Authors: Campbell Armstrong
She headed for the front door. She was already stepping into the car when she saw Rhees appear in the driveway. She backed out. He had a hand raised in the air, a gesture that meant stop, but she didn't.
She thought, John, try and understand me. You don't belong in my world. She wasn't even sure she belonged in it herself any more. She wasn't sure if she still had the maps to it, if she understood the grids and interstices, or if she was rushing back in the direction of the same head-numbing sickness that had almost engulfed her before.
She drove out of the cul-de-sac, thinking about the last words of Isabel's letter.
you know sumtin?
this protection thing
it just dont work
33
Dansk, in baseball cap and dark shades, picked up his cellular phone on the first ring and heard Pasquale say, âShe just left.'
Dansk said, âI'll be in touch.'
He was parked outside a Taco Bell. He waited until the red VW appeared, then slid out of the parking-lot and cruised into traffic behind Amanda. The vehicle he drove was an anonymous Buick he'd picked up an hour ago from Budget. He believed in changing cars frequently as a matter of general strategy. He always went for mid-size cars in boring greys or dark blues with unmemorable wheels.
Headlines formed in his brain.
FORMER PROSECUTOR KILLED IN FREAK ACCIDENT
. You couldn't just bribe a crane-operator to drop a 6-ton slab of concrete on somebody's car. Here's a suggestion for you, lady: why don't you just drive across this construction site and under the crane with the big slab on the hook?
Then he thought,
EX-PROSECUTOR DISAPPEARS LEAVING MYSTERIOUS NOTE
.
I'm going away, I can't take it any more, forgive me
. But Amanda Scholes wasn't the kind who disappeared.
She was heading towards central Phoenix, high-rises in the distance, craggy brown peaks beyond. Please be doing something perfectly normal: going to the bank, the supermarket, picking up your dry-cleaning. Your everyday activities.
He was still pondering the fact that she'd called his hotel late last night, ostensibly to give him a phone number, but in reality
checking up
on him, which told you something about the way her mind worked. And he was still thinking about her trip to see Sanchez. She picked at fabrics just to see if they'd unravel. Pick, pick, pick.
Oh, lady. Let it be.
Downtown, clouds had lifted, traffic was snarled, drivers hung their shirtsleeved arms out of windows. Cigarettes were smoked, fingers tapped on side-panels. He could see her VW half a block away, stuck like he was. He took off the baseball cap. It was making his scalp itch.
Traffic moved again. The VW made a right turn. Dansk, six cars behind, followed. He wished he had a mask to filter out the fumes that hung in the air.
Amanda had found a parking space and was backing into it. Dansk drove past, reached a busy intersection, made an illegal U-turn and drove back past the VW.
Now Amanda was moving along the sidewalk. She ran a hand through her hair and Dansk thought, Rhees ought to give her a fine brush and comb for Christmas. Silver hair-clasps and a partridge in a pear tree.
He had to find a place to leave the Buick. He entered an alley clogged with cars, then he turned left and slipped the car into a metered space between a U-Haul truck and a busted-up old AMC Pacer with Nevada plates. He locked the Buick. Amanda was about 50 or 60 yards away. She wasn't looking his way. She wasn't looking at anything in particular. She was focussed inward. She was dressed in jeans, white shirt and bleached-out sneakers.
In the French restaurant she'd looked smart and alive and attractive. She had the kind of sexiness that comes with maturity. A woman who knew all the points of the compass on her lover's body. Dansk wondered what she'd been like at seventeen and if he might have lusted after her. Probably.
No,
definitely
. Fucking the younger Amanda. Burying your face between her breasts and her hard darkened nipples in your mouth. Your cock inside her, and yeah, she's coming, she's coming in a noisy way, and you're beginning to feel your own derrick crank, and the geyser is rushing from deep inside you, and she's digging her fingernails into your spine and you can't get your tongue
deep enough
inside her mouth. You want it all, you want to consume her, your tongue all the way down inside her womb, and she's saying, oh oh oh, Anthony, oh, Anthony, and her whole body starts trembling and it's oh ah, God, oh, Anthony, Anthoneee,
do me, do me, do, don't stop, fuck my brains out
.
He could see all this. Smell it.
Slow down, Anthony. The key is detachment.
She paused on the sidewalk, reached inside her hip pocket and removed a couple of sheets of paper. Something in the way she held them struck him as interesting. Tight, possessive, as if they were important to her. From this distance, they looked like nothing more than some sheets ripped from a notebook. Maybe they were insignificant, a shopping list, say, reminders she'd written for herself. Things to do. But why clutch them like they were the secret key to a dead language?
Then one of the sheets slid suddenly from her fingers and a very faint breeze fluttered it along the sidewalk. She reached down quickly to pick it up, but the breeze tugged it beyond her and she went after it with a slight panicky movement, pushing her way forcefully past pedestrians, then trapping it beneath the sole of her foot. When she lifted the foot the paper blew away again, this time coming to rest under a parked car. She went on her knees, groped around, retrieved it, and in a crouching position smoothed the sheet against her thigh. She had an expression of relief on her face, a little half smile.
She remained motionless for a few seconds, as if she were trying to reach a decision. Which she apparently did, because she folded the sheets and stuck them back in her hip pocket and then continued to walk.
The way she'd gone down on her knees to pick up the fallen sheet intrigued him. Whatever the papers were, you could dismiss the idea of shopping lists. Something else, something important to her.
She reached the Federal Building and went inside.
The Federal Building. Well, well. He loitered among pedestrians.
A mime approached, white-faced, a yellow helium balloon attached to a string in his gloved hand. He eyed Dansk a second, then changed direction abruptly and wandered away. Dansk had a serious contempt for these pests. Their plastic flowers that squirted water, the way they pretended they were walking against a storm. There ought to be a law against these assholes, and while you're at it another against former prosecutors who couldn't mind their own goddam business.
34
Lew Bascombe was crossing the lobby towards the elevators. Amanda called out his name and he turned.
âThe bad penny again,' he said.
âThanks for arranging the meeting,' she said.
âI trust it was fruitful,' Bascombe said.
âIt was fine.'
âDoes that mean I can look forward to some peace?'
She laid a hand on his arm. âOne last question, Lew.'
She looked across the lobby. Federal workers went back and forth carrying files and briefcases. An armed guard at the metal detector was quietly whistling âDanny Boy'.
She said, âYou told me before that you'd passed Isabel Sanchez and Reuben Galindez along to agents from the Program. Right?'
Bascombe nodded his head in a tired way.
âUS Marshals, right?'
âNo,' Bascombe said. âSS storm troopers.'
She wasn't in the mood. âHow many Marshals?'
âThat's three questions, Amanda. I'm counting. You said you had one.'
âPlease, Lew.'
Bascombe said, âHow many Marshals. I can't answer that.'
âBut they showed you ID?'
âAmanda, what the hell is your problem? You blackmail me into fixing you up with a meeting with a Program official, which I do. Why didn't you ask him any questions you had?'
âI'm asking you, Lew.'
Bascombe drew her to one side, away from the elevator doors. âThis has got to stop, Amanda.'
âWhat did they show you, Lew?'
âThey have a docket, stamped and authorized. I check the docket against a duplicate supplied to me by Arlington. If it matches, that's good enough.'
âThey could be fake papers,' she said.
âI wish I had some kind of stuff in a canister I could spray on you. Send you into a temporary coma. As it is, I have half a mind to get the security people to toss you out on the street.' Bascombe pressed the call button.
Amanda said, âThe whole system sounds porous to me.'
Bascombe shook his head. âThe dockets have to match exactly. There's also a one-off code-number for each case, which is highly confidential. These are the safeguards.'
âOK. They show you papers. Do you accompany the Marshals when they pick up the witnesses, Lew? Make sure it all goes smoothly?'
âThe logistics change from case to case, for security reasons. I'm not getting into that area, Amanda.'
She stared at Bascombe. The rug on his skull looked a little maladjusted today.
âTell me one thing, Lew. Are you straight?'
âStraight?'
âOr are you crooked?'
âI don't think I follow,' Bascombe said.
You don't have the face and your hair's wrong too, she thought. You are what you are, a pencil-pusher with a house in the suburbs and two point something kids.
âForget I ever asked, Lew,' she said.
Bascombe said, âNow watch, Amanda. See me step inside this elevator. Imagine me rising to my tiny chamber upstairs where I like to be left alone. Got the picture?' He entered the elevator and the doors slid shut.
She turned and walked out of the building and back into the sunny street. She strolled through the crowds. She had a sense of being a cork afloat on an unpredictable tide. She felt the sun on her face and cold in her bones and indecision in her heart.
She moved across the street. She walked to the next intersection where she paused outside a drugstore. She patted her hip pocket, as if to reassure herself that Isabel's letter was still there.
Give it to Dansk. Take it to him now. You're wasting your time, burning up energy
. She removed the two sheets, thinking how flimsy they were, feeling the cheapness of the paper, then she stuck them back inside the pocket and walked to a pay phone. She called the Phoenix PD and asked for Willie Drumm. She'd discuss the letter with Willie. He'd know what to do. He'd advise her.
She was informed that he was out of the office. Call back again in an hour or so. She hung up.
She stepped out of the phone booth and the glass door swung and trapped in reflection the face of a man several yards along the sidewalk, and for a moment she wasn't sure if she should turn and walk away. Then she thought, What the hell.
35
Dansk, stunned when he saw her step out of the phone booth and move towards him, squeezed out a smile.
âAmanda,' he said, âthis is a surprise.'
He was furious with the way he'd allowed himself to be bushwhacked. Your concentration slips a second and suddenly you're on the defensive, only you can't show it, you have to work to keep it out of your expression
and
your tone of voice, and this effort
grinds
inside your head.
âI had some business downtown,' he said. âYou too?'
âNothing serious,' she answered. âA chore, that's all.'
Nothing serious, he thought, just a trip to the Federal Building. âYou got time for a coffee?'
âToo busy with this and that. Sorry.'
âYou were meant to be smelling the flowers, Amanda.'
âI'm getting round to it.'
Dansk took off his shades. âYou have to catch them at the right time. Summer goes and before you know it, it's Fall.'
âThen it's dark old winter,' she said.
Dark old winter. You got it, lady. âI had the impression you were going off to that cabin you mentioned.'
âAre you in some kind of hurry to see me leave by any chance, Anthony?' she asked.
âHurry?' Don't push this, he thought. She's smart enough to sense any urgency in you. âI just thought you were heading out of town, that's all.'
âI'll go tonight probably,' she said. âTomorrow morning at the latest. Have you been to see Sanchez yet?'
âI'm expecting a report any moment.'
âYou're not interviewing him yourself?'
âSomebody else does that.'
âYou don't do interviews,' she said. âYou don't have the knack for knowing when somebody's bullshitting you.'
âNo, I'm not saying I don't have the knack. It's just the way it works. Division of labour.'
She moved a few yards down the sidewalk and Dansk went along with her. âHow did you get into this line of work anyway, Anthony?' she asked.
âThrough various channels,' he said.
âYou're a load of information.'
âIt's a habit.'
âSecrecy, you mean.'
âIt's a lifestyle you get used to.'
âSome might say it's a strange lifestyle, Anthony.'
Dansk said, âIt's not what you'd call a sociable occupation. It's not the kind of thing where you have office Christmas parties and company barbecues.'
âSounds quite lonely,' she said.
He hadn't meant to give an impression of loneliness. He hadn't meant to reveal anything of himself.
âThe work has compensations,' he said. âI'm doing some good.'
âSomething for society.'
âWe provide a service. We work in the shadows so people like yourself can put criminals where they belong. I believe in my work.'
âI don't doubt it, Anthony. You have a purposeful air about you.'
She looked directly at him. He understood he was being assessed somehow. He didn't like the frankness in her gaze. For a second he had the impression years had been stripped from her face and he was seeing her as she might have been in her early twenties, cheek-bones less well-fleshed, an absence of those tiny lines around the corners of her grey-blue eyes, the eyes themselves bright with the future.