Shark Out of Water (21 page)

Chapter 23

Ayez Foi

Dragging his hands through his hair, Guy struggled to keep himself together after hanging up with Carmody. He was exhausted from working night shifts then going straight to Charlotte, only getting sleep while she napped. He was out of his depth with Warren, and worried sick about Charlotte, who was still having a very difficult time with the chemo. It was beginning to be too much and he had no idea what to do about it.

“Guy?” Charlotte’s weak voice asked. “What’s going on? Why is Warren home from school already?”

Startled by her appearance, it took Guy a few seconds to rush over to her. “What are you doing out of bed? You must rest.”

He started to reach for her, but held off, worried about not having washed his hands. The way she was hanging onto the doorframe worried him, and he reached for her anyway. He was careful to only contact her clothing and not her bare skin as he tried to lead her back into her bedroom.

Charlotte shook her head at him. “Help me to the couch. You need to tell me what’s going on with Warren.”

Despite his reluctance, Guy guided her over to the sofa and helped her sit down. She looked over at him expectantly. “Warren got into a fight with a girl at school today,” Guy explained.

“What? Why?”

Hesitation tied Guy’s tongue. It was such a small thing, but explaining it would lead to him telling her what Warren told his classmates about him and what Guy told the principal.

“Guy, what is it?”

“I was speaking to Marilyn Finch this morning and it upset Warren. He argued with her daughter about it and pushed her down.”

Charlotte’s face screwed up in confusion. “Clearly, there’s more to the story than that.”

As much as Guy wanted to avoid the conversation, Charlotte was not giving in. “Warren mentioned that Caroline’s father no longer lives with them and he was concerned Ms. Finch was trying to… steal me.”

“What?”

Guy sighed, scrubbing his hands through his hair. “She was only asking how you were since she had not seen you lately. You asked me not to be so casual with other women, so I was only polite, nothing more. Warren was bothered, regardless, and told Caroline her mom could not talk to me anymore. Caroline argued, and apparently Warren felt threatened by the idea of her mother speaking to me again and pushed her.”

Shaking her head as she tried to process everything, Charlotte was even more frustrated than before. “Why didn’t you wake me up when the school called?”

“I was worried about disturbing you.”

Charlotte gestured at herself sitting on the sofa and Guy flinched. Clearly his plan had not worked out as he expected. “Guy, you should have woken me. I’m the one who should be dealing with any problems Warren is having at school. Why were they even discussing this with you?”

Guy looked down, knowing Charlotte would not like his answer. Her reaction and refusal of his suggestion that she move to a more accessible apartment made him certain what he had to say would upset her. He said it anyway and braced himself for her response. “Apparently, Warren led his teacher and the principal to believe we were married and I was his stepfather.”

“What?” Charlotte demanded. “Why would he do that? Why would the school not check with me? I’m the one they should be talking to, not you.”

“Why not me?” Guy asked, suddenly frustrated. He had spent the last three weeks doing everything he could for Charlotte, and he was happy to do so, but his friends wanted to help and Charlotte kept refusing. They
needed
their help, but Charlotte would not allow it. “I am the one who has been taking him to and from school, helping him with his homework, being involved in his life! Why not me?”

“Because he’s my son, Guy, not yours,” Charlotte argued. It was the most strength he had heard in her voice in weeks, yet he was not heartened by it.

Bristling, Guy crossed his arms. “I am capable of speaking to his principal. I dealt with the situation.”

“Dealt with it?” Charlotte asked in disbelief. “If you dealt with it, then why is Warren hiding in his room after storming in here like a steam train? Did you say something to upset him?”

“I said the only thing I could say, that he was wrong for arguing with Caroline and pushing her!” Guy shook his head. “What should I have said, that it was okay?”

“No, of course not, but you should have let me handle it,” Charlotte snapped.

“You cannot handle everything, Charlotte.
I
cannot handle everything. There is too much, and Warren is feeling it just as much as we are. He has been causing trouble since we returned from France.” Guy stood up, too agitated to stay seated. “You are not well enough to do everything you want to do, and I am trying to help as much as I can, but I cannot keep up with everything, Charlotte.”

Charlotte looked as if she wanted to stand as well, meet Guy as close to eye to eye as she could, but her weakened body would not allow it. “I never asked you to do everything, Guy. Don’t blame me for the fact that you’ve tried to take over everything!” There were tears in her eyes, and as much as Guy wanted to soothe them, he was too frustrated by her words to do anything but snap at her.

“I am not blaming you!” He threw up his hands. “I am just trying to be realistic, Charlotte!”

“You think I’m not being realistic?”

Guy laughed. “No! You are not. You try to keep working, but the stress is only harming you.”

“I have to work, Guy! How else can I afford to stay here?”

“Let me help you!” he shouted.

Guy had never seen Charlotte so angry before. “I don’t need you to pay my rent or bills, but it’s more than that. I have to work to keep my insurance and you know it! I don’t have a trust fund to fall back on.”

“No, but I do, and you are being stubborn by not letting me help you, Charlotte.”

“Stubborn?” she snapped.

Neither of them heard Warren’s approach, but they did hear him when he shouted, “Stop yelling at
Papa Guy!
It’s not his fault!”

Guy was shocked by Warren’s sudden desire to defend him, but as he looked to Charlotte, he saw more than surprise. He saw hurt as well and he struggled to hide his reaction. “Warren,” she said shakily, “Guy is not your father.”

“How come I don’t get to have a dad?” Warren demanded. “Guy can be my dad if I want him to! You can’t take him away. No one can take him away!”

The squeak of the apartment door opening drew everyone’s attention. Carmody stood in the doorway with Lily on her hip looking unsure of whether to stay or go. Warren saw her and immediately bolted to his room. The slam of the door left everyone else in silence.

“Who are you?” a red-faced Charlotte demanded.

Carmody glanced over to Guy for guidance. He was not sure what his expression said exactly, but Carmody seemed to know precisely what was needed. Gently, she set Lily down and whispered something in her ear. She first ran over and hugged Guy’s leg, then tore off down the hall after Warren. After she disappeared, Carmody turned her attention back to Charlotte, approaching the sofa and taking a seat next to her.

“I’m so sorry for barging in,” she apologized. “I’m Carmody, and I’m hoping Guy has at least mentioned me once or twice so this isn’t quite so awkward.”

Charlotte’s bottom lip began trembling. “You’re Carmody?” When Carmody nodded, some of Charlotte’s hostile stance softened. “What’re you doing here?”

“Guy called me when Warren threw a fit. He didn’t know what to do and he didn’t want to bother you. He’s seen Lily throw a tantrum… many times, but there’s a big difference between a three-year-old screaming about pudding and an almost six-year-old who is scared and worried about his family being pulled apart, right?”

“Right,” Charlotte whispered tearfully.

Carmody slid closer to Charlotte and slipped her arms around her frail body. “Guy wasn’t trying to step on your toes. He’s worried, probably more than you realize. And he’s exhausted, so try to forgive him for any of the stupid things he might have said before I got here. He barely has a filter as it is, being French and all, but he really starts babbling when he’s tired.” She smiled when Charlotte laughed a bit through the tears slipping down her cheeks. “Do you realize Guy has been going straight from work at night to here? Or that he hasn’t slept more than four or five hours a day in weeks?”

Charlotte swiveled to look at Guy, whose eyes were pinned to the floor, too uncomfortable with Carmody’s words to face either of them. “Guy,” Charlotte said, “you told me you had people covering your shifts on Tuesdays and Wednesdays so you could help me here. You’ve been going to work at night instead of going home to sleep? Why?”

Not able to answer, Carmody did it for him. “Because Guy hasn’t been able to find anyone to cover his shifts yet and he’s too good of a guy to just bail on them.” Carmody still held onto Charlotte, but she turned her attention to Guy for a moment. “Why don’t you let Charlotte and I talk about a few things on our own. There’s a very upset little boy in his room who I’m sure would really like to talk to you right now. Lily should have him sufficiently cheered up by now. She told me she was going to tell him jokes in French.”

That finally drew a smile to Guy’s lips. If everything else failed to remedy the worst day in a little boy’s life, Lily was a sure cure. Before heading for the hall, though, he walked over to the sofa and kissed Charlotte’s forehead. She touched his face gently, still teary-eyed, but let him slip free when Guy stepped back. “
S'il vous plaît ayez foi en moi
,” he whispered. As he walked back toward Warren’s room, he heard Carmody translating, telling Charlotte that he was asking her to have faith in him a little longer.

Chapter 24

Je t'Aime Aussi

“Knock, knock,” Guy said as he pushed the door to Warren’s bedroom open. “May I come in?”

The sounds of giggling he had heard through the door died away, but only somewhat. Lily’s and Warren’s heads were peeking out from under his blankets. Lily was grinning at her favorite big person, but Warren seemed unsure. “Am I still in trouble?” he asked.

“How about we postpone being in trouble long enough to talk,” Guy suggested. “No yelling this time,
oui
?”

Warren frowned at him, his bottom lip trembling. “Promise?”

“Promise.”

Finally, Warren gestured for him to come in. Guy left the door halfway open, so Warren did not feel confined, and jostled the two playfully until there was enough space for him to sit on the bed. Lily immediately curled up on one side while Warren hesitantly did the same on the other side. Normally, Lily would have started babbling about something or other, but she seemed to sense the situation was more serious than usual and remained quiet.

Guy struggled with how to begin. In the end, he settled on being direct. “Warren, did you tell everyone at school that your
maman
and I were married and that I am your
papa
?”

Warren tried to sink into the bed as much as possible, but still answered the question. “I just told them I had a new dad. I told them you were my
Papa Guy
.”

Even though Guy knew those two words had hurt Charlotte deeply, he could not help but smile. It was not that he wished to replace Warren’s real father—he knew Charlotte had tried very hard to make sure her son knew how much his father loved him—but Guy had grown to love Warren very much. He had spent so much time with him, caring for him and helping him, it was hard not to think of the boy as
his
. He was too concerned for Charlotte’s feelings to voice his thoughts, though.

“Why did you tell everyone that?” Guy asked.

Warren peeked up from where he was hiding beneath Guy’s arms. “Are you mad at me?”

It was a difficult question to answer. Guy was not angry with him at all, but his words needed to be chosen carefully. “Warren, you should not tell people things that are not true, but…”

“It’s kinda true, though, right?” Warren asked, sitting up now to face Guy. “I mean, the other kids who have dad’s, they do the stuff you do. They pick them up from school and go to work and help them with homework and take them to fun places and tuck them in at night and read them stories and play games with them. You do that stuff, too, and you’re here all the time, even though you didn’t bring all your stuff. You even sleep in Mom’s room sometimes.”

Guy’s eyebrows rose at that last observation. When he stayed over, which was not as often as he would like due to working more night shifts, he often slept in Charlotte’s room. Partly, the arrangement was to watch over her, but he also wanted to be near her when he could. He wanted to be with both Charlotte and Warren as much as possible. Looking at his little friend, Guy said, “
Oui
, I do those things.”

“Then why aren’t you my dad?”

It was another difficult question, but Guy did his best to answer. “Your real dad, Jackson, he is your
papa
because he and your
maman
made you…”

“In Mom’s tummy.”

“Uh,
oui
.” Guy left it at that and continued. “Sometimes people who are not related by blood become family when two people get married and the new parent adopts the child. Then legally, that person is their parent.”

Warren scrunched his face. “What does legally mean?”

Guy had to think for a minute about how to explain the concept. “You know how you have rules at school?” Warren nodded. “Well, grownups have rules, too.”

“About being someone’s dad?”

“
Oui
, among other things.”

Warren’s expression turned thoughtful again, the kind of expression that said a busy little mind was working very hard to come up with a solution. Finally, he put his hands on Guy’s chest and leaned forward so they were staring directly at each other. “Can you marry my mom and dadopt me? Then you could be my dad in the rules.”

“Uh,” Guy hesitated, “well, maybe someday, but right now your
maman
is too sick to worry about such things. She needs to get better first.”

Even though he did not have a clear answer, Guy expected Warren to follow up his request with a more insistent plea, as he usually did with anything else. Instead, Warren’s face crumbled in despair. Guy was at once worried that he was upset Guy had not said he would marry his mother and adopt him right away, but when Warren’s tears began to fall in earnest, Guy realized it was something even more frightening.

“My mom is really, really sick, isn’t she?” Warren begged. “She keeps saying she’s okay, but she never used to not go to work, and she sleeps all the time and I hear her throw up, too. And she’s not getting better even though she goes to the doctor all the time.” His little face peered up at Guy, desperate for answers.

Guy had little experience with children outside of Lily and Warren, but he knew this little boy was scared and hurting. He saw what was happening to his
maman
, but he did not have the knowledge to understand it. Guy knew Charlotte might be angry with him afterward, but he felt it was worth the risk. It was only hurting Warren to be kept in the dark.

“
Oui, mon petit homme
. Your
maman
is very ill. The doctors are trying to help her, but it is very hard and it takes a long time.”

“Why she sick?” Lily asked, speaking for the first time. Her big blue eyes were filled with compassion, even though she understood less than her new friend.

Guy could only shake his head. “We do not know. Sometimes people just get sick.”

Warren laid down next to Guy, his arm wrapped around his chest. “What kind of sick is she? I got the flu in winter time and it made me throw up a lot.”

“It is not the flu,” Guy said sadly. “It is called cancer. It means her blood got sick and has tiny, tiny cells that are not working right, and they keep making more bad cells. The medicine the doctors give your
maman
kills the bad cells, but it makes her very sick.”

For a long time, Warren was quiet. His hand twisted around Guy’s shirt, tightening and loosing as he tried to digest everything, until his fingers closed into a fist and stayed there. His little head pushed into Guy’s chest as his body began trembling. Lily was not offended when Guy nudged her aside so he could sit up and pull Warren into his lap. The tear-streaked little boy looked up at Guy and asked, “Is my mom going to die like my dad did?”

Guy’s first response was to tell him everything would be okay, but if he did and it was not true, it would break the boy’s heart and his trust in Guy. Lying to Warren had already hurt him enough. “Warren, the doctors are trying very hard to help your
maman
get better, but there is a small chance it will not work. I have faith she is going to be okay, though, and you should as well.”

“But what if she isn’t? What will happen to me if I don’t have a mom anymore?” More tears started falling in earnest.

“Sh, sh,” Guy pleaded, “it will be okay. You have a
grand-mère et grand-père
who will take care of you, yes?”

“I…don’t…want…to live…with them,” Warren wailed. He fell against Guy’s chest and sobbed.

Startled by his reaction, Guy could only hold onto him tightly and rock him back and forth. “Warren, you love your
grand-mère et grand-père
. I know your
maman
is going to get better and she will always take care of you, but why are you so upset about having to be with your
grandparents?”

“Because…then I…couldn’t be with…you!” Warren cried. “I love you
Papa Guy
!”

Guy’s arms tightened around Warren so much he feared he was hurting him, but he could not let go. “
Je t'aime aussi
, Warren. I love you very much.”

Lily crawled up on Guy’s lap and wrapped her little arms around both of them, patting Warren’s head as she said, “It’s okay,” over and over again. Guy was having a difficult time keeping his own eyes dry as well. He knew Myles was giving Charlotte the best care, but he worried about her even still. Her chances of going into remission were very good, but Guy knew things could change at any time. It broke his heart to think of losing her and Warren. They had become so much a part of his life in such a short time that he could not imagine it being any different.

Guy lifted his head, trying to wipe his face of tears, but paused when he caught sight of Charlotte and Carmody standing in the doorway, both crying. Guy was not ashamed of his tears, and they did not seem to be either, but Guy was surprised to see Charlotte leaning on Carmody as if they had become fast friends. He did not need to ask how long they had been standing there. Their expressions said they had heard enough.