“I swear I know nothing.”
“It is time you learned the cruelties of the ruling class. When I was a newborn, my older brother Amunhotep desired to rule with such ferocity that he concocted a plan. Knowing he could only come to power through a female from our lineage, he had the Amun Officials perform The Choosing Ceremony with me. I became his consort before I was even weaned.”
I bristled at this story about Grand Djed. “It pains my heart that you had no choice, Sit- Amun. I understand how this must have grieved you.”
“You think you understand? You little hedgehog, you have no idea what they did to me. So do not pretend to show me pity for the Choosing. What they did was far more savage and unforgivable. The mockery is that they made me the Royal Consort of Amunhotep The Magnificent.”
Sit-Amun ripped her sheath to shreds and pulled the last stitch from her body.
Horrified, I gawked at the penis between her legs. “You are a boy?
How can this be?”
“Mutemwia, my true mother wested shortly after my birth, so my older brother had me castrated. I was nothing more than a charade for him to prance out at festivals and on ritual days. Through no fault of my own, I am unable to produce an akh, yet I am chastised for being barren.
While Ti-Yee raised me as her eldest daughter, Ti-Yee, Nefertiti and others humiliated me in front of my Sesh, while what little power I had was relegated to my younger brother, Akhenaten, Pharaoh of the Sun, when my consort announced your father as new co-regent.
“I have lived my life in the shadow of the sun. That cursed orb has dispelled the darkness in which I thrive. By destroying the Amunites, your family has destroyed the only ones who truly cared about me.”
“We did not know,” I cried out. “I swear to you. How can we bring you into the redemptive light of the Aten? Come join us and renew yourself. There will be no judgment of your past. Your future is all that is ahead now, and it can be bright. We shall make a place in the living light for you.”
“Not if I kill you as retribution for Mery-Ptah. Then I promise to kill every female child in this Per Akh tonight. And I will castrate the males,” she said. Her lip curled. “But you, it will be a pleasure to drink your blood for the Heka Teckannu and consume your pineal gland as a treat.”
She pulled back her hand to throw another black ball of energy at me.
I couldn’t breathe, my heart pounded. I sprinted toward the curtain.
“Guard!” shrieked Sit-Amun.
A soldier ripped open the curtain withdrew his sword and blocked my path.
“Seize her!” Sit-Amun pointed at me.
Instead, the guard, who looked strangely familiar, first looked at
Sit-Amun then back at me. “Your Majesty.” He gave a slight bow to me then directed the sword at Sit-Amun. “You saved my family when the Amunites tried to murder my mother and rob my father for tithes. I am in your service for eternity.” He bowed again. “You may pass. I shall keep Lady Sit-Amun here until you are safely away. Peace be with you.” He pressed the blade to Sit-Amun’s throat. I looked into his eyes and I knew that if death was to be his punishment for his insubordination, he would calmly accept it—like a soldier.
“Thank you, may the Aten offer you a thousand blessings.” I touched his shoulder, then without a backward glance at Sit-Amun, I fled the Per-Akh into the inebriated crowd of celebrators at the Hathor Festival. As I wound my way through the throng, I stumbled against a man who turned to me.
Archollos! Relief flooded through me with such force that my knees almost buckled. He grabbed my arm. “Merit-Aten, join us. Do not run off.” I saw behind him Sarawat and Smenkhkare. I clutched at Archollos.
“Someone is after me!”
Sarawat reeled around. “You must have had too many red beers,” she sneered. “No one wants you. And, you do not need us; you never have.” She honked so loud she drew attention.
“That is not true.” I reached toward Sarawat. “I have always needed you. You are the dearest friends I will ever have. I am sorry if offended you. I must go. You cannot be seen with me or you could get hurt.”
“By who?” mocked Sarawat.
“Sit-Amun killed two mothers and their children. Now, she is after me.” My ragged breathing and high voice startled them. I jerked my head to glance back. An irate figure stomped through the crowd, so furious that the revelers parted before her. “Someone must alert General Horemheb.
Go. Save yourselves!”
Archollos embraced me. “Merit-Aten, wait. You saved me from the line of slaves. I will find the General.”
“She saved you?” asked Sarawat.
“She saved me too,” said Smenkhkare, touching my hair. “When the Amun priest forced me to be a golden boy.”
“That was you?” I asked.
“How can we help?” asked Smenkhkare.
“Protect the babies at the Per Akh. Especially Rennutet’s. Now go!”
“Here, Sarawat, take Merit’s headdress and run in that direction to confuse Sit-Amun,” ordered Archollos. “I will go with you to fight.”
“No, remember our pledge to the Aten. We cannot fight for peace. Besides, this is between Sit-Amun and me. Now, go! She is coming!”
Sit-Amun locked eyes on Sarawat and took a few steps toward her. I watched, pleased that our ruse had worked. Then she stopped, sniffed the air, and turned back in my direction. I had to escape. The darkness enveloped me. Which way should I go? I closed my eyes. The birth house was back to the south. If I went North-West, I could hide near the animal cages. No one went there at night.
The unlit stony path was difficult to traverse. Once again, Sit-Amun had transformed me into the cowering child who in my youth spilt ink upon her. Then my rage unfurled. That murderess! My feet scorched. Ego. I had cast judgment upon another.
“Where are you? You wretched little brown hare, I can smell you. I shall send my watchers to find you.” Sit-Amun shouted her threats into the black void of the night.
This time, I too had skills. The light in my crown and the Cosmic brilliance apparent only to my eyes illuminated my way. The smell of fresh dung spiced the air and I could see something pacing ahead. The Lion.
It had to be the one I saw earlier. Its scent would make me undetectable. If I could just hide here until morning, I would be safe. Approaching the cage in a mindful way, I spoke to the animal’s heart.
Please, I come in peace. Will you help me?
I thought.
The mighty beast plopped down, tongue out, and panted.
Come closer
, he thought. I obeyed, but only when our hearts and minds made the connection did I pull back the latch to open the cage.
Nothing shielded me from the golden feline with the glowing eyes. He approached with caution and sniffed me. His hot breath stung my face. I waited for him to invite me into his territory. With no muzzle or leash upon him, he could kill me with a single blow.
Suddenly, he leapt. Foolish me. My sheath was splattered in blood, no doubt offering the lion a tempting scent. I braced myself for the worst. Better the lion kill me than Sit-Amun. But rather than harm me, the lion stood on his back legs and embraced me with his front legs, his paws around my neck. I sagged against him, my heart pounding, then scratched his neck.
“Lovely kitty. Good kitty.”
“There is no hiding from me,” hollered Sit-Amun. “I swear I will track you down.”
The vile desecrator got closer. How could she know? My heart raced.
I had to recall my teaching in order to calm it.
Please help me,”
I thought to the lion.
“I need your scent to cover my tracks.
You will let me go free?
Yes, but first follow me. We have to get away from the structures. Over there, near the rocky surrounding
. Now he obeyed me, and we lay in wait.
I pressed against his back and felt him pant.
I looked skyward. “I bring down the Cosmic Light of Divine Will of the Aten. May your loving arms protect and guide me.”
I sat up, my stomach to the lion’s back, and felt the pulse of the universe beam down through me. The more my heart filled with this glory, the lighter I became, until all heaviness dissipated from my body.
The heartbeat of the universe pulsated through me, and then it happened. At first I could only raise a pigeon’s head off the ground. What if I fell?
With that thought, I dropped back down to earth with a thud. The lion jerked.
“All is well. I am sorry to have disturbed you.” I rubbed his mane and he purred loudly. What did Archollos once say? ‘To let go and trust.’
I tried again to reach that state of rapture with nothing but love within me. In measured time, my body lifted up off the ground. At first I had to stifle my disbelief. Although I was well schooled in the technique of levitation, I’d never been able to accomplish it.
I shall lift you up to the Celestial Abode. Rejoice in the power of the Aten.
I heard my father’s voice and felt comforted because he lived within my heart always. With my inner vision I could see Sit-Amun’s approach. I trusted my faith in the Aten to guide me. Sure enough, I now floated above the ground. With my increasing prayers and devotion, I rose until I floated above the stone-lined fish pond. The lion lounged below, content to be free of the confines of his cage.
“Where are you?” Sit-Amun shouted. “You cannot escape me.” She strode from the shadows. “I can smell you, and you reek of the dung of your Semite origin and your foul-smelling, goat-herding kin.”
She stopped just below me, unable to distinguish that I floated above the waters.
“I can hear your panting. Scared, like a hunted brown hare. Your blood will be so sweet, and I will suck your essence from your body.” Calm. Quiet. Serene. Her threats did not interrupt my union with my cosmic alignment. If this was the way I was destined to west, if this was what Pentu saw in my Soul Reflection, then I accepted my fate.
“Aha,” she declared with triumph, then pointing her finger up at me.
“So you learned some new tricks. Do not deceive yourself into thinking your Sun will keep you safe. You are in the shadows and I rule this realm. So, how will you die? Fire? Water?” She cackled, like someone whose mind was overtaken by something sinister. “Show me your power. I will allow you to die with honor. Fight me. You choose how to deliver the first blow.”
“I choose to live in peace. I will not fight you.” I kept my composure.
“Fool! Death is too kind for you Atenists. You are not even a worthy adversary.” Her incantation began in a low chant, spine-chilling words that evoked abject horror. I had to stay in alignment or I would fall into the abyss below. A shriek rose from the watery depth of the Nile behind me. Chanting. Chanting. The death call of Amun. How could I stay in my peaceful place?