Shifting Gears (19 page)

But she was already gone, racing out the door and away from Grady Hart and the horrible realization that, once again, she'd grown dependent on someone to take care of her instead of doing it for herself.

And in the process, both of them had failed.

Chapter 17

“You're a fuckwit, Grady.”

At least no one could ever accuse Kerri of mincing words.

Grady pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed into the phone. “I know.”

After Annabelle had left the garage earlier that afternoon, the rest of the guys had filled him in on exactly what had happened with Dobson, then made it pretty clear what they thought of Grady's reaction. Bit had been angry enough to tell Grady
I don't want to see your face around here for a while,
and Grady had agreed.

He didn't want to look at himself for a while, either. He
was
a fuckwit. So he'd gone upstairs and packed up his things, but before he left, he tried to call Annabelle.

Her phone went straight to voicemail.

On the way out, he'd tried to stop at Ranger's office, but Ranger wouldn't talk to him, either. Wouldn't even look at him. So he'd gone to Mom's and confessed all, and she'd told him that she hadn't seen Annabelle around for some time, and that he'd made a big mess that he needed to clean up.

He'd said the same thing to her that he'd just said to Kerri.

I know.

But how was he supposed to do that when he couldn't even find Annabelle? By the time he'd gotten home, all her stuff was gone from his house. All of it. Right down to the strands of red hair that seemed to collect daily in his shower drain.

That had hurt.

He was moping on the couch when the phone rang, and he'd picked up all frantic and eager, thinking it might be Annabelle. Instead, he'd got called a fuckwit.

Well deserved.

“You're not supposed to agree with me, you know. You have to argue with me so that I can yell at you some more,” Kerri huffed.

“I'm sorry. I just … that's all I can say, Kerri.” He let out a ragged breath.

“I'm not the one you need to tell that to,” came her reply, but her voice had softened.

He gave a harsh laugh. “Believe me, I've been trying. I've been trying to call her all afternoon. I went out to Mom's to see if she'd been there. But I can't find her, and I don't know where else she would have gone except for a hotel or something, and how am I going to find which one she's in? I am sorry. Fuck, I've never been more sorry, but I can't find her and it's killing me—
killing
me—that I can't apologize to the woman I love for hurting—”

There was a gasp, and then Kerri practically shouted, “You
love
her?”

Shit. He hadn't even realized it until he said it, but …

“Yeah.” Goddamn this hurt. “I do. I love her. I didn't mean to mess it up so bad. I just—shit, I was so high on the possibility of that deal and I kept thinking she'd give me a sign if she wanted me to stand up for her…” He trailed off and ran a hand through his hair. “I was an asshole and I don't think I can ever make it up to her. But I can't even find her to
try.
”

“So … you're not going to try to grovel to Dobson?”

“
What?
” Grady reared back from the phone for a bit, blinking. “You-you actually thought I would want to work with that asshole after the way he treated her? Who do you think I am?”

Kerri was quiet for a second, and then she said something he hadn't expected. “I know who you are. But I don't think you've quite accepted it yet.”

That threw him for a loop. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, I think you're the best brother a girl could have. I think you're loyal to a fault. I mean, look how many years you hung on and stayed in a job you hated and that brought you a shit ton of stress, just to look out for us and help the family. You're a really great person, Grady. But I don't think you knew that until you met Annabelle. And even then, I wasn't sure you'd accepted it.”

“I'd never choose a deal over Annabelle, though. I'd never choose anything or any
one
over her.” He couldn't resist teasing his sister, though. “Not even you.”

Kerri snorted so loudly that the phone rattled. “You're impossible. But I'm glad to hear it.”

“I love her,” he repeated, shaking his head at how much of a fool he'd been.

An exasperated sound reached his ears, and then Kerri told him, “She's at my place.”

Annabelle was at Kerri's?

Thank God.
Grady jumped up immediately. “Shit, Kerri. Thank you. I'll be right—”

“Do
not
come over here, though!” Her protest stopped him in his tracks, frowning.

“What? Why not? I need to tell her that I—”

“No, you don't. Right now, you
need
to give her some space. She's told me some things about her life and her dreams, and before you come in here and drop a love bomb, she needs to feel like she can answer you as an equal, and not as someone who's dependent on you. Even though you still need to prove to her that you're dependable by telling her what you just told me. That Dobson is a shit-for-brains who deserves to be castrated with a dull axe.”

“Uh…” He recoiled at the imagery.

But Kerri didn't bother taking back her words. “She needs to feel like she has a choice, either way. Which means you have to give her some time.”

He did
not
like that. “But I need to apologize. I need to tell her I love her.”

Kerri laughed so loudly that it was hard not to be offended. “So what? Listen to yourself.
I need this
and
I need that.
If you love her, you'll make sure she has what she needs before pushing yourself on her like that.”

Fuck. Kerri was right.

He'd told Annabelle that she was strong and that he hoped she got what she wanted, but here he was thinking only about how she made
his
life complete. How being with her made him feel good, like he was a man worth something even if he didn't have a deal with Dobson.

“What do I do, then?” He felt so lost.

“Nothing. She's leaving for Lee's race tomorrow—and you're not coming along, by the way.”

“But—”

“No, Grady. You do
nothing.
This time, you let her take control of her life, make her own decisions, and stand up for herself.” Kerri paused, then added, “And if she's as smart as I think she is, she'll realize that you're the best thing that ever happened to her.”

Grady sank back down onto the couch. “Thanks, sis.”

“You're welcome.”

But before Kerri could hang up, Grady blurted out, “Could you just tell her one thing for me?”

“Maybe. What is it?”

“Tell her I'll be watching the race on Friday and I'm counting on her to kick some ass.”

Kerri laughed. “Now that's a message I'll be happy to deliver.”

*   *   *

“Yeah!” Lee punched his fist in the air and let out a whoop as everyone in the pit went wild. The race had just ended with a photo finish, and they'd had to wait for a bit for the results, but the announcement had just come up that Lee had won.

By one one-thousandth of a second.

Annabelle had been biting her nails while the footage was reviewed, praying and hoping that they would come back with a victory for Hart Racing. Not because she wanted the glory. But because Kerri had told her that Grady was watching, and that he was counting on her.

Him, counting on
her.

She missed him. She hadn't seen him in almost three days, and the way she missed him hurt so bad … she'd never known pain like this. Even when Donnie had left her, it hadn't hurt this bad. When Kerri had told her what he'd said, she'd wanted to go to him and tell him that she was so sorry for running out like that and not giving him a chance to explain.

It had taken her a while to process it, but she realized that she'd run because of her own problems—because she hadn't stood her ground as soon as Grady had arrived and instead she'd expected him to take over and fight her battles. She'd waited for him to stand up for her instead of her standing up for herself, and that—more than anything else—had scared her. All her alarms had started going off, all her misgivings about trust and dependency and everything she hadn't realized she even had alarms about.

And she'd run like the coward she was.

Which was exactly why she
hadn't
gone to him that very day and begged his forgiveness. First, she needed to prove that she could be brave for
herself.
She needed to be her own best asset and her greatest protector. Grady did so much for her, but it wasn't fair to tell him that she could fight her own battles and then turn around and hide behind him as soon as he showed up.

No, she needed to do a few important things first, before she told him that she was sorry.

That she loved him.

She wasn't sure what would happen after that. If he was going to suck up to Dobson after all that, then she might simply have to love him from a distance.

But at the moment, he was counting on her to kick some ass, and she was going to deliver.

Chapter 18

Grady had come into the office early that day.

Like a fool.

He'd hoped that Annabelle would come in early so that he could talk to her.

Then again, he'd hoped she would come see him after her flight got in yesterday, but she didn't. He'd hoped she would call him after bringing Lee to that amazing win on Friday.

But she didn't.

Had he made a mistake? Should he have gone after her last week, despite the advice Kerri had given him? Should he even still believe there was a chance to make things right?

Was she not coming in today because she was
avoiding
him?

Damn it. The mere thought gutted him. Maybe he should just go home and try to forget everything. He could look into getting an office somewhere else so that Annabelle wouldn't have to run into him every day, and after a while maybe it wouldn't be so hard to see her again. He was out of the racing world, anyway—at least in a professional capacity. Ranger was covering the team management now that Annabelle was the full-time crew chief. There was no real reason why he had to stick around the Hart Racing offices.

And it wasn't like he was getting any work done today, anyway.

It was a quarter past nine. He'd wait for five more minutes. Five minutes, and then he'd admit defeat and leave.

He was staring at the clock … 9:17 … 9:18 … she still hadn't arrived … when the phone rang.

He didn't recognize the number on the caller ID. He was tempted to ignore it, but a part of him held out hope that maybe it was Annabelle, calling from a different number.

He picked up the handset. “Grady Hart.”

“Mr. Hart. This is Kevin Shankar from Celestial Motors.”

Grady's brain took a second to process that it wasn't Annabelle. But when he realized who it was instead …

Oh. Shit.

While Dobson was the biggest subcontracting auto manufacturer in the country, Celestial was a very close second, and had been growing steadily for the past five years.

“Mr. Shankar. Of course. I—what can I do for you this morning?”

The other man got straight to the point. “I heard a rumor that a certain executive got up to his well-known old tricks with one of your employees, and that you turned down a deal because of it.”

Damn, word traveled fast. Grady
had
turned down the deal. He had written to Dobson—but it wasn't a letter of apology. It was a letter stating that Carbon Works would not be doing business with U.S. Classic Auto, but that Grady hoped Dobson got all that he deserved from the industry in the future.

Still, he hadn't expected that to be anyone's knowledge but his and Dobson's. Who had told Shankar that? And why was Shankar now calling to tell Grady about it?

Grady tried to hedge a little to figure out what Shankar wanted. “Well, uh … she's not technically my employee.”

That was all he was willing to say. If Shankar wanted to know who the woman was, too bad. Grady wasn't willing to breach Annabelle's privacy.

But Shankar apparently didn't care about that, anyway. “Either way, I heard about what went down and wanted to reach out. Since it sounds like things with Dobson aren't going to go through, I'm wondering if you might be willing to let my team look at your muffler design. It's possible we might be able to do a deal.”

What?
For a moment, Grady was stunned. Shankar wanted to do a deal with him because of what he'd heard about how Dobson had treated Annabelle?

“I'm sorry, Mr. Shankar. I mean, yes, that would be great, but I'm also confused. Why are you calling me about this now? Because of what happened, I mean?”

The reply was short and matter-of-fact. “Anyone who's willing to turn down a deal with Dobson to defend what's right is a guy I want to do business with.”

Oh. Well. Shit.

He hadn't even been the one to do it. Not when it had counted.
Annabelle
had done that. She'd defended what was right, and Grady had just followed her like he always did. Like he always would, in the end. He loved and respected and admired her.

He owed it all to her. She was worth following.

“At any rate, I'll have my assistant contact your team and get something on the calendar. I'm looking forward to meeting you, Mr. Hart.”

When Grady hung up the phone, he looked at the clock. His five minutes were long up.

Time to head out for a while, go home, and regroup.