Authors: Cindy Stark
It
was strange being back in Jase's house. The loveseat was still the same warm
shade of chocolate. With the exception of some new lamps, everything seemed
the same. "It feels like I never left."
Carole
picked up a russet-colored pillow and plucked at the fringe. "We wish you
hadn't." She held up a hand. "I know. We had to respect your
choices, but things have gotten worse with Jase."
Allie's
chest tightened. "What's happened? Is Jase okay?"
Carole
snorted. "He's fine, but he's never here. As usual, he's in Chicago,
pretending he's a mobster, hell-bent on getting revenge. He thinks we have no
clue what he's doing, but we're not dumb. We read the papers and surf the
Internet. His family would roll over in their graves if they knew he was
wasting his life this way."
"Is
he still managing to avoid the law?"
"Who
knows these days? I think he's formed his own sort of vigilante gang. But is
he involved in drugs and prostitution? No, I don't think so. That's not the
type of man he is."
Allie
smiled. She'd always sensed that about him. Deep down, she'd known he was a
good person, even if he did borderline illegal things. Look what he'd done for
her. She caught herself before she became too enamored with his good qualities
and reminded herself why she was there.
"You
should have seen him, Allie, back before the tragedy. He always wanted to help
people. He'd planned to go to medical school." Carole patted her hand.
"He'd have made an amazing doctor." Her lips flattened into a thin
line. "That Trasatti family didn't kill just three people that day.
Jase's body might still be alive, but his soul has been as good as dead ever
since."
She
eyed Allie. "Except for the time he spent with you. He was a different
man then." Her smile returned. "He could be again, you know."
Allie
nodded. "He needs to leave Chicago and never look back. He has such a
wonderful place here. It amazes me that he can't see that."
Carole
smiled, seeming to approve of Allie's concern. "We wouldn't see him at
all if it wasn't for—" She stopped, her gaze locking on to Allie.
An
awkward silence filled the space between them. "If it wasn't for
what?" What wasn't Carole saying?
Carole's
features turned as smooth as granite, and she looked away. "Oh, he bought
this damn horse, Muffin, swearing he'd be around to take care of her, but he's
not, so Robert and I end up doing the brunt of the work."
"Muffin?"
Allie snorted. "Jase named a horse Muffin?"
Carole
shrugged, but didn't join in the joke. "That man does strange things
sometimes."
Sensing
Carole had lost her good mood, Allie stifled her laughter. "I'd hoped I'd
find him here. I need to discuss a few things with him." Like learning
how to stay one hundred percent out of her life.
Carole
pursed her lips. "I have no idea when he'll be back around."
"Do
you have a way I can reach him in Chicago? You must have his number." If
she couldn't tell him off face-to-face, a phone call would be second best. She
refused to leave Oregon without resolving her problems.
"I
suppose it wouldn't hurt to call him. We're not supposed to unless it's an
emergency." She smiled at Allie. "But under the circumstances, I
think it would be okay."
Allie
understood his need for privacy and his desperate wish to keep this part of his
life a secret, but he had nothing to fear from her in that respect.
"Thanks, Carole. I really appreciate you doing this." If Carole had
any idea what Allie was about to say, she'd probably refuse to make the call.
"Honey,
all I can hope is he's not fool enough to let you go a second time. If he
does, well, there's not much I can do about it."
Allie
admired the woman standing before her, and she hated to disappoint her.
"You should know my goal is to get him to stay out of my life so I can
move forward in a new relationship."
"I
wondered as much." She nodded once. "And just so you know, my goal
is to get you two together again and watch the sparks catch fire. Getting you
both talking is the first step."
A
small shiver rushed through Allie at the mention of sparks. A lack of heat was
one problem she'd never encountered with Jase. "I guess we understand
each other, then."
Carole
gave her the sweetest smile. "I guess we do. You should also know, I'm a
fierce competitor."
Allie
laughed as Carole left the room to retrieve her cell phone.
"Grandma!"
Carole
hadn't been gone a minute when a young boy rushed into the sitting room. He
skidded to a halt when he spied Allie, his dark eyes wary. Boo jumped to
attention, but didn't leave her side.
"Where's
my grandma?" His dark curly hair was damp with sweat, and he had
splotches of mud on his bright green shirt. He clutched a jar of bugs between
his hands.
"She
went to get her phone, but I'm sure she'll be right back."
The
boy didn't reply, but continued to stare. His gaze darted between her and Boo,
and the look on his face told her he was a little nervous of them both.
"I'm
a friend of your grandma." She gave him a smile she hoped would put him
at ease. "My name is Allie. What's yours?"
He
hesitated a moment. "A.J."
"Oh,
see." She smiled, wanting to make friends with the cute little boy.
"We have something in common. Our first names both start with A. And
this is my friend, Boo." She reached down and petted his furry head.
"It looks like you've got quite a collection of bugs. Did you find them
all by yourself?"
A.J.
relaxed. "Uh-huh. Grandpa Robert showed me how to find them under rocks
and stuff." He paused, eyeing Boo again. "Is your dog nice?"
"Oh,
he's very nice. Why don't you come say hello?"
He
came forward and put a hand out to Boo. The dog licked A.J.'s hand before
rubbing his head against it. The little boy laughed and held out his jar to
Allie. "They're called tater bugs. If you want, you can hold 'em."
Allie
took the glass jar and gazed inside at the numerous black-ridged bugs that were
covered by two crumpled maple leaves. "Did you give them the leaves so
they'd have something to eat?"
"Uh-huh."
Keeping one hand on Boo, he pointed a dirty finger at the jar. "See the
big one? He's the king."
"Yes,
I see that." Allie found herself chuckling. The little boy had
completely charmed her, and apparently Boo, too. Her dog started licking
A.J.'s hand and appeared intent on making his way up his arm. "Do the bugs
have a queen, too?"
"No."
His smile faded. "I had her, but I dropped her in the bushes before I
could get her to go inside the jar. Then I couldn't find her." He raised
his brows, his dark eyes twinkling. "Maybe you and Boo could help me find
her?"
How
could she say no to that? "We'd love to." Allie stood, a small pain
piercing her heart. Carole's grandson would be close to her own daughter's
age. Did she spend her afternoons collecting bugs, too?
Sometimes,
the ache from giving up her child was too much. And lately, it seemed all she
could think about was Jase or her daughter. She had to stop those thoughts.
They were debilitating. She'd done the right thing. She knew that. Allie had
a new life now and needed to keep her focus where it belonged.
Allie
let A.J. lead her and her dog to a row of rhododendrons that edged the side of
the house. Several fist-sized rocks had been rolled over beneath them, and
Allie could see a few of the hostas had been mashed in the process.
"The
queen's in there." He pointed to a clump of blue-green leaves.
"Okay,
then." Allie got down on her knees and spread apart the leaves. It only
took a few seconds of moving the foliage before she spied a "tater"
bug. She caught the hard black body between her thumb and forefinger, and
pulled it out. The bug curled into a ball as she sat it in her palm for him to
inspect. "I think I found her." The bug uncurled and started
creeping across her hand toward her wrist, tickling her.
"That's
it! That's her." A huge smile pushed out his cheeks, giving her a
glimpse of his sweet dimples. He screwed off the lid and held out the jar.
Allie
nudged the bug off her hand and into the glass container. She wasn't sure she
could have given the boy a better gift.
"A.J."
Carole walked up and put an arm around her grandson. "I wondered if you
might have stolen my guest."
"She
helped me find the queen." A.J. thrust out his jar for inspection.
"And she has a dog." He said it as though that made Allie some sort
of god.
Carole
ruffled his hair. "That's wonderful. It looks like Allie has a magical
touch, doesn't it?"
"Uh-huh."
He gave her a quick smile.
"Why
don't you see if you can find Grandpa Robert and show him your queen? He's
working on the faucet in his house. Maybe you can help him with that,
too."
"Can
Boo come?"
When
his grandma agreed, the little boy's mouth split into a grin. He took off at a
dead run around the corner of the house, the black dog following behind.
"Little
boys and dogs." Carole sighed. "I wish I had their energy."
"He's
darling, Carole."
"He
is." Carole nodded. "He's the greatest joy in my life. But you
didn't come here to meet A.J." She held up the phone. "Let's give
Jase a call, shall we?"
Carole
dialed the number, giving Allie a conspiratorial smile. "Jase, it's
Carole."
Allie
could hear the echo of his voice coming across the line. Just knowing he was
on the other end gave her butterflies. She hadn't seen or heard from him since
the day he'd left her in Portland. Hearing his voice brought back the
long-buried yearning to be safe in his arms once again. She mentally torched
those thoughts. She was her own woman now, strong and independent.
"It's
not exactly an emergency. I have Allie here with me and—" Carole stopped
short. "No. No." She paused again. "She came here to see
you. She needs to talk to you." Carole didn't say anything for a moment
and then put down her phone. She turned to Allie with a disgruntled look.
"I believe that man just hung up on me."
"What?"
Allie hadn't expected that reaction from Jase. "What did he say?"
"He
said to tell you to go back to California and your new man. There's no reason
for you to be at his ranch." Carole snorted.
"My
new man? What does that mean? Is he spying on me, too?" Outrage clouded
her veins. If he knew about Ryan, then why did he continue to send money? If
Jase didn't want her on his ranch, then why did he keep interfering in
her
life?
"Are
you serious about this new man?" Carole suddenly seemed concerned Ryan
might pose a threat to her plans.
"What
difference does it make? Jase doesn't want me anywhere near his life, but he
won't stay out of mine."
"It's
because he loves you."
Allie
turned her frustration on Carole. "How can you say that? He sent me
away. He refuses to have any contact." She blew out a derisive breath.
"That doesn't sound like love to me." She paused as thoughts
continued to burst in her brain like fireworks. "And, I refuse to be sent
away again like a chastised puppy." She snatched the phone from Carole's
hand and hit redial.
"Don't
bother me, Carole." Jase's voice rumbled across the line.
Allie's
heart squeezed. "This isn't Carole. It's Allie."
The
line went silent.
"I
know you're there, Jase." The silence pierced her. Was it so difficult
for him to be civil to her? "I'm not trying to come back into your life.
I don't want anything from you. In fact, that's the reason I called. I'd like
you to stop sending money to my bank account."
The
silence seemed like it would continue forever, but then he answered.
"Why?"
It
wasn't the answer she'd expected. "What do you mean, why?" She
didn't think she needed a reason. "I don't need it anymore. I want to
thank you very much for your generosity, but I'm quite capable of taking care
of myself these days."
More
silence. "I don't have time for this right now, Allie. It's my money.
I'll worry about what I do with it. Go back to California where you're
safe."
The
phone clicked in her ear. She dropped her jaw as she turned to Carole.
"I don't believe it. He hung up on me, too."
Carole
clucked as she shook her head. "That man is impossible."
"
And
he refused to stop sending the money." Allie looked at her friend in
earnest. "How am I ever supposed to have a normal life if he won't stop
interfering?"
Carole
shrugged. "You know
I
don't want you to have a normal life if it
doesn't include Jase." She tilted her head as though reconsidering her
words. "Well, I do want you to be happy, but I just think you'll both be
happier together."