Riverbreeze: Part 2 (24 page)

When she didn’t respond immediately Robert continued, “Help me upstairs, will you?”

“Oh!” She came out of her ruminations. “How badly are you hurt?”

“Not that bad, but I do need you to massage my leg. Help me upstairs so I can lie down.”

“You are not hungry?” Elizabeth asked quickly, studying his haggard face.

“I am, but I’ll eat later.” He suddenly smiled gently at the concerned look on her face. “Do not look so worried. Everything will be all right. Let us go upstairs.”

* * *

On the stairs, Robert asked her what she had done all day.

She let out a huff. “Peel and slice apples for drying.” She complained. “I thought we would never finish!” Of course she didn’t tell him about what she and Evelyn had found in their governess’ trunk.

Robert laughed. “Your hands are probably as sore as my leg is, but come January and February, you’ll be grateful for those dried apples. Abby makes the best dried apple tart I’ve ever eaten!”

A twinge of jealousy went through Elizabeth. If he loved Abigail’s cooking so much, why didn’t he marry her?

“Ow!” Robert cried out when she clumsily stepped on his foot. He glared at her, saying, “Be careful, please.”

“I’m sorry.” She mumbled. That really was childish of her. But she could not get Abigail out of her mind. What would happen if Abigail had heard what they had said? What she had said? The part about not being witches.
Dear Lord in Heaven, keep Evelyn and me safe.

Finally Elizabeth and Robert made it to their bedchamber. When they reached the bed, Robert fell onto it as if his body weighed a ton. He let out a groan. “Oh, that feels good.”

Elizabeth went around the room, closing the shutters on the window and lighting candles. Would he even notice how she had tidied the room today and refreshed the linens on the bed and sprinkled them with some of the lavender water? Probably not; men never noticed things like that.

She paused to smile back at him. “You had a rough day today, didn’t you?” She asked gently, remembering how he hadn’t wanted to answer Abigail’s question about trouble at the village. She wondered what could have happened. Obviously the servant hadn’t been with Robert and Jamie, but perhaps they had left him at the servants’ cottage. And if they hadn’t brought him back, well, he deserved whatever had happened to him in punishment for running away.

He sat back up, rubbing his face. “You don’t want to know.” He said.

“Of course I do.” She said, moving to one side of his legs. She touched his thigh and he dropped his hands. It was then that she noticed how haunted his eyes looked. “What happened?” She asked softly. “Where is your servant?”

“He’s dead.” His voice was without inflection.

Elizabeth gasped, covering her mouth with her hands.

And then as if a thundercloud had erupted, anger filled Robert’s voice as he continued, “The stupid kid!” He exploded, his neck and face turning red. “The stupid, stupid idiot!” He tore off his shot pouch and flung it past Elizabeth onto the floor against the wall so that it landed with a crack. Elizabeth jumped, her eyes wide, turning aside quickly. It could have hit her! “He had to run away!” He tore off the other pouch with as much fury as the first one, but at the last second, caught himself before throwing it. “Then he had to get caught!” With tightly controlled movements he placed the pouch of gunpowder and his pistol on the bed next to him.

Elizabeth remained silent, holding her breath, realizing how raw his emotions were. He was exhausted, she thought, physically and emotionally. She hadn’t worried about him going to the Indian village like Evelyn had worried about Jamie, but perhaps she should have.

He looked back up at Elizabeth, his face a mask of bitterness. “Opechancanough wouldn’t trade. He
wanted
guns; I
couldn’t
give him my guns! He wouldn’t accept the hatchets Jamie and I brought him, but he kept them, all right,
the bastard
. He wouldn’t even accept my knife…!” He pulled it from his belt and held it up and it took all of Elizabeth’s nerves to remain still. “What was I supposed to
do
?” He slapped the knife down next to the gun and gunpowder. Then he raked his fingers through his hair, breathing deeply several times.

Elizabeth remained silent still, her heart pounding frantically in her chest. She didn’t really believe he wanted an answer and she didn’t know what to say anyway. She knew nothing about savages.

His voice was much lower when he continued, “I thought I wouldn’t care; I thought I could walk away without a second glance. Jamie and I talked about it all the way home. We even prayed for the boy! Can you believe it?” He let out a bark of self-deprecatory laughter. “Me! Praying! Something I haven’t done in two goddamn years!” He shook his head. “And Makki…I thought I could…” He stopped short, realizing with horror what he had just said and what he had been about to say. He stared at Elizabeth, his heart pounding.

“Who is Makki?” She asked in a small voice. All kinds of thoughts were rushing through her head. Was this person another friend like Owasewas? Or an enemy? Or a woman? The name meant nothing to her, was neither masculine nor feminine. But he had shut his mouth so quickly, he had incriminated himself with his sudden silence.

But on the other hand she needed to give him the benefit of the doubt. He was in anguish over losing his servant. That was clear to see.

“I wasn’t going to tell you.” He said, hanging his head in shame, covering his face with his hands again. “I’m a coward, really.” He looked back up at Elizabeth. “I couldn’t stay to watch them murder Connelly and I wasn’t ever going to tell you about Makkitotosimew.”

“Mak-ki-to-to-…?” She couldn’t finish the name. It was too difficult and her thoughts were in turmoil.

Robert looked at her with infinite remorse. “Makkitotosimew.” He repeated the name. “She was my lover.” He said flatly.

Elizabeth felt like she was going to faint. “Oh God.” She whispered, her throat tight, her eyes welling with tears. Her sight blurred. She didn’t know what to do. What do you do when your husband of less than a week tells you that he had a savage for a lover? As if in slow motion she started to turn away from him so he couldn’t see her tears. And she thought she had to worry about Abigail. How foolish was that?

“Lily…” Robert said pleadingly, reaching his hand out to her. “Lily, please…”

She kept her back to Robert, hugging herself, trying to maintain control.

Finally he pushed himself up and with much effort took the two steps to reach her. Taking her upper arms into his hands, he turned her to face him. She kept her face averted; she didn’t want to look at him, but when he put a strong finger under her chin, she couldn’t stop him from tilting her face up to him.

Finally she met his gaze. His eyes were full of earnest remorse. “I said good bye to her today.” He said. “I told her our relationship is over, that I’m married now and I can’t see her again. Please understand. I was devastated after Kathleen died and she offered comfort… and for a few hours once a month, I could go to her and forget everything…”

Elizabeth finally found her voice. “Do you love her?” She asked quietly.

“No.” He answered, using his thumb to wipe a tear from her cheek. “We had fun; we talked…” He smiled sadly in remembrance. “I taught her English.”

“And you had relations with her.” Elizabeth said bluntly, looking him straight in the eye.

Robert blushed, but he didn’t look away. “Yes, that too.”

“Did you lie with her today?” Elizabeth kept her chin up. She had to know this even if it killed her.

“No! For God’s sake, no!” He clutched her upper arms and actually shook her a little to make his point. “I’m married to you, Elizabeth! I would not break my vow to you. You are the one I want.” He ended on a gentle note, cupping her face as if he were handling a fine china tea cup.

Two tears rolled down her cheeks. Want, he had said, not love, you are the one I want, but she didn’t really love him yet either. “I want you to want me.” She said softly.

“I do. I promise.” He gently wiped the tears away.

“And do you promise to never see her again?”

“Of course, I promise never to see her again. I told you that already. I even told Owasewas that I would probably never go to his village again, but he was still welcome to visit us and I hoped he would.”

She nodded marginally. “I like Owasewas. I hope he still comes to visit too.” She said softly.

“If he doesn’t, I shall miss him immensely.”

Elizabeth heard the sadness in Robert’s voice and it tugged at her heart. All these events that had led up to this moment hadn’t been his fault. He had just been thrown into these situations and he had done the best he could. He hadn’t wanted to get married and he probably hadn’t wanted to give up his lover; but he had been the gentleman. He had married her—and so far it had been good—and he said he had given up his lover—and possibly one of his best friends too. He had done it all for her and to honor his adoptive father.

She looked up into his eyes and came to a decision. She would overlook the fact that he had had a savage lover. It would be hard for her to forget, but he had done this sinful thing before he had ever met her. And she wholeheartedly believed him when he promised he would never see the woman again.

“I never did get my hello kiss when you came home.” She mock scolded him, pouting prettily.

He let out a surprised laugh. “I guess I was distracted. Forgive me?”

She shrugged one shoulder, pretending to reject him, but inside she smiled to herself.

“Would you like a kiss now, Mistress Bassett?” He asked, playing along.

“I would love a kiss right now, Master Bassett.” She said, affecting a flirtatious pose.

He laughed, saying, “You are a minx, wife.”

Elizabeth dissolved into laughter also, pleased with the compliment.

“Come here.” He growled, holding his arms out.

She immediately threw herself at him, not caring about his sore leg this time. He caught her around her waist as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. He tried to brace himself, but failed and they fell back onto the bed. Elizabeth let out a little shriek, but Robert could only grunt. Her full weight had landed squarely on his stomach and chest.

The counterpane let off a waft of lavender.

He turned his head to sniff. “What is that smell?”

She pushed herself up but didn’t get off of him. “Lavender water. Evelyn and I went through our governess’ trunk and she had packed some lotions for us.”

“It smells very nice.” He said as if he were surprised that he could like something like that.

She chuckled. “I’m glad you like it.”
Much better than dirt and animal skins, isn’t it
? She thought.

“I do. Thank you.” He said softly, tucking her hair behind her ear.

“You’re welcome.” She whispered. And she leaned down to finally get her hello kiss.

Robert held her close and Elizabeth felt the strength of his arms and the softness of his lips. The kiss was tender at first and she felt her toes curling inside her dainty leather slippers, but then as his hunger grew, the kiss became more intense and he rolled them over so that he was over her now.

She clutched at his shoulders as he continued his assault. She felt the soft, supple deerskin shirt under her fingers. The smell of the shirt was not pleasant, but she ignored it, guessing it would be discarded fairly soon.

She pressed closer to his body, panting into his mouth. One of his hands splayed over her back, then grabbed a fistful of her hair. Thank God she had taken the time earlier to bathe and wash her hair and dry it by the fire. She knew how soft and silky it was and imagined that that savage’s hair couldn’t have been as clean and beautiful as her own.
Yes, feel how much softer mine is; see how much prettier it is.

He broke the kiss, but moved his lips across her cheek and she let her head fall back, exposing the long line of her lily-white neck. He kissed her there tenderly, taking in deep breaths of her fragrance.

“You smell wonderful.” He breathed. “What is that scent? ‘Tis different from the lavender, is it not?”

She smiled triumphantly. “Almonds and rose petals.”
Isn’t this so much nicer than bear grease?

He growled playfully, nipping at her earlobe. “You smell good enough to eat.”

She giggled on cue. “You can have all you want.”

He tightened his hold on her, pressing her small breasts against his chest and kissed her on her mouth again. The pressure was almost painful but she reveled in his attentions.

Just when she thought she was going to faint from lack of oxygen, he broke off, whispering huskily. “I want you naked.”

She smiled a lazy smile and reached up to run her fingers through his hair at his temple. “I want
you
naked.” She moved her hands down to the hem of his buckskin shirt and started to lift it.

He laughed, and she knew she had pleased him. “Patience, patience, my wife.” He said, but obliged her by sitting up and taking the shirt off. He tossed it on the floor, then picked up the gun, the knife, and the pouch of gunpowder and placed them on the floor too.