“Reese, you’re here at New York Presbyterian Hospital. You were unconscious when the ambulance arrived. I examined you and did an ultrasound. Your placenta ruptured, causing you to lose your baby. I’m very sorry for your loss. There was no way we could save the pregnancy. We had to perform a D and C to remove the fetus, so you will have to stay here another day for observation. Can I call someone for you?”
“That won’t be necessary. I don’t have any family here in the city.”
“What about your husband, or a boyfriend, perhaps?”
“I don’t possess either one of those at the moment, but I will be alright, doctor. Can you please hand me my bag? I need to make some calls. Can I ask you a question, Dr. Briggs?”
“Yes, you can ask me anything, Ms. Mitchell.”
“Dr. Briggs, why were you holding my hand?”
“I was holding your hand because you looked very peaceful as you slept, and I knew once you woke up, you wouldn’t be. Again, I am very sorry for your loss. I don’t usually work down here in the emergency room, but I’m happy I was here for you.”
“Dr. Briggs, what was the sex of my baby? A boy or a girl?”
With head hung low, he whispered, “A boy. The pathology report said it was a boy.”
Tears flooded my eyes to the point where I couldn’t see.
I lost Walker’s son…my baby boy.
My last connection with Walker was now gone, and I had nothing left. My tears were beginning to flow uncontrollably. I wanted to just die at that moment along with my son. Dr. Briggs held my hand again and asked if he could do anything for me. I pulled away from him.
“Thank you for answering my questions. If you’re not an emergency room physician, what do you do here at the hospital?”
“I’m a neurosurgeon, but rest assured, I was fully qualified to treat you. If you need anything, Ms. Mitchell, just hit the button for your nurse, and she will page me right away.”
After Dr. Briggs left my room, I placed my hand over my stomach. Remembering my last appointment with my doctor, I had heard the baby’s heartbeat. The sound echoed throughout the room. It was the most amazing sound I ever heard in my life. I wanted to record it and play it over and over again, and now Walker’s child was gone. I had lost my last connection with the only man I would ever love. Why did this happen to me, and to us? Phillip Reed was to blame for that. His fucking bodyguard grabbed me so tightly, holding me back from getting to Walker.
Please, God…take me to my son! I don’t want to be without my baby! Please, God, take me to him!
I must have been crying in my sleep. I could feel wetness on my cheeks, as I struggled to open my eyes. I couldn’t move my hands, and when I was finally alert, I realized my hands were bound and secured to the bed rails.
“What’s going on? Why am I being restrained?” I called out to the nurse, and she quickly entered my room.
“Calm down, Ms. Mitchell, the restraints are there to protect you, not hurt you.”
“Protect me? Why?” I was crying again and very scared.
“Let me call your doctor, and he will explain it all to you.” I know she was only doing her job. It’s not as if she wasn’t kind, but I wanted to scream and demand for her to release me. I just lost my baby, and now this? I didn’t understand why this was happening. My chest was beginning to hurt, and I couldn’t breathe. The beeping on the machines in the room was getting louder, and I was gasping for air. There was a scurry of activity in my room. All I could see was an oxygen mask covering my nose and mouth, and I could hear loud voices above me. My eyes began to close, and darkness consumed me. I saw no light around me. Just darkness. And then I heard a voice. A chilling voice that I would never forget.
“I warned you, Ms. Mitchell. I warned you.” It was Phillip Reed, Walker’s evil father.
chapter two continued...
I SCREAMED BACK with all my strength. “You did this! You killed my baby with your hate. Why couldn’t you have let me be happy with Walker? WHY??????????”
I woke up with such a force, my head sprang back into my pillow. I was still restrained, but I now heard a calming voice beside me.
“Shhh, Ms. Mitchell, try to take some calming breaths.” Dr. Briggs was stroking my cheeks and tucked my hair behind my ears. “I’m going to have my nurse take your blood pressure and vitals, and then I’ll be back to speak with you. Please, Ms. Mitchell, continue taking calming breaths, and I’ll be back in a few minutes.” I didn’t understand what was happening to me, and then the same nurse entered my room to examine me.
“Welcome back, Ms. Mitchell.”
“Please call me Reese. What’s happening to me, and why do you have my hands restrained?”
Dr. Briggs will be back in a minute, and he will answer all of your questions.” She politely smiled and then left my room.
Dr. Briggs? What happened to Phillip?
My head was so fuzzy, and I was very confused to what was happening. Just then, Dr. Briggs walked back into my room, and he looked sad and troubled.
“How are you feeling, Ms. Mitchell?” He asked with a worried tone to his voice, how strange coming from a doctor, no less. He was a stranger to me, but yet I felt comfortable around him.
“Please call me Reese, and I’m not sure what’s going on.”
“If you answer my question first, Reese, I’ll answer yours.”
“I’m okay.” I lied. His one eyebrow rose with doubt.
He doesn’t believe me, and why should he when I don’t myself. How can I be okay after losing my baby?
“How’s your pain level? Any discomfort at all?” he asked me as he checked my eyes with his light.
“I’m not in pain…physical pain, that is, but I am a little sore. My head is fuzzy, and I’m thirsty, maybe even a bit hungry.”
“Thirsty and hungry are good signs. I’ll have some soup brought in for you right away.”
“Will you feed me as well? You know with my hands being tied to the bed.”
I didn’t want to be rude to the kind doctor, but after all, I was still restrained and didn’t know why. He looked at me and once again stroked my cheek with his soft hands.
“If you promise to remain calm and try not to hurt yourself, then I will release you from your restraints.”
At that moment, I didn’t think I could feel any worse. All of my painful childhood memories about my depressed mother flashed back at me. Still restrained, I looked into his concerned eyes, and I began to cry.
“Dr. Briggs, I would never try to hurt myself…It’s just not possible. You must be mistaken.”
“I’m sorry Reese, but you did try to harm yourself. After I left your room, I along with my nurse heard you scream. By the time we reached your room, you were screaming and crying. You ripped out your I.V. You nearly fell to the floor trying to get out of bed. I had no choice but to sedate and restrain you. You slept for nearly six hours, and when you finally woke up, you began having an anxiety attack that mirrored a heart attack. Your heart rate accelerated, along with your blood pressure. Your breathing was unstable, and I needed to calm you before you went into cardiac arrest. Honestly, Ms. Mitchell, you scared me. I don’t ever remember a time when I was ever scared like that until I witnessed what happened with you.”
“You don’t even know me, Dr. Briggs, but I can assure you that whatever you were seeing was my reaction to losing my baby. I would never try to hurt myself; this I know for a fact.”
He removed my restraints, and his nurse assisted me with a shower. I was still very sore, but nothing I couldn’t handle. I refused the pain medicine. Having to feel this physical hurt right now was nothing compared to what my heart and mind were going through. I wanted to feel everything. This was my punishment for leaving Walker.
Dr. Briggs explained everything from the beginning. How I was screaming that I wanted to die, to pulling out my I.V. I can now see the bruising up my arms. I was shocked that I had slept all those hours, but my kind nurse that I now knew as Francesca explained that with the heavy medication I was on, this was normal. I had been dehydrated, and with the loss of blood, my body was very weak.
My meltdown didn’t help my condition, and after I finished my meal, I was forced to endure an hour long conversation with a psychotherapist. I was exhausted, but I knew I had to make some calls. The psychotherapist was convinced that I wasn’t a danger to myself or anyone else for that matter. What I was feeling was normal.
Oh I hate that word
.
I just lost my baby. I lost the love of my life. Having to endure what I’ve been through over these months, I think I was entitled to scream a bit.
This was my fault, and my fault alone. I should have taken better care of myself. If I had, my baby would still be here.
I stopped myself, because I didn’t want to begin feeling sorry.
I finally phoned my agent and Freddy. Marsha was out of her mind with worry and didn’t know where I was. It took me forever to calm her and explain what happened. She told me that my disappearance was about to make the evening news. I was horrified by that revelation and afraid that Walker would see me. Thank goodness she was being her usual melodramatic self, because that didn’t happen.
Freddy hurried over to the hospital right away. He was crying as he hugged me. He was taking all the blame onto his shoulders, because he was the one that begged me to come back. This was simply not true. I don’t know why I lost my son, but I knew I had to move on and put the pieces of my broken heart back together. Freddy stayed with me for a couple of more hours and then he had to board a flight to Milan. I hugged my friend, and we said our goodbyes through our tears.
Little did I know this would be the last time I would see Freddy. After my disastrous encounter with Walker’s father and his body guard, I phoned Marsha to book me something in New York. His father had eyes everywhere, and he was determined to keep me from his son. I used my job to get back here, and once I did that, I was determined to find Walker. I finally explained everything to Freddy, and he said he wanted to hire a hit man to take out Phillip Reed. I needed my best friend when I was ready to face Walker. Freddy was in Europe, and for me to ask him to come back went beyond the bonds of friendship.
I chickened out, and then Freddy convinced me to come home. No one could predict what was going to happen to me. I don’t know if it was the universe telling me that having Walker’s child was not meant to be, but I never believed that. I should have told him about the baby from the beginning and stand up to his father. I never gave Walker a chance. I had it all planned out. I would find Walker and tell him everything. I would crawl on glass if I had to, just for him to listen and take me back.
I was hoping Walker would forgive me for ever leaving him, and prayed he would take me in his arms and tell me my nightmare was over, but that didn’t happen. Losing my child and suffering this immense loss was too hard to bear, but this misery was on me. To blame Phillip Reed was easy, but ultimately I blamed myself. If I had trusted Walker to help me, he would have protected me and not let his father hurt me or my family.
I didn’t do any of that. I committed the one act I swore I would never do, I became…
her.
My mother was weak, and I am my mother’s daughter. I succumbed under all of Phillip’s threats, and all I was left with were the consequences of my actions.
I was gathering my things when my hand holder of a doctor walked in.
“Good morning, Ms. Mitchell. How are you feeling today?”
It had been several days since my meltdown, and now I was being released. I was beyond ready to leave this place.
“I’m better, Dr. Briggs. Thank you for asking.”
“I just signed off on your discharge papers, and left all your post op paperwork with your nurse. You will have to take it easy for the next week or so.”
“Thank you, I will manage just fine.”
“I don’t doubt that at all, Ms. Mitchell.” He winked at me with a sparkle in his eyes. I smiled back at him.
“You can call me, Reese. Ms. Mitchell sounds so formal and it makes me feel like I am back in school.”
“Fair enough. Now that we are on a first name basis, will you please call me Samuel? I was about to sign out for the day. Would it be too forward of me to ask you out for coffee?”
“I guess under normal circumstances it wouldn’t be considered forward, but this is not normal. I was your patient up to a few minutes ago, and you know why I was here.”
“Reese, don’t over think things. It’s just coffee. Please let me escort you back to your hotel, and we can dine there
.
”
Over think too much? Oh man, I am the queen of over thinking, and to hear those words again just breaks my heart. Walker was forever telling me that.
“Thank you, Samuel. I would love to have coffee with you.”
Samuel walked with me through the hospital valet area to retrieve his car all the while keeping his hand on the small of my back. He was forward with his mannerisms, but after what I had been through, this was a welcomed comfort.
He drove us back to my hotel, where Marsha was waiting for me. She had me booked on an early morning flight back to California. Samuel was eyeing her up and down, not too sure what to make of her. I don’t think he knew that I was a model.
“Oh, thank god, Reese! I was going out of my mind with worry. I phoned the hospital, and they told me you were released. I didn’t know what happened to you. Freddy is back in Milan, no one tells me a thing. I’m supposed to be your friend, for cripes sake, and now you’re here.”
Grabbing my hands, and eyeing me up and down, she forcefully pulled me into her. I was considerably taller, so I almost toppled her. Samuel remained quiet while Marsha’s mouth was going a mile a minute.
“Marsha, please calm down. I’m alright, can we take it down a few notches?”
“I’m sorry, Reese, but oy vey! The last time I heard from you was days ago, and then when I finally do, you’re in the hospital? How do you expect me to react?”
“I’m sorry too, Marsha. I never meant to worry you, but I’ve been through a lot. I can’t explain it all right now. Can you please bring my things up to my room, and I will meet up with you later?” I turned to Samuel and smiled for the first time in days. “I promised the good doctor here a cup of coffee.”