Something Real (45 page)

“Benny?”

He, Matt, and Kirk are in a heated discussion. Kirk’s voice rises higher: “Fine, I told Kaye you’re gay. You know what?
Nobody
cares!”

“You piece of
shit
.”

For a second we turn, surprised at where this comes from. Lexie™ is standing next to the van, her arms crossed, glaring at Kirk.

“Lexie™?” I think Mom meant to say this in a you’re-in-big-trouble kind of way, but it comes out more as a question. It’s like she’s finally realizing that she doesn’t know any of us.

“Beth, we need to get on the road
now
.” Chuck’s standing next to two suitcases—mine and Benny’s. “Give the kids their bags, and you can sort this out after you have a nice, relaxing time on the cruise.”

Mom’s face is pale as she looks at our suitcases. “But I can’t just go when—”

“They’re adults now, Beth. They’ve made their choice. Let’s all take a breather, and we’ll talk when we come back,” Kirk says.

I’m dimly aware of the tide of Vultures receding; school security has finally got them under control. It’s quiet again.

“Mom, I’m sor—” I start, but her voice slices through the air.

“Don’t talk to me,” she says.

She climbs into the front seat of the van and slams the door. My siblings look at Benny and me, their expressions ranging from confusion to terror. Lex comes up to me, and the most shocking thing of all happens—she gives me a hug.

“You’re insane, but I love you.” She hugs Benny. “You too.” When she pulls away, her eyes are dry, but there’s disappointment in them. “That doesn’t mean I’m not going on a free cruise.”

I smile. “Get some sun for me?”

“Yeah.”

Chuck shoos her back into the van, then narrows his eyes at me. “Do you remember what I told you?”

“Yeah, I remember.” My voice is edged with barely contained contempt.

“Okay, then.”

Bastard.

Chuck gets into the third van with Lacey Production Assistant on his heels, and the last MetaReel camera slowly edges backward, the lens still trained on Benny and me. Confetti litters the sidewalk, and students stand around the area, staring unabashedly. Benny, Patrick, Matt, and I are in the middle of it, staring down the camera.

The vans start up and then they’re gone.

“Well,” Benny says, “that’s a wrap.”

*   *   *

“Chloe. Put down the packing tape.” Mer is holding one of the wine coolers she filched from her mother’s stock in one hand and a box of brownie bites in the other. It is so weird to see her standing in my bedroom.

“Mer, I don’t care that it’s my birthday. Seriously. What if they come back early? I need to—”

She gives me an arch look. “Okay, fine. I know when my powers of persuasion aren’t enough.” She turns and yells down the hall. “Patrick, she won’t stop. It’s your turn now.”

“They’re back?”

Patrick and Tessa had gone into town to pick up Chinese takeout for all of us while Benny and I packed.

I hear Patrick come up the stairs, and Mer holds up her hands. “These will be downstairs for you.”

I give her a wan smile. “Thanks, Mer.”

“Yeah, yeah.” She winks and steps aside for Patrick to come into the room. He shuts the door behind him and immediately gathers me into his arms.

“I got your favorite,” he murmurs. “And cheesecake might be involved, too.”

“Thanks,” I mumble against his chest.

He looks around the room. “You got a lot done.”

I nod. “Well, there are thirteen kids. Someone’s gonna want their own room.”

He smooths back my hair and looks down at me. “Not your problem. So.”

He reaches up to turn off the overhead light. The room suddenly feels less empty. My desk lamp is dim and casts an orange glow. “I hear I’m supposed to convince you to come downstairs.”

I shiver as his fingers travel down my arms. “Um. This won’t convince me to
ever
leave this room.”

“Hmm. How do you feel about cold Chinese food?”

I pull him to the bed. “Sounds delicious.”

Half an hour later, we manage to get downstairs. As soon as we walk into the kitchen, Tessa rolls her eyes.

“I told you it was a bad idea to send
Patrick
up there.”

I scowl at her and put my tangled hair into a messy bun. “I had a box to finish packing.”

She stuffs an eggroll into her mouth. “Uh-huh.”

Benny shoots Patrick a look, and he shakes his head. “I don’t break my promises.”

“What promises?” asks Mer.

“Nothing,” I say. My face grows warm as I pile orange chicken and fried rice onto plates for us. I decide not to mention how close we’ve gotten to breaking that promise.

“Ohhh,” says Mer, knowingly. She gives Patrick a sympathetic look. “Bet you wish you’d never agreed to
that
.”

Patrick raises his hands. “No comment.”

“
Anyway
,” I say. “Thanks for coming over, guys.”

“It’s your birthday!” Mer says. She hands me a wine cooler, then lifts hers up. “To Chloe and Ben’s independence day!”

“Hell, yeah,” says Matt.

Tessa moans after she takes a long swig. “I have drunk Asian face, don’t I?”

I take in her bright red cheeks and nod. “But it’s cute.”

“
Ugh
.” She shoves her wine cooler away and fills a glass with water.

There’s cheesecake and presents and a tipsy tour of the house. It’s strange to be here with my friends, with Patrick. To walk around without cameras. It feels empty, cavernous. In all my life, I’ve never been home when there weren’t at least eight people around—I don’t know what I’m going to do without the chaos. I know I complain about them a lot, but I do love my family. There’s something special about living in a house that hums with the energy of so many people. It’s certainly never boring. I’m sure I’ll love the quiet of Tessa’s home at first, but I can already feel the creeping loneliness that’s only going to grow each month as we get closer to graduation. Where will I live when Benny and Tessa go off to college?

“Penny for your thoughts?” asks Tessa, linking her arm through mine.

We’re in the basement now, and the guys are playing foosball. I check my phone, just to make sure my mom didn’t call. Nope. Two missed calls from Lex, one from Farrow™, one from Dad.

“Just thinking about how I’m going to be a lonely old cat lady living all by myself someday,” I say.

Tessa shakes her head. “Not if Patrick has anything to do with it.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

I watch my boyfriend score a goal with expert precision. Is there anything he’s not good at?

“Chlo, that boy has
forever
written all over his face when he looks at you. A cat lady you shall never be.”

I wish that made me feel better, but it doesn’t. Everything is going to change this fall.
Everything
.

The grandfather clock in the living room chimes eleven, and people start getting ready to go. Tomorrow is, after all, a school day. One that Benny and I have every intention of skipping. There is a certain amount of satisfaction in knowing I can write a note to excuse myself.

“You’re sure you don’t want to sleep at my place tonight?” Tessa asks as she puts on her All-Stars.

I run my hand along the mantel with the thirteen pictures. Will they keep ours up?

“Yeah, but thanks. We’ll be there tomorrow. I want one more night to … you know.”

She gives me a hug. “Happy birthday, friend.”

Patrick and I linger out by his car long after everyone has gone. Benny’s inside, taking a shower.

“I wish I could stay over,” he says, holding me against him. “I really hate the idea of you sleeping all alone tonight.”

I’m so drained and buzzed and broken, I know I’ll fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow. Still, it’d be nice to be in his arms.

“Why can’t you have parents who want to be cool and let you spend the night at your girlfriend’s house?”

He chuckles. “Yeah, my parents would definitely not be down with that.”

“I am so tired of rules,” I mutter.

He kisses my forehead. “Good thing we’re gonna graduate soon.”

“Yeah.”

“Happy birthday.”

He gives me a long, lingering kiss and then gets into his car. As I watch him drive away, the enormity of what Benny and I have done and the horrible scene outside school hits me all over again.

I’m finally free of
Baker’s Dozen
. So why do I feel as bad as ever?

www.celeb.com

BREAKING NEWS:

Bonnie™ and Benton™ Baker Leave
Baker’s Dozen

BY HAUTE COCOA

Oh, cast of
Baker’s Dozen,
how I love you. Whenever I feel like complaining about my family, I just have to TiVo
yours
and, suddenly, I feel better.

I don’t know why last night’s news that Bonnie™ and Benton™ Baker have
moved out
and quit the cast of
Baker’s Dozen
is such a shocker. HELLO! Did anyone else see the
diary episode
or watch the
Kaye Gibbons fiasco
? Unfortunately, Mama Bear still doesn’t get why B&B said sayonara. “My heart is broken,” tweeted Beth Baker-Miller. But that didn’t stop her from going on a
cruise to
Mexico
.

I swear,
Baker’s Dozen
is America’a answer to the
telenovela.
The drama never stops! Not only have B&B moved in with BFF
Tessa Lee
, they’re
planning to go to court
, too. Rumor has it that the two reality TV stars are
suing MetaReel
for damages, including unpaid wages and defamation of character.
¡Ai ai ai!

“My clients have the right to privacy and to be paid for the work they have done,” said their lawyer,
Melinda Greenberg
. Not only that, they’ll be helping out the ACLU with their lawsuit against MetaReel. I heart the drama!

No doubt MetaReel producer
Chuck Daniels
is pissed—and not just because he has a
mullet
. Hey, Chuck, 1981 called—it wants its hairstyle back!

This is what Chuckie said about the show’s future: “We’re reevaluating if it makes sense to keep on doing the show. This came out of left field.”

Oh,
hell
no! You can’t cancel—how else will I know that my family is relatively normal? And what would I do without Beth’s
televised Botox treatments
? One thing’s for sure:
Baker’s Dozen
is more exciting than ever.

Tell celeb.com what you think:

Sour Grapes: Bonnie™ and Benton™ are totally overreacting.

Just Deserts: MetaReel deserves to pay through the nose. Viva B&B!