Royce (62 page)

But then he went and married that white trash girl and when he married the negra he knew the boy didn’t understand about protecting the family, he wasn’t like him.  It was the family name he had to protect, his father had stressed that.  That’s why his father didn’t care about Hennie and the kids he had with her; they didn’t have the Harrington name, and he agreed with his father. 

“Why are you so upset with him?”  Hennie asked him.  This was after Royce disappeared and they’d talked about it many times and Walker would tell her, “I can’t believe he just up and left like that, no word, no nothing,” and this day she asked again. “Look Wally he has his reasons for leaving, you know what his ex-wife did.  Who knows what he’s feeling?  Why are you upset with him for doing what he thinks is best?”  They were relaxed and naked in bed after loving each other.  “Because if he hadn’t married the girl he wouldn’t have to run off like that, if he’d just kept his family together none of this would have happened!  It isn’t right that’s why!  The way he’s doing it, the way you and I did it was right!”  Walker got up and was pacing. Hennie was comfortable and propped up in bed with the cover draped over half her body.  They were old but they’d never stopped loving or pleasing each other in bed and had always had a passion between them. 

They were comfortable together and could talk about anything and had lived this way for years.  Walker would come over for dinner at least three to five times a week, telling Allison he was working late and the nights he stayed with Hennie to Allison he was on business trips and he’d stay for days and he loved being in Hennie’s bed.  He went to her with love in his heart and heat and passion between his legs. 

He didn’t have a chauffeur because he didn’t want another soul to know what he was doing and that enabled him to hide his lifestyle.  He had two cars parked in the parking garage at the office, an older not so new car, usually a Cadillac that he drove to Hennie’s and he’d park it in the driveway that ran alongside the house.  There was a little yellow one car garage off to the side and in back of the house, he’d drive up as far as possible until he was close to the garage and his car was out of sight and Hennie had a screened in back porch where she kept beautiful plants.  They’d sat out there many a morning or evening drinking coffee and talking, but once he parked he’d walk in through the screened porch and through the back door.   And sometimes he would stay and sometimes not, and if he didn’t stay he would eat dinner, spend time with them and then he’d drive back to the office and hop in his expensive car, usually a large luxury Mercedes sedan.  Then he’d drive to the ranch and pretend he was just a man getting home late from work. 

But he was use to talking to Hennie; they’d been talking and sharing since they were nineteen years old.  He really didn’t talk to Allison, she seemed so young and naïve and she wanted her world just the way it was where she didn’t have to deal with anything, her favorite line was, “Oh I don’t know about that, whatever you decide Walker,” and when he did try and talk to her she just didn’t get things quick enough for him, and this day he was doing what he always did with Hennie, he talked, said what was on his mind. 

“He wasn’t supposed to marry her and give her or those children the Harrington name, it’s the name that’s important...You and I did it right, it doesn’t matter how many children we had together they are Johnsons, they are not Harrington’s!  We didn’t taint the Harrington name with Negro blood!”  He said voicing how he felt and then he looked at Hennie and saw the horror on her face. 

“Wally tell me you don’t really feel that way,” she said tears in her eyes, and he couldn’t deny it.  He did feel that way and he could see his father turning over in his grave seeing Negro children with the Harrington name.  To Walker you could love a person of color, have babies with a person of color, but you don’t marry them and bring them into the family.  Even if he could’ve married Hennie he never had any intention of doing so.  The thought had never crossed his mind to marry her, so when Tammy came to him in the library and started talking about family legacy and what the historians would write about them he went easily along with her.  They had to get rid of the taint, and that was Joy and her children, it had to stop now.  He had to nip it in the bud, get them out before they started to procreate, but it was Tammy who gave him the idea how.  Once Royce had married he thought it was done, the family was ruined and he fumed and was angry until Tammy came in the library. 

Walker saw Hennie looking at him horror stricken and he couldn’t change how he felt. Hennie looked at him and she could see he did believe it and she cried and said, “Get out Wally!  After all these years, after all these years I thought you didn’t marry me because of the bigotry of the south.  That we could be killed or our children hurt, but not because you believed it, that you felt the same way.  Oh my god, I’ve been a fool, I’ve been a fool,” she sobbed, he went to her.  “No, don’t touch me, don’t…,” she said moving away from him, “Get out!  Get out!  And don’t come back here, don’t come back to this house, you are not welcome! You hear me Wally!  I don’t ever want to see you again!”  Walker dressed and left still believing he was right, that the way they’d done it was right.  Have babies with your negra mistress but don’t give her or the children she bears your name, and he thought Hennie understood that. 
She’ll come around
,  he thought. 

After that he tried to see Hennie and she refused to see him and his children asked, “Daddy what happened between you and momma?”  And he’d say “It’s just a misunderstanding on something she should understand,” and he’d try and see her, wanting to be back in her arms but sure of the path he’d taken, and Hennie would tell him, “You hurt me more than you’ll ever know, I cannot see you,” and he’d hmmph and stick to his stubborn guns.  Determined to right this wrong on the Harrington legacy, determined to rewrite history and thinking she’d come around, but year after year went by and Hennie wouldn’t see him or talk to him. 

Their children he still talked too, but their relationship was strained because he wasn’t welcome at the house anymore, and he missed Hennie, missed what they had together, but year after year he was sure he was doing right and stubbornly and doggedly went after Royce.  This couldn’t go down in history, this couldn’t be the path the Harrington line went down.  But he missed Hennie, missed her in his bones, missed her in his soul.  His soul wept for her and she wouldn’t see him until too many years had passed and it was too late.  She was gone for good and so was Royce, his baby boy was lost to him.

…I realize now I was a fool and the things I did to you and what I did to him, I pray god will forgive me.  I tried to fix it with him, but my boy ran from me, he ran Hennie and you won’t talk to me, won’t see me and I love you, love you so much.  I didn’t realize how much until you were gone, gone for good and I love you, love him and he ran from me. My boy ran from me for what I’d done to him, all because of a name, because of the family name…,

Royce paused when he read that, paused and stared at that last line and reread it over and over.  He had his answer,
the family name,
his father made his life hell for years because of ten letters strung together, a word,
the family name
.

And Walker also feared that if history looked into the Harrington tree and down his branch, not only would they see what Royce had done marrying a black woman, but if they scratched deep enough they’d see what he’d done.  They’d find Hennie and his children and they would rewrite history for the Harrington family, and his great family, the proud heritage his family deserved would be destroyed because of him.  That’s why that summer day when Tammy came in the library talking about family legacy, and preserving it, he had more than one reason to join with her, his racism, the family name and the discovery of his black mistress.  And for Tammy, she really didn’t need his money, she had Royce’s money.  What she needed was an adversary.  She knew it was crazy, a downright outrageous idea, but when he bit she felt emboldened, it was okay to feel this deep hatred.  She wasn’t crazy, his father felt the same and from there she did the rest.

…Now I see I was wrong and can’t make it right, and by the time you get this I’ll be gone and I won’t have a chance to see my boy and tell him that I love him.  That I’m sorry, so sorry for what I did to him and his family, but I’m telling you Hennie, at least I can tell you, tell you I’m sorry my love.  Sorry from the bottom of my heart and that I loved you from the minute I saw you dancing at Freddie Macs.  You were so beautiful and I loved you, please believe that.  Forget those awful words I said, I love you and our family was just as important to me as the other,

I love you,

Wally,

Royce saw the date, it was written a week after they’d fled to France and he cried and wiped tears. “I don’t know what he did to you but what he said to me broke my heart and I never looked at him the same and I hadn’t seen Wally in eight years.”

Royce looked at her teary eyed, “He sent assassins to kill my wife and children, and we’ve been running all over Europe and Africa to escape,” he felt Hennie deserved the truth.  Hennie’s mouth dropped and her eyes got big, “Oh my, I can’t fix that Wally, I can’t fix that,” and a picture fell on the sofa table by the window.  “That’s Wally he won’t leave me alone, he won’t let me rest,” she said smiling and Royce thought,
don’t go acting crazy on me, this is already insane enough
, and he just looked at her not knowing what to think. 

Hennie could see he was in turmoil and she had to give him the truth, “So you see to Wally it was okay to have relations with me but not give me his name,” she’d give him the truth but not those awful words that Walker said.  Royce looked at her with tear filled eyes, “So if I hadn’t married Joy, if I had kept her…,” and he wanted to say hidden, “If I hadn’t married Joy and given her the Harrington name he wouldn’t have bothered us?”

Hennie nodded, “It’s a shame I know and I can’t explain it no more than you can understand it, it seems absurd that a man would hold on to such antiquated notions in the twenty first century. I don’t understand it either,” and Walker’s hurtful words and the way he spit them out in offended anger that his boy would marry a black woman came fresh to her mind and she felt the pain of it anew.

Just then Holly Ann stood at the doorway, “Dinner is ready momma,” she said quietly, “I wasn’t sure if you were ready or not.” “Thanks baby,” she looked at Royce, “Stay, have dinner with us, everyone is dying to meet you,” Hennie said, and he nodded and helped her from her chair when he saw her struggling a bit to get up and he walked with her to the dining room.

Everyone was standing around the table and they came to introduce themselves, “I’m Hollis and this is my wife Elise and our children Hollis Jr. and Nia.” Royce shook hands and in Hollis he saw his father’s smile, then Pauline introduced herself and her family, and she was a light skinned Hennie with blue eyes like his father, and then there was Thomas and his family, and he was a mix of Hennie and his father with dark hair and eyes, then Holly Ann came again smiling at him and now he saw the resemblance to his father too, she was more Hennie, but he could see his father in her face too.

“Wallace, Collette and Warren all live around the country, New York, California, Maryland and Holly Ann she live in Austin but she came up this weekend for a visit, but the rest they live here close by,” Hennie said, and they all welcomed him and they found places at the table.  Hennie was at the head and Hollis was at the other end and he found a side spot and the table was large and laden with food, and his first thought,
Joy would love this, she loves a big table with lots of food and people to feed
.  Everyone sat down and started passing the food, there was ham, fried cat fish, collard greens, macaroni and cheese, potato salad, yams and fresh baked bread  The children were at a children’s table in the family room and he could hear their lively chatter, it was slow at first at the adult table but then the talking started.  He didn’t know what to say and think, his mind was full, these were his siblings, his brothers and sisters and he heard bits and pieces of conversation as he ate and the food was delicious.

Hennie had been with his father longer than his mother, longer than he’d been alive, his father had a black mistress, his father was Louie too. 
He was like his father
, and his father went after him for doing the same thing he’d been doing,
all to save the family name
!  He couldn’t believe that it was too incredible to believe. “This is good,” he said finally breaking from the litany of dialogue running nonstop through his mind, “Joy would love this,” and they looked at him and he saw the huge smiles.  “She loves good food and lots of people,” he said proudly and he saw them smiling brightly, and he didn’t know that they’d been watching him, taking glances at him.  They knew the implication of this, of him in their house, at their table, he could either accept them or not.  His mother had come, sat with Hennie and cried as she learned of them and they’d wondered for weeks what would become of that, but him it looked like he’d chosen to accept. 

“Well Royce what are you going to do now that you’re back?”  Hollis asked and he told them, and someone asked where he’d been and he told them but he didn’t tell them why, and Hennie smiled and said, “I know Wally it feels good to see this,” and a few of them gave her a look, and Pauline said, “Momma stop that you keep scaring the kids with that,” and she gave Royce an exasperated look, “She keeps saying daddy is talking to her,” and Royce could tell she and most of them didn’t believe her and he laughed and they did too.  But he did notice a lone leaf on one of the plants behind Hennie shake a bit, but he chose to ignore it and think it was errant air flow that caused it and they stared at him a little too long. “Sorry it’s just that you look so much like daddy,” Holly Ann said, and he looked down, “Yeah, I get that a lot,” and Royce knew he hadn’t forgiven his father and he didn’t think he ever would, especially after seeing what he’d been doing behind their backs his whole life.