SVH06-Dangerous Love (12 page)

It was Mr. Collins.

"Is there anything new?" Todd asked, sitting up straight.

"They just told me she's in stable condition but hasn't woken up," Mr. Collins said, still standing in the doorway.

"Nothing new," Todd muttered.

"Come on. Let's go get something to eat," Mr. Collins suggested.

"I'm not really hungry," Todd replied.

"From what I hear, you were injured too. You've gotta keep your strength up," Mr. Collins told him, walking over and putting his hand on Todd's shoulder. "Seriously. This isn't a suggestion; it's an order."

Todd rolled his eyes. "Fine."

He winced against the pain in his leg as he stood, and limped as he followed Mr. Collins out of the room. Luckily, the vending machines were down the hall, farther away from the waiting room where Liz's family and friends were gathered. Todd put some money in the machine and bought himself a bag of pretzels. Mr. Collins got a coffee and a sleeve of mini donuts. Together they went back to the empty waiting room and sat down at a small round table in the corner.

"So, how are you holding up?" Mr. Collins asked.

"Not well," Todd replied. He bit into a pretzel and it tasted like dust. "I don't know what I'm going to do if she doesn't wake up. It's not fair. Why am I walking around fine and she's in there? It's so not fair."

"You think it should be you in there?" Mr. Collins said.

"Yeah, it should be me!" Todd said emphatically. "It was my bike, my responsibility. I should be the one who's... who's..." He couldn't finish the sentence. He paused and rubbed his hand over his eyes and sighed. "It's just not fair."

"Todd, what happened, exactly?" Mr. Collins asked, holding his coffee cup with both hands.

Todd took a deep breath and sat forward. He explained it to Mr. Collins the same way he'd explained it to the police.

"We were coming down the hill and I was going real slow, taking my time--you know, so Liz would feel safe." He had to pause for a moment as a sob welled up in his throat. "We were just coming to a turn when all of a sudden there were these huge headlights glaring down at me on the wrong side of the road. I tried to swerve, but it was too late. Honestly, I thought I heard the SUV's engine rev. Like when he saw us, he hit the gas by mistake instead of the brakes."

"That must have been terrifying," Mr. Collins said sympathetically.

"All I could think about was Liz," Todd said. "It was about two seconds, but all that went through my mind as we skidded out was trying to hold on to Liz. But she was holding on to me. And when I felt her arms slip . .."

A tear spilled down Todd's cheek and he quickly wiped it away.

"We don't have to talk about this if you don't want to," Mr. Collins said.

"You know what the most ridiculous thing is?" Todd

said with a sniff. "I knew Crunch had been drinking all night."

"What? How?" Mr. Collins asked, his brow creased.

"I was hanging out over at his house earlier and he kept downing beers," Todd said, feeling lower than low. "But when I left, he swore to me that he wasn't going anywhere, so I figured he'd pass out and sleep it off. Instead, this happens." He paused and hazarded a glance at the teacher, who seemed to be slowly processing all this. "I sold him the bike," Todd told him. "Tonight was going to be my last night with it. If only I hadn't caved in to Liz. But she wouldn't take no for an answer. ... God, I hate myself."

Mr. Collins blinked and looked Todd in the eye. "What do you mean, if you hadn't caved in?"

"I went over to the country club just to talk to her after Enid's party, and when she heard I was giving up the bike, she was all about going for a ride," Todd said. "Like she knew it would be her only chance or something and she just wanted to try it. I should have said no. I'm such an idiot."

"Wait. So you're saying that Liz asked you to take her out on the bike?" Mr. Collins said, sitting up straight. "You didn't talk her into it?"

"No. Why?" Todd asked.

"Well, then I don't really see how this is all your fault, as you seem to believe," Mr. Collins said. "Elizabeth knew what she was doing. She's a smart girl. It sounds to me like she made her own decision and you simply went along with it."

"Yeah, but I don't think she thought any of this was going to happen," Todd said flatly.

"Of course she didn't, but she knew the potential consequences," Mr. Collins said. "This wasn't your fault. And I'm sure the Wakefields agree too."

Todd scoffed bitterly. "You're wrong about that one. They don't even want to look at me right now. They do think it's my fault and they're right."

"No, they're not," Mr. Collins said. "This is Jerry McAllister's fault, no one else's. He was the one who was out driving drunk. He was the one who caused the accident, not you. You can't blame yourself for something you never could have predicted or prevented."

Tears flowed from Todd's eyes and this time he did nothing to stop them.

"Todd, we both know how headstrong Liz can be," Mr. Collins said, scooting forward and resting his arms on the table. "I have a hard time believing anyone could say no to her when she gets on a roll. It's part of the reason she's going to make such an amazing reporter one day."

If she ever wakes up, Todd's morbid mind added.

"Do yourself a favor and let yourself off the hook," Mr. Collins said firmly. "I know Liz wouldn't want you feeling this way."

Todd sniffed and wiped under his eyes. "I know. She wouldn't."

"Good," Mr. Collins said. He finally opened his sleeve of donuts and popped one into his mouth. "My work here is done," he said with a wry smile.

Todd almost smiled back, but then Steven appeared in the doorway, looking as pale as the white hospital walls all around him.

"What is it?" Mr. Collins asked, standing.

"It's Liz," Steven said, gripping the doorjamb with both hands. "Something about the MRI ... They're doing emergency surgery to relieve pressure on her brain. They're not sure if she's going to make it."

CHAPTER 11

The strong morning sun warmed Todd's face and he blinked a few times as he awoke, trying to get his bearings. It was never this bright in his room. Or this ... itchy. He heard an intercom announcement and sat up straight, suddenly remembering where he was and why he had passed out on this rough old couch.

The accident. The horrible agony of the night before.

He glanced around and found that he was once again alone in his little waiting room. His watch told him that it was seven o'clock. How long had he slept? He had no idea. He remembered being awake at four in the morning, when Elizabeth had come out of her

Surgery. He had waited through the four-hour process alone and in agonized fear until Mr. Collins had come and told him that she had survived the invasive procedure and was back in her room in the ICU--still unconscious.

After he had heard that Elizabeth's condition was stable once again, Todd had finally given in to the fatigue he had been fighting, and he had curled up on an empty sofa in his lounge to sleep. Now he stood up, fueled by new adrenaline, and jogged down to the waiting room outside the ICU. There he found Mr. Wakefield sitting in a chair with his arm around his wife. Both of them looked exhausted and sad. Hesitantly, Todd approached them. He didn't care how they reacted to him right then. He had to know what was going on.

"How is she?" he asked quietly.

"The same," Mr. Wakefield said, his voice dry.

"But there's no permanent brain damage, thank goodness," Mrs. Wakefield added.

"So is she ...?"

"No. She hasn't woken up," Mr. Wakefield said. "She's still in a coma."

Todd's heart sunk. For some reason he had convinced himself that she would wake up during the night. That he would be able to see her smile that morning and tell

her how sorry he was. But no. She was still unconscious. Who knew if he'd ever have the chance to apologize?

"What the hell are you still doing in here?"

Todd whirled around at the sound of Steven's angry voice. He had just walked in, carrying bags of fast-food breakfast, and he looked like he was about ready to tackle Todd to the ground.

"I... I was just--"

"This is all your fault," Steven said, getting right in Todd's face. He threw the bags down onto the table and clenched his fists. "How could you take her out on that thing? How could you when you knew what could happen?"

Todd opened his mouth to respond, but Jessica cut him off.

"Steven, back off," she said firmly.

She walked over to them from the direction of the ICU patient rooms. Her makeup was streaked, her white slacks dotted with dirt, and her hair pulled back in a messy bun. There was a sleep crease down the left side of her face, as if she had slept on a folded sheet all night long. She looked tired and resigned.

"If this is anyone's fault, it's mine," she said, her voice unusually quiet. "Blame me."

"Jessica, what are you talking about?" her father asked.

"I didn't have the guts to tell you this last night, but the only reason Liz had to go with Todd was because I left her there, at the country club," Jessica said, hugging her bare arms. "I totally forgot I was supposed to give her a ride. Self-absorbed, as always," she added bitterly. "If I hadn't been in my own little world, she would have been fine. So blame me, not Todd."

"Oh, honey," Mrs. Wakefield said, getting up and putting her arm around her daughter. "We don't blame you. Either of you," she said pointedly, looking at Todd. "Roger Collins told us about your little talk," she said. "We know Elizabeth asked you to take her for a ride. And we also know how hard it is to say no to that girl when she sets her mind to something."

"We're sorry we were so awful to you last night, Todd," Mr. Wakefield added, standing. "We were just so upset."

"I know. So was I," Todd replied.

Steven sighed. "Sorry, man," he said sheepishly.

"It's okay," Todd said, feeling somewhat relieved. At least he didn't have to avoid Liz's family anymore. At least they could all get through this together.

"You know, I remembered something last night," Jessica said, looking at Todd. "When the police were taking Crunch away, he said he was going to buy your bike. You were selling it to him, weren't you? For Liz."

Todd shrugged. "Yeah. It was no fun without her, so ..."

"Todd, why didn't you tell us any of this last night?" Mrs. Wakefield asked.

"I don't know. I guess I thought it would just sound like I was making excuses or something," Todd said.

Mrs. Wakefield stepped away from Jessica and reached up to hug Todd. "I'm so sorry, kiddo," she said. "I know you love Elizabeth just as much as we do."

Todd nodded as he hugged her back. "I just hope Liz knows," he said. "I hope she knows and that she wakes up soon so we can all tell her."

Once Jessica found out from the doctors that Elizabeth could most likely hear her, she spent the entire day in her sister's room, talking about anything and everything that came to mind. Except for the IV tubes in Liz's arm and the respirator hissing by her side, she looked as if she were sleeping peacefully, so Jessica read to her from Us Weekly, chatted about Enid's party, and told her all about the dozens of people who stopped by all day to visit. She even described all the flower arrangements, balloon bouquets, and stuffed animals that crowded the

room. By the time the sun started to go down, she had talked herself hoarse.

"So then, Lila totally slapped Tom McKay across the face. Can you believe it? She actually risked her nails, so you know he did something seriously wrong," Jessica rattled on. "That's going to have to go in your next column."

She glanced at Elizabeth's face, hoping for some kind of reaction. A blink. A twitch of a smile. But nothing.

"Come on, Liz," Jessica said, sitting down next to the bed and taking Elizabeth's hand. "You have to wake up! You know I can't live without you. Not to put any pressure on you. I mean, the last thing you need right now is pressure, but... what am I supposed to do if you don't wake up?"

There was a quick knock at the door and Jessica jumped up when she saw Todd waiting outside. She opened the door and swiftly ushered him in.

"It's supposed to be immediate family only," she whispered.

"I know. Winston created a diversion so I could sneak by the nurse's station," Todd whispered back.

Jessica smirked. "Do I even want to know?"

"Probably not," Todd said. "It involved a fake seizure and Pop Rocks; let's leave it at that."

Jessica covered her mouth to keep from laughing. Todd glanced over at Elizabeth and his face grew wan.

"How is she?" he asked.

"Well, she's a very good listener," Jessica replied, her mirth dying quickly away. "I overheard a doctor say that the longer she stays like this, the worse her chances will be," she said, her heart skipping a scared beat.

"She'll pull through." Todd took a chair and sat across the bed from Jessica's seat. "She has to."

Jessica sat down again and gazed across Elizabeth's prone form at Todd. "You still think it's your fault, don't you?"

"I shouldn't have taken her. It was late and it was a Saturday night. Of course some drunk jerk was going to be out on the roads. I should have thought ahead." He reached up and touched Elizabeth's hair, tucking it gently behind her ear.

"When I first saw her lying on the road, I wanted to kill you," Jessica confessed. "All I could think about was Rex. But then later, when I realized it was my fault too ... Honestly, I just wanted to kill myself. If Brian and I had only remembered five minutes sooner. .."

"Jess, at that point Elizabeth knew you weren't coming back for her," Todd told her.

"She did?"

"Please. She knows you too well. Why do you think she had Enid's mother pegged for a backup ride?" he said with a twinkle in his eye. "It's not your fault. She could have called a cab or called another friend. She wanted to get on the bike. It was funny, actually. It was so out of nowhere and impulsive ... I kept thinking it was more like something you'd do than her."