She's Out of Control (29 page)

“What?” I say, like his mother. “Is it my sweatpants?”

He pulls me outside into the parking lot and lets out a laugh as though he's been holding his breath. “I can't eat in there,” he says.

“Why not?”

“I didn't want to have dinner with my parents. I don't want to have dinner with forty of their closest clones.”

“I thought you were hungry.”

He stares down at me, and I notice, not for the first time, how totally perfect his jawline is. You know how Johnny Depp has that incredible profile, that smoldering look that would inspire his face in marble? Well, I'm serious, Kevin is a major contender for his bust being cast in stone. He's talking and I must say I got lost for a minute.

“What?” I ask.

“Those people were wearing bibs, Ash. I don't want lobster for Thanksgiving. It's like their way of justifying their lives aren't total garbage. That they can't admit that there's no one who wants to cook them a meal, or a place to go. I don't want to end up like that, so I don't think we should start like that.”

“Lobster on Thanksgiving isn't exactly roughing it, Kevin.” As if I need to explain this.

“Did you notice how thrilled my parents were to have an invitation at your parents' house?”

“I assumed they did it for you.”

“My parents were at a golf tournament for Thanksgiving week, Ashley. Don't you find that slightly sad?”

I shrug.
Doesn't sound so bad to me, actually. Palm Springs and a golf course and spa? My life should be such garbage.

“They had nowhere to go, so they came here not even knowing if I'd be around. I think they hope I'll bring some warmth into their week.”

“They seem happy enough. I mean, for people without God in their lives.” I shrug. “When you're not a believer, what is life but one big way to avoid Him? Your mother was telling me that she came in second in the ladies' tournament. From what I know about golf, that has to feel pretty good.”

“Far be it from me to judge them, Ashley. I'm happy they have something more to do than the IQ conventions, but I left my Georgia roots for a reason.” He sniffs away the remainder of his laughter. “I'm sorry. I know what you're thinking. Poor little rich boy. Huh?”

“No, actually, I wasn't thinking that at all. I was thinking it makes me want to learn to cook. So I could make you feel like
you
had some-where to go on Thanksgiving.”

“I think that's the nicest thing anyone ever said to me.”

He stares down at me, his green eyes gazing into mine, and I feel his smooth hand come to my cheek. “I don't know how I knew about you, Ashley, but I saw it the very first time I laid eyes on you. That day you were singing. It was like a sign that you were just who you appeared to be. You don't really care to marry a doctor, do you?”

Did he just say the word
marry? I'll be. “I like someone around. And you're never around and that beeper is always attached. Besides, I've been waiting for Prince Charming for a long time. I want to be content with my life just the way it is. I have a great life.”

“I'll be here, Ashley.”

I swallow the lump in my throat. No one has ever spoken to me like Kevin. He's straightforward-honest. I'm so used to playing verbal poker with the men of Silicon Valley. There's no reason for that with Kevin. He says what he means, and means what he says. Without fear or trepidation. Which, of course, makes him completely suspect.

I'm fiddling with my hands, and he keeps pulling my chin up to look him in the eye.

“I know you'd want to be there, Kevin. But I'm high-maintenance. At least that's what Seth tells me.” I laugh and start to walk toward the car.

“Seth doesn't know a thing about you, Ashley. He never did.” Kevin calls after me. “And I'm beginning to think you don't either.”

I nod. “You're probably right. He never did.”

“When he brought you the tulips on the beach . . .”

My eyes pop open. “How'd you know about that?”

“I told him they were your favorite. I saw you choose some once in San Francisco when we came out of that garage.”

I knew Seth didn't have enough sense to bring flowers
. “Let's go eat leftovers from Kay.” I take his hand. “We don't have to decide about our future here and now. We've got all the time in the world.” Oh my goodness, I sound like Seth. “Then, we can go rescue your parents from mine. Or vice versa.”

“Let's go home to your mom's. I mean your parents and my parents. Who knows what ugly secrets they're sharing. There will be left-overs there.”

“And lots of relatives, and my brother especially. Let's just go eat quickly at Kay's. Do you mind? Just give me one Thanksgiving where I don't need Tums to settle my angst.”

Without another word, Kevin opens my door and we drive home to my place. I see Rhett bounding down the street at the corner as we're driving, but the dog recognizes the car and heads home.

“That dog is going to be the death of me.”

Kevin shakes his head. “That dog loves you.”

“I like him, too.”

Out of the car, Rhett jumps on my Juicy sweatpants, and the autumn-colored yellow, actually called Daisy, now looks like a giraffe print, covered in brown paw prints.

“Rhett!” I bend down and snuggle up with my puppy. “You've been a good doggy, home all day. Come on, let's go get you some doggy treats.”

I bound up the walkway after Rhett and open the door. Kay is watching
Terms of Endearment
as we come in. She's sniffling with a Kleenex in her hand, her red-rimmed eyes meeting mine. “What are you doing home?”

“Kevin and I thought we'd grab a bite, if that's okay with you.”

Kay flips off the television and starts for the kitchen.

“Sit down, Kay. We can help ourselves.”

“No, no. Please let me. It will be good for me to help someone who appreciates it.”

“We haven't eaten all day long, Kay. We'll appreciate it like a hard-working cowboy appreciates the wagon train,” Kevin says while patting his stomach.

I look at Kevin with my eyebrows scrunched together. “What are you, Clint Eastwood all of a sudden?”

He points at me. “Go ahead. Make my day.” He comes close to me and envelops me in a hug while Kay merrily hums her way into her domain. “So you'll cook for me someday?” he says into my hair.

“I said I wanted to cook for you. I didn't say I could actually do it.” I look up. “But I'll try.”

“I think it's hot that you want to cook for me,” he growls.

Breathe in. Breathe out. “Then, culinary academy, here I come!”

He bends down and kisses me with firm and determined lips. My stomach swirls like a northeastern wind, but I shake it off. Something is not right here. P. T. Barnum said a sucker is born every minute. I feel like I'm standing here with my last nickel, ready to give it away.

29

I
don't know what to expect at my parents', and I'm leery of walking in the house. It sounds quiet. Eerily quiet. I mean, these are the people who named me after Ashley Wilkes, and while there's a heart-warming story behind that, no one really knows that. They just think we're a little off-kilter. And they'd be right.

I look back at Kevin. “There's no yelling. That can't be good.”

“Maybe they're having dessert. Open the door,” Kevin says, like a movie extra waiting to enter the haunted house. Just as we open the door, his beeper goes off again.

I put a forefinger in his chest accusingly. “You've got that thing timed!”

He holds up two fingers and shakes his head. “Scout's honor.”

I open the door, and there's my family quietly sitting at the dining room table playing Scrabble. With the Mensa people. Wonders never cease.

“Hi,” I say quietly.
Don't want to ruin anyone's triple word score or anything.
I didn't even know my parents owned a board game.

Mei Ling, my sister-in-law, brings herself to her feet and waddles over. There's nothing worse than feeling large next to a pregnant woman. Mei Ling embraces me and whispers in my ear. “Get them out of here.”

“Dr. and Mrs. Novak!” I clap my hands together, like I'm announcing circle time at the local preschool. “I'm so glad you were able to come.”

“Oh, Ashley, we had the best time. Did you know your mother used to be Scrabble champion at her high school?”

I look at my mother. I have never seen her play Scrabble. I haven't even seen her do a crossword puzzle. My mom's smile indicates that her teeth are grinding against each other, and I have a feeling the Novaks are not her first pick for a set of in-laws.

Kevin gets his parents to the door by putting on their coats as they rise. I look at him and catch his smile. I guess it's the universal mind to be embarrassed about one's parents. They stand up, he ushers them toward the door, and then moves close to me and I feel his warm breath on my hair.
Seth who?

Kevin speaks into my cheek. “Whatever you do, do not hold me responsible for my parents' behavior. Remember, they live across the country. You will only see them twice a year.”

I nod, but I've already seen them twice this year. And I'm not even officially seeing their son.

“I've got to run to the hospital,” Kevin says aloud. “Mother, Father, I'll drop you at my place on the way.”

“We're having a fabulous time, Son. Why don't you come back for us?” Elaine says with a smile, but I can tell by the weary eyes of my family members that they're ready for a quiet, familiar evening of
Jeopardy
and
Wheel of Fortune.
They've had enough of entertaining the brain trust.

Dr. Novak Sr. stretches. He flexes his biceps and parades in front of my father. “Look at that, Hank. That's what working out will do for you. I could still take my son in a wrestling match, and I'm sixty-eight.”

“Yes, well, Dad, let's get you back home and you can work off some of Mrs. Stockingdale's fabulous dinner. It still smells wonderful in here.”

They're out the door and the collective sigh of relief sounds like a rushing train.

“Ash, where did you find those people?” Dave asks.

“Makes me glad my mother is in China,” Mei Ling giggles.

My father gets up and heads for the TV. He points at me as he goes by. “You gonna marry that guy?”

“Not necessarily. Mom, what happened?”

“Nothing, Ashley. Kevin is a darling boy. Don't concern yourself with his parents. I married your father, after all.”

My father smirks at my mom.

“I'm not getting married. I've just met the man. What happened?”

“Never mind, Ashley. It's not important.” My mother picks up the pie plate from the center of the table. “Help me clean up.”

Again with the cleaning! “Will you drive me home when I'm done, Dave?”

“You know, I could take Seth droning on about
The Matrix
for a lifetime before I go through that again.” He points at the door. “Those people need help, Ashley. Finish up. I'll take you home.”

“Come on, no one's going to tell me what happened?”

“I'll tell you,” Mei Ling offers, but Dave looks at her threateningly.

“Don't you say a word, Mei Ling. That garbage doesn't need repeating.”

I know Mei Ling will tell me later, but apparently I'm going to have to wait.

Three days later I march into the Reasons Sunday school meeting like I'm marching into negotiations in Taiwan. Just try and mess with me. The room is typically Reason. Unlike every other classroom, there's no coffee. There are no donuts. This is simply because no one can be bothered to pick them up at the front of the church where all the Sunday mothers have put together a platter for each and every class. These people are lucky I'm not the violent sort. They're all sitting around laughing, completely ignoring my entrance. And I'm wearing DKNY and looking good, so that's just not right.

I approach Pastor Max and his lovely wife Kelly and they smile at me sympathetically. As in,
poor Ashley can't find a man to save her life
. I hear the murmur as my presence becomes known, and Seth's absence gets talked about. I know what they're all thinking.
Poor, dumped Ashley, can't even land an
Average Joe
reject
.

“Ashley, did you have a nice Thanksgiving?” Kelly asks.

“I did. I'd like to make an announcement before class if that's okay.”

Max looks a little unnerved, and Kelly looks uneasy. “Pertaining to?”

“Pertaining to the Christmas party. It's for Kay. I want to make an announcement for her.”

They smile their perfect Osmond grins at one another. “Oh sure. Feel free. We'll lead with that!”

I walk up to the board, and I write down the following:

Kay Harding, MSEE
14056 Channing Way
Palo Alto, CA 94301

Ashley Stockingdale, Esq.
14056 Channing Way
Palo Alto, CA 94301

Pastor Max coughs and begins the class. “Well, I hope everyone had a fabulous Thanksgiving. I know Kelly and I did. I trust you all had a wonderful time with whatever plans you had. We're going to start today with announcements, and we have one from Ashley about our upcoming Christmas party.”

I clear my throat. “First, I have an announcement about Thanks-giving.” I smile broadly and I look at all the blank stares. I am the epitome of Spokesmodel. I could be on
Star Search,
unquestionably.

The complete litany of Reasons lies before me: bald men who think they're Keanu Reeves and Johnny Depp. I shake my thoughts. I am in a house of God.

“Many of you were lucky enough to have a Thanksgiving feast prepared by our own Kay Harding.”

“Yeah, Kay!” Greg shouts as a light round of applause starts. Presently, no one has noticed she isn't here.