Dylan looked up after Rebecca gasped in surprise. Her eyes slowly traveled up Rebecca’s body. Rebecca watched Dylan’s eyes darken, the emerald orbs filling with an emotion Rebecca didn’t recognize. Rebecca’s skin prickled from the heat.
“Hello, beautiful,” Dylan said, her voice husky and low.
“Hello.” Rebecca felt the loose knot holding the towel closed begin to loosen. She hurriedly grabbed the towel before the halves separated and fell to the floor.
Dylan cleared her throat and turned away. “I didn’t mean to scare you. Mom washed and dried the clothes you bought yesterday. I was just putting them away for you. I want you to think of this as your room. Whenever you’re here, this space is yours. Even when you’re not, it will still feel like yours to me.” She pushed the drawer shut and cleared her throat again. “I’ll let you get dressed.” She headed for the door.
“Dylan?” Rebecca waited for Dylan to face her before she continued. There was so much she wanted to say but she didn’t know where to start. Or where to end. “Thank you.”
“I don’t know what I did, but you’re welcome. When do you have to be back?”
“Services don’t begin for a couple of hours yet, but I want to get home in time to feed the horses. I love taking care of the animals. Especially the babies.”
“I can totally see you doing that. You’re going to make a great mother someday.”
“So will you.”
“I don’t know about that. But with you around, I can learn from the best. I’ll wait for you downstairs. I’ll take you home after we grab some breakfast. Next week, maybe you can stay longer.”
“If you’re not tired of me by then.”
“Not a chance.”
The time had come for Rebecca to leave Dylan’s world and return to her own. She had thought the transition into Dylan’s world would be harder than the one out of it. Who would have thought that it would be the other way around? Though she looked forward to going home, she couldn’t wait until she could return to the Mahoneys’. They had opened their home and their arms to her. And Dylan had opened her heart. No matter what happened in the future, Rebecca knew she would treasure the Mahoneys’ hospitality for the rest of her days.
After breakfast, Dylan drove Rebecca to Lutz and pulled to a stop next to the winding road that led to the family farm. Dylan could go no farther. Rebecca’s family tolerated intrusions from the outside world during the week, but not on Sundays. The Sabbath was reserved for worship or visits with family or their Amish neighbors.
“Thank you, Dylan. For everything.” Rebecca looked around to make sure no one was nearby. Then she gave Dylan a quick kiss. “You made the first weekend of my rumspringa one I shall never forget.”
“Neither will I.” Dylan held her fingers against her mouth as if her lips burned. “Where do you want me to pick you up on Friday? Marian’s again?”
Rebecca noted the look of displeasure that crossed Dylan’s face. It was obvious Dylan hadn’t enjoyed herself at the hoedown. To be honest, Rebecca hadn’t, either. Just thinking about those few hours made her stomach queasy. “No, one weekend like that was enough. I did it once. I don’t have to do it again. Drinking and partying aren’t for me. I just want to spend time with you and your family. Is that okay?”
Dylan’s eyes glowed as if they were lit by a fire from within. “What do you think? Of course it’s okay. I’ll pick you up at the bakery and you can tell me where you want to go from there.”
“Can we do item number ten?”
“You want to go to Philadelphia?”
“I want to see the Liberty Bell. I learned about it in school but I’ve never seen it in person. Is it really and truly cracked?”
“Yes, it is, but the bell itself is much smaller than you might think. I thought it would be huge, but it’s only three feet tall.”
“Do you think we can go?”
“I don’t think my parents would let me drive to Philly without an adult in the car, but I’m sure my dad would tag along if we agree to buy him a cheese steak.”
“Can I have one, too?”
“You can have anything you want. If the Phillies are in town and we can get tickets, we can cross off item number twenty-seven, too. Your first professional baseball game.”
“I love baseball. When I was little, Sarah bought a battery-powered radio we kept hidden in our room. Late at night, after our parents were asleep, we would listen to music and learn the words to all the latest pop songs. She left the radio behind when she moved out. I use it to listen to broadcasts of the Phillies games. The announcers make me feel like I’m sitting in the ballpark with them. I never imagined I would be able to see the team play in person. You make me feel so special, Dylan.”
“You are special. I know you believe no one is better than anyone else, but you’re special to me, Rebecca.”
Her parents made Rebecca feel loved. Dylan made her feel wanted. Dylan seemed to be courting her. Rebecca didn’t know whether to ask her to stop or encourage her to keep going.
“See you next weekend.”
Rebecca got out of the car and waved good-bye to Dylan. She skipped up the road, pausing once to watch Dylan’s little yellow car head toward town.
“Was that Dylan Mahoney?”
Rebecca squealed in fright. “Who’s there?” she asked, resisting the urge to run.
Esther Hershberger, a basket of blackberries in her arms, stepped out of the wooded area next to the fence. “Only me.”
“Esther, I didn’t see you there.” Rebecca let out a deep breath but didn’t allow herself to relax. How much, if anything, had Esther seen?
Esther had chosen to spend her rumspringa participating in activities organized by the church. Hay rides, volleyball tournaments, and Sunday sings. While Rebecca ventured into the world, Esther would remain behind.
“I’ve been waiting for you. Mr. Lapp said you should be home soon and I wanted to be the first to greet you. Do you think we could make a blackberry pie after church?”
“I don’t see why not.”
“Was that Dylan Mahoney’s car you were riding in?”
“Yes, it was.”
“You didn’t pay her to drive you, did you? You know we’re not allowed to exchange money on the Sabbath.”
“I didn’t have to pay her. She drove me for free.”
“She has always been a good friend to you.”
“As have you.”
Esther linked her arm around Rebecca’s as they walked up the road. “Did you enjoy your time away?”
“Very much.”
“What did you do?”
Rebecca hesitated. She wasn’t obligated to tell her parents or anyone else what she did during rumspringa. They could ask, but she didn’t have to answer. Her weekends were her own. She could do with them what she wished, spend them wherever she pleased.
Rebecca regarded her friend and saw no cause for concern. Esther was the daughter of her family’s closest neighbors. They had known each other since they were very young children and were constant fixtures at one another’s homes. She felt certain Esther would never wish her harm, no matter what the Ordnung dictated.
“There’s something I have to tell you.”
“What?”
“Can you keep a secret?”
Esther tilted her head, a tendril of blond hair spilling out of her bonnet. Her eyes glittered at the prospect of a shared confidence. “Of course I can.”
“Promise me.”
“I promise. What’s the secret?”
“I was kissed.”
Esther clapped her hands in delight, then abruptly began to pout.
“What’s wrong?” Rebecca asked.
“Tobias will be jealous.”
“Your brother? Why would he care that I was kissed?”
“Rebecca, are you really so blind? Tobias has always fancied you. He was planning to tell you so tonight at the sing.” Esther blushed. “I guess I can’t keep a secret after all.”
As they walked up the road, Rebecca thought about what Esther had said. Tobias was a nice boy—hardworking and firm in his faith—but Rebecca had never thought about him as anything other than a friend. The love she felt for him was one a sister might feel for a brother. Could she grow to love him as a wife would a husband?
Rebecca didn’t know how to reconcile her conflicting emotions. On one side, there was Dylan and the promise of an uncertain future. On the other, there was Tobias and the certainty that life as she knew it would not change. Which side should she choose?
Kissing Dylan—spending time with her—was fun. But it felt unfair. When she kissed Dylan, she felt it in her body. Dylan seemed to feel it in her heart. Rebecca felt as if she were toying with Dylan’s emotions. Such behavior was unacceptable. It was settled. There would be no more kisses unless they meant as much to Rebecca as they obviously meant to Dylan.
“You’ve returned.”
Rebecca smiled at the evident relief in her father’s voice. “Were you worried?”
He held her at arm’s length, a twinkle of delight in his soft brown eyes. “I knew you would be safe with the Mahoneys. Your mother, on the other hand—”
“Nonsense,” her mother said, shooing him away so she could give Rebecca a hug. “I knew I could count on you not to get into mischief. You did behave yourself, didn’t you?”
“Yes, Mama.”
Undoubtedly remembering Rebecca’s confession about being kissed, Esther giggled and pressed the basket of blackberries into Rebecca’s arms. “I’ll see you at services, Rebecca. I’ll come back later to help you with the pie. If you would like a ride to the sing tonight, Tobias and I would be happy to take you.”
“That would be fine.”
“Good-bye, Mr. and Mrs. Lapp. See you soon, Rebecca.”
Rebecca noted the pleased look her parents shared at the mention of Tobias’s name. The beginning of courtship was a subject not openly discussed with family or friends. Parents respected their children’s privacy and, if need be, pretended not to know their offspring had begun the selection process.
Rebecca valued her parents’ opinions. Their expressions indicated they approved of Tobias and his yet-unstated intentions to woo her. If they considered him a worthy lifemate for her, why didn’t she?
Tobias was the spitting image of his sister. He was as handsome as Esther was beautiful. They had the same corn silk-colored hair and bright blue eyes. When Rebecca looked into those eyes, though, she didn’t feel the same way she did when she looked into Dylan’s. She felt fondness when she looked into Tobias’s eyes. When she looked into Dylan’s, she felt something close to—
“I’m going to see to the horses.”
Rebecca walked out of the house and headed to the barn. She heard voices when she approached the half-open door. On second thought, she heard only one person speaking, not two. Uncle Amos was talking to himself. He seemed to be practicing a speech. Listening a little longer, Rebecca gathered that Uncle Amos was rehearsing his sermon. He would give the short lecture that opened services; her father would deliver the longer one later in the day. During the time between the two talks, worshipers would comment on what was said and sing selections from the Ausbund, an ancient book of hymns.
“Guder mariye, Uncle Amos,” Rebecca said, making her presence known.
“Guder mariye, Rebecca. Have you come to help your old uncle or humor him?”
“Both.” Rebecca held a burlap bag open while her uncle filled it with a combination of oats and sweet feed. One of Uncle Amos’s horses nudged her shoulder with his muzzle. “Coming, Goliath,” she said, reaching up to stroke the white patch on the big horse’s face. “Be patient.”
She watched as Uncle Amos picked up the feed bag and strapped it around Goliath’s neck. The horse crunched on the bag’s contents as if he had not eaten in a week. Rebecca knew better.
“Slow down, greedy. I know Uncle Amos fed you yesterday. Have you brushed and combed the horses yet, Uncle Amos?”
“Not yet,” he said, filling another feed bag. “I was saving that chore for you.”
Rebecca selected a brush and comb from the collection of tools that hung on one wall of the barn. She slipped the comb into the pocket of her apron and began to brush the horses, a task that gave her nearly as much pleasure as it did the animals. Rebecca could almost feel Goliath sighing as she ran the brush over his coarse hair.
“Uncle Amos?”
“Yes, child?”
“We have always been close, have we not?”
“Ayuh.”
The one-word answer perfectly summed up their relationship. Rebecca fondly remembered the many nearly wordless afternoons they had spent fishing, reading, or tending to the animals. Uncle Amos didn’t talk much, but his meaning was always clear. When he did speak, his words were powerful. They carried much weight. Both in his family and in his community.
“May I ask you a question?”
“Of course, child. What is it?”
“You’re older than Papa, but he is the one who is married with children. Why are you still clean-shaven after all these years while Papa is the one who has a beard down to his chest? Could you find no one to marry?”
Uncle Amos was quiet for so long Rebecca began to think she had offended him. She was trying to concoct a suitable apology when he finally answered her question.
“There was someone dear to me when I was a young man, but we were not meant to live as one.”
Rebecca combed Goliath’s thick black mane. “Was it not God’s will for you to be together?”
“You’ve heard the story of the country mouse and the city mouse? That is what we were. I could never leave the country for the tumult of the city. I tried to leave once, but the noise and excitement proved too much for me. I prefer the quiet of the farm and our people. In the city, I felt lost. It was rush, rush, rush all the time and I couldn’t hear myself think. I returned to the life I knew best. The only life I will ever know.”
“If you had the chance to make the choice again, would you make the same one?”
“The decision you will have to make is yours and yours alone. Don’t live your life based on what I would or would not do. Live your life, Rebecca, not mine.”
Rebecca had long admired her uncle. She wanted to be like him in every way—kind, gentle, understanding. Would she also be as he was now—alone with no one to love?
Dylan poked her head into the projection room. “What film are you showing?”
“Typical summer blockbuster,” Willie Sgoda replied with a shrug. “Lots of car chases, explosions, and bad dialogue.”