Ready to Love Again (Sweet Romance #2) (2 page)

“I can’t thank you enough, Clark, seriously. You don’t have to be so kind.”

“Seriously, Alyssa, think no more of it and start cleaning the kitchen. We’ll attack the main room together once we’re finished here.”

“Clark, you are the best!” I gave him a smile as I opened the door that led back to the kitchen.

I entered the kitchen with a newfound sense of purpose and a spring in my step. I think it was safe to say I had found my first friend in the area and that helped ease a little of the sadness in my heart.

***

We cleaned for what seemed forever. The bathroom shone clean from top to bottom and Clark had even cleaned the toilet—not a job you can normally get a guy to do. The kitchen was now also spotless—I had cleaned the cupboards, drawers, worktops, the fridge, freezer, and the cooker. Oh and the microwave too—now it was fit to cook in.

To cook in. Oh my god. I hadn’t done any food shopping. I hadn’t had time. I’d have to put up with take-out for one night. That wouldn’t be good for my diet, but still, it was a one-off.

We shared the cleaning and airing out of the main room and soon the musty smell was minimal. I could bear it until I got a new bed. I had my camp bed roll laid on top of the bed for now and felt sure that I could cope temporarily.

“Thank you so much, Clark,” I said as we sat sipping the instant coffee I had made.

“No thanks necessary,” he said as a blush crept across his cheeks.

I looked at him more closely now that we were sat taking a rest. He had brown shaggy hair that was cut short and kind of spiky. His eyes were a pale blue-green. His body wasn’t all ripped abs, as far as I could tell, but he was lean and well-muscled underneath his Ramones t-shirt. If I were to guess, I’d say he was around twenty-five. There was no doubt about it, girls would think Clark was handsome. Sexy, even. But for me, my heart belonged to another.

“Well, at least let me treat you to a take-out,” I said as I snapped out of my daze.

“Okay. I know some good places, it depends what you want.”

“What’s good around here?”

“Chinese!”

“What would you order?”

“Chicken chow mein or sweet and sour chicken.”

“Okay, you phone them and place the order. We can share a bit of both of those if you want to?” I asked as I wondered how we would eat them when I had no cutlery or crockery.

“Sure. And they come in these awesome little boxes you can open out into a little cardboard plate and they have chopsticks too, so no worries about not having anything to eat with.”

“You read my mind,” I said, surprise evident in my voice.

“I saw your kitchen cupboards and draws, they’re bare. But you’ll get that sorted. There’s a great little place in town, cheap too.” He smiled at me. “Not that I’m saying you’re cheap,” he added quickly.

“I know! Thanks, I’ll check them out tomorrow.”

“Don’t forget to take your car. You won’t be able to carry things from town.”

“About that…” I hesitated to tell him the truth.

“What?”

“I don’t actually have a car. I said that in the store so you wouldn’t think I was completely lame.”

“Oh. Well, no worries, I’ll drive you.”

“No, you won’t. You have the store to open.”

“So I take a couple of days off. You’re doing me a favour. To be honest, the store belongs to my father and trade is slow at the moment.”

“Oh, well, then even more reason not to close for another day. You’ll miss any trade and some money is better than none.”

“Trust me, my folks don’t need the extra money. They’ve made their money and sit pretty on it,” Clark explained.

“Oh. Well…I still don’t want to be a burden.”

“You aren’t.”

That seemed to conclude the conversation because he pulled out his iPhone and dialled for take-out.

Chapter Two

It had been two weeks since I’d moved into the bedsit and I was getting restless. I hadn’t gotten a job and I still hadn’t sold my house—this meant I was going to be confined to this shithole bedsit longer than I had hoped was necessary.

Clark had become a regular fixture in my life. He was always popping round for a chat or to bring take-out. We had an easy friendship. I hadn’t thought I’d make friends fast moving here—and granted, Clark was the only one so far—but I was glad to have some company.

I had friends back home, plenty of them, in fact. But every single one of them pitied me now, I had seen it in their eyes. One of the reasons I had moved so far away was to get away from the pity that followed me round like a bad smell. I’d bump into someone and they’d give me that look, the
‘I’m at a loss for what to say to you’
look. It was inevitable, unavoidable, and weighed down on me like a millstone around my neck.

At least Clark didn’t pity me. He didn’t really know me or my past, so he didn’t look at me like they did. Clark was a kind and gentle soul. I knew he’d feel sorry for me if I told him about my past, which was one reason not to tell him. I didn’t want to hide who I was, I just wanted to escape from being her for a while. I’d tell Clark when the time was right. He’d only been in my life two weeks, I didn’t have to spill my guts so fast. When I eventually tell him, I’m sure he’ll understand why it took me a while. Won’t he? I sure hope so!

***

I finally got some luck by way of a phone call from my old employer. They had been so understanding when I left. Claire, my old boss, rang me on the Monday morning of my third week away from home.

“I had a feeling you would need gainful employment once you got settled, so I called in a favour and got you an interview. I can’t get you the job, only you can do that, but the interview is set for Wednesday at 9 a.m.,” Claire said.

“That’s great, Claire, I don’t know what to say. Thank you so much. I have been looking for work but it’s so hard to get an ‘in’ in this industry unless you know the right people.”

“I know, that’s why I called in a favour over at Emerging Butterfly. You will get the job on your own merit, but it’s good to know somebody who knows somebody, right?” she said. I could hear the smile in her voice.

“It sure is. Thank you again. I’m so sorry I left at such short notice. You really didn’t have to do this for me,” I replied, tears springing to my eyes.

I couldn’t help but feel sad that I had to quit my old job. I truly loved working for Peterson’s and somehow knew I would never find a job that would quite live up to it.

“Hey, it’s understandable. I would probably have done the same in your shoes. I will give you a glowing reference, of course. You were a model employee. You’re hard-working, dedicated, loyal…You really shouldn’t have a problem getting this job. They’re an up and coming company—not the most well-known yet, but they are getting their name out there. They have a position to fill and I’m sure you will be the star candidate.”

“Thank you for everything, Claire, really. You were the best boss and I loved my time working with you. You taught me everything I know and I really respect the hell out of you.”

“I know and the feeling is mutual, lady. You just go in there and show them what you’re made of!”

I couldn’t help but feel like crying. Claire had gone out of her way to get me a job interview even when I had left her in the lurch. I hadn’t given any notice of needing to leave. I just went into her office a month after the funeral and said I needed to go. She had understood and had given me a month’s pay like she would’ve if I had worked my notice out.

“I’ll be sure to ring you and tell you how it went,” I said as I felt a pang of emotion I couldn’t quite name.

“You better!” she said with a laugh.

“Oh I will. I’m nervous as hell now. I have two days in which to prepare myself for this interview. I haven’t had a job interview since I started working for you seven years ago.”

“You’ll breeze it. You’re smart, funny, and anyone can see you would be an asset to their company. Just make sure you have an updated CV and that you’re dressed to impress.”

A CV was something I didn’t have. I had worked for Peterson Press for seven years and before them, I had worked as a temp so I could be at a place for a few days, a few weeks, or maybe even a few months. It was going to be hard to make that look good on paper.

“Well, I ought to work on that CV today. I don’t have a printer so I’ll have to see if there’s a library that will let me print a copy.”

“They said you can email a copy to the lady who will be interviewing you. Do you have Wi-Fi?”

“Yes, they installed it last week.”

“In that case, I’ll email you all the details; the email address, the address of the company, etcetera.”

“Thanks, Claire. I couldn’t have done this without you.”

“Thank me by getting the job.”

“I’ll do my best,” I promised, to myself as much as to her.

“That’s all you can do. Call me soon. I’ll let you get on with interview prep.”

“Claire, before you go, thank you for everything. You are a good friend as much as you are my ex-employer. I can never repay your kindness.”

“Oh hush, woman. Call me when you get out of the interview, you hear me?”

We said our goodbyes and I booted up my laptop to write my CV and cover note for it.

I called Clark when he got off work and let him know I had an interview lined up. He was ecstatic for me and I hadn’t long got off the phone with him when I heard his car pull up outside.

I opened the door and let him in.

“It’s great that you have an interview but do you have an outfit? I know how women are when it comes to preparing what to wear ahead of time,” Clark teased as he walked by me and sat on the little couch in the main room.

“I have suits back from when I used to work for Peterson’s but I don’t have anything new, if that’s what you mean.”

“Let’s see some of the options then!”

“Okay, wait there,” I said as I walked into the bathroom with a pile of clothes in my hand.

***

After a few changes of outfit, a few changes of blouse to go with the suit we chose, I finally had an outfit to wear on the big day. I also had shoes, a bag, and accessories to make the look complete. I have a very minimalist style. I don’t do big clunky pieces of jewellery, I find them too tacky.

Clark stayed to go over my CV with me and he even chose which fragrance of mine he liked best for me to spray on the day.

I couldn’t help but feel nervous. I hadn’t had an interview since the one for Peterson’s, which, of course, was years ago. I knew that so much had changed since then and that this would not be easy—yet I was excited too. The prospect of a new job and new friends, maybe things were looking up for me since the downturn I’d taken when Ethan died.

Ethan. My heart panged at the memory of him. What would he make of all this? The old Alyssa, the one he married, wouldn’t have ever made such a ballsy move as to up sticks and move hundreds of miles from her family and home. But then none of this would have happened if he was still here. We’d still be married and would still be living in the same house, just round the corner from our families. Unfortunately, the ALS would still be progressing too. I wish with all my heart that none of this had happened, my life has been turned upside down and inside out, yet I couldn’t help but think he would be proud of me. He wanted me to move on and that is exactly what I have been trying to do
.

Chapter Three

At 8:45 a.m. I entered the building of Emerging Butterfly Publishing House. Looking around me, I saw a big imposing building with an ultra-modern look inside and out.

I walked up to the highly polished, black reception desk. I cleared my throat, as the receptionist was paying attention to her computer.

“Good morning. I have an appointment with Ms. Lynch at 9 a.m.,” I said quietly.

“Ah yes, Mrs. Young, please be seated and Ms. Lynch will be with you momentarily,”the receptionis
t—
or Skyla, according to her nameta
g—
said brightly.

“It’s Ms. Young,” I corrected with a smile.

“I beg your pardon, Ms. Young. Would you like a drink while you wait?”

“A glass of water would be good. Thank you.”

My throat was a little dry and I could tell it was only going to get worse with nerves. Claire had said I was good enough to get this job but even with my years of experience in the industry, it still didn’t guarantee a good result from this interview. Only time would tell, I suppose.

As I sat with my glass of water, a door opened and a gorgeous looking woman stepped over the threshold.

“Good morning, Ms. Young. Please, come this way.” She gestured towards her office.

I stood and smoothed invisible wrinkles from my skirt. I could feel a slight sheen of sweat on my hands as I did so.

I walked forward into the office and heard the door close softly behind us.

“Please, take a seat, Ms. Young.” Ms. Lynch gestured to the chair in front of her desk.

“Thank you,” I said as I took the seat.

I looked around the office and saw that whilst it may look all business at first glance, if you looked a little closer you could see the touches of home that had been integrated over however long Ms. Lynch had been with the company.

“So, Ms. Young, may I call you Alyssa?” she asked as she took the seat opposite me.

“Of course.”

“Well, you can call me Julieanne.” She smiled as she made herself comfortable.

“Thank you, Julieanne.”

“Why don’t you tell me a bit about yourself, Alyssa?”

I told her a bit about my old job as an editor for Peterson’s Press and a little about having only just moved to town. I didn’t want her to know too much about what brought me to town so I told her that I had just wanted a change. Nobody could know the real reason behind my move. Not yet.

I won’t lie and say the interview was a breeze—there were some hard questions that I took my time to formulate answers to. It seemed to have gone okay, though. Julieanne had been very nice and had treated me as though I was a friend rather than a prospective employee.

I stepped outside and called a cab. The sun was shining and I had a feeling of calm come over me. I had done all I could, and whether I got the job was now firmly in the hands of Julieanne.

I paid the driver as we pulled up outside Clark’s store.

“So…” Clark said as I entered.

“I think it went okay. She said I’ll hear by Friday. I was her last interviewee, so she’ll spend the next couple of days deliberating, no doubt.”

“Well, I think you’ll get it. I have every faith in you.”

Clark was so sweet. He knew next to nothing about me, yet he was willing to be as kind and helpful as he had been over the last couple of weeks.

“Thanks. I have to get home and out of this suit but I’ll swing by this afternoon at closing time. We’re going to the local bar for a drink, on me.”

“You won’t hear me complaining!” Clark said with a grin.

“Okay, see you at 5.”

I kissed him on the cheek and walked out of the store.

The sun was shining and I was smiling. I had done my best and that was all I could do. The rest really wasn’t up to me.

I went home and got changed into something a little more comfortable. Putting my iPod in its dock, I selected one of my favourite playlists. There was a lot on my iPod and I have to admit to having very eclectic tastes. There was a bit of everything from The Beatles to The Smiths, Curtis Stigers to Pink. I loved a bit of reggae and even some rhythm and blues but by far my favourite band was The Cure. From “Caterpillar” to “The Lovecats,” to “Lullaby” and “Just Like Heaven.”

When I was feeling low, listening to The Cure could really cheer me up. I had been feeling low a lot recently. No-one could blame me after all I had been through. But this was the new me. I wasn’t going to let myself wallow in self-pity.

I did a bit of housework and then called Claire around lunchtime.

“So, Julieanne is nice, huh?” She sounded chipper today.

“She really is. I’m not sure what my chances are but if they’ll have me, I can see myself being very happy there.”

“I’m sure you would be, darling. I have every confidence in you. When do you think you’ll hear back from her?”

“She said she’d let me know by Friday. I was the last person in for interview, so she has a couple of days to deliberate.”

“Well, at least you won’t have to wait long, darling.”

I could hear the smile in Claire’s voice and it was contagious. I could feel the hint of a smile on my own face.

“I know, I’m grateful for that at least. Waiting to hear back is torture—I’m not letting it get me though—I’m going to try and be as positive as possible.”

“That’s the way to be. Anyway, I should really get going as I have a meeting, but I want to hear from you on Friday as soon as you have news. If it’s a rejection, I’ll try another couple of contacts I have, but it may mean you having a longer commute to work. Let’s keep our fingers crossed, though.”

“I’ll call you the moment I know!” I promised.

“Good girl. I’ll talk to you then!”

We said our goodbyes and I ran myself a bath. I wanted to be ready to meet Clark at the store and if I didn’t get a move on, I wouldn’t be ready in time. I needed to work on my writing for at least an hour each day and I didn’t want to have to let that fall to the wayside today.

***

“I’m sure you’ll get the job,” Clark said as we entered the local pub, The Mermaid Inn, later that afternoon.

“Well, I sure hope so, but I’m not about to let it bring me down if not. I have skills—I can put them to use anywhere I guess—it would just be nicer to stay in the industry. This job sounds amazing too.”

“What is it you would be doing exactly?”

“Let’s get a drink and I’ll fill you in,” I answered as we walked to the bar.

We got a drink and found a table in a relatively quiet corner. Clark had brought me in here once before since I had moved in. It wasn’t a bad little place actually.

“Come on and fill me in then,” Clark said impatiently.

“Well, I don’t know how much you know about the publishing industry. I’m not sure where to start explaining. Do you read at all?”

This was something I didn’t know about Clark. Okay, so we hadn’t known each other long but I would normally have found out what books someone likes to read by now.

“I do read. I like a bit of Fantasy, a bit of Sci-Fi.”

“What authors do you normally read?” I enquired as I took a sip of my gin and tonic.

“Well, I have a bit of a passion for indie authors, actually. Being ‘in the biz’, as they say, you’ll know plenty of indies, I’m sure.”

I was glad he had a passion for indie authors, this would make explaining so much easier.

“Well, the job I interviewed for is actually a bit like a talent scout. I seek out the best indie authors, the cream of the crop, as they say, and I see if I can get them to sign with Emerging Butterfly. They aren’t the biggest publisher around, but I have researched them and they are an up and coming company. They have been doing very well of late. They have signed some really good authors.”

“So you get to read books for a living? I would love that!” Clark said with a grin.

“I knew you were a fellow geek the moment I met you, and I mean that in as nice a way as possible, of course.” I nudged him with my elbow and he laughed at me.

“This is great. You’ll be able to recommend new talented authors to me.”

“If I get the job, that is.”

“You will. I know it.”

***

It turned out Clark and Claire had both been right. I got a call from Julieanne on Friday morning asking me when I could start work. We agreed I would come by the office on Monday and sign my contract.

“You’re looking at Emerging Butterfly Publishing’s Head of Indie Acquisitions. That’s not my official title, but I like it!” I said to Clark as he arrived for our Friday night take-out and movie. This was the third Friday I had lived here and the third Friday that Clark had turned up with Chinese take-out from the same place we had used that first time we met. He also brought wine and a DVD. Tonight it was
Avengers Assemble
.

“That’s amazing. See, I told you that you had the job in the bag!” he exclaimed as he wrapped me in a one arm hug and placed a chaste kiss on my cheek.

“I rang Claire and told her earlier, she was ecstatic.”

“Who’s Claire?”

I forgot that Clark didn’t know much about my life before I moved here so I told him about Claire and my last job as an editor for Peterson’s Press as we settled down with our take-out.

“My job as an editor was really fun. I got to read books from all sorts of aspiring authors. I read all genres and I guess you can thank that job for my eclectic taste in books these days!”

“Sounds awesome. I love reading in my spare time, not that I get much of that with my mega busy social life.” He nudged my arm as he winked at me.

I could tell Clark wasn’t much of a social butterfly. He seemed to keep to himself apart from our take-out nights. I didn’t know why he wasn’t more social—he had friends, I’d often heard him talk about them—why was it he chose to have nights in with me instead of having the odd ‘lad’s night out’? Was it pity for the new girl in town? Come to think of it, why wasn’t he out there with a pretty girl on his arm? I guess I’m going to have to make it my mission to find out. I know I don’t know anyone around here very well just yet, but I am sure I’ll meet someone I can set him up with.

“So,
Avengers Assemble
is on the menu tonight, huh?” I said as I pointed to the box Clark had put on the dining table.

“It sure is. You said you were a fellow geek.”

“I sure am. It doesn’t hurt that there’s some eye-candy in it too,” I admitted.

“Oh really, who would that be? No, let me guess…Mark Ruffalo.”

“Ick no! Robert Downey Jr of course,” I laughed as I took in the look on Clark’s face.

“You like the older man? Hmm…”

“I do. Well, not too old, just a few years.”

“A few years?” he scoffed as he spat some of his beer on the table in an effort not to laugh at me.

“Okay, RDJ is the top of my age range. Ethan was only five years older than me.”

“Ethan? Who’s Ethan?” he asked as he grabbed a cloth and cleaned up the beer he had spat out.

Damn, I had slipped up. I really hadn’t wanted to bring up my past. I was trying to be the new me, the one where no-one knew what the old me had suffered. Or at least if they knew, it was because I chose to tell them, not to let it slip out in conversation.

“Oh, he’s an ex,” I tried to casually brush off my mistake.

“Oh. Okay. Least said, soonest mended, that’s what my Grandma always taught me.”

There was nothing that could be mended. The past was indelibly written on my soul and there was no escaping it for me. Sure, I could pretend. Maybe I could one day even convince myself to really be happy instead of this façade, but for now, I didn’t want to say any more on the subject.

“Something like that,” I said as I got up to put the DVD in the player.