Pulling Home (28 page)

can’t leave me.” She burrowed further into his chest. “Please, don’t leave me.”

Several moments passed before Jack disengaged her hands and with great

gentleness, lifted her head from his chest and stepped back—away from her—away from them. “I’ll stay at the hospital tonight while you gather your things. It will be easier that way.”

***

...easier that way ...so sorry…
Leslie didn’t know when the words stopped and Jack left. She’d shut down somewhere between his first apology and her fifth plea for him to stay. Losing Jack was as sudden and painful as losing Christian. She sank onto the king size bed she and Jack had once shared. It was all gone—the dreams, the plans, the hopes.

She bent her head and let the tears fall. Why couldn’t she ever be good enough?

Why did Audra Valentine always have to be better? Leslie had bartered self respect and a vow to be anything and anybody he wanted, and still, he’d refused. No one wanted her.

No one at all.

She crawled to the edge of the bed and opened the nightstand drawer. She spotted the bottle of sleeping pills and snatched it up. Pharmaceuticals were such wonderful little helpers. She popped three in her mouth and reached for the glass of wine she’d poured earlier. Wine and pills were a lovely combination. She swallowed two more pills, sipped more wine. Chardonnay complemented the pills quite nicely. Leslie finished off the glass and poured another. Then she dumped the rest of the pills on the bed and placed them one by one in her mouth.

Chapter 31

“He has a right to know.”—Peter Andellieu

Peter Andellieu delivered Christian’s briefcase to Jack with an insistence that he review the contents before he spoke to Audra again.
There are important documents
inside
, he’d said.
Life altering
. Nothing in the stack of bank statements or insurance papers appeared life altering but Jack would plow on, because the sooner he got through it, the sooner he could see Audra and tell her the truth he’d been hiding from for too many years.

He rubbed his eyes as exhaustion blurred the papers on his desk. He couldn’t stop thinking about the call he received from Grant ninety minutes after he left Leslie.

Pumping herself with sleeping pills? For someone who loved life and loved saving lives, how could she try to take her own? Or had the whole thing been a ploy to get him to change his mind about their break up? Why would a person bent on doing herself in, call her brother and tell him what she’d ingested, how many, and when? The answer was simple, even to Grant. She wouldn’t. Once she stabilized, Grant planned to transfer her to Syracuse State Mental institution where she’d undergo a complete psychiatric evaluation and most likely, extensive therapy.

As for August Richot, Audra could destroy the pillar of Holly Springs with one

statement. Would she show the same lack of mercy August had when he’d shunned

Corrine Valentine’s pregnancy? Jack wouldn’t blame her if she did. Bringing forth such knowledge would gain her respect in a community that had condemned her most of her life.

He rummaged through several more papers, wondering if Dr. Perfection’s

surgeries on Hollywood’s darlings had affected his ability to judge a truly life altering situation. It took a bourbon and forty more minutes to discover the letter, neatly tucked in the side pocket of the briefcase.

My days and nights are long and lonely without you. I dream of holding you in
my arms, waking to the warmth of your touch, the headiness of your scent, the pleasure
of your smile—filling me, completing me.

Do you know how much joy you’ve brought me? How much pleasure? Yes, you

must know the latter, my love. Our feelings transcend the physical. They belong to the
spiritual— that level which can only be imagined by some, achieved by few.

I detest that we must pretend we are nothing more than friends. I wish we could
shout our love to the world, but I know it would hurt too many people and so, I remain
silent but my heart beats for you alone.

Always,

Peter

Jack re-read the letter five times, his heart shriveling more with each word until nothing remained but a dried-out shell. His brain refused to register what the words so clearly indicated but by the fourth time, tiny synapses sparked and burst out the truth.

Audra and Peter Andellieu were lovers.
She’d betrayed Christian. Duped Jack once again. Slowly, he picked up his cell and dialed her number. When she answered, he said,

“I know the truth about you and Andellieu. Bring him to my house. You’ve got twenty minutes.”

The pair arrived in the allotted time, another testament to their closeness.

Andellieu appeared uneasy and tense, if not a little white around his tanned edges, but it only added to his good looks. Jack barely glanced at Audra. What would be the point? To look into those eyes and once again, be misled? To see love and affection where it so obviously was not? When would he learn?

“Audra said you wanted to see us?”

It surprised him when Andellieu spoke. Apparently the man didn’t trust his lover to formulate her own thoughts or maybe there were less lies if one person did the talking.

Jack sat across from them, with Audra and Andellieu on the couch—how interesting—

and Jack in the leather recliner. “I was going through Christian’s briefcase tonight and found this.” He held up the folded letter. “After hours of reading Christian’s financials, this was actually the only piece that interested me.” He pulled a smile across his face.

“My brother treated you as a friend, and this is how you repay that friendship?”

Dr. Perfection with his manners and poise stared straight at him and said,

“Actually, I had hoped you would find it.”

Andellieu
wanted
him to know about his affair with Audra? Why? So he could lay claim before Jack started to think he and Audra had a chance together? Had she said something? Started to have doubts about Dr. Perfection? “So this letter is what, some kind of message to tell me you’d been screwing her when my brother was alive and planned to continue now that he’s dead? How noble of you.”

The right side of Andellieu’s jaw twitched. Twice. Good, he’d pissed him off.

Audra kept her eyes on the letter in Jack’s hand. He tossed it at her. “Here. Maybe you want to refresh your memory. Christian wasn’t stupid. Did he find the letter and confront you or did he remain quiet, hoping like a fool you’d end the affair? He was better than all of us and this is how you treated him?” Rage burned through him. “You both deserve to rot in hell.”

“Perhaps I do, but certainly not Audra.” Peter Andellieu covered her hand with

long, piano-playing fingers.

“Peter—”

“Hush. I’m the one who put the letter there. I wanted you to find it.”

“So I’d stop following Audra around like a sick puppy? Don’t worry, my eyes are

wide open. I wouldn’t have her if she stripped naked and gyrated on my lap.”

Dr. Perfection’s voice held an edge of anger as he said, “You don’t know what

you’re talking about.”

“Really?” Jack wanted to punch the guy and break his pretty nose, or at least

smash a few teeth but it would only give the plastic surgeon guru another opportunity to play with his face. Jack unclenched his fists and settled in the recliner. “Enlighten me.”

“No.” Audra stood and snatched the letter from the coffee table, shifting her gaze everywhere but on Jack. “There’s no sense pretending anymore. Everything you said is right. So, now you know. Peter, I want to leave.”

“Audra.” Andellieu stroked her bare arm.

Christ, the way he touched her made Jack want to break the guy’s fingers. And

hand. And jaw.

“He has a right to know.”

“Damn right I do. If you’re going to play house with
my
daughter around, I have a right to know.” He enjoyed watching the color drain from her face when he referred to Kara. “I’m sure he knows about our past relationship and that I’m Kara’s real father. You do know that, don’t you? I mean if you’re sharing a bed, you’re sharing other secrets, too.” Andellieu’s perfect lips flattened. Ah, he didn’t like that. Well, too damn bad.

“In some ways I see your brother in you. In others, you’re polar opposites.

Christian would have harmed himself before humiliating another person.”

“Don’t talk about my brother as though you really knew him.”

“I did,” Andellieu said quietly.

“Right, as your lover’s husband and the family uncle. How convenient.”

“Peter, I want to leave.” Audra started walking toward the door. “Please. Now.”

Andellieu didn’t jump up but laid his hands on his knees and met Jack’s gaze. “I didn’t write that letter to Audra.”

“I’m not stupid.”

“Peter, please.”

“I wrote it to Christian.”

“You wrote it to Christian? That’s crazy. Why would you do…” Jack’s brain shut

down before it formulated the final thought.

Andellieu’s voice dipped with raw pain. “We loved each other. We’d been

together five years.”

“But…” Jack’s brain refused to process the words.

“Audra knew. She’s always known. Whose idea do you think it was to move to

California?”

“Are you saying it was Christian’s?” He pinned his gaze on Audra, who stood on

the fringe of the room, tears streaming down her face.

“It was easier for Christian to be who he was without fear of disappointing his

family. He gave Audra a respectable way out and she gave him the perfect cover. And then there was Kara.” He paused and smiled across the room at Audra. “We all love her.

Christian loved Audra too, just not in a romantic way.”

“Are you saying they were never man and wife in the traditional sense?” It was

too much to comprehend.

“If you mean did they have carnal knowledge of one another, no. They had

separate bedrooms as well. I know it sounds absurd, but it worked for us. We were all very happy.”

“Maybe you were, but what about Audra? What about her needs?” He shot a

glance at her. “Or while you and my brother were together did she go on the prowl for her own diversions?” The thought sickened him.

“That doesn’t deserve an answer. You’re the only man she’s ever been with and if you can’t figure out why, then you don’t deserve her.” He stood and made his way to Audra who slung her arm around his waist and moved with him toward the door.

And just like that Jack’s world shifted once again, landing flat on top of him. He could let her walk out of his life now and eventually the pain would scab over. Or he could stop her and open his heart. There were no guarantees. The front door opened. He shot out of the chair and cleared the room in eight steps. “Stay.” And then, “Please?”

She swiped at her eyes, smearing mascara along her right cheek. Her eyes and

nose were puffed with various shades of red but she’d never looked more beautiful. All these years, she’d let others blame her for stealing Christian and tearing him from his family. They’d called her names and compared her to the no-good mother who slept with half the town. None of it had been true. If he had a lifetime, it wouldn’t be long enough to love her. “Audra?”
Please tell me I haven’t gone too far. Please give me one more
chance.

She reached up and trailed her fingers along his jaw. “I’ll stay,” she whispered.

Jack heard Peter’s footsteps on the stairs but he couldn’t take his eyes off Audra.

“I’m so sorry,” he murmured, clasping her hands. “So very sorry.” He pulled her into the foyer and closed the front door.

“I had to protect Christian. He was such a good person and I didn’t want people

judging him.”

“So you let them judge you instead?”

She shrugged. “I could take it. He couldn’t.”

Jack kissed her mouth softly, slowly, his tongue tracing her lips. “I’ve never

stopped loving you.”

“I ran two thousand miles to get away from you, but I couldn’t. You’ve been

buried in my heart all this time.”

“Then you love me, too. Right?” The vulnerability was killing him.

She clutched his shoulders with both hands and reached up on tiptoe to return his kiss. “Of course I love you. No matter how hard I’ve tried not to, I’ve always failed.”

“Good, then we’re in this for keeps.”

“Forever.”

“And even after that.” He grabbed her hand and led her to the bedroom. When

they reached the bed, he sat on the end and pulled her to him. “I’m going to ask you a question I should have asked nine years ago.”

She began unbuttoning his shirt. “What might that be?”

“Audra Valentine, will you marry me?”

Her eyes shimmered with fresh tears. She kissed his forehead, his cheek, his

mouth. “It’s about time,” she murmured. “Yes, Jack Wheyton, love of my life, I’ll marry you.”

“How soon is too soon?” God, she knew how to drive him crazy with those hands,

sliding down his chest toward his belt buckle. “Next week?”

She eased the buckle open and moved to the button of his jeans. “We’ll figure it out.” She slid the zipper down. “Right now, we’ve got nine years to make up.”

He jerked against her hand as she slipped her fingers inside his boxers. “Ahhh, I like the sound of that.” She inched his jeans and boxers down and rimmed her tongue between his leg and thigh. “I’m the only man you’ve ever been with?” he croaked.

“Hmmm.”

“If you were any better at this, I’d be a dead man.”

Her laughter rained over him, exciting him even more. Leslie knew technique and

staying power but Audra operated on passion and intuition, an intoxicating aphrodisiac.

“I want you,” he groaned as she planted tiny kisses along his belly. With each movement, her silken hair tormented his cock until he knew he’d burst if he didn’t stop her now. Jack grabbed her shoulders and breathed, “I need to be inside you.”

She lifted her head and flung back her hair, a slow smile creeping over her face.