Secrets (16 page)

Chapter Forty-One

Janey was having a brilliant evening. Together, she and Garth had worked their way through a wonderful meal and consumed several exotic cocktails. If she couldn’t remember how to flirt, it seemed Garth could. He’d touched her arm repeatedly, leant in and hugged her twice, stroked her hair and marvelled at its silkiness, and smouldered at her in such a way she’d thought she might faint. Inwardly flustered, outwardly she’d managed to remain calm. Currently they were sitting very close to each other as they enjoyed conversation about their worst ever dates.

‘I was nineteen,’ said Janey smiling ruefully. One elbow was propped on the table, chin resting in the palm of her hand. A candle flickered casting soft shadows. ‘I used to regularly see a guy on my bus. He was quite cute. One day we got talking, and eventually he asked me out. I said okay, and he suggested a picnic.’

‘Sounds good so far.’

Janey nodded. ‘He said he’d take care of the food. All I had to bring was myself.’

‘Right. Still seems like a date that holds promise.’

‘Mm. Until I opened my sandwich wrapper and looked at the two pieces of bread within.’

‘Problem?’

‘You could say that. There was something unappetising hanging out between the crusts. I opened up the bread to take a proper look. It was full of cold macaroni cheese.’

‘A macaroni cheese sandwich?’

‘Yep! Now don’t get me wrong, I like macaroni cheese – but preferably piping hot. Not congealed and in a sandwich.’

‘Quite. So what did you do?’

‘Well the guy copped my expression and immediately went on the defensive. He told me he was unemployed and needed to eke out his dole money.’

‘Fair enough. The bloke had a point.’

‘Yes, but then he started to rant. Within seconds he was talking about the bible and how it proved the existence of aliens.’

‘Ah.’

‘Even worse, he told me
he
was an alien.’

Garth blew out his cheeks and pretended to consider. ‘He could have been telling the truth. The macaroni cheese sandwich isn’t something many earthlings would try.’

Janey laughed and took another slug of her cocktail. ‘Needless to say, there wasn’t a second date.’ She looked up at Garth from under her eyelashes. ‘So, what about you?’

‘That’s a tough story to top. Let me see.’ Garth rubbed his chin thoughtfully. ‘Well I met this girl at my brother’s birthday party.’

‘Awww. Don’t tell me. There were jam sandwiches cut into triangles and a chocolate blancmange in the shape of a rabbit.’

‘You were there!’ Garth joked.

Janey giggled. ‘How old was your brother?’

Garth’s smile faded. ‘Thirty.’

‘Oh.’ Janey frowned. This wasn’t a story about teenagers then. ‘So what happened?’

‘Well this girl…Emma…she fancied my brother. But he wasn’t really interested in her. So she turned her attention to me.’

‘Charming!’ said Janey indignantly.

Garth shrugged. ‘You haven’t met Adrian. He’s a babe magnet.’

Janey spotted a big flirt opportunity and swam towards it. ‘I’m sure you are too,’ she murmured. Slowly she let her fingers travel to some of the hair spilling over her shoulder. She curled a tendril around one finger. She’d read in a woman’s magazine such a gesture signalled interest in a man. Or was it flicking? Should she instead be tossing her hair about? She took another sip of her cocktail and pondered. The article had also advised looking rapturously at the object of desire. Janey put her tumbler down and gazed fuzzily at Garth.

‘I felt sorry for Emma – she’d embarrassed herself you see. So I asked her to dance.’

‘Okay. Sounds promising so far.’

Garth grimaced. ‘And within forty-eight hours we became lovers.’ Janey knew she was squiffy, but Garth’s disastrous date story seemed to have become something else. Where was the punchline? ‘I was really busy with a novel at the time. Weeks went by. I completely failed to notice that, bit by bit, Emma had moved her belongings into my place.’

Janey frowned. Ah – rather than a dating disaster, Garth was telling her a
relationship
disaster. ‘Wow. I think your story is definitely going to top mine.’

‘And just when I’d summoned up the wherewithal to do the not-so-nice bit and ask her to move out...’ Garth paused. There was a loaded silence.

Janey’s eyes widened. ‘Please don’t tell me what I think you’re going to tell me.’

Garth gave Janey a frank look. ‘Emma told me she was pregnant.’

Janey could feel her jaw being overcome by gravity. She looked at Garth in horror. ‘And was she?’

‘Yes.’ There was a pause. Janey couldn’t think of a single thing to say. Shock was having a sobering effect but her body couldn’t deal with it quickly enough. She experienced a sudden moment of nausea. Gently, Garth took one of her hands. He curled it into his. ‘I’ve not been entirely truthful with you.’

Janey lowered her gaze. She stared at her hand held within Garth’s. It felt so right, but everything he was saying was so wrong.

‘Are you married?’ she managed to croak.

‘No.’

‘There’s a
but
, isn’t there?’

‘Emma didn’t want an abortion. I’m not the sort of guy to force an issue like that. We’d become a couple, albeit reluctantly on my part. So her belongings stayed. We had a baby girl. And you’re right, there is a
but
. For six wonderful months I was baby Anna’s doting daddy. But it transpired Adrian and Emma had had an affair. The baby I thought was mine…apparently wasn’t.’

‘Good grief.’ Janey didn’t know what to say. What crumbs of comfort could she offer to a man whose lover had not just betrayed him but gone on to turn his life upside down?

‘To cut a long story short, Adrian came to see me. He said a DNA test had been carried out and there were no doubts about paternity. Then the two of them calmly walked out of my house with Anna, and started a new life together. In Canada.’

Garth’s last word brought Janey up short. ‘Canada?’ she whispered. Oh no.
That
was why Garth had travelled to Canada. He wanted to win back this Emma woman’s love, and carry on playing daddy to the little girl he’d bonded with. ‘So…so,’ she frowned, wishing she hadn’t drunk so much alcohol and could properly concentrate.
So he wants Emma and Anna back
, her inner voice finished the sentence she couldn’t articulate.

‘I’ve been doing some investigating about genetics. Adrian’s DNA test isn’t conclusive. Not without me doing a test too.’

‘I see.’ Janey straightened up. ‘So that’s the real reason why you’re here.’

‘Yes.’

‘Where do they live?’

‘Vancouver. The last leg of our trip.’

‘Right.’ Janey’s thoughts were flying in all directions. ‘So why didn’t you simply go straight to Vancouver?’

Garth inhaled sharply. For a moment he appeared to consider. ‘I needed to psyche myself up,’ he eventually said. ‘Currently I’m still in a position where I could change my mind – and no harm is done. I could just carry on and do what it says on the Canada Companions’ website. Make friends. Have a nice holiday. But there’s another part of me that wonders how my womanising brother is treating Emma. Whether she has regrets. And, if so, how it’s impacting on a baby that might still be mine.’

Janey nodded slowly. ‘I see.’

She was enveloped in a haze of alcohol and misery. Carefully she removed her hand from Garth’s. This guy was off limits. It was like some bad romance story. Clearly this gorgeous giant of a man was still in love with his ex. Garth had flown thousands of miles to win Emma back from his traitorous brother, with hope that baby Anna was his child. It was a mess. But of one thing she was sure. It was Garth’s mess. And there was absolutely no room for Janey in his life.

Chapter Forty-Two

The Canada Companions were now in Toronto. Everybody was having a wonderful time – apart from Janey. She made sure a bright smile was firmly pasted on her face. To all intents and purposes she looked very happy. However, inside she felt like a piece of her had shrivelled and died. It had been bad enough losing Jake, but losing a second man was torture. Especially with him right here, by her side, wherever they went. She reprimanded herself.
Pack it in. He was never yours to lose. You got the wrong end of the stick. You weren’t even dating each other! He’s just…a companion. Exactly what it says on the tin. A Canada companion
.

Currently the Canada Companions were standing on the ground floor of the CN Tower. They were queueing for one of the high-speed elevators. Standing in front of Janey were Ruth and Rich, Amanda and James. Both couples were nose to nose. They couldn’t keep their hands off each other. Their constant loved-up giggles and public kisses intensified Janey’s misery over Garth.

‘Listen up, everybody,’ said Clive. ‘This queue is going to take another minute or two. I’ll tell you a bit of info while we’re waiting.’ He inclined his head and beamed at them all. Janey couldn’t imagine Clive as a vicar. He looked and sounded like a born-and-bred salesman. He certainly knew his stuff about the tourist sights. ‘This wonderful tower is a sheer stiletto that makes up part of the Toronto skyline. In a moment, we’ll all be stepping into a high-speed glass-fronted elevator. It’s going to whisk us up to the observation platform in just fifty-eight seconds.’

Janey wasn’t particularly good with heights. The thought of ascending almost fifteen-hundred feet in under a minute wasn’t making her feel any better.

‘You all right, gorgeous?’ asked Garth. ‘You look a tiny bit green to me.’

Janey nodded. Her heart skipped a beat at Garth’s endearment, but her head told her it meant nothing. ‘I’m a bit unsure about the glass wall in the elevator.’

‘Stand close to me. You won’t fall out. I’ll hold your hand if it makes you feel better.’

‘I’ll be fine, honest.’ Janey really didn’t want to hold Garth’s hand. She’d prefer to start distancing herself from him. Although right now that wasn’t possible, especially when the elevator arrived. The doors opened and instantly everybody surged forward, squashing together. Janey was pressed up against Garth’s gigantic body. She made herself go rigid but couldn’t ignore the sudden tingles zipping through her like forked lightning.
Stop it, Janey!
Think mundane thoughts!
Her mind wandered back to the English newspaper she’d read on the flight to Toronto. A certain hard-nosed woman who made a living making inflammatory comments had upset the general public again. This time she’d declared depression didn’t exist. So-called sufferers should pull themselves together. Since discovering Garth was on a mission to win Emma back, Janey had indeed felt depressed.
Tell me, Ms Big Mouth. How do you ‘pull yourself together’
? Okay, Janey knew she wasn’t living in a war-torn country…or dying of some hideous disease in Africa…or blind and begging on a street in India. But she still felt hideously miserable.

The elevator doors sprang open at the Look Out level. As everybody began to pile out, Garth caught hold of Janey’s hand.

‘You sure you didn’t lose your stomach on the ride up?’

‘I’m fine. Really.’

‘Good. Come on. Get your camera ready. We have some breath-taking views to capture.’

As they edged towards the panoramic windows, Janey couldn’t help but gasp. Far below them, an endless shifting scenery was spread out like some sort of industrial-patterned tablecloth. From this side of the tower there appeared to be a miniature Lego city going on – offices, shops, car parks, houses, hotels, towers and factories. Everything was divided into blocks that seemed to form a never-ending grid. The inter-sections were punctuated by green tree tops that, at this height, looked like specks of green tumbleweed. As everybody circumnavigated the tower, the scenery constantly changed – stadiums, industrial units, an open-air cinema, endless meandering rail tracks, super-long freight-trains and, finally, a huge stretch of beautiful jade-coloured water. Lake Ontario was framed by meandering silvery highways that heaved with fast-moving traffic. From this height the vehicles looked like colourful beads gently shifting on a never-ending necklace. Janey shaded her eyes from a sudden blast of sunlight so she could continue to gaze in wonder at the scene below. Her eyes drank in a miniature marina, home to hundreds of tiny dots which could only be boats. Further out on the waters were chugging cargo ships, gentle steamers and zippy speedboats spewing spray. Janey stood stock still. As she witnessed the chaos of life in every direction as far as the eye could see, she suddenly understood the real definition of
mind-blowing
.

Clive appeared by her side. ‘Isn’t it amazing? It gives you a taste of what God sees when he looks down from Heaven.’

‘It certainly does,’ said Garth. ‘You sound like you’re missing your flock, Clive.’

Their rep pulled a
so-so
face. ‘I’ll get back to the cloth eventually. Meanwhile, the only flock I’m missing is this one. I need to round you all up. We’re going to the Glass Floor level and the outside Sky Terrace. Follow me.’

‘Glass floor?’ said Janey nervously.

‘Don’t be a wuss. In fact I dare you to stand on it. And if you won’t, you’ll have to buy me cocktails tonight.’

Janey opened her mouth to protest, and then closed it again. There would be no cocktails tonight. Or any other night.