Rome: A Marked Men Novel (34 page)

“I put that baby in there, Cora. Anytime you want to talk about it, you want to marvel at it, you let me

know. Yeah?”

She let out a little laugh and dropped her cheek on the top of my head.

“Yeah, Rome.”

I gave her a squeeze to let her know I was serious and decided while I was on my knees in front of her

I might as well take advantage of the situation, so I stuck the tip of my tongue into the dip of her navel and

felt her shudder against me.

“I love you, Half-Pint. Love that little baby. You understand where I’m at with all of that?” She nodded

a little but I was working my way south with my tongue and I don’t think she had the ability to form words

anymore. I breathed out a little puff of air against her cleft that I could see was getting slick and ready for

me. “I know you aren’t on the same page as me just yet, Cora, and for right now I’m happy enough we’re

reading the same book. Eventually you have to turn the page, though, you got me?”

Her fingers got tighter in my hair and I knew there was no one else on this planet I would willingly get

on my knees for, but this girl with all her mouthy ways and swirling eyes, I would do it for her whenever

she asked and even when she didn’t.

“I got you, Rome.” And she did. She had me any damn way she wanted me, and I was more than happy

to show her since she was already naked and wet for me.

CHAPTER 15

Cora

“Why don’t you just admit you’re changing the subject and that we aren’t going to find a house until our

kid is walking?”

He sounded disgruntled and I couldn’t really blame him. We had looked at three houses this morning

before I had to go to work, and none of them fit the bill. I was having a hard time explaining to him that I

had an ideal idea of what a home should be, where I wanted to be with him and raise our kid. I spent so

much time bouncing from relative to relative while Dad was deployed, I knew exactly what I wanted and I

wasn’t going to settle, even if it made my guy all kinds of grumpy. It wasn’t just about finding a house, it

was about finding a home and starting a family, and I had to fully let go of the fear that was still holding me

back to do it.

“Just be patient, big guy. It’ll come along. Besides, that last place only had a one-car garage and we both

know you don’t want to leave the Harley parked on the street.”

He grunted at me and scowled. I was glad he finally had the truck back because he didn’t want me on

the back of the bike in my current condition and it was like pulling teeth to get him in the Cooper. At least

having him drop me off at the shop on his way to the bar didn’t result in an argument.

“I leave it on the street now.”

“But you bitch about it all the time and it hasn’t even started snowing yet.”

He knew I was right, so he just grunted again and tapped his long fingers on the steering wheel. He had

been getting impatient with me lately. Not outwardly, but I could tell every time he told me he loved me that

it did something to him when I didn’t just say it back. I just couldn’t. I wanted to. I was sure I did in fact

love him more than I had loved anyone else ever, but giving him that … I simply couldn’t do it. Seeing this

man, this warrior, on his knees in front of me, ready to give me anything and everything I ever wanted, I

knew I had to get over it. Kick the fear to the curb and just
know
Rome Archer would never undo me the

way Jimmy did. I couldn’t say it to him, but I knew I could show him how I felt, which was why I had

asked him if I could borrow his dog tags for a couple days.

I was changing the subject because I was tired of fighting about the house even if I thought he was sexy

as hell when he was disgruntled.

“So can I have them or not?”

“I don’t understand what you want them for.”

I was surprised he didn’t still wear them since they had been a part of his uniform for so long. I figured

since he kept the hair and the strenuous workout routine, he would have kept the tags as well. Plus I

thought they would look hot around that thick neck. Maybe I would ask him to put them on for me

sometime and nothing else.

“It’s a secret. I promise not to lose them and to treat them with all the respect and reverence they

deserve. Stop being Captain No-Fun because we didn’t agree on a place and hand them over.” I tried to

keep my voice light and teasing, but I couldn’t shake his black mood.

He cut me a look out of the corner of his eye and pulled the big truck to a stop in front of the shop. I

could already see people milling around in the waiting room and Nash waved at us since he was out front

smoking.

“They’re in a box in my underwear drawer. Grab them the next time you’re over at the apartment. Just

put them back whenever you’re done with them.”

I giggled a little and leaned across the seats so that I could wrap my arm around his neck and pulled him

down so I could kiss him. Even when he wasn’t overly happy with me, he never stopped me from loving

all up on him. He was pretty much a gentle giant, not that I would ever dare tell him that to his face.

“Why do you even have an underwear drawer? You don’t ever wear underwear.”

He shrugged a broad shoulder and kissed me back.

“Right, so I have to have a place to keep it all in because I never use it.”

“You are so weird.” I pushed open the door and hopped down onto the curb. I was going to blow him a

kiss or maybe flip him off just to be ornery, but since I forgot my purse and he was nice enough to get out

and bring it around to me, I decided I would just kiss his face off some more instead. I heard Nash chuckle

at the spectacle I was making, heard Rome groan against my mouth while he curled a hand around my ass,

and heard a voice I never thought I was ever going to hear again say my name.

“Cora?”

I slid back to my feet from the tip of my toes and peeked around the solid wall that was my guy to see

the last person on earth I ever wanted or expected to see again. I felt Rome’s arms tighten reflexively

around me and Nash moved from his spot by the front window to come stand next to us. I turned in

Rome’s rapidly stiffening grip to face my ultimate worst mistake. I felt that big body go absolutely rigid

behind me, but thankfully Rome didn’t say anything. His irritation was like a lash in the air as Jimmy took a

hesitant step toward us.

The years had been kind to Jimmy. He was less skinny and more filled out. He had way more ink

curling over his arms and neck than I remembered and he wore it well. His sandy-brown hair was artfully

tousled and topped by a cool, plaid skully-cap. He was the epitome of Brooklyn cool and I hated to see that

he had genuine regret shining out of his dark brown eyes.

“Jimmy. What are you doing here?”

“Uh … you didn’t answer any of the e-mails I sent you and your dad refused to give me a number to

reach you. I just …” He trailed off and I realized he was staring at Rome and not really looking at me. He

sighed deeply and shook his head. “I wanted to see you. To get some kind of closure and tell you how very

sorry I am for what I put you through. I know it’s too little too late, but I just had to do it now that I

understand how wrong it was.”

If Rome was stiff before, he turned into a statue behind me now. I pulled out of his grip and walked

toward my ex. The blood that was rushing to my head was making me deaf and the shining light of my past

staring me in the face was making me blind. I think Nash said something to me, think Rome called my

name, but all I could see was Jimmy and all I could feel was everything I had wanted to do to him, all the

things I had wanted to make him realize five years ago. Seeing him thrust me back in time even if I had

strong hands trying to hold me in place in the present.

Operating on ancient rage and embarrassment, I pulled back a hand and socked him in the gut as hard

as I could. I owed it to him, but it didn’t do anything to make me feel any better. In fact all the old feelings

of betrayal and hurt were starting to fade simply because they were irrelevant in the face of how ridiculous

it was that he thought I would want to hear anything he had to say. I was still mad, but for other reasons. He

let out an “oof” and doubled over. I contemplated smacking him across the face as well, but Nash got to me

first and handed me off to my chuckling guy, who locked down my flailing arms and cut off the steam that

I felt was pouring out of my ears. I should be overwhelmed with joy that I had escaped the life I would

have had if I had stuck with a guy like Jimmy. But all that old duplicity and sting had greatly affected my

ability to give everything over to the man I now considered my life, and I was all kinds of newly furious at

Jimmy for that.

“Fuck you, Jimmy. I don’t need an apology from you. I don’t need anything from you. As far as I’m

concerned, you got exactly what you deserved. You’re wasting your time here.”

Rome growled behind me, which was all kinds of alpha sexy, and ran a soothing hand over my arm. I

was shaking, and it made me mad that Jimmy could affect me in any way still. Apologizing for shattering

my young heart into a million pieces was just laughable, like any words could go back in time and undo the

damage he had done, could fix the current predicament I found myself in with Rome.

“You actually deserve a shit ton more, but considering her condition, I’m not going to let her at you.”

Rome sounded gruff and even less happy than he had been originally.

Jimmy’s gaze widened and then flicked over my now slightly extended belly. I wasn’t huge but I was

obviously rounded out more than normal and clearly pregnant. I wanted to hit him again when he looked at

Nash and asked:

“You’re knocked up?”

Nash choked on a laugh and hooked a thumb at Rome.

“You might wanna look at the guy holding on to her, genius. Not mine.”

Jimmy’s eyes got huge when he took in the protective stance Rome had taken behind me. He looked at

me, at my belly, and then back up to the thunderous expression of the man standing behind me. It irritated

me to no end that he automatically assumed Nash would be the dad just because of his outward appearance.

Why hadn’t I ever realized how shallow and awful he was before I had fallen in love with him? Gross.

“Seriously, Cora? What the hell happened to you? This isn’t like you. You used to be nice and funny.

The old you would have forgiven me in a heartbeat, and we could have gone and had a beer and a few

laughs for old times’ sake. You loved me.”

Oh, the nerve of him. How did I ever think anyone that stupid was my Mr. Right? I could read between

his lines. The old me would have been head over heels to have another shot at being with him and he could

have used me for a quick hookup to soothe his battered ego. Uh, no thank you.

“
You
happened to me, Jimmy. You have the nerve to talk about how I loved you? How about because

of you I can’t love someone else? Where is the apology, the regret for that?”

I heard a sharp intake of breath behind me. I knew I needed to stop—that I was risking ruining the

thing that mattered—but in my fury I was stuck in a cycle of past and future, anger and remorse, and there

was no turning back.

“Cora.” Jimmy rubbed the back of his neck and looked at his feet. “We were young. I was immature. I

never meant to hurt you that way. You were the first girl I ever loved. Can’t we just grab a coffee or

something and mend some fences. I really am sorry.”

“No. Just because you’re sorry doesn’t mean I’m obligated to accept your apology. It sucks you came all

this way in search of absolution, but it’s not my job to offer it to you. I don’t owe you anything. I never

did. You were just too stupid to see that I was offering you the world and then you decided to toss it away.

Never again, Jimmy. I’ll never do that again.” My voice dropped an octave and my chest heaved up and

down. “The embarrassment, the loss of the only family I thought I had, it made me lost, made me search

and search for some kind of perfect I’m never going to find. You ruined my idea of happy-ever-after.”

When my words hit Jimmy they made him shudder, and they made me feel free. But any satisfaction

was brief, disintegrating as what I had just said hit me square in the chest. It was too late, I couldn’t force

the words back in. I turned to look at Rome, and those blue eyes had gone dull, distant, his face like stone.

For five years I had needed this moment to let go. But now that the anger was starting to bleed out, I

knew the harsh words I had thrown out in a blind rage had hit the wrong target.

Rome had offered me everything over and over again, and still I’d held back. I’d never been absolutely

clear to him why I was so hesitant to just hand my heart over, and here I was laying it all out there to the

last guy who deserved any consideration. Jimmy might have damaged my ability to freely offer my love,

but I had to be accountable for my part in being scared to give everything over to Rome. I knew we were