Resurrection Blues (4 page)

 

SCENE 2

 

EMILY: My god! Look at this!

 

SKIP: Yeah!

 

EMILY: That snow. That sun. That light!

 

SKIP: Yeah!

 

EMILY: What a blue! What an orange! What mountains!

 

SKIP: What's the date today?

 

EMILY: Seventeenth.

 

SKIP: Huh! . . . I think she's getting the divorce today and I completely forgot to call her.

EMILY: Well maybe she'll forgive you.
Looking into distance
.—This is absolutely awesome. How pure.

 

SKIP: A lot like Nepal—the Ivory Soap shoot.

 

EMILY: Like Kenya too, maybe . . . Chevy Malibu.

 

SKIP: The Caucasus, too.

 

EMILY: Caucasus?

 

SKIP: Head and Shoulders.

 

EMILY: Wasn't that Venezuela?

 

SKIP: Venezuela was Jeep.

 

EMILY: Right!—No!—Jeep was the Himalayas.

 

SKIP: Himalayas was Alka Seltzer, dear.

 

EMILY: Oh right, that gorgeous bubbling fountain.

 

SKIP: I think the bubbling fountain was Efferdent in Chile.

 

EMILY,
closing her eyes in anguish:
God, what a mush it all is!
Looking out again
. Human beings don't deserve this world.
Spreading out her arms
. I mean look at this! Look at this glory! ... And look at us.

 

 

CAPTAIN: Everything is fine?

SKIP: Beautiful, thank you very much, Captain. Our crew will be arriving shortly . . .

 

CAPTAIN: We will help them up . . .

 

 

Mr. Schultz is already arriving.

 

EMILY: Mr. Schultz?

 

CAPTAIN: Very famous; his company is making the medicine for the feet.

 

EMILY AND SKIP,
uncomprehending:
Ah!

 

EMILY: Oh!—athlete's foot!

 

CAPTAIN: And for the ears . . . to remove the wax.

 

SKIP: Really. And what connection does he have with . . . ?

 

CAPTAIN: He is cousin to General Barriaux . . . very important.
A wide gesture front
. This is the perfect scenery, no?—for the crucifixion?

 

EMILY,
laughs:
For the what?

 

SKIP: Thank you, Captain . . .

 

CAPTAIN: Yes! I must go down; I am speaking English?

 

SKIP: Oh yes, you speak very well.

CAPTAIN: How you say “lunch”?

 

SKIP: Lunch? Well . . . lunch.

 

CAPTAIN: We also. You say lunch and we say lunch.

 

EMILY: That's really remarkable.

 

CAPTAIN,
pleased with himself:
Thank you, Madame.

 

 

EMILY: That wonderful?—a great spot for a crucifixion!

 

SKIP,
empty laugh:
Yes . . . Darling, what exactly did Atcheson tell you?

 

 

CAPTAIN: Ah, here is Mr. Schultz!!
To Henri:
Here is our director!

 

HENRI,
to Emily and Skip:
How do you do?

 

CAPTAIN: I am honored, sir. My wife and daughter are taking “Schultz's” every month!

 

HENRI,
trying to get back to Emily:
. . . Thank you, but I have very little to do with the company anymore.

 

CAPTAIN: You also have very good pills for the malaria.

 

HENRI,
turning to Skip:
I am Henri Schultz . . .

EMILY: Emily Shapiro. Director. This is my producer, Mr. Cheeseboro. We're making a commercial up here.

 

HENRI: So I understand. I believe the General will be coming up; I have something I'd like to say to you both if you have a moment . . .

 

EMILY: We're just laying out possible backgrounds . . .
Turning to Skip
. . . . Although I still haven't been told what exactly we're shooting . . .

 

SKIP: . . . May I ask your involvement, sir? Or should I know?

 

HENRI: Well let me see—my involvement, I suppose, is my concern for the public peace or something in that line.

 

SKIP: I don't understand.—If you mean good taste, Miss Shapiro has given the world some of its most uplifting commercial images. And luckily, the beauty of this location practically cries out for a . . . ah . . .

 

HENRI: A crucifixion, yes. But if you can give me five minutes, I'd like to speak to you about . . .

 

EMILY: What is he talking about?

 

SKIP,
to Henri, walking her away:
Excuse us, please.
To Emily
: What exactly did Atcheson tell you?

 

EMILY: Practically nothing.—Phoned from his limo and said to get my crew right over to Kennedy and the company jet and you'd fill me in when I got here . . .

SKIP: That's all?

 

EMILY: Wait a minute—yes; he sort of mentioned some kind of execution, but I didn't get the product . . .—What is it, somebody making an execution movie, is that it? And I grab some footage?

 

HENRI: Candidly, I wouldn't rule out a certain danger . . .

 

SKIP: There is no danger whatsoever; they have troops all over the mountain.

 

CAPTAIN: . . . Everything is absolutely covered.

 

EMILY: Why?

 

SKIP: Well, let's see. There is this sort of revolutionary terrorist.

 

EMILY:
Terrorist?
A real one?

 

HENRI: Actually, he himself is apparently not a . . .

 

SKIP: The man is totally vicious! His gang have killed some cops and blown up government buildings. And he goes around claiming to be the . . . like, you know, the son of god.
Turning on Henri nervously
.—Is there something I can help you with, sir . . . I mean, what is it you want?

 

EMILY: I'm confused—what's the product?
To Henri:
What are all those soldiers doing down below?

SKIP: They always have soldiers . . . even around weddings . . . rock concerts . . . anything.

 

HENRI: This is a bit different, they are there in case of a protest.

 

EMILY: Protest about what?

 

SKIP: Sir? We are here under an agreement with General Barriaux, and you are interfering with our work; I'm afraid I really must ask you to leave . . .

 

 

EMILY: What's this now?

 

SKIP: They're putting up a little set.
To the soldiers:
Very good, gentlemen, but don't do anything yet, okay? Just sit down and wait a few minutes, okay? We'll be with you in a few seconds, okay?

 

 

HENRI: You know it's to be a crucifixion?—

 

EMILY: A crucifixion. Really. But what's the product?
Calling to the soldiers:
Wait gentlemen! Don't do anything till I tell you, okay?

 

No, wait, fellas; for one thing, I've got to decide on the camera angle before you build anything, okay?

 

 

Oh well, go ahead.

 

 

Will you kindly explain what the hell is going on here? And what am I shooting, please?

 

SKIP: . . . It's a common thing with murderers here . . . they attach the prisoner . . .

 

EMILY: Attach? What do you mean? To what?

 

 

Please stop that!

 

 

CAPTAIN,
patting his own stomach:
Also you have the best for the gas . . . “Schultz's”!

HENRI: Captain, please—I inherited the company but I have very little to do with running it. I am a philosopher, a teacher . . .

 

SKIP: Darling, you must understand—this fellow has blown up a number of
actual
buildings, so they're quite angry with him . . .

 

EMILY: Wait, Skip—I don't know where I got the idea but I thought somebody was shooting a movie and we were just hitchhiking onto it . . .

 

SKIP: There's no movie.

 

EMILY: So . . . is that a cross?

 

SKIP: Well . . .
Takes a fortifying breath
. In effect.

 

EMILY: It's really a
crucifixion
?

 

SKIP: Well . . . in effect, yes, it's very common here . . .

 

EMILY: “In effect”—you mean like with nails?

 

HENRI: That's correct.

 

SKIP: It is not! I was told they'll most likely just tie him onto it!
To Emily:
They do that quite a lot in this country. I mean with death sentences.

 

EMILY: But he's not actually going to like . . . die . . .

SKIP,
frustration exploding:
I cannot believe that Atcheson . . . !

 

EMILY: Atcheson told me to get here, period! He didn't say “die”! Nobody dies in a commercial! Have you all gone crazy?

 

SKIP: We're only photographing it, we're not
doing
it, for god's sake!

 

EMILY,
clapping hands over ears:
Please stop talking!

 

 

Prego, Signor . . . No, that's Italian. Bitte . . . not bitte . . . stop, okay? What's Spanish for “stop”?

 

HENRI: Stop.

 

EMILY: Yes.
To the men:
Stop!

 

 

Gracias. Muchos.
To Skip:
I'm sorry, Skip—I think maybe I'm just out.

 

SKIP: Now you stop being silly!

 

CAPTAIN: This is going to be a very good thing, Madame. It will frighten the people, you see.

 

EMILY: And that's good?

CAPTAIN: Oh yes . . . it's when they are not frightened of the government is when they get in trouble. Of course, it would be even better if they were allowed to say whatever they want. Like in the States.

 

HENRI: Well that's a surprise, coming from the police.

 

CAPTAIN: Oh, but is a very simple thing—if the troublemakers are allowed to speak they are much easier to catch.

 

 

The General has arrived!

 

 

HENRI: You may start a bloodbath in this country, sir, I hope you realize that.

 

SKIP: You are endangering this woman's career!
To Emily:
This could move you into a whole new area. I mean just for starters, if you shot him against the view of those incredible mountains . . .

 

EMILY: You mean on the cross?

 

SKIP: Emily dear, you know I adore you. Have I ever steered you wrong? This is a door to possibly Hollywood. There's never been anything remotely like this in the history of television.

 

EMILY:—And when are we talking about? For it to happen? Just out of curiosity.

SKIP: Toward sundown would be best, but it has to be today.

 

EMILY: Why?

 

SKIP: . . . Well, basically . . .

 

EMILY: Don't tell me “basically,” just tell me why.

 

SKIP: Well, basically because the story is bound to jump the border and we'll have CNN here and ABC and every goddam camera in Europe. So it has to be done today because we have an exclusive.