Pure Joy (15 page)

You have to be careful with tiny stomachs too. My griffs have delicate stomachs (some breeds just do, while others are hardier) and always get sick when people feed them from the table. And the vet warned me that in Minnie’s case, at two pounds, feeding her human food casually could really make her seriously sick or even kill her. He said that cheese, cold cuts/meats, or sweets like cookies or cakes could make her very, very ill. And, of course, chocolate, whether milk chocolate
or dark, but especially dark, can kill a dog. They can’t process it, need their stomachs pumped, and have to be given charcoal immediately. But chocolate can literally be a killer. Fortunately, that’s not true for people since I’m a devoted chocoholic. But even what seem like harmless treats from the table can be nearly or actually lethal to a dog the size of Minnie. So well-meaning friends who want to give her a treat from the table are sternly warned off. And I recently learned that grapes can be fatal to a dog too.

Because Europeans are so loving with their dogs, they are much more casual about what they feed them, and they love giving them samples of what they eat themselves, anything from prosciutto to cooked meat and vegetables to bits of fruit. But in Minnie’s case, it would make her very sick. I always watch my friends there like hawks so they don’t give her something they consider a treat but would make her sick. They think it’s neurotic of me, but I trust the vet on that one, and he is emphatic about it.

I guess dogs really do resemble their masters. I’ve never had a great stomach either. Stress of any kind always hits my stomach first. And travel sometimes does it to me too. The last time we flew to New York, the vet thought Minnie’s upset stomach was due to the stress of the trip. Twelve hours in that bag on an airplane can’t be easy. And for many years now I
drink tap water only in San Francisco. Everywhere else I drink bottled water, because constantly changing water from the tap, in different cities around the world, wrecks my stomach. I give Minnie bottled water now too. It sounds extravagant, but she drinks very little, and why stress her stomach when we change cities so often? It’s just simpler to make life easy for her, which in the end is easier for me too.

We learned an important lesson with Victoria’s Chihuahua. She used to feed her cold cuts, because she was a picky eater too. And her Chihuahua got a hole in her stomach and was very sick for several months, frighteningly so, so now we are all very rigid about what we give them to eat and drink. Sorry, Minnie, no prosciutto or salami, no chocolate cake or cookies. What can I say? It’s a dog’s life.

Pure Joy
Stephanie Unger

As I said earlier, I find that the answer to many things at this point in my life is “Why not?” I have spent a lifetime worrying about how what I do will impact other people. I have been a mother since I was nineteen, earlier than most. And I was a wife for thirty-six years, starting at seventeen. For all of that time, and even now, with adult kids, I’ve had to think about how what I did affected someone else. Was it good for them? Their needs had to come first, and I wanted it that way, and still do. I don’t want the choices I make to adversely affect them or the common good. The family comes first, as I believe it should. Sometimes that means sacrifice, or giving up something you really want to do. But at this point in my life, I realize that some of it really doesn’t matter. I no
longer have to worry about embarrassing a child when I pick them up at school in Wellington boots, even if it’s pouring rain. “Omigod, Mom, you can’t wear those!” Yes, I can. I’m not going to wear stilettos in the rain, or get wet feet. “You’re not going out in
that
?” is a mantra you hear often, if you have girls. And the answer now is “Yes, I am,” if it makes me happy. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt them or embarrass them publicly, but it’s not going to kill anyone if I wear sandals they hate or a hairdo they don’t like. And I don’t have a husband who has to agree on whether or not I get a dog. And after so many years of pleasing and taking care of so many people, it’s something of a shock to realize I can do whatever I like about some things, and certainly minor ones.

We all get into habits and travel familiar paths. There is something comforting about that. But it’s also exciting to do new things, meet new people, see something I’ve always wanted to see, develop new passions, explore talents I didn’t know I had. I’ve embarked on two additional careers in recent years, opening a gallery of contemporary art to show the work of emerging artists, and writing song lyrics, and it’s truly exciting to learn and try something different. It’s fascinating to open new doors, even if challenging at times. It makes the possibilities life offers suddenly limitless if I am willing to say “Why not?”, and it begins to touch on every
area of my life. The “I shoulds” begin to melt away, and the “I can’t’s” become fewer. I can’t go to China because … I shouldn’t have a dog, because … Suddenly I find it infinitely more exciting to say “Why not?” Why not go to that party or dinner, meet those people, take a trip, learn a language, start a painting even if I never painted before? And it brings new life to my work to stretch the boundaries and expand my horizons. It may startle those around me at first, and even threaten those who have known me for many years, particularly the people who are afraid to say “Why not?” themselves. Courage and newness can be frightening to other people. It alarms them when anyone breaks loose from the pack.

And allowing myself to love a dog, or even two or three dogs, may be part of that. I never thought I’d be a woman with a Chihuahua or be gaga over a dog. I have the time and the love to give, I can afford to feed her, and my children are all in good shape. I’m not hurting anyone by having a tiny little dog, or by buying her a rhinestone collar or a silly pink sweater with a teddy bear on it. She gives me endless joy, and she takes nothing away from anyone else. And life is about joy—it’s about what makes us smile and feel good, and puts a spring in our step. If that tiny white face with the Yoda ears makes me laugh when I look at her, my life is happier, and my world a better place. Hard things happen to all of us, and have
to me as well. We’ve all had our tough moments, our disappointments and heartbreaks, we’ve paid our dues. We’ve earned the right to be happy. We don’t have to apologize for it. It’s okay to feel good, or to laugh at a little dog or a big dog, or to fall in love with a funny, furry face. And that happiness seeps out of us like great smells from a bakery and touches those around us and makes them feel good too. Don’t let anyone deprive you of that. You have a right to feel great, and to as much joy as you can get. And when Charles Schulz said “Happiness is a warm puppy,” he knew what he was talking about. For me, for now, that’s Minnie. Happiness is Minnie, hiding her kibble, and sliding across my kitchen floor in Paris to hide a toy before I can get it, and then looking back at me with that knowing look. She knows just how cute she is, and how much I love her. For me, happiness is a little white two-pound dog. Allow yourself the luxury of letting happiness be whatever it is to you. And for some of us, a puppy or a dog we love is pure joy. May that special joy find its way into your heart and keep you warm.

Miss Minnie in her favorite office chair in San Francisco, across from my desk
Alessandro Calderano

DANIELLE STEEL has been hailed as one of the world’s most popular authors, with over 600 million copies of her novels sold. Her many international bestsellers include
Winners
,
First Sight
,
Until the End of Time
,
The Sins of the Mother
,
Friends Forever
,
Betrayal
,
Hotel Vendôme
,
Happy Birthday
,
44 Charles Street
, and other highly acclaimed novels. She is also the author of
His Bright Light
, the story of her son Nick Traina’s life and death, and
A Gift of Hope
, a memoir of her work with the homeless. And she writes children’s books, song lyrics, and poetry.