Somewhere in Between (Madison Square #1) (20 page)

Chapter 18

Alex (Now)

I hadn’t heard from Drew since he left the bar Monday night. He was a no show for trivia, and my texts went unanswered. I paced the square a few times, debating whether I should just go over there, but I told him I would need some time. He was just giving me what I asked for, but it made me more desperate to see him.

By Saturday afternoon, I was excited because the boys were playing football in the park. Drew never missed football. I slipped on a cute strapless sundress and headed to the park.

When I got there, Drew was nowhere to be seen. David and Sean were already on the field, and Millie was quietly reading her pregnancy book.

“Hey, Millie.” She looked up at me from her book and gave me an awkward smile.

“Hey, Alex. You look nice,” she said with none of her usual spirit.

Something was up.

“Still no Drew?”

She looked out to the field. “No. He’s not coming.”

I could hear the discomfort in her voice, but I pressed anyway. I was desperate for answers. “Why?”

She sighed. “It is not my place. You need to talk to Drew.”

Were they already choosing sides? “So I guess he told you what happened,” I said, unable to meet her eyes.

She looked at me with a sad smile. “He talked to David. You know how we are.” David kept nothing from Millie. They were the textbook example of the perfect couple.

“Do you think I’m a total idiot?”

Millie looked back to the field where David was running toward the makeshift goal. “Did I ever tell you how I met David?”

“Yeah, you met in college.”

She laughed. “No, the real story.”

She had my attention now. I shook my head, waiting for her to explain.

“I was engaged to someone else,” she said. My eyes widened. Holy shit! Sweet, innocent Millie broke someone’s heart. I could never imagine that.

“His name was Brayden. We were high school sweethearts, had been dating since tenth grade. We had a plan. We were gonna go away to college together, graduate together, then law school, then the wedding, and happily ever after.” She sighed. “David was in Brayden’s fraternity. They met during pledge week. David was assigned to be Brayden’s big brother. Now you have to understand, I always played it safe. Never took a single risk. I stuck to the plan. Brayden took me to the house for some date party or some other theme, it’s not important. Anyway, David was there. Things started off the usual way, Brayden in his element, me trailing behind him or fading into the background. I was incredibly shy, and Brayden was always the center of attention.”

She took a deep breath. “I was fine letting him take the lead because I never knew anything different. He made all my decisions for me. Where we went, what I wore, even where I went to college. So, eventually Brayden left me, as he always did, to do God knows what with his friends. That’s when David came over to talk to me.”

Her face spread into an incredible smile as she thought back to when they first met. “He was hands down the most gorgeous man I had ever seen. He asked me if Brayden ditched me a lot, and I nodded. He offered to get me a drink and took a seat next to me. We didn’t say anything for a long time, just sat there sipping our drinks. Girls were coming up to him left and right, asking him to dance, trying to get his attention, but David didn’t budge. After a while he shook his head as he caught a glimpse of Brayden talking to some sorority girl. I was pretending not to notice.”

I gaped at her. Millie was sweet, sure, but she was no doormat. I couldn’t believe she would let someone treat her that way.

“So, there we were, still sitting in complete silence, when he leaned in and whispered that Brayden didn’t understand how lucky he was. I was a little taken back. I didn’t know what to say. I just stared at him. David smiled at me and brushed a strand of hair from my face. I felt more in that one touch than in the three years with Brayden. I asked David if he would take me home, and he agreed. He was such a gentleman. He drove me back to the dorm and walked me to the door. Then he told me something I would never forget. He said, ‘I hope that one day I am man enough to deserve someone like you, but I can tell you that Brayden never will be.’”

I couldn’t help but cheer for David in this story.

“At first,” she continued, “I was upset. I mean, who was he to judge my relationship? But then he took my hand and squeezed it and I knew he was right. Brayden was safe, he offered me security and a direction, but not real love or even respect. David added color to my world and made me see the possibilities. I had such a revelation in that one crazy moment that I just reacted and launched myself at him. I kissed him with everything I had. He was surprised at first, but gave in quickly and kissed me back. It was a life changing kiss in more ways than one. The next day, I broke it off with Brayden and changed my major to fashion, but kept my minor in business.”

“So, David is a homewrecker who went after someone else’s girl. I didn’t know he had it in him,” I said, looking out at him on the field.

Millie laughed. “I guess you could say that, but we didn’t get together until later. My point, Alex,” she said, turning to face me, “sometimes taking the risk, or the leap of faith, whatever you want to call it, can change your life for the better. Only God knows where I would be today if I never met David that night, but my life is full, and I don’t think I could be happier. It’s all because I had the guts to go for it.”

“Millie, he knows how I feel and he hasn’t said anything. I put myself out there, I took the leap, and fell flat on my face.”

Millie just gave me a sad smile.

When the game was over, Sean and David came over to help Millie with her stuff. They each said a quick goodbye. Millie gave me a hug. “You guys will work this out.”

I wasn’t so sure, but I promised her I was going to try. They packed up Millie’s chair and the cooler and headed to the car. Sean looked back at me with an apologetic smile. I didn’t know what to do, so I just sank down to the grass.

I couldn’t focus. I felt like my whole world was falling apart. It had been days since I’d seen or talked to Drew. The more I thought about it, the angrier I got. This wasn’t about giving me time to forgive him. Drew was avoiding me, and I was going to find out why.

Ten minutes later, I found myself standing in front of Drew’s door with no memory of exactly how I got there. I knocked. No answer. I knocked again. I heard something from behind the door.

“Drew, I know you are in there,” I said through the door. I heard the lock click and the door opened. He was barefoot and a little rumpled. I hated that my first thought was how incredible he looked with his t-shirt stretched across his broad chest and jeans hanging low on his hips. Damn it, focus! I was mad at him.

He took a step to the side to let me in. I went straight to the living room and dropped my stuff in the brown leather arm chair we bought from that estate sale last year. He didn’t say anything, not even a hello. He just stood there with his hands on his hips.

“Okay, I will start. Why are you avoiding me?”

He walked into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of scotch off the counter. “I’m not avoiding you.” He poured himself a glass. “You needed time.”

He walked back into the living room with his glass and casually leaned against the couch. The anger I felt before quickly faded to confusion. Why was he acting so cold?

“I didn’t mean for you to disappear,” I said quietly.

He threw back the rest of his drink and set the glass on the table next to the couch. “What do you want from me, Alex?” He crossed his arms across his chest.

“I-I want things to be like they were,” I said, my voice cracking.

“It can’t be like it was. Things are…” He exhaled a long breath. “Things are different.”

Tears welled up in my eyes. This was it. He was saying it was over. I should’ve never said anything. I should’ve just dealt with it myself. I got caught up in that story Millie told me about following your heart, only to have it ripped from my chest. My biggest fear was losing him and it looked like that was exactly what was going to happen. I wish I knew what to say to make him reconsider, but I guess some people just don’t get their happy ending.

“Drew, I know things have been tense with us, but we can get past it.” I was desperate. “You are too important to me. I love you. Even though you don’t feel the same way, I can’t—”

“Goddamn it, Alex. Stop telling me how I feel!” He yelled. “I don’t want to get past it.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Stop assuming you know what I want.”

I took a step back. “What do you want?”

He crossed the room, stopping just in front of me with a dark, crazy look in his eyes. Then he grabbed the back of my neck and crashed his lips to mine.

My world stopped. I forgot everything I came there to say and instantly responded, pressing my body as close to his as I could get. I was running on pure instinct. His hands and his lips urged me on and set fire to my resolve to get over him.

This was a game changing kiss. Hot and passionate. Two words I’ve never used to describe Drew before, but the taste of him, the smell of his skin, the warm buzzing that raced its way through my body told the same story. No other man would ever compare to him. I was ruined.

He walked me backward until I was pressed to the wall. I responded, wrapping my arms around his neck as his tongue searched for access to my mouth. I was lost in his taste. A little scotch, a little honey, and all Drew.

He kissed me harder, biting down on my bottom lip as I cried out. It felt incredible. The sharp sting of his teeth followed by the soft caress of his tongue made me weak at the knees. His body was hard and toned in all the places where mine was soft, making us fit seamlessly together. There was no telling where he ended and I began.

Everywhere he kissed me, sparks of electricity shot through my body, making my skin feel alive and sensitive. He kissed his way down my neck and shoulder, paying close attention to the sensitive spot behind my ear as I breathed his name.

I ran my hands down his back, frantically searching for the hem of his shirt. He groaned as my fingertips met the warm skin just above the waistband of his jeans. I tugged at his shirt and he pulled away, his lips leaving mine just long enough to reach over his shoulder and pull the shirt over his head.

We were only inches apart, breathing each other in as I ran my fingers over his sculpted abs and chest. I wanted to commit every inch of him to my memory in case this was the only time I would get to see him so full of lust and fire. It felt surreal, like a fantasy sequence from a movie. I was afraid if I blinked, the moment would be gone and I would find myself still sitting on the grass in the park, trying to work up the courage to confront him.

With a sexy half smile, he leaned in and brushed his lips softly against mine, causing a moan to escape my lips. I was trying not to think too hard, but questions swirled in my head, then disappeared again as his tongue parted my lips and his kisses became more demanding.

There were so many reasons not to give in, not to let this go further, but I didn’t care anymore. I’d reached my breaking point. I’d humiliated myself over this man. I’d risked everything to tell him I love him. I couldn’t stop myself anymore. I wanted him desperately. I was done worrying about what could happen to our friendship, to our little makeshift family. All I wanted right then was more of his lips, his hands, more of him.

He wrapped his arms around my waist and spun me quickly, pressing my back to his chest and his lips to my neck as he kissed his way down to my shoulder. I leaned back into him as his hand moved from my stomach up to my chest.

One hand closed around my breast with a gentle squeeze as he tugged on the back of my dress, pulling down the zipper with the other. He slowly pushed the dress to the floor and his hands followed the soft fabric as it slid down my body. He bit my ear lobe, sucking it into his warm mouth. He slipped his hand under the delicate lace of my panties and into the slick folds between my legs.

“Tell me you want this,” he whispered.

I couldn’t speak or think when his fingers made contact with my clit. Pure pleasure rocketed through me as he worked his fingers in slow, punishing circles, intensifying the ache that had been building between my thighs since the moment his lips touched mine. My body tightened and begged for release as his fingers continued their assault on my sex.

“I need to hear you say it, Red.” He pressed a kiss to my neck and slipped one long finger inside me. I moaned, arching my back as I felt his lips spread into a wicked smile against my neck. “You like that,” he whispered, his breath hot in my ear.

I was beyond words at this point. I couldn’t respond if I wanted to.

“Say it, Red,” he whispered, gently nibbling on my earlobe. His fingers continued their slow torture. I was so close. I moaned his name, begging for him to get me there.

“Tell me you want me and I will make you come.” He pressed his thumb hard to my clit. I saw stars. The added pressure had me so close, I could taste it.