Separation Anxiety (5 page)

I giggled through my disgust. “That’s revolting,” I said, waving my hand as I wrinkled my nose.

He looked over at me and laughed. “You look completely disgusted right now.”

I smacked him in the arm. “I am. That was gross.”

“My bad,” he chuckled, and I laughed as I warmed over at how comfortable things already were between us. He settled back into the couch, and I suddenly felt completely exhausted. The long week finally caught up with me, as it always did on Friday nights. My eyes wouldn’t stay open as Jesse flipped through the channels, and I snuggled into his side, my head dropping onto his shoulder involuntarily as I was drawn to him even in my sleep.

CHAPTER 3

When I first woke up, it took me a moment to remember where I was, and as that masculine Christmas smell invaded my senses, I remembered: I had slept in Jesse Drake’s bed.

Okay, his
guest
bed if we were being technical.

I smiled to myself. What a perfect night the night before had been. I replayed our talk, all the times he’d found a reason to touch me, the flirting that wasn’t full of pressure but still felt nice, the comfort of a man that I’d been missing for so long.

Oh, man. If I was crushing on Jesse before when we were just friends, I knew I was in serious trouble now that I was staying over at his house.

I contemplated the offer he’d extended the night before. Crashing at Jesse’s place had its definite pros. For one, I’d be getting out of my tension filled home and starting the process of moving on with my life. And for another thing, I’d get to gawk at the gorgeous Jesse Drake as much as I wanted. Wait, that wasn’t a good reason to crash at his place. But the first reason was. Right?

I stretched lazily, realizing how well-rested I felt. I hadn’t been sleeping well since… well, probably since our one year anniversary when I started to face the fact that things were over between Richard and me. The previous night felt like the best night’s sleep I’d had in a long time, and as I rolled over to grab my cell phone to see what time it was, I was suddenly curious how I even got into this bed. The last thing I remembered was watching Jesse flip through the channels and feeling his firm shoulder under my ear as I fell asleep on his couch.

God, I hoped I hadn’t snored. How embarrassing.

A glance at the clock told me it was just before noon.

Shit.

I was a guest in someone else’s home, and I’d slept until almost noon.

What kind of lazy ass does that?

It had to be fairly early when I’d fallen asleep the night before. By my calculations, I’d gotten about thirteen hours of sleep. Jeez.

I headed to the bathroom and freshened up as best I could. I swished some water around in my mouth and rinsed my face, and then I put on some fresh make-up so I wouldn’t look like hell warmed over. I gave myself another little giddy hug, still enjoying being in Jesse’s clothes.

For the first time, I wondered what Richard thought about me not showing up the night before. A small part of me was worried he’d think I’d slept with someone else. I wouldn’t, couldn’t do that; but I knew the type of person Richard was, and if he thought he could place the blame of our divorce on me so he could get more out of the deal, I wouldn’t put it past him to do that.

After I made myself somewhat presentable, I headed out to the kitchen. Jesse wasn’t around, but there were muffins on a plate and a pot of coffee with a coffee cup next to it. As I walked closer, I saw some papers on the counter with a note from Jesse on top. His handwriting was familiar; I’d seen it plenty of time
s for numerous reasons at school, but this was different. This note was just for me. “Printed these for you as requested. Let me know if I can help. Help yourself to coffee and breakfast. Cream in the fridge. I’ll be in the garage.”

I picked up a muffin and took the top off and then proceeded to eat the bottom. I always saved the muffin top for last. It was banana walnut and quite possibly the most delicious muffin that I had ever eaten. As I munched on the bottom, I moved Jesse’s note to the side and looked at the rest of the papers under his note. The top of the page said, “Dissolution of Marriage.”

I felt pricks behind my eyes as I realized that he had printed all of the forms I needed to file for divorce.

This man was a fucking dream.

I wanted to run out to the garage and wrap my arms around him. He had easily done in one morning what I hadn’t been able to do in a year. I was so used to doing things for myself that I forgot what it was like to have someone take care of me, and my crush on Jesse inexplicably increased.

I took my time with my muffin, taking a deep breath as I managed to keep the tears at bay. This was really going to happen. Richard and I were really going to get a divorce, and I had Jesse to thank for helping me finally do what I’d been stupidly avoiding for so long.

I poured a cup of coffee and found cream in the refrigerator. He had a nice selection of flavored creamers to choose from, and I went with the Caramel Vanilla. I stirred it into the coffee, and then I took my mug and headed out to the garage.

I slipped out into the garage and saw him working on his
end table at his workbench. At the sight of him, my breath caught in my throat just as I took a sip of my coffee, having the effect of making me choke and sputter and spit coffee everywhere. Lovely.

He was wearing pajama pants and nothing else. Sweat trickled down his back, showing how hard he was working on his project.
I gazed at the muscular planes in his back as he worked. Even around my choking, I could still appreciate the fine male form standing in front of me. Music blared from some hidden speakers somewhere, and I recognized Sara Bareillis’s “Brave.” I noted the irony as she sang, “Honestly, I wanna see you be brave.”

Was she telling me to be brave and fill out those papers? Or was she
telling me to be brave and mount that sexy man working with his wood right there on the garage floor? I was guessing the former, but suddenly I wanted the latter like I wanted to stop choking on my coffee.

He turned as he heard my choking, and I got to see the full effect of the intricate tattoo that ran the length of his right side. I stared at it as he turned. It was a phoenix abo
ut to take flight. One wing spanned around to his back, and the other wing spanned around to his torso. In its talons, the phoenix held a beautiful, intricate cross with a heart in the middle. A word was written in the heart, but I couldn’t quite make it out from where I stood. “Allison,” maybe? I’d never seen such an artful, beautiful tattoo, and on Jesse, it somehow gave his mysterious edge a bit of danger that I’d never noticed before.

I moved just a little closer, and it was confirmed. “Allison.”

Who the fuck was Allison?

“Good morning,” he grinned, and my eyes swept up to his. He grabbed his shirt and pulled it on over his head, covering what was most definitely a washboard abdomen. Dammit. “You okay?” he asked
over the music as I continued to cough around the coffee that lodged itself in my throat. He turned the volume down.

I nodded and held up a hand. One more big cough cleared it. I took another sip, this one going down the right way, and then I smiled. “Good morning,” I croaked.
I cleared my throat. “Thanks for the papers.”

He nodded. “No problem. I was se
rious about wanting to help you.”

“I appreciate it,” I said.

“Did you think any more about my offer?” he asked, his voice low and deep.

I nodded. I had thought about it, but I hadn’t come to a decision until I saw him without his shirt on that morning. Fuck yes I wanted to crash at his place for awhile. Was he kidding me? Fresh muffins, strong coffee, and that ridiculously perfect body. Fuck yes. Instead of saying all that, I said, “Yeah, I thought about it. If you really don’t mind, it would be great if I could crash here for just a little while
. Just until I find something permanent.”

His face lit up and he broke out into the biggest grin I’d ever seen. All teeth. Straight and white and perfect… just like him.

“As long as you need to, V,” he said, and then he stepped a little closer to me. His eyes were hot and intense, and he ran a hand through his hair, wet with sweat.

“I have to admit, I haven’t slept
that good in a really long time,” I said, his scent invading my nostrils as he stepped closer to me. It was still masculine and Christmasy, but now it had the distinct odor of working man mixed in. I’d always found sweat disgusting, but on him, it looked good and it didn’t smell bad. He was simply delicious in every way.

“I checked in on you a few hours ago, and you were sawing logs. I didn’t have the heart to wake you.”

I felt that heat creep back into my cheeks.
Sawing logs?
How completely and totally fucking embarrassing.

“I don’t snore,” I protested.

“Okay,” he said sarcastically with a chuckle. “I’m about ready for lunch. You in?”

God, he was good at making me feel mortified that morning.
Ahem. That afternoon. “I just ate breakfast. But I’d be glad to sit with you while you eat lunch.”

We headed inside and
I took a seat at one of the stools at that gorgeous oversized island. I watched as he moved with ease around his kitchen. He made himself a giant salad with about a million different vegetables and goodies that were already cut and stored in his refrigerator for easy access. Cucumbers, green peppers, broccoli, tomatoes, some hardboiled egg, a handful of walnuts, shredded chicken, a sprinkle of shredded cheese, some apple slices, and some grapes. He doused it in some sort of homemade dressing and took a seat next to me with a fork.

“Sure you don’t want any?” he tempted, holding a forkful out to me.

“Maybe just a bite,” I smiled, wrapping my lips around his proffered fork. God, that sounded dirty.

He shifted in his seat as he watched me chew and moan around that delicious dressing. “What dressing is that?” I asked.

“Homemade recipe. It’s a family secret, but I like to call it Jesse Drake’s Delightful Dressing.”

Fuck, I wanted more of Jesse Drake’s Delightful Dressing in my mouth. God, that sounded dirty, too. What was he doing to me? He was turning me back into an adolescent perv, that’s what he was doing.
Although Quinn and I were pretty good at being adolescent pervs on our own during our lunch breaks.

“It certainly is delightful,” I said, and he took a bit
e of his own from the same fork he had just fed me from. Something about that was outrageously sexy.

He stacked up another forkful of goodies and looked at me,
one eyebrow raised. I nodded, and he brought his fork back to my mouth. This time, I placed my hand over his as I opened my mouth. Our eyes locked, and something very sexual and intimate passed between us in that moment. I had the distinct inclination that he was crushing on me as much as I was crushing on him, but in my head I knew that I was wrong. I knew that I wasn’t good enough for someone like him, but it wasn’t going to stop me from enjoying the attention.

He pulled the fork away quickly and averted his eyes down to his salad, breaking that moment of desire that passed between us. He shifted in his chair again and cleared his throat. “Do you want more?” he asked.

Damn. That was a loaded question. Yes, I wanted more, but I couldn’t have more until the divorce was finalized. And those papers still sat on the counter where Jesse had left them earlier that morning. Where he’d left them after he’d sweetly checked on me. Where he’d left them after he had researched to find them. Where he’d left them after he’d clearly spent the morning thinking of me.

And then I realized he was talking about the salad.

“No, thanks. I’m full.”

“What do you want to do today?” he asked.

“I guess I should head home and start packing. Maybe fill out the paperwork and get Richard’s signature.”

“You need any help?” he asked.

“You’ve helped me so much already. I couldn’t possibly ask for more.”

He took another bite of his lunch.
“If you need something, ask. Don’t be shy, V. Not with me.”

I was glad he was staring in
to his salad, because my cheeks heated at his words. Of course I was shy with him. Did he have any idea the effect he had on me?

“Thanks,” I whispered, drinking some more coffee. “I do have one favor to ask,” I said, suddenly remembering.

“Anything.”

“Can you take me to get my car?”

He nodded. “Of course. Let’s go after I’m done eating.”

When he was finished eating, I headed to “my” room and changed back into my jeans and Central t-shirt from the day before. I folded “my” pajamas and made “my” bed, and then I gathered my purse, my phone, and the paperwork he’d so thoughtfully printed out for me.

Before I knew it, we were headed back to the bar where everything had changed the night before, and I suddenly realized the magnitude of what was happening. I was about to leave my husband, and I was moving in with another man. It was a strange realization. For all intents and purposes, he was just a friend, but there was certainly an undercurrent of something more between us, at least on my end. For the first time in a long time, I felt excited about the future.

He pulled his truck in next to my car. I grabbed the door handle, ready to open it and hop out, when he stopped me with a hand on my arm.
“Here,” he said, handing me a key and a garage remote. “For my house, when you get back.”

“Thank you,” I whispered, touched that he genuinely wanted me to stay with him, so much so that he actually had given me a key and a garage door opener.

“When will you be back?” he asked, his eyes covered with sunglasses.

I shrugged. “Why? Got big plans tonight?” I winked, hoping I was wrong but wanting to know if he was heading out later that night to bang some lucky girl.