"Yeah, but it'll come back again, in winter. The great desolation. Empty streets, empty buildings. Like we suffered through a plague year or something. Blah. Enough to turn most guys to religion or legitimacy."
"Most guys?" I asked, trying to keep my voice innocent.
"Like you, Felix?"
"That's why I said most guys. Keep quiet or you'll miss our turn."
Which was doubtful, since the Lafayette House was now before us, in its white Victorian splendor, but I guess Felix was tired of showing his metrosexual side, and that was fine with me. I turned left and was able to find a space, which pleased me. We got out and I left the doors unlocked --- if we had to leave quickly, fumbling to unlock said doors could cause problems --- and then Felix asked for a moment to go through his bag.
"Of course," I said, as he rummaged through his leather carrying case, and then he said, "Ah," and placed something in his coat pocket. I caught up with him as we went toward the entrance, and said, "As a matter of record, sir, are you carrying?"
"Yep."
"And what kind of weapon do you have?"
"This," he said, and he showed me what he had just placed in his coat. I looked at him and looked at the object, which quickly went back into his coat.
"Tape?" I asked. "Duct tape?"
"Absolutely."
"And why duct tape?"
Felix said, "Ever tell you the tale of my uncle Julius?"
"Nope, but I have a feeling you're going to."
'That's right. Uncle Julius was a disappointment to some family members, since he ran a small, legitimate hardware store in the North End, down in Boston. A little of this, a little of that. Everything from pipes to tools to small appliances. Was proud of showing people how to make small repairs around their homes and apartments. He told me once that most people could get away with two things in their home repair kit"
"And what's that?"
"WD-40 lubricant to make things go, and duct tape to make things stop."
I had to laugh. "Good for Uncle Julius. And you have the tape because ... "
"Because someone's being a pain in the ass to you, I'm going to make it stop. That all right?"
"That's perfect."
"Good."
We went into the lobby of the Lafayette House and I saw that the gift shop, the site of my earlier triumph that day, was now closed. There were just a few people in the lobby but the lounge looked pretty well attended, with someone playing the piano, and a few drunken souls were trying to sing along in such a manner that I couldn't even identify the tune. I found a house phone and after a moment or two with the hotel operator, got the room of Chuck Bittner.
"Yeah?" came the foggy reply.
"Chuck, it's Lewis Cole."
"Lewis Cole ... Jesus, man, do you know what time it is?"
"No, I don't, and that's not the reason I called you. I'm ... I'm ready to make an announcement. I just need to run something by you."
Now he didn't seem so asleep. "Good. Where are you?"
"In the lobby."
"Room 312," he said, and that was that.
I hung up the room phone and Felix fell in step with me as we headed to the bank of elevators. As we waited for an elevator, Felix said, "All right with you, I'll take the lead here. Okay?"
"Sounds fine."
"Way I see it, you want a promise from him to leave you alone, not to bring you into the campaign. Correct?"
"One hundred percent. But Felix ... "
The indicator light dinged and the door slid open. We went in and he said, "Yes?"
"He's going to be a tough one," I said. "Ex-navy. Full-time campaign worker for General Grayson. True believer in the general's cause. He might not roll over for you like other guys you've ... encountered."
Felix gently pushed the button for the third floor. "Don't fret, son. Don't fret. You forget how I do love a challenge."
"So you do consider this a challenge?"
Felix had a faint smile on his face and then the door opened up, and he said, "Hush. Just let your uncle Felix make it all right."
We went down the soft-lit hallway, found Room 312 with no difficulty, and Felix said quietly, "Okay, you stand in front of the door, so he can see you through the peephole. Make sure you're standing there, nice and still, and when the door opens up, you take two steps to the right, wait, and then follow me in. Once you're in --- and this is important --- don't touch a damn thing. Got it?"
"Yeah. Stand in front of the door. Nice and still. Two steps to the left and ---"
"To the right, moron, to the right, didn't you hear what I just said?"
I gave him a smirk to let him know he wasn't the only one playing games here tonight, and he shook his head and I stood before the door to Room 312 and gave it a sharp knock. From inside I could make out the low murmur of a television set and then the sound of someone approaching the door. I stood still and quiet, but out of the corner of my eye, I made out Felix to my left, standing flat against the wall, and now he was wearing thin black leather gloves. Damn Felix. I hadn't even seen him do that.
The sound of the door unlocking almost startled me, and then I took two steps to the right and ---
Felix moved whip-snap fast, going right into the room, one hand on the shoulder of a very surprised Chuck Bittner, wearing a white terry-cloth robe and ---
A heavy, meaty sound as Felix punched him square in the nose, and ---
I followed in, the door shutting behind me. Chuck was on the ground, and Felix quickly tore off a strip of duct tape, slapped it over Chuck's mouth, and Chuck scrambled to move away from the pain and the attention, and Felix got up and rolled Chuck over on his side. Chuck then tried to take advantage of that, by clambering up on his hands and knees, but like some damn wrestling move from TV, Felix slammed into him with his whole body weight, falling onto the man's back with his knees, and that must have hurt like hell.
Chuck collapsed with an "oomph" and a groan, and in the fast mess that followed, Felix worked quickly again, binding Chuck's wrists together with duct tape. Felix got up, breathing just a bit hard, and then he grabbed Chuck by his upper arms and maneuvered him onto an unmade bed. Chuck hit the bed on his side, another moan following, and he looked at me and I looked at him. Blood was streaming from his nose, trickling down the shiny gray duct tape. Felix looked to me and said, "Glass of water, if I may? And don't forgot what I said about touching things."
I went into the open bathroom, got a small drinking glass, holding it with a white washcloth, and filled it with water using another washcloth on the tap. I came back out into the room and the television was just a bit louder. Felix took the glass and drank it all, and then put the glass in his pocket-no use leaving DNA evidence behind-and came back over to the bed. Chuck looked at me and looked at Felix, and started making grunting noises from behind the tape.
Chapter Fourteen
Felix shook his head, took a chair and sat across from Chuck.
Felix said, "Before we begin, my apologies. I have the utmost respect for men and women in and out of uniform who've volunteered to serve. I might have been in the service as well, except for a juvenile record that made even the most aggressive recruiter turn gray with dismay. So. Having said that, my apologies for breaking into your room, sir, and causing you pain and discomfort."
I stood there, waiting, and Felix leaned over and said, "But apologies aside, sir, I have loyalty to that gentleman standing by the wall, a loyalty I take quite seriously, and before the two of us leave here tonight, we're going to reach an understanding. If I make myself clear, just nod your head."
There was no nod, just a vigorous shaking of the head, and violent grunting noises that, if they had been decipherable, were no doubt laced with a host of obscenities. If this bothered Felix, he didn't show it. He didn't have to. There were other ways.
Another strip of tape appeared in his hands, and this time, it was shoved against his bleeding nose. There was a muffled howl as Felix worked the tape, blocking both nostrils, and Chuck's chest started heaving. Felix leaned in again and said, "Nothing works one hundred percent, so I'm sure you're getting some oxygen into your system ... but is it enough? We'll see .... In the meantime, stop flailing around and give me a nod that you understand what I'm saying, and the tape comes off your nose."
Chuck's fleshy face started changing colors, and then, movement stopped and I thought he had passed out, but no, he nodded. Briefly and quickly, but he nodded. And true to his word, Felix removed the tape from his nose, and there was a hoarse, rasping sound as Chuck started panting through his nose.
Felix, his voice now soothing, said, "Ah, now, that wasn't hard, was it? Just a little nod and you started breathing again. A wonderful thing. We're very proud of you, sir."
The breathing became more normal, but there was anger behind those eyes, a deep and abiding anger that made me want to look away, but Felix would not move, would not flinch, and he stayed right there, right in the man's face.
Felix said "I don't think I need to tell you, but I'm going to remind you of what's next. I can take the tape off your mouth and you can start in on how my friend and I broke in here, assaulted you, and how you're going to have us arrested and ruin us and sue us and take all our money and our homes. It's what I'd expect from a man in your position. I've heard it before. And you know what? It doesn't mean a damn thing. So let's not waste each other's time with such nonsense. We came in here for a specific reason, one specific goal, and once that goal's been achieved, we'll all move on. Do you understand what I'm saying? If so, do favor me a with another nod."
I waited, wondering how far Chuck would go in fighting Felix, but there was just the faintest of head movements. Felix took it and there was such pleasure in his voice, I almost expected him to start clapping.
"Very good again, sir," Felix said. "So. Let us begin. Here's the agreement we're going to reach. You and the Grayson campaign are going to leave Lewis Cole alone. You're not to contact him or bother him in anyway. You're not going to even mention his name in your staff meetings. You're not to leak information about him to any friendly press or Internet blogger. In other words, you are going to forget his name, his appearance, his life, his background, his very existence. Now. Have you understood everything I've said? Have you? How about a little nod for the home team?"
The eyes were still burning with hate and anger, but there was that faint nod. "Good. Now, having gotten that out of the way, I'm sure you're wondering, what's in it for you? What possible benefit do you gain from having agreed to all that?"
Felix carefully crossed his legs, clasped his hands over his knees. "A smart and legitimate question. And here's the answer. We depart. At once. Never to bother you again, never to cross paths again, never even to breathe the same air in the same room. We depart, you depart, and after the primary next Tuesday, you and the general move on to South Carolina and all is right with the world. Do we have an agreement?"
The air seemed heavy in the room as we waited. I suppose I should have felt guilty or embarrassed or upset at what Felix was doing to this man, but I remembered Bittner's touch upon my arm, and the words he spoke about my service in the Department of Defense. I had lost dear ones many years ago that were close enough to be family, especially one woman (ah, Cissy, came the quick and sharp memory), and having this man before me try to use that service and those memories for political purposes ... it was like someone urinating on the altar at Notre Dame at the height of a sacred Mass.
Not to mention the threats that would have impacted both Barbara and Annie.
So I felt fine. But still, I waited.
Chuck looked at me and then looked at Felix, and there was the nod.
Felix unfolded his legs. "Ah, good. Now that we have this agreement, I guess I can take the tape off and we'll be on our way. ... "
Was that it? I wondered. Was that going to be it? But I guess I knew Felix better than I thought, for when he leaned forward to remove the tape, he suddenly stopped and sat back down in the chair.
Another few moments of waiting, and Felix quickly shook his head. "No. It's not going to work. I mean ... we're all men here, men of the world, worldly men ... how can any agreement we reach last when you're under such duress? What would stop you from calling the police after we leave? I mean, Lewis here would probably skate, being such good friends with the local gendarmes, but not me. As you could probably deduce, I've had my share of police attention over the years. No, I'm afraid this isn't going to work. I'm going to have to come up with something else. Lewis?"
"Yes?"
"Any ideas?"
"Fresh out," I said. "But give me a few minutes or thereabouts. I'm sure I'll come up with something."
Felix turned back to the former navy man and said, "So, that's the quandary we're in. You see, if you were anybody else, I wouldn't have any problem. Pain and the threat of pain are wonderful motivating factors. A few minutes with an exposed light bulb and some tweezers, you'd be ready to sign over the title property to your home to make me leave. But once we start down that path, well, there're no good choices available to us. You can still go back on your promise to us ... even more, if pain is involved, because no matter what pull Lewis might have with the police, it won't go very far if pain is involved. So it has to be something else. Something else that matters to you, .something that will ensure that whatever promise you made here to leave Lewis alone actually sticks."