And there’d have to be more job opportunities....”
“Do you like the job you have now?”
Surprisingly, Sophia did. Although she missed the massages and spa treatments of her former life, the sense of accomplishment she got when she looked around Ted’s house more than made up for the lack of pampering. She just didn’t like feeling so indebted to Ted, hated that they couldn’t be on an equal footing. And it had cost her Eve. Tonight was proof. She’d thought maybe Eve would come to the guesthouse and tell her she’d enjoyed dinner, at least acknowledge her proximity. She would’ve liked to know that Eve didn’t resent her presence on Ted’s property. But Sophia talked with Alexa for another hour before they went to bed, and there was no knock or call.
It’s okay,
she told herself.
She can’t be glad I’m here. What woman would be?
Why’d you sleep with Skip?
The disgust in Ted’s words chafed even in retrospect.
He
couldn’t be glad she was here, either.
The wine cellar and the bottles of liquor he stored there came to mind. Alexa was in her own bed; they were in a safe place. Surely, she could have a drink
now.
She’d been so immersed in her troubles that she’d scarcely thought about booze for days. But the memory of the smooth burn of whiskey as it went down and the rush of euphoria that came after suddenly grabbed hold of her and nearly dragged her to the door.
One drink. She was alone, didn’t need to drive, didn’t need to answer to Skip, didn’t need to do anything for her daughter.
It couldn’t hurt to have a drink occasionally. Lots of people did that and it caused them no problems.
She got up and started down the stairs. She could cross the backyard, slip into the kitchen and sneak out a bottle in a matter of minutes. Ted and Eve would never be the wiser. She’d pay for it out of her first paycheck. She wasn’t a thief like her husband had been.
But the memory of Skip’s words brought her to a halt before she could even get out of the guesthouse.
You’re nothing but a lazy drunk
.
“No, Skip, I’m a lot more than that,” she whispered.
Talk was cheap, however. She had to prove it.
Even though her mouth was dry and her head ached—for some odd reason she felt as though she was going through withdrawal all over again—she went back to bed and forced herself to lie there.
She’d been so exhausted just minutes before. But the alcohol in Ted’s cellar seemed to be calling out to her:
I’m right here. Come and get me!
Why wouldn’t the temptation release her so she could sleep?
You can do it. Stay put. You’re building a new life, brick by brick. Having a drink will only set you back.
She needed to join AA, she decided. Skip wouldn’t have allowed it if he were alive. He would’ve been too afraid someone would find out—or recognize her at the meeting. She certainly didn’t need to give the people of Whiskey Creek any more reason to malign her. But wasn’t what she turned out to be more important than what she used to be?
22
S
ophia must’ve slept because the next time she was conscious of being awake it was three hours later—nearly midnight. She had to go to the bathroom so she peered out her window as she passed by and noticed that the lights were off at the main house. Eve had either gone home. Or she was staying over.
The thought of her staying over made Sophia crave a drink again. Somehow, for the past week or so, she’d been able to push her addiction into the background. But now that her other problems had receded just a little, her love affair with alcohol was shoving its way to the forefront.
Couldn’t she have a single night of peace?
When she returned to bed, she tried to fall back asleep, but she kept imagining Ted with Eve.
“Whatever fulfills him,” she murmured. He was with the right person; Eve had so much more to offer him. She wasn’t down-and-out. She didn’t have a drinking problem. And she’d never hurt him in the past, so they had nothing to overcome. Sophia didn’t want to be like a drowning person flailing around, dragging under everyone who was trying to help.
That image brought home the reality of her situation. But it didn’t bring the oblivion she desperately needed. She kept tossing and turning, wrestling with her envy.
At last, she got up, put on her swimsuit, grabbed a towel and went out to the Jacuzzi. She thought the hot water might help her relax.
It was doing just that—until she heard a door open and close and two sets of footsteps cross the deck. She tensed. With the lights off, she’d assumed Ted and Eve were in for the night!
What was she going to do? She didn’t want them to catch her in the hot tub. She doubted Ted would care if she used it, but it would be horribly awkward to interrupt his private time with Eve.
Because he and Eve were talking, she hoped they couldn’t hear the splash of the water as she scrambled out. Fortunately, she hadn’t turned on the jets for fear they’d make too much noise. But there was no way she could get the cover on or creep back to the guesthouse without being seen, not beneath a full moon.
So she picked up her towel and darted under the deck instead, thinking she’d slip around the perimeter of the yard when she had the chance. She didn’t dare move quite yet, afraid she’d draw their attention.
“I
still
can’t believe your mother invited me to lunch.” Eve sounded pleased, and Sophia could understand why. She’d probably pass out from shock if Mrs. Dixon ever extended such a friendly invitation to her.
“Why?” Ted asked. “My mother’s always liked you.”
“You’ve told me that before. But it can be hard to tell.”
A bitter smile tugged at Sophia’s lips when she heard the wry note in Eve’s voice. She could’ve told Eve what it was like when Mrs. Dixon
didn’t
like you.
“She’s...selective about the people she accepts into her life,” Ted said. “But she has a positive impression of you from elementary school. So you had that going for you from the start.”
“She sure knew how to police the yard at lunch. I was terrified of her—like most other kids,” Eve said. But Sophia hadn’t been afraid of Mrs. Dixon back then. She hadn’t been afraid of anyone. She’d been sitting on top of the world.
Too bad she’d had to learn just how fast one could fall from such a lofty perch.
“My mom comes off as stern, but—” Ted stopped talking when they reached the hot tub—obviously he was reacting to finding the cover off. He glanced around as if he expected to see her or someone else, but she shrank farther into the shadows and behind one of the support beams, and his gaze passed over her without stopping. Since the guesthouse was dark, he probably thought she’d used the Jacuzzi earlier and forgotten to be polite about it.
She didn’t like the idea of him thinking she was careless enough with his belongings to do that—letting the heat escape when it was so expensive to keep the water hot. But he didn’t make a big deal about the cover to Eve. He didn’t even mention it, and she didn’t seem to notice. They just got in.
“She certainly wasn’t too pleased to hear about Sophia living here.” Eve’s voice was barely audible above the gurgle of the jets. She was no doubt being careful so that her voice wouldn’t travel to the guesthouse. Ted was careful, too, when he responded. But that didn’t make as much of a difference as they thought—not when she was standing a mere ten feet away.
“She’s never been one of Sophia’s admirers,” he admitted.
That came as no shock yet Sophia hated hearing it. She was too vulnerable to withstand much these days. And she felt even worse when Eve climbed into Ted’s lap and slipped her arms around his shoulders. “It’s nice out here.”
“We’re having a mild fall.”
“That means winter will probably hit hard.”
“It’s supposed to rain this weekend.”
When they kissed, Sophia attempted to look away. She didn’t want to see it—but her gaze moved back as if drawn there by a high-powered magnet.
Fortunately, Ted broke off the kiss before it led to anything else and started talking about the book he was writing. Then Eve brought up Adelaide’s baby, whom they’d just learned was a girl. After that they talked about the fact that both Kyle and Noah had invested with Skip, which Sophia hadn’t known and was sad to hear.
Hoping they might finally be preoccupied enough not to notice, she began to creep over to the fence so she could swing wide and follow it to the guesthouse. Despite the towel she’d wrapped around her, the heat she’d absorbed from sitting in the hot tub had slowly dissipated, leaving her chilled to the bone. But with the reference to Skip, the conversation had already worked its way back to her, and that made her pause despite her discomfort.
“Did you tell Sophia she can’t smoke in the guesthouse?” Eve asked.
“No, it never came up.”
“You should’ve warned her, since you feel so strongly about it.”
“I don’t think she’s smoking at all. At least, I haven’t seen her. Haven’t smelled it on her, either.”
“That’s good. It’s
so
unhealthy.”
He stretched out his arms along the sides of the Jacuzzi and leaned his head against the rim. “On the phone last Friday you said something that made me curious.”
“What was it?” she asked.
“You said Sophia told you she was taking up smoking because she couldn’t drink.”
Sophia clapped her hand over her mouth so they wouldn’t hear her gasp. Eve was aware of her drinking problem; they’d discussed it at length the night Eve brought Alexa home and made dinner. Sophia had been so despondent she hadn’t held anything back. She’d needed friendship too badly to pretend she was anything other than what she was, knew it was either grab on and trust, or sink into the quicksand of her depression.
But she didn’t feel quite the same need to be transparent now, didn’t want Eve to tell Ted about her addiction. Her situation was pitiful enough. She preferred to leave town without him ever having to learn.
“That’s what she said,” Eve told him.
“So...what stopped her from drinking?”
Eve had no reason to keep Sophia’s secrets, not from Ted. Sophia was mildly surprised she hadn’t already told him—and was downright stunned when Eve covered for her instead of blurting out the truth.
“She was in a vulnerable place,” she said. “She probably didn’t want it to mess with her mind.”
Relieved—and grateful—Sophia let her breath seep out.
“You’re okay that she’s living here, aren’t you?” Ted asked.
At least, that was what Sophia thought he said. He was almost whispering now.
“I’m trying to be,” she replied. “It’d be easier if she wasn’t so damn beautiful,” she added with an uncomfortable laugh.
Ted kissed her again. “You’re beautiful, too,” he said, and Sophia had to agree. Eve was even more beautiful on the inside.
Not long after that, Eve said she had to go; she had a big group coming to the B and B in the morning—several ladies from the Red Hat Society who were on an antiquing odyssey. Ted got out with her. Once he’d turned off the jets and they’d gone inside, Sophia had the perfect opportunity to return to the guesthouse. But she’d become so cold she couldn’t stop shivering.
She waited to see if Ted would come back and put on the cover. But when the minutes lengthened and he didn’t reappear, she assumed he’d forgotten, and decided to warm up before returning to bed.
After tossing her towel on a nearby chaise, she sank into the hot water all the way up to her neck. Blessed warmth! But before she could get comfortable, she heard the door open again. And this time she didn’t make it out of the Jacuzzi before Ted saw her.
23
“I
thought you were asleep,” he said.
Sophia froze on the steps, where she’d started to climb out. “No.”
“How long have you been out here?”
“For a while,” she admitted. “I’m sorry. I should’ve said something, but I didn’t want to upset Eve, didn’t want to ruin your night.”
He glanced around, as he had before. “Where were you?”
She gestured at the dark area under the deck. “I tried to make it back to the guesthouse unseen, but...there didn’t seem to be a good opportunity. I’m sorry,” she said again.
He seemed taken aback, as if he was embarrassed by what he and Eve had said—or should’ve been more careful when he saw the cover missing—but ultimately shrugged as if there was nothing he could do about it now.
“No worries.” He waved her back into the water, turned on the jets and climbed in himself. “It’s just...late. And the past few nights have been rough. Why aren’t you sleeping?”
She slid around to the other side, putting as much distance between them as possible. “I napped for a little while. And then—” she shrugged “—I woke up and couldn’t seem to relax. I thought this might help.”
“Probably feels funny, being in a strange place, but you’ll get used to it.” He studied her through the steam. “How did Alexa do at school today?”
He acted like he really cared. “It seemed to go pretty well.”
“No trouble with Connie?”
“Nothing more than a verbal threat.”
“That girl had better not act on it.” Leaning back, he gazed at the stars overhead. “How does Lex feel about moving here?”
“Seems okay with it. She knows we’re lucky to have a comfortable place to live. She’s grateful to you.”
“She’s a good kid.”
Sophia smiled. In a way, it felt like she and her daughter were getting to know each other,
really
know each other, for the first time—and Sophia liked what she saw. “She is.”
He shook his hair off his face. “I looked but I didn’t see a receipt for the extra groceries and other stuff you bought today—the flowers and candles.”
“That was my treat. I don’t expect you to repay me.”
“You wanted Eve and me to have flowers and candles?”
“I know it’s not much. I just hoped to make your dinner extra nice. You’ve both been so generous to me.”
He didn’t say anything but his eyes never left her face.
“What?” she said, growing uncomfortable. Being out here alone with Ted like this, in the dark, made her have thoughts she
shouldn’t
be having—especially after Eve’s kindness in not telling Ted about her alcoholism. She wouldn’t do anything that might undermine Eve’s happiness, wouldn’t reveal the longing she felt now, and had felt for years.
“It was nice,” he said. “Eve liked it.”
She cleared her throat. “I’m glad.” She wondered if
he’d
liked it, too. He didn’t say, but she got the impression that he had.
When she found herself glancing at his bare shoulders, wishing things could be different, she stood up. “I’ll let you have some time to yourself.”
“Sophia?”
She looked at him as she passed.
“You seem to have changed a great deal.”
“Well, it would have to be for the better, right? There was only one way to go.” She laughed as if she wasn’t quite serious, but she knew that he—and half of Whiskey Creek—would probably agree with that statement.
She stepped out and got her towel, but even then he didn’t let her leave. “How’s your mother?”
It’d been ages since anyone had asked about Elaine. Her mother had been gone from Whiskey Creek for so many years that the hole her absence had initially created in the community had filled in long ago. At least that seemed to be true for everyone else. Sophia found it ironic, considering that the town had once revolved around her parents.
“She was okay the last time I checked,” she said. “I don’t speak to her very often.”
“Because...”
She wanted to blame Skip. He’d been so nasty whenever she planned to visit the hospital. “I don’t see the point!” he’d growl, and he’d usually refuse to go with her. But she knew the real reason she avoided contact ran much deeper.
“She doesn’t know me anymore,” she said. She wasn’t sure why she’d told him about her mother. That wasn’t something she normally talked about. It had just...popped out, as if she couldn’t keep something so painful inside anymore. But she regretted it the second the words left her lips and she saw the sympathy on his face. She didn’t want him to think she was trying to make excuses for herself or manipulate his emotions. So she hurried to get behind closed doors where she couldn’t say anything else. And where she’d no longer be tempted to tell him how much she’d always loved him.
* * *
Cheyenne and Dylan were at coffee the next morning. So were Riley, Callie, Levi, Kyle and Eve. Once again, Ted had thought about skipping the weekly ritual. He was falling so far behind on his book. He figured that provided the perfect excuse to avoid the ribbing he was going to get for helping Sophia after being so opinionated about her. But then Eve called to see if he’d pick her up, and he knew that with Sophia living in his guesthouse, he needed to do all he could to be available to Eve and help his girlfriend feel secure.
When they walked into Black Gold together, they weren’t holding hands or doing anything else to announce that they were a couple—and yet Cheyenne’s smile stretched so wide Ted could tell she knew. That meant Dylan did, too—and the others would inevitably find out. He wasn’t ready for the added pressure. He and Eve would be the first official couple inside the group after all the years they’d been friends and that would generate more attention than he felt comfortable with. Especially now, when he had so much going on inside his head. But he couldn’t expect to keep the relationship a secret for very long. They were both too close to their friends.
At least it would put any suspicions that he had plans to get back with Sophia to rest.
Noah was the first to start in. “Hey, Ted. I hear that Sophia got a job.”
Everyone sitting at the table laughed and glanced at each other.
“I heard that, too.” Kyle joined the fun. “Apparently she wasn’t quite so mean in high school that you couldn’t forgive her. So...tell me, what was all
that
talk about?”
“Shut up,” Ted grumbled. “It’s not as if any of you were stepping up to help.”
“You were the one with the job,” Noah said. “We’re heading into the winter, which is my slowest time. I would’ve had to let someone go in order to hire her, and that didn’t seem fair.”
Ted spread his hands. “I felt sorry for her, okay? No big deal.”
“What was it he said last week?” Riley asked. “‘Actions have consequences’?”
Thank God no one seemed to know he’d let her move in with him, too....
Eve slipped her arm through his. “Come on, guys. Go easy. No matter what he says, Ted has a heart the size of Texas. That shouldn’t come as any surprise.”
Ted didn’t want Eve sticking up for him. It made the change in their relationship too obvious—obvious enough that Kyle suddenly took note of the possessive way she was touching him. “What do
you
know about his heart?” he asked.
Eve let go of him and tried to shrug it off. “We’ve been friends for years.”
“Are you
still
friends?” Riley asked, searching their faces.
Ted couldn’t
deny
the truth. That would imply that he was embarrassed about their involvement. So when Eve seemed uncertain about how to respond, he came out with it. “We’re seeing each other.”
Adelaide’s mouth dropped open. “Seeing each other as in...
dating?
”
“Isn’t that what seeing each other is?” he asked.
“I wasn’t sure, since you’ve been friends for so long and see each other all the time.” Addy hadn’t been part of the original group, hadn’t even been around after high school. Noah had included her when she returned a year ago.
“Since when?” Callie asked.
“Halloween,” Cheyenne chipped in with a knowing laugh.
“Whoa, apparently
some
people had more fun in the hot tub than others,” Riley teased.
Eve blushed. “Do you have to make it so embarrassing? It’s enough of a transition already.”
Noah rubbed his chin. “You hired Sophia but you’re dating Eve. Interesting reversal.”
Ted sent him a look that told him to stuff it. “We’ll skip the editorials, if you don’t mind.” Eager to get away from the group until the shock wore off, he turned to Eve. “Can I get you something? You want a yogurt?”
“Oh, my gosh!” Cheyenne cried. “How weird that Ted’s going to be buying Eve’s yogurt from now on!”
Kyle was the only one who didn’t seem to think this development was funny. He hadn’t said a word since the “big reveal”—and he got up and followed Ted to the line of people waiting to order at the register. “Hey, man, are you sure you know what you’re doing?” He kept a smile on his face, for the sake of the others, but his eyes were serious.
Ted couldn’t admit the truth, couldn’t show any uncertainty. That wouldn’t be fair to Eve. “Of course.”
Putting his back to the group’s table, Kyle tried again. “You remember how it went when Callie and I—”
“I remember,” he broke in to save him from having to spell it out.
“You have to think long and hard before getting that intimate with one of these girls.”
“I
have
thought about it.”
Kyle gave him a skeptical look as they moved forward in line.
“What?” Ted snapped, irritated by the fact that Kyle was forcing him to examine his motives and decisions.
“It’s just...so fast. One day you’re friends, like always. And now you’re lovers?”
“These things happen. You should know.”
“Exactly. So...where’s the heat between you two?”
“Maybe it’s not that kind of relationship.”
When the person ahead of them in line seemed to be listening, Kyle lowered his voice. “But it’s supposed to be now, isn’t it?”
“Eve and I don’t base everything on sexual attraction. Not
everything,
” he repeated when he realized that made it sound as if he didn’t want to make love to her.
“Listen...”
The guy ahead of them ordered, giving them more space but less time than they probably needed to finish this conversation.
“I lost the one girl I was dying to have,” Kyle went on.
Ted was surprised to hear him confess that, for him, there’d been no one who could compare to Olivia.
“It hasn’t been the same with anyone since,” he continued. “My marriage failed for a lot of reasons, but first and foremost it was because I didn’t love Noelle to begin with. We should never have gotten together. The year I spent with her, and the year I spent recovering from the divorce, which is when I slept with Callie, were the two worst years of my life. Some days it’s still hard dealing with the aftermath. Besides all the emotional bullshit, I have to pay Noelle a hefty amount of spousal maintenance each month. That means there’s no way to cut her out of my life entirely.”
Not only that, but he had to watch his stepbrother with the woman he really wanted—although Brandon and Olivia hadn’t shown up today.
“Anyway,” Kyle went on, “I don’t want you or Eve to go through anything like I did.”
The earnest emotion in his plea scared Ted. He’d been so decisive, so sure he could remain committed to Eve. But when he made love with her—like last night before they got into the Jacuzzi—it just wasn’t as satisfying as he wanted it to be. He’d actually felt a little...hollow afterward.
Was he letting her down by trying to force this? Were they better off taking a step back and admitting that they felt pretty much the same way they’d always felt toward each other? Or were
his
emotions the only ones that weren’t changing?
She seemed so happy. He didn’t want to wreck that, didn’t want to hurt her. He’d already promised himself he wouldn’t. Besides, he wasn’t sure he’d given it long enough to make a final decision. They used to tease Noah for his inability to commit. Ted had never messed around as much as Noah had, but he suspected
he
was the one with a commitment problem—and that came as a shock.
“Why did you decide to make a move on Eve?” Kyle asked.
It had seemed safe. Smart. But was that only because she wasn’t Sophia? He had to admit he hadn’t been thinking clearly on Halloween night, even though he’d assured himself that he was. Alcohol had a way of doing that to a person.
“Can I help you?”
The barista was ready to take their order, so Ted couldn’t answer Kyle’s question. There was no time. And he was grateful for that. He couldn’t imagine what might come out of his mouth now that he felt so torn. He didn’t want to say he’d been drinking. That would only convince Kyle that he had indeed made a huge mistake.
But something in his eyes must have revealed his uncertainty because Kyle took one look at him, shook his head and cursed.
* * *
Eve was busy that night. And she was going to be gone for the next week. It was her grandmother’s eightieth birthday, so she was flying to Montana with her parents for a family reunion and party. That gave Ted some breathing room. He was relieved to have it, needed the time to write. But it wasn’t as if he could slip into isolation like he used to. Although Sophia was supposed to be off on the weekends—that was what he’d originally intended when he’d advertised for a housekeeper—she was so grateful for the free rent and so determined to do all she could to repay him that she insisted on cooking for him regardless of the day. And it was tough to complain about that when she made such delicious meals, which were always right when he wanted them.
There were other benefits to having her around, as well. He wasn’t sure he’d ever seen the house quite so clean. And if he listened carefully, he could hear laughter, which somehow made him smile. It was Alexa, who spent her time with her mother whenever she was out of school. He liked Sophia’s daughter, he realized, despite her paternity.
It was Saturday night and the two of them were in the kitchen. Sophia was instructing her daughter on how to tell if a turkey potpie was done when he walked into the room.