Saving This (The McCallans #5) (20 page)

Jay snorted. “And I’m sure she didn’t appear for a couple of hours and you had to put the baby to bed, huh?”

Teague frowned at him. “Well that’s not the point.”

Laughing, Jay said, “Yes it is. But dude, if you got sexual favors later on, you win no matter what. We get psyched out by our women all the time, but we’re simple enough for it to work. Sex. It balances it all.”

“I don’t even know how Melanie puts up with you, to be honest,” Teague said. “She is one special girl. If I heard half the shit that comes out of your mouth, you probably wouldn’t have a working set of testicles.”

“Hey, let’s just say my apologies can’t be topped,” Jay shrugged arrogantly. “If you can make your women come all over your tongue any time you want, you’re golden. She loves and hates me for it. I’ll just say that.”

“Yeah, guess your mouth is both good and evil.”

Jay only shrugged as if to say, “Damn right,” but since Tyse had been so quiet, he looked at him to gauge his reaction. “And look at your smirk. You say shit too but you’re not going to share with us. Too polite, brother?”

Tyse lightly laughed but shrugged. “Too polite to share the private jokes I have with Sarah, yes, but smart enough to know she likes the dirty ones. She’s got a soiled sense of humor, you know.”

Everyone laughed, and it was Teague who said, “I don’t doubt it. And they think we’re dirty when we’re all together. Pssh, those girls are
filthy
.”

They continued to joke around, and for Max, that’s when it turned awkward. When they spoke of Sarah, all he could think about was Olivia, who had been somewhat of a prude when it came to sexual banter and dirty humor. He didn’t know Sarah all that well, but after listening to the guys talk about her, maybe she was nothing like her sister. Olivia had either been too uptight to have fun with sexual humor, or she’d never really been comfortable enough to loosen up.

Maybe Max’s personality had been way too much for Olivia from the start, and he hadn’t realized it.

“And what about Anna?” one of the guys asked.

Upon hearing Anna’s name, Max redirected his thoughts. He wasn’t even sure who had asked it, but thought maybe it had been Jay.

“What about her?”

But it was Teague who shrugged. “She’s pretty laid back from what I’ve seen. How’s her sense of humor around
you
?”

“When it comes to sex,” Jay emphasized with a smirk.

Max glanced at both guys, and then at Tyse, who knew Anna the best. The irony of that was still a bit of a burden. “She’s, uh…”

He paused to assess his thoughts on her. She was sexy as fuck and had a dirty mouth on her when she wanted to, but sharing that with the guys felt somewhat inappropriate right now. Why was that? Obviously this was a casual dude conversation, and he trusted that anything he said wouldn’t go past these walls, but maybe he wasn’t quite ready for the buddy-to-buddy disclosure just yet. This entire situation—being here with just the guys again—needed some time to get used to.

If they’d even have more opportunities like this.

“Anna’s a pretty good match for me,” Max finally replied, choosing his words carefully. Images of her keeping up with his sexual appetite played like a movie in his head. He’d never met someone who was so laid back and happy, yet was also demanding and completely captivating in life
and
in bed.

“A good match for you?” Jay somewhat scoffed. “Dude, if I remember correctly, you were always shy and awkward but good at faking a cover. Do you two sit there and be all weird and giggle when someone sees a cock or tit, or do you get into character to avoid that?”

“Oh Jesus,” Teague scoffed, seeming to feel a bit uncomfortable. He also seemed like he wasn’t sure where this conversation was going to go.

But surprisingly, Max laughed. For one, it was almost like old times with the three of them. Back then these conversations happened quite frequently. Girls, girls, and more girls. There’d never been a shortage of them wherever they went. But often the guys just wanted to do crazy shit and have fun with it. Chicks were always important, but cars and letting loose in the city without being found out were actually the biggest rushes they’d ever experienced together.

“Anna is very straightforward,” Max answered with a nod. “I don’t have any awkward moments with her. Well, I mean, not any sexual awkwardness.”

Jay raised his eyebrows. “Ah, come on, man. Don’t give me that. You can charm and fake your way through any fucking situation you want. But if you tell me she intimidates you, it just might make my year.”

A year ago—or even a month ago, for that matter—a comment like that would have bothered Max. But the truth was, Jay had always been Jay, and his personality had never changed. He’d always spoken his mind and it was a given he always would.

It was Max who had changed how he interacted with people, and he knew it without a doubt. Turning into a people pleaser had ultimately stripped him of his own personality, and the feud between his family members had brought out much darker sides to him in the past.

“Forget what you’ve seen of me the last few years,” he answered. “Because you’re right. I’ve always been able to fake my way through just about anything. Ironically, my biggest strength has always been my weakness. In being so good at one thing, I’ve let it mess up just about everything else because I didn’t know how to balance it.” He cleared his throat and shook his head. “Yeah, so, uh, can we just not talk about, eh…?”

Teague stood from where he sat and said, “God, look at the time. I, uh, should probably get home. I’m sure the girls are about done with their night out.”

Jay glanced at the clock and then his phone. “Hell no, I haven’t even gotten a text—”

“Yeah, I’m tired,” Tyse cut in as he stood. “I’m not used to babysitting your kids.” His smirk made Teague smile, but Jay still seemed confused as he stood. However, all three of them wrangled up the two boys and the things they came with, and were gone five minutes later.

Max re-entered a silent house, closing and locking the front door behind him. His son was asleep in the other room, but it was almost like the reality of change hit him all at once and he could feel a tangible difference. He was feeling like he could finally navigate some of his own choices.

No matter how much he was ostracized for it.

Chapter Twenty-Three

“With this most recent news, an announcement coming straight from Craig McCallan himself, it looks like we can expect a
lot
from this family of talented actors in the near future,”
a female voice cheerfully reported.
“For all you Max McCallan fans…your dreams of seeing him back on the big screen are about to come true as early as next year.”

The newscast cut to a commercial break, just as the fork Max was holding clanked to the tile floor.
The evening news had been on in the next room, and upon hearing his last name the first time and the words “big announcement,” he’d stepped into the family room apprehensively.

The heaviness of what just happened hit him right in the chest.

“The fucking five o’clock news?” he growled to himself, searching for his phone at the same time. “The regular news, national television, not celebrity gossip,” he mumbled. God, what the fuck did his dad do this time!?

He typed in whatever keywords he could to Google this newest piece of “news.” Whatever the hell his dad did, he must have done it in a big way, and definitely without his consent.

“Seeing me back on the big screen soon. What the fuck does that mean?”

If his father had announced him as directing that damn movie after being told not to, Max was going to have a serious meltdown. This was going way too far to prove a point; a point his dad had no right to make. It was one thing to make mention of it to those in the industry, but a public announcement?!

After trying a couple of news links and videos, Max finally found one of the same broadcast, with his father doing some sort of press conference outside of his production studio.

What?

“
McC Studios is committed to personally launching some of the best entertainment in the industry,”
Craig spoke,
“and I’m honored to announce we have purchased the movie rights to the number one book series,
High Society,
and will begin filming in February.”

A clattering of cameras clicking and voices competing commenced, and someone asked if Max was going to be playing the role of Dane Harrington.

Craig smiled without any true intention to conceal his answer, but coyly replied,
“Ah, you’ll just have to wait and see.”
Another slew of questions were shouted; about Max, about the role Max would be playing, when would Max make the announcement himself…

“Motherfucker!” he yelled at the screen, throwing down his phone. “Fucking
hell
! Bastard son-of-a—!”

“Daddy?”

Max froze, the weight of reality binding him with a special blend of panic and embarrassment. Turning around, he saw Chase standing in the hallway. Being around each other for the past few days should have been enough for him to watch his mouth around his son, but Craig’s sudden “announcement” of a new project pretty much stripped him of every bit of dignity in that moment.

He took a deep breath and came across the room. “I’m sorry buddy, dinner’s almost done.” Chase had been so quiet playing in his room Max had completely forgotten he was in the house. The mountain home had always been solitude for him in the past; he needed to remember his damn responsibilities.

“Why were you yelling?” Chase asked as Max picked him up.

Taking his time to answer, Max walked into the kitchen to stir the fettuccini. “I’m sorry about that, pal. I just heard something on the news that wasn’t so good. I’m sorry you heard those words come out of my mouth.”

Chase shrugged. “Mommy says bad words too.”

Max didn’t know how to respond to that, so he took Chase to the table and sat him down. “What should we have for dessert? Ice cream or pie?”

“Both!” he cheered, punching a fist into the air.

“Ah, you’re too much like your dad. I say both, too.”

Max returned to the stove and finished up. He listened to Chase jabber about Teague and the babies, which was quite nice to hear.

“It’s Anna!” Chase hollered, jumping up from the table. He pressed his nose to the front window that faced the driveway. “Anna’s here!”

“How about you go be a gentleman and open the door for her,” Max suggested. “I’ll get the food on the table.”

Chase took off to answer the door, and while Max heard his little voice interacting with Anna’s sweet voice, he garnished the table with dinner.

“Well hello there,” Anna smiled as she entered the dining area. “This looks amazing.” She was holding Chase’s hand and knelt down next to him. In somewhat of a whisper she added, “I see your daddy has a hidden talent. Does his food taste as good as it looks?”

Chase giggled with a shrug but hopped back to the table to sit down.

“Oh, so I have to be a test dummy?” Anna asked as she stood, smiling at Max as he came to greet her.

He slid his arms around her and gave her lips a gentle kiss. “Maybe. Maybe not. The fact is…you’re willing to risk it.”

Her smile widened and she teetered her head with a response. “Yeah, I am. In more ways than one.”

Pretending to be clueless was not a game Max ever chose to play. He knew exactly what Anna meant, and being that their relationship was indeed an actual relationship—complete with it being all over the media now—he appreciated her willingness to remind him of her commitment as many times as she could.

But it worried the shit out of him. He’d been doing his best to steer through this new territory—being in a relationship with someone and for the world to see, whether he liked it or not—and he was hesitant to let it get very serious. There was no way he could handle such a strike at this point in his life. He had his upcoming movie to focus on and didn’t need unnecessary publicity taking away from that.

“Me too, sweetheart,” he whispered, kissing her forehead this time.

Why the hell did he say that? He was automatically being compliant. He groaned to himself, silently chastising his habit of being convincing and agreeable. The truth was, although he accepted this relationship with Anna, he wasn’t at
all
ready to risk anything. Too many changes were happening at once. He needed to slow the fuck down.

“Daddy, can we
eat
?” Chase whined impatiently.

They each sat down at the table, just as Max’s phone alerted him with a text. He went to silence it but saw Kate’s message plain as day.

Where the fuck are you!!?? Where the fuck is my son!!!!! Call me NOW!

Following professional advice, he chose to reply with a text message instead of a call. He excused himself from the table, giving Anna a silent warning as to why. She frowned but focused her attention on Chase while serving him some dinner.

Max: We’re just starting dinner and staying in for the night. I’ll bring him to you in the morning since you never told me what day you’d be back.

It didn’t matter what Max said or didn’t say, Kate would shit bricks either way. Sometimes the audacity of that woman was really hard to believe. Poised and put together for the public, but a total fucking nightmare behind closed doors. He’d tried to understand her resentment and hostility a million times, but he just couldn’t wrap his head around it. She got money and notoriety, was making her mark in society like she wanted…

What more did she want, and why was making his life a living hell even a part of it?

Kate: Where are you!? Staying where for the night? Where is my kid!!!!!!

Max: He’s fine. We’re just having a quiet time away from the city. We’ll see you in the morning.

Kate: Let me talk to him!

Max: I’ll have him call you after dinner

Kate: Not good enough! I want to talk to my son!

Kate: Stop being an asshole

Kate: Put him on right now before you find yourself splattered all over the tabloids in the morning!

Well, now that was the perfect threat. Kate was smart, but every now and then her fake composure faltered. Max chose to ignore her, even leaving his phone on silent in the family room. He returned to the table just in time to hear Chase talk about C.J. and Cade from the night before.

“They sound so super cute,” Anna smiled. “I’m glad they have you to look out for them, too.”

“I wanna play more but they are too little,” he answered.

“They only need some more time to grow bigger like you. Just wait until you’re all older, then you get to do a lot more things together.”

Max smiled as he considered that, especially after spending last evening with his brother and cousins. It would be ideal. If things could go back to normal and he could have a better relationship with his family, maybe everything else wouldn’t seem so bad.

Once Chase had watched one of his favorite cartoon movies after dinner and was tucked into bed, Max sat down on the couch with Anna. She seemed particularly aware of his mood, but Max had yet to inform her of the entire story.

Perhaps now was the time.

“I think I should probably fill you in on some things,” he began. “If you and I are moving forward with this—you know,
us
—then you should be in the loop. Thank you for giving me the time to bring it up on my own, but I don’t really think there will be a ‘better’ time. It is what it is and…I trust you so…”

“Do you really?” she asked carefully, studying him for a moment. “Do you really trust me or do you
want
to trust me. There’s a difference, Max. Because if you don’t entrust me with your secrets, then I don’t want to know them. I don’t want you to appease my curiosity and cushion my concern. I want you to feel comfortable with me on your own accord.”

He contemplated for a good ten seconds, just to respect her feelings and process her words. “I understand where you’re coming from, and I appreciate your honesty—”

“You don’t need to be so formal with me either. I’m a big girl. You don’t have to validate my feelings or justify your inhibitions. I get it, okay?” She scooted closer to him on the couch and placed her hand against his neck. “Max, I care about you and your well being more than I care about my curiosity being satisfied. Sleep on it, okay? Tell me in the morning if you still feel the same way.”

She kissed him on the lips, slow at first with just the tip of her tongue, and then deeper when he pulled her closer to hold her tight. One thing easily led to another, so Max stood from the couch and pulled her along to his bedroom.

Once he shut and locked the door, he pressed Anna up against the wall with his body, pinning her hands above her head. With his other hand, he gripped her hip, kneading his fingers into the softness that curved to her backside.

“You have no idea how much I’ve needed this with you the last few days,” she whispered.

“I feel the same way,” he murmured into her hair, his lips against her temple. He kissed her mouth again, delving deep with his tongue, meeting the desire she was allowing him to see and feel.

She exhaled a shaky breath when he pressed his lips against her forehead. “When you kiss me, everything goes away but us. You take me to another place; a place that makes me crumble in the best way; a place I’ve only been to with you.”

Hearing such meek admissions was the biggest turn on right now. From the news conference to Kate’s demands, Max wanted to escape to another world. He completely understood what Anna meant: when the two of them were together, there was a connection that he’d never experienced before. Maybe that was what love was about; two people not only craving every physical pleasure from each other, but two people who valued the other’s wellbeing more than his or her own.

He even craved just being in the same room with her.

But no, he wasn’t in love with her. He wasn’t even sure what love was anymore. He’d once had it—or thought he did—and it had destroyed a large portion of who he was. A definition of love seemed to change within particular circumstances. He also believed there were many levels to loving someone. But he couldn’t imagine having feelings for someone again only for that person to walk away.

Love only served those who
loved
love.

Anna tugged her arms down, so he released his hold. He could tell she was about to switch him places in order to give him a blowjob, but decided he wouldn’t let her. Instead, Max led her to the bed. He slowly undressed her, taking his time to feel her skin with every touch of his fingers. She was watching him, but every now and then she’d close her eyes and exhale a bit heavier. These moments with her—the intimacy that made her moans catch in her throat—were what Max was beginning to enjoy
and
fear.

He was falling so fucking hard but he refused to be a lover of love.

“Baby, get on the bed,” he spoke softly.

She did as he commanded, lying on her back, still watching him. Her entire body was bare before him, every inch exposed for him to ravage if he so desired. He’d get to that in a bit, but right now, he wanted to cherish and take care of it.

He knelt on the bed between her legs, spreading them just a little more. Lifting a thigh, he leaned down and gently kissed it, his tongue slipping out in between kisses to run along her skin. He gently bit the inside of her leg and she took in a sharp breath of air. He knew she loved it because she shifted the rest of her body seductively, informing him she wanted more.