I loved her more than she could ever know. It filled me with somedung the usual I suppose cosmic implications blumng my viswst. Hers was a mild infatuation; enough to inspire her to lubricity. The lubricity lasted for some thirty-seven days and then I was eased aside with the proper proportions of delicacy and firmness necessary to persuade a headstrong love-idiot. The irony was I had done just the same to another young woman a month before arid so in time I saw the tit for tat truth the slippery all-too-obvious: had I gotten what my cock said I wanted I would have been miserable in picas. That was when I grew up if not wise. That was when 1 wrote down all this nonsense that made my reputation about the ecology of love. Thanks to Geraldine another fingerprint squeezed tight into the old clay.
8 I do not understand why you care about Goldsmith. + Adust loyalty. Richard fumbled his tale to a condusion and dourly inspected his audience. There were seven in the lounge, a coffee tea and wine ranch corner rear the Pacific Lit Arts Parlor. I still do not understand why you cared about that old fart, Yermak persisted. He dunked his pasty white donut leaving islands of powder in his red wine. At twenty the youngest in the lounge Yermak looked on Richard with mild amusement. He was capable of anything. Bad writers murder us every day. The death of stinking prose. Ultrima Patch Thule silked to Richards defense. Were specking murder here, she said, thin voice distant as grass. Ultrima wore wire rimmed glasses eschewing even physical therapy for her dim eyes. Fap me for my green age but thats what Im saying, hes murdered us all. Yermak thinned his face in disbelief at their density. Richard saddened into silence looked down at his thumb and four fingers resting on the beaten oak veneer. He could not forget the grim determination of the pds face accusing and angry; now this. He tried to remember Goldsmiths last words to him and could not. Perhaps he should have specked the change. He was tired. Still shuddered from the rough morning. I wish to say Ah, fry that! Yermak spat, leaping away from the table and knocking his chair back with a clatter. Fap me my green and knock my words, I knew he had it in him, the fart. Raspberry. Say I to concern. 8k down, Jacob Welsh ordered. Yermak righted his chair and sat eyeshifting, nose aimed like a dog under his trainers whistle. Pardon my friends enthusiasm but he has an overstated point. I will admit, Ultrima said, Goldsmith has not charmed much lately. Nor shown his face. He killed them, Richard said. He was one of us and he killed them. Are we not concerned for our own? Not one of me. I am one, Yermak said, face contorted. May I quote the fart, I do not aspire. I be. Youve read and memorized, Ultrima accused with a glow smile. We have all, Yermak said at Welshs nod. I regret my callow. Richard, we admire your concern and age but it hardly matters that Goldsmith has done. He abandoned us even while he walked here, left us behind for the adulation of the combs, and no shady can ever respect him again, not even you. He was a friend, Richard said. He was a whore, Welsh said, demonstrating again that the unseen rope between himself and Yermak carded more than physical tension. Richard looked around the small group. Two who had not spoken yet, sisters Elayne and Sandra Sandhurst, seemed content to sip their tea and listen warily. Richard saw in Welshs and Yermaks eyes something he should have sensed already; here was anger that had not existed before he brought the news. Here was fear that their connection with Goldsmith would bring them trouble from the pd and the dty from where the power really lay in this landthe combs, the therapied. + Madame de Roche said it wouldnt be but the pd may not share her opinion. I have already been accused. Perhaps again? Sharp and dear: quicksand harassment isolation pain. Ive avoided these pictures since Gina and Dione. + Ive been asleep fifteen years. The sharp awareness faded and he closed his eyes for a moment bowing his head. He was a friend, Richard repeated. Your friend, Yerinak observed with false calm. Richard is our friend, Elayne Sandhurst said. Of course, Yermak agreed irritated they might believe he thought otherwise. He glanced reprovingly at Richard. + Thinks I bring discord weaken his place. Their places here are all so weak. They feel helpless. My apologies, Richard said. Apologizing for what? Jacob Welsh asked abruptly. Were certainly not sorry you told us. We are never sorry to have our opinions confirmed. Sandra Sandhurst lowered her knitting to her lap and drew her lips together. + Norn in judgment; only valid judgment the cutting of our threads. He is a world famous writer, and we all knew him. He was good to all of us. Yermak raspberried again. He slummed, condescended. Elayne said, He did not slum. Yermak stood up and knocked his chair down again. Such drama, Elayne said. She turned away disdainfully. Fap you, Vermak said blithely. Jacob Welsh leaned his head back and stretched. Weve had enough, my friend, he warned Yermak with barely concealed approval. Two upheavals are quite enough. I will not sit again not with these, Yermak said. Time to leave then. Welsh stood. Your news is useful, Richard, and I suppose thats enough. Your loyalty is admirable but we do not share it. I dont think its loyalty, Richard said. If hes murdered he should be therapied But we dont therapy even our worst enemies, Richard, Yermak intoned, leaning over him. I wouldnt put anybody through that. Better he were dead. Better still if he had never come near us. Richard nodded not in agreement but to wish them off. Dont forget the reading, Elayne Sandhurst said cheerily. Bring your best. I dont write anymore, Yermak said, sneering. Then read something from your dark past, Ultrima suggested. When Welsh and Yermak had left she turned to Richard. Honestly. Such children. Weve never really liked them here.. . they are so close, so weird. Like brothers or lovers yet they are neither, Elayne Sandhurst said. They need help, Sandra suggested and at that all but Richard laughed. Help was not something the untherapied sought. Help was a kind of death to those who cherished their flaws. + We should all live in shade not in the sun. Like insects.
My first name means god is with us. My last name means worker in golti I choose words instead; they are muck more valuable for being so common, and so misused and misunderstood. As for having god with me; I dont think so somehow.
9 Elevating alongside South Comb Two Mary Cboy watched the great mirrored arms rotate to focus the low sixteen sun on Pasadena. She took an external expressway, spending one of her municipal emergency transit credits to get a car to herself. Exploring the Colonel Sir John Yardley connection would be perilous. She knew enough of federal politics to see the Janus face the United States turned toward Yardley. Embraced by Raphkind, openly shunned now but in the closet perhaps still silky. Yardley might be federally useful and ultimately LAPD answered to the federals. The department was more than half funded by the National Public Defense. To go any further without departmental approval would not be politic. Mary wanted that approval before the day was over. Los Angeles Public Defense Command occupied a three tier block on the favored west side of South Comb Two. The long beanpole of the expressway, in proportion very like a taut stretched human hair, with no visible means of support but its own ten meter hexagonal cross section, carried three express elevators. These stopped at levels chosen only by their passengers, unlike most of the internal arteries of elevators and transports within the comb. She took her seat in the carefully cushioned chair and endured the rapid acceleration. In the moments before the door opened as the elevator slowed she felt as if she were floating. This was only slightly less unpleasant than the weight. The west side looked out across the old communities of Inglewood Culver City and Santa Monica, now covered with great reddish brown slashes as the old city was leveled and new combs encroached upon shadow. In the maxdense hills of Santa Monica layer upon layer of what some netwit thirty years before had called insulas grew like cave wall crystals, dazzling white at noon but now blue gray in the onset of evening. Here and in the stabilized deep sunk pads of Malibu was where the notyetchosen waited for vacancies within the combs. Vacancies were becoming more and more rare as rejuvenators plied their controversial trade, turning good citizens into multicentenarian dci. Mary Choy was too young to attract a rejuvenators pitch but she had gone on eloi busts and seen the interiors of many platinum comb domiciles. She withdrew from the elevator and walked purposefully into the lobby. From the acrophobic view of the city to this large inner directed self contained cavern, horizontal slit windows at hip-level affording little relief, was always a small shock to her. Mary felt it as an abrupt discontinuity like a change of key or even scale in music. Arbeiters moved purposefully on narrow paths near the walls leaving the center open for foot traffic. A central circular desk occupied by two young men in green office uniforms jutted from the floor. Overhead an apse sparkled with sheets and curling ribbons of peaceful light in the cathedral quiet. Pd investigator M Choy, said the young man on her side of the desk as she approached. You have a quarter till appointment with federal coordinator R Ellenshaw. She had made her appointment with pd supervisor D Reeve. News was speeding and she had guessed right. Large green eyes steady on the greeters face, she said, Fine. Do I wait? Not here, please, the greeter said. His eyes pinpointed her with faint disapproval and obvious longing. Youll have a seat in third tier, lobby two. She narrowed her eyes and fixed on the greeter until he averted. Then she shivered slightly nodded and walked away adding an extra lilt to her stride. Disliking that common mix of critique and lust she wished to faintly strut the transform and increase the tension. It was a neutral flaw, not socially damaging but perhaps provocative. A distant revenge on Thea. The greeter would not disapprove of Theo but might not lust for her either. Why Took an escalator to third tier lobby two. Sat with the coffee drinkers and their timeismoney expressions. Examined them casually sherlocking as hobby, and fell into her perpetual muse about how unfortunate sherlocking was a blind jape. Cannot riddle from ambiguous evidence; no detective can avoid the blunder of two or three way outcomes of deduction. Deduction and detection could not be cars on a slaveway; they must freely turn. Still, sherlocking was an amusement and sometimes its results were intriguing. Here for example: a young man on the clear turbo to a needles point federal/state job, dressed as second generation therapied (or natural) might dress in the younger crowds, face bland but not without character. Mary Choy guessed him a conscientious but not inspired bed partner; he had three fingernails on his right hand red and gold lacquered with marriage inquiries from large families: Only in the high federal ranks did such manners dance the norm, families clans gens statting their position in the nomenklatura made largely ceremonial by President Davis before Raphkind. Such positions did not breed high physical passions; they did breed manners, and among the therapied manners rarely hid aberrations. Nice young man in a pleasant deadend existence prime candidate for eloi upon middle age. A pretty parasite. Coming in to the waiting area, somebody more vital: a female transform wearing styles to hide her orbital adaptations, an exotic in the combs. All eyes drawn. The exotic saw Mary Choy and acknowledged kinship with a smile. Came to sit. May 1? Mary indined. The orbital transform bent with strained grace; her muscles now tuned to the bonds of Earth. She obviously shuttled often and was proud possessor of two zone body chemistry; such a transform was too expensive for private payment and must have been federal or firm/house funded. The nice young man decided this orbital transform was too much even for fantasy and ignored her. Others less meshed in the hierarchy admired her openly. Mary was pleased when she sat beside her. Pardon my awkwardness, the orbital said. Im still adjusting. Bichemical. "So I specked. "Ive only been landed eight hours. Youre pd. arent you? Mary inclined again. No sherlocking necessary; the urn-forms were commonly known and varied little from city to city. "And you, she said, are from the Greenbelt? The orbital transform smiled. How keen, she said. Who did you? "Dr. Sumpler. "His group did me too. I must visit him while down. Are you pleased? She considered describing the melanin depletion but since the news would have little practical value to a bichemical, simply gave the polite Yes. Very. The orbital transform saw signs of Marys impending departure for appointmenther glance at the glowing flasher on the wall, her own symbol coming soonand offered her a card. Im down for a week. Much work. Id enjoy company. We can reminisce through old style catalogs. Mary laughed, took the card, offered her own. That would be fun. Everythings on the card. The name on the card: Sandra Auchouch. Pronounced Awshuck. Of course. Pleasure to meet you. The orbital transform inclined and they touched fingertips. No carnal thoughts here; the transform by dress and manner was straight as no orbit could be; Mary rarely crossed. But among professionals in going jobs friendship might be a chance thing and chances had to he advantaged. R Ellensbaw prospered at his high desk; no sherlocking to see this. The metro federal interface supervisor had the look of the oft therapied a man with guts stamina and manifold problems that he had spent years and hundreds of thousands of dollars to smooth. Mary would not have entered his office with a different attitude had he been whiz natural; he was higherup and she came to him with a problem she would not have wanted had the roles been reversed. Mary Choy respected leadership and valued overhead flak armor. M Choy. Welcome to Valhalla. Ellenshaw stood before his desk memo and slate in hand, not happy. Youve tumbled into a shink wasps nest. Yes, sir. Please sit. He looked her over sharply without a flicker of judgment or even male interest. Marys respect for him went up a notch. professional ice was tough to grow and maintain minus berging out and Ellenshaw did not look a berg; too therapied and self knowing for that. I have some questions and then your instructions. She sat, crossing long legs, black workpants hissing faintly. You are convinced personally that this Emanuel Goldsmith is the murderer? Yes, sir. Weve checked out this letter. It is indeed from Colonel Sir John Yardley. The ice was transparent enough for Mary to see Ellensbaws political stripe; like most west coast pd he had detested Raphkind and the tumescence of the Dirty East. Old politics old dirt. Do you have any idea where Emanuel Goldsmith is now? No, sir. Hes gone underground? I dont know, sir. Hispaniola? Its possible. But would Yardley have taken him in? Mary didnt hazard. You know this will become a federal football. The possibility that Goldsmith has gone to Hispaniola makes the halls echo, M Choy. Yes, sir. Theres no chance the federals can bury this. Too many gold and platinum names, too much high blood. So theyve handed the football to us. Jurisdiction primary. To keep your grip on the football, you have to be fresh snow, M Cboy. Are you? Yes, sir. Ive checked your record and I agree. I envy naturals, M Choy. I envy your record. Thank you, sir. Ive had to spend a fortune on therapy to untangle and smooth out. Its been worth it, but.. . So. That had been a calculated ice thinning and it bad worked; he had revealed enough about himself to make Mary feel she was in his confidence, that he had confidence in her. I believe you call it flak armor now, M Choy. Protection from this level so you can concentrate on your work. The armor is thin this case. You are not completely on your own and you are working a spike fence. We likely cannot catch you if you fall. Not in time. Clear? Yes, sir. The word here is, west coast federals hate the Yardley connection as much as I do. Its old, its Raphkind, it smells. East coast federal is still ambiguous and likely will be for years while the grand juries and courts grind slow. But maybe not. Yardley keeps pushing his imports.. . We keep blocking them. Spike fence. I give you permission to sniff all local trails and if theyre still cold after two days, you have clearance for an official visit to Hispaniola. Assistants if you need them, as many as five. Ill need two Hispaniolan experts, Mary said. My office will find them and pass their names and currvitas on to Supervising Inspector D Reeve, unless you have people in mind already.. She did not. Do I have your permission to query Citizen Oversight? Ellenshaw averted for a moment, frowning. We can only make so many Oversight queries. But if any case merits, this one does. You have permission to go to Oversight. Thank you. She inclined. Details are on your orders. Well work with federal to get Hispaniola to cooperate with you. Call me anytime. Dont be isolated. You might be our flak armor on this one. He smiled cleanly. Yes, sir. She left Ellenshaws office knowing this was the case of her career and pd was giving her extraordinary support; also knowing federal bad deemed her expendable, but not in a minor cause. She would be stupid not to be afraid. To those concerned with basic human dignity Colonel Sir John Yardley was the western worlds prosperous heart of darkness. Mary Choy allowed herself the requisite fear, but no more. The comb towers went dark against the last blue wink of dusk. She drove a slaveway to the pd shade central on Sepulveda and filled out a request for overnight research space, slept an hour in a cop cot, drank a nutrient cocktail and went to work.