Authors: Maryann Jordan
Blushing, she moved back to her seat, picking up her chopsticks again before looking at him, waiting for his answer.
“I haven’t made any firm commitments for after I get out. I could use my civil engineering degree and work for a company…or who knows,” he admitted evasively.
Nodding, she accepted his answer and looked down at the mostly empty containers. “So where do we want to start?” she asked, gathering the plates from the table. Putting everything away, she turned back and said, “Let’s sit in the living room and see what we’ve got.”
Wanting to keep her interested in him, he kept his mouth shut about the move.
We’re just working together right now. Nothing more. I don’t need to tell her my long-range plans.
The more he tried to convince himself that they could keep everything professional, the more he knew it was a lie.
They sat on opposite ends of the sofa, facing each other. She set her tea on the coffee table next to his beer, before turning her attention back to him. He watched her carefully, loving the way her face was so expressive. No pretense. Just honest emotion.
He began, “I talked to my sister’s fiancé and he got the address of the truck driver. I was going to go see him tomorrow after work—”
“I want to come also,” Evie exclaimed excitedly.
Looking askance, Patrick said, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Oh please! It’ll be broad daylight and we’ll talk to him on his stoop. What harm can come from that?”
As much as he hated the thought of her being involved, he had to admit that she might have insight when talking to the driver.
Taking a sip of her tea, she looked at him as he appeared to be puzzling over something. “So what do you think happened?”
Leaning back on the sofa, he said, “The easiest explanation is that the driver went somewhere and had someone arrange to take the equipment off of the truck. Then he drove to the base with what was left.”
“But that would have taken organization…time to plan. He was a substitute truck driver, not the regular one. How would he even know when he was being called?” she asked.
Patrick wrestled with how much he should tell her about his fears, but understood she was smart enough to begin putting all the puzzle pieces together by herself. Sighing, he plunged ahead, “Then that would indicate that someone from the inside knew what was going to happen, when it was going to happen, make the arrangement…including needing the truck driver.”
Evie’s eyes opened wide at the implication.
Someone from the inside? Inside of my workplace? Maybe someone I know?
P
atrick saw the look of distress cross Evie’s face and was filled with the desire to take it away. “We don’t know…we don’t know it was someone you might work with. It might have been some arrangement the truck drivers made.”
Nodding hesitantly, she searched his eyes. “But it could be, couldn’t it? It could be someone inside GMS…someone I know…someone I work with.”
“Damn, Evie, I’m not sure,” he sighed heavily, leaning back against the sofa. Keeping his gaze on hers, he watched as her mind began to puzzle through possibilities.
Sharp as a fuckin’ tack. She’ll be questioning everyone she meets at GMS.
“Look, we have to play this cool. The last thing we want is someone getting spooked because you’re asking a lot of questions and snooping around.”
Disgust crossed her face as she scowled. “I’m not that naïve! I’m not going to go into work and announce ‘Hey y’all, who was involved in stealing equipment?’”
“Down, tiger. I didn’t mean to imply that you would do that.” He grinned, then gave in to the desire to lean over and gently brush a strand of hair back behind her ear. The fire remained in her eyes, but he knew the instant it changed from irritation to lust. Moving ever so slowly toward her, he halted a whisper away from her lips. His gaze, speaking his question, received the answer he longed for and he leaned in further. His lips met hers, in a barely-there kiss…almost more of a touch than a taste.
Leaning back, his gaze continued to search hers, this time seeing a thread of doubt mixed with the lust.
Don’t do this, man. Don’t cross this line.
His head attempted to rule his heart, but the pounding of his blood drowned out the voice. Angling his head, he claimed her lips, moving over them, tasting them, memorizing them. Licking her seam, he plunged when they opened beneath his.
Pulling her body closer to his, he settled her on his lap, her back against his left arm and her legs now stretched out across the sofa cushions. Cupping her jaw with his right hand, he smoothed his rough thumb over her silken cheek. He only meant the kiss to satisfy his curiosity, assuage his need for her, but it flamed and he had no desire to douse the fire.
Evie, her chest heaving as his lips continued their assault on her senses, clung to his shoulders for balance. Giving into the moment, her tongue sucked on his, swallowing his groan.
Twisting their heads back and forth, noses bumping, tongues tangling, both lost to the lust rolling through their veins. Long, wet kisses consumed them as their hands grasped each other closely. The words of his grandfather resounded in his ears, pushing out the roar.
Gotta build it right, make sure the parts fit together, protect it…Damn.
He knew they could build something; knew they fit together, but he was not protecting her heart by lying to her.
As though in agony, Patrick pulled back, her mewl of discontent almost causing him to move right back in, continuing to kiss her until he knew he would flip her underneath him, taking her body the way he had imagined ever since seeing her at the pool.
His hands held her face in place as she attempted to move back in closer. “I…we…we can’t, Evie,” he panted. Pulling away from her took all his willpower, his hands shaking as they held her shoulders back away from him.
Evie, jolted from her lust-induced fantasy, looked askance as she realized her body was fighting to move back into his. Her hand touched her lips, still tingling from his assault. Blushing furiously, she attempted to jump off his lap. “I’m sorry, I—”
“No, no, babe, don’t you dare say you’re sorry,” he demanded, holding her in place. Lifting her chin with two of his fingers, he held her gaze. “You’ve got nothing to be sorry about. This was me…all me…and as much as I want you, I don’t want to fuck this up.”
A questioning expression crossed her face as she peered back at him. “Fuck what up, Patrick?”
“This…us…what we feel and what we’re building here.”
Shaking her head, silently expressing her misunderstanding, she waited as he pulled his thoughts together. He gently moved her off his lap and stood, beginning to pace her living room.
“Shit, fuck, Evie,” he said, stopping in front of the garden doors leading out to her deck, staring out into the night sky. Turning around, he saw her confused expression, doubt in her eyes. Stalking back over, he dropped to his knees, crouching in front of her, clasping her hands in his. “I’m sorry. I can’t lead you on like this. I gotta come clean.”
Sighing heavily, he continued, “Almost everything I’ve told you is the truth…I’m getting out of the Army in a couple of months, I’m dedicated to finding out what happened to that missing equipment, and I want to work with you to do that. But I can’t come in here and just charm the information out of you.” Licking his lips, he cupped her jaw. “I like you, Evie. I liked what I saw when you were out by the pool, then respected the woman I met in our first meeting. Everything about you makes me want to get to know you better…see if we fit…see if we can build something.”
She breathed in every word he said, cheering at the honesty, discovering he was as interested in her as she was in him…
but something’s holding him back.
Remaining quiet, she waited to see what was coming.
“The only thing I wasn’t honest about was what I’m doing when I get out.” His eyes darted back and forth between hers, searching for any reaction, finding none…other than caution. Sucking in a deep breath, he said, “My sister and her fiancé live in Virginia. So do my parents…when they aren’t vacationing in Florida.” He hesitated, seeing his explanation slowly dawn on her before he continued. “I…I’ve decided to move back to Virginia. I’m not certain what I’ll be doing there, but I want to be closer to family. My sister’s getting married and I want to be around her.”
Nodding in a way that seemed more expected than real, she silently glanced over his shoulder at the framed family photograph on her wall. Her dad, in his military uniform, with his arm proudly around her mom’s shoulders, Evie and her sister standing in front of them. Her dad’s other hand rested on her, pulling her gently back into his strength. The family was smiling…a real smile from something amusing and not fake from a photographer’s insistence.
He wants to be closer to his family.
“Evie?” he whispered.
Her eyes jerked back to his, nodding this time with more emotion. “Thank you…for um…well, thank you for being honest with me.”
“You’re upset?”
She watched the myriad of expressions cross his face.
Concern. Guilt. Hope.
Reaching out, she moved to cup his face before her fingers halted. “I have no right to be upset,” she said. “I…well, thank you.” Slipping away from him, she stood and moved to the kitchen. “Do you want another beer while we finish planning?”
Patrick dropped his chin to his chest, his heart heavy. He knew she was smart.
No sense in trying to build something that’ll just end in a couple of months anyway.
Heaving another huge sigh, he stood following her. “Sure, that’d be great.”
* * *
Lying in bed that night, Evie relived the evening’s ending.
Separating
from the sofa, they danced around each other, pretending the kiss of all kisses had not happened. They continued to discuss the problem and decided to talk with the truck driver that weekend. Patrick had shown concern about her going but she had been insistent. “I’ll make him feel less threatened,” she had claimed and in the end, Patrick agreed.
They also talked about the people she came in contact with on a daily basis at GMS, but it seemed that her range of contacts was minimal. “I’ll keep my ears and eyes open,” she promised and as he walked to the door, they stood awkwardly saying goodbye.
Finally, he nodded sadly as she stepped back and closed the door.
Now, hours later, she still could not sleep. Rolling over, she punched her pillow, huffing in frustration. Knowing sleep was not coming, she climbed out of bed, padding into the kitchen to make a cup of herbal tea. Once it steeped, she moved to the garden doors, stepping out onto her small deck overlooking the park near the back of the property.
Settling in one of the lounge chairs, she pulled her robe tighter around her, blocking out the spring coolness, and sipped her tea.
What’s really bothering me? The fact that I was falling for him, and now he’s beyond my reach? At least he was honest, telling me the truth before we went too far.
Her mind wrestled with the swirl of emotions, all vying for attention.
Patrick leaving in a couple of months to the other side of the country. Norman and Gary dismissing the possible theft, not wanting negative publicity. Saul, saying they were friends but seeming to want more. The new engineering job that would be hers in a couple of weeks.
Leaning back, she lifted her eyes toward the stars, feeling alone. Bone-wearyingly alone. Her mind drifted back the picture of her family and a small smile escaped amidst the turmoil.
I’m sorry dad. I never meant to imply that your Army career was bad…or not enough. I just hated moving, that’s all. It wasn’t easy for me to make friends.
Sighing deeply as she sipped the last of her tea, she felt her father’s presence as though his arms wrapped around her.
I want what you and mom had, dad. I want to wake up every morning, so happy to be beside the man in bed with me. I want him to look at me the way you looked at mom.
She leaned over, setting the mug on the table and walked to the railing, looking out over the peaceful night.
Maybe…if I had that…I would not be so afraid to step out of my comfort zone.
Walking inside, she set her mug in the sink and made her way back to bed. Sliding under her covers once more, she felt sleep begin to take her over the edge.
What could we have built together, Patrick?
she wondered, slipping into a deep sleep.
* * *
Miles away, in the pre-dawn morning, the sound of Patrick’s feet pounded a rhythm along the American River at Sutter’s Landing Park. Unable to sleep, he finally decided to sweat out the frustration coursing through his body.
After ending the kiss that rocked him to his soul, they continued to discuss the case as though the clench of the century had not just happened. Rounding a curve he slowed his pace, taking in the rising sun over the water.
Fuck! Why now? Why when I’m leaving, do I have to find someone I could see forever in her eyes?
Walking for another mile, his mind turned once more toward his grandfather.
Just because parts don’t fit, don’t mean they weren’t good parts. Sometimes when you’re building somethin’, things just don’t go together.
Making his way to his jeep in the parking lot, he climbed in and began the drive back to his apartment. Several minutes later, stepping into the hot shower, washing off the sweat, his mind continued to focus on Evie.
Damn, Granddad…I think these parts coulda fit together perfectly. Maybe I just need to work on them a little more.
With that thought giving him hope, he dressed proudly in his uniform, ready to face the challenges of a new day with renewed vigor.