He didn’t give them a minute alone. Vicki waited until his back was briefly turned so she could clamber off and race around the corner, hiding behind the bales as she scrambled to straighten her underwear and jeans. It was like some weird nightmare she couldn’t wake from.
“You’re moving out?” Joel repeated.
“Steve and Trevor have room for me in their place.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“I think I do,” Jesse snapped. “I don’t want to talk about it. The decision is made.”
Vicki died a little more inside. She might not like Jesse very much, but this was her fault as well, coming between the brothers. Another part of why staying in Rocky wasn’t a good thing.
Joel stepped into view and looked her over. “You okay?”
“Embarrassed,” she whispered. It wasn’t how she wanted this session to end. And it certainly wasn’t how she wanted Joel and Jesse to end, either.
Joel held out a hand, wrapping his fingers around hers and tugging her to his body. He kissed the top of her head. “Don’t be. Honestly.”
“Yeah, don’t be embarrassed,” Jesse cut in. “It’s not as if I’ve never seen ass—”
“Fuck off, Jesse,” Joel ordered.
The slam of another bale smacking into the bed of the pickup truck below rang like a warning klaxon in the silence that followed. Jesse glanced over one final time, then deliberately turned his back and returned to dropping bales.
Joel led her to the ladder and went down first. Vicki glanced over her shoulder to see Jesse staring after her, anger in his eyes, frustration and…a touch of sadness?
She swallowed hard and faced the wall. It wasn’t her place to make him happy. In fact, she couldn’t understand how the two brothers had turned out to be so different from each other. Guilt poked her even as she admitted she wanted nothing further to do with Jesse.
If she weren’t in the picture, would they be able to patch things up?
Falling in love wasn’t supposed to hurt this hard.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Twenty-one candles crowded the surface of the cake. Vicki stared, not so much in shock at the number of them, but at the entire celebration raging around her.
The Colemans had insisted on hosting her a birthday party.
“You need help?” Robbie leaned harder against her leg. He’d basically jumped her the moment she and Joel had walked into the big ranch house. Joel raised a brow, but said nothing when Robbie determinedly separated their linked fingers so he could take control and tug Vicki off.
And now, after the meal was over, she still had a cling-on by her side.
“I can help, if you’d like. I’m a good candle blower-outer.”
Beth laid a hand on her son’s shoulder. “Let Vicki have some of the fun, okay?”
“I don’t mind.” Vicki smiled at the little guy. She stopped herself before sharing she’d never blown out candles before, deciding last second her lack of experience wasn’t worth bringing up. She was getting the chance now, no matter that the occasion was bittersweet.
She’d done it, Joel and her. She still didn’t love the beasties, but she was comfortable enough around horses to survive the summer.
She left in just over two weeks.
Little fingers poked her arm. “You making a wish or somethin’?”
Vicki nodded. “I am. You ready to help me?”
Beth caught Robbie as he shoved himself too far forward. “Whoa there, mister, you don’t need to be kissing the cake to do your job.”
Laughter curled around the clan, and in spite of not having made a wish, Vicki leaned forward and blew.
Besides, there was only one wish in her heart these days.
The enthusiastic helper at her side probably took out most of the skinny candles, but she did see a couple flames waver and extinguish after she aimed their direction. All except one, which flickered then roared back to full potency.
She drew a breath to try again then paused, surprised by the chorus of whistles and catcalls that broke out. Lots of grinning faces greeted her, Joel being jabbed in the ribs good-naturedly by Blake.
What the heck?
One quick tug and she had Robbie’s full attention. “Why are they laughing?”
He pointed his finger at the still-burning candle. “You missed one. That means you got a boyfriend.”
Her gaze shot to meet Joel’s, and he smiled, sweet and sexy at the same time. Her heart broke a tiny bit further even as she soaked in the experience.
“Well,” she said to the group at large. “I guess I do.”
Cake and ice cream consumed, the crowd sauntered outside to take in the fresh spring air.
“Thankfully the winter was short.” Hope leaned her elbows on the railing and watched the nephews kick a soccer ball around the yard. Nearby, Blake and Jaxi’s nearly two-year-old twins were pretending to be horses, whinnying and pawing the ground with their feet. “Damn, those kids are cute. There should be a law against it.”
“Makes you want some of your own?” Vicki wasn’t ready for kids, no matter how cute they were.
Hope shrugged. “I think I’m immune for a few years. There’s still a lot of things Matt and I want to do before we start a family, especially with the shop finally making some money instead of sucking my savings dry.”
“Kids are fun, but yeah, not something to rush into.” Jaxi stroked the soft curls of the baby held against her chest in a cotton hammock contraption.
Vicki glanced over her shoulder at the truck pulling into the yard. “More company?”
“Karen.”
Once again guilt hit. Joel knew her time was limited, but they hadn’t shared that with the rest of the family yet. He had told her to wait. He’d obviously been in on the plans for the birthday party and probably didn’t want to blow the surprise with announcements she would shortly disappear.
A group split apart to greet Karen. The woman expertly backed the horse trailer into position at the gate one paddock over from where the kids played. She jumped from the truck cab and waved, pulling on a pair of gloves as she walked to the trailer door.
Hope wandered off toward the guys while Jaxi shifted position as well, moving closer to where her girls continued to laugh and play, ignoring the grown-up action.
Vicki caught herself smiling at their antics as she turned back to focus on Joel. “New horses?”
Joel lingered at her side, his hand resting on her lower back as he propped himself against the railing. “One. Dad bought a stud at auction last week, and Karen offered to pick him up when she grabbed the couple the Whiskey Creek clan purchased.”
Vicki leaned into his touch, watching as the trailer was opened. Movement showed through the open windows as the horse shuffled position. The sound of his discontent in being enclosed escaped, stomping hooves and other more vocal complaints.
It was incredible to think she could be here, experiencing this. Because of the things Joel had done, the things he’d taught her. The way all of the family had taken her in.
Except one.
She looked around the yard, not wanting to bring up the sore spot, but curious if Jesse had cut and run for the day or if he would show up at some point to make his obvious displeasure clear.
“He’s gone.”
Vicki glanced up.
Joel’s arm was around Vicki but his focus remained on the action by the horse trailer. “If you’re looking for my sad-assed twin, he left a message he had something really important to do this weekend, and he’ll be back when he gets back.”
Guilt. Strong and powerful. “I’m so sorry—”
“Stop it.” She had all his attention now. Joel cupped her cheeks and kissed her hard before capturing her gaze, the blue in his eyes reflecting the spring sky. “Remember? We’ve had this conversation. His actions are his responsibility. You’ve done nothing wrong, so ignore him. His loss, anyway, he missed some awesome cake and ice cream.”
She forced a smile because he was right. This was—
A terrible metallic screech sounded, jerking their attention to the trailer. Karen’s truck rolled forward, shuddering to a stop a few feet from where it had begun. The ramp Karen was guiding the horse down bounced unsteadily, and she threw out her hands to catch her balance.
The horse spooked, lurching upright on the lead rope she held and lifting her feet off the ground.
“Shit.” Joel took off at a dead run, little puffs of dust rising from under his boots.
Blake and Mike moved into position to help when a loud gun-like blast rang out, and the horse freaked further. He lowered his head and stormed forward, pivoting as soon as he’d cleared the roof of the trailer. Karen clung to the rope, but she was holding a wild beast.
With a space open between the ramp and the gate, the animal was set on escape. He spun, and this time Karen flew free, arms spread, legs wide. She landed with a sickening crash half-on, half-off the ramp, her cry of pain sharp and bitter.
The horse made a break for the main road, which put him on a direct path past where Vicki stood against the railing. The lead rope hung loose from the horse’s halter. His tail was up, nostrils flaring. He tossed his head and snorted out his fears.
Robbie darted from under the fence in hot pursuit of his rolling ball, and Vicki’s stomach fell.
The world flipped into slow motion, it really did. There was no time to think, only do. She was the closest person by far, with the men gathered by the trailer and Jaxi burdened with the baby. Out of the corner of her eye she saw one of the guys sprinting toward them, but she knew he’d never make it in time. Instinct kicked in, born of all those lessons Joel had made her repeat again and again.
There was a sickening taste of fear at the back of her throat, her limbs gone numb. In spite of her rising nausea, she rushed forward. There was nothing else she could do.
The fact a far more experienced horsewoman had just been thrown didn’t change the urgency. All she saw were dangerous front hooves slamming into the ground, and Robbie in the way.
He finally heard the shouting. He lifted his head as he twisted, face gone white as the horse bore down on him.
Vicki dashed between the horse and the boy, waved her arms and shouted. With macabre fascination she watched the beast rush toward her, waiting for the pain of impact to arrive, fully expecting to be trampled.
Only he jerked to a stop and sniffed hard. Her heart might have stopped as well. She had gone stone cold, and everything around them faded away until it was just her and the horse in a tiny corner of the world.
Terror of a different sort rocked her, images of the beast lifting his forequarters then slamming down on Robbie. To stop him from rearing she clutched the lead rope, snatching at his mane with the other. “Easy now. Whoa.”
Her feet were firmly on the ground, anchoring the horse in position. Her ploy seemed to have worked, at least until he lifted his head. With her hands gripping the lead rope and his mane, she rose into the air. Dangling from his head she might have been a fly for all the attention he paid her.
He took off without lunging, though. Moving down the lane at a slower speed, Robbie left behind.
The demon-possessed horse had calmed, but still seemed intent on fleeing from the ranch with Vicki stuck like a burr to his neck. She hung on for dear life while being jolted as he trotted out the main gate. She couldn’t get her fingers to release.
“Come on, it’s okay. Easy.
Easy
.”
Like she’d learned to imitate the Coleman cowboy stroll, she did her best to copy how Joel always talked around the animals. Smooth and calm. A total lie from what she felt inside, but she got the words out. Somehow? They sounded as if she was taking a stroll in the park.
“Easy, boy.”
Then a miracle happened. The hell horse slowed to a walk.
Hope rose. Her heart still pounded enough to make the blood roar in her ears, but the beast was settling. His head dropped low enough her feet touched the ground.
“That’s it. Good boy.”
She glanced back toward the ranch. She thought she’d heard another horse, and sure enough, there was Joel, riding bareback, a coil of rope in his hand. He approached slowly, but the wild beastie in front of her twitched.
“He’s scared of you,” she warned.
“Easy, boy. Easy.” Joel glanced at Vicki. “Hold him steady. You’re doing great.”
He slipped off Trigger and paced forward cautiously. He
shh
ed the horse a few times as he got closer, wrapping his hand over hers on the rope. “You can let go now.”
No. No, she didn’t think she could. Her fingers were locked in that position for the rest of her life. Vicki nodded, though, and slowly stepped away, the smooth fibers pulling from her crooked fingers as she increased the distance between them.
Joel’s attention remained fixed on the runaway as he spoke soft and slow. “Lead Trigger back to the barn,” he ordered.
After the hundreds of times she’d crawled on his back, after dealing with the panicked new beast, it didn’t seem nearly as scary anymore to grasp hold of the sedate Trigger’s mane and tug him toward the barn. “Come on, big guy.”
Her stomach tightened as they moved, but now it had nothing to do with the horse at her side. Whatever had caused her phobia in the first place had been replaced with confidence she knew what to do.