Precious Consequences (2 page)

I look away just in time to see Kyle walking back towards me, drink in hand. My eyes travel the length of him. His blue polo shirt fits him well and shows off some of his best assets. Broad shoulders, defined chest, strong arms. The designer jeans he’s wearing hugs his legs and I’m sure if he had to turn around, it would show off another one of his ass-ets. I snicker at my inside joke.

“What’s so funny?” he asks, amused. Realizing he heard me makes me blush, but I manage to keep it cool. “Your ex-girlfriend.” I reply, taking the blue cup from his grasp. I bring it up to my lips, tasting the harsh liquid and feeling it burn all the way down my throat. It’s disgusting. But after the third or fourth cup I won’t taste it anymore.

Kyle frowns. “I didn’t even know Kimber was here,” he lies easily. Of course he knows. Kimber would have made sure of it.

I shrug. Bringing my cup back to my lips, I watch Kyle over the rim as I take another gulp, and another, until it’s finished. Kyle’s eyes never leave mine and when he licks his lips I have to stop myself from mimicking him.

“You want another one?” he asks, taking our empty cups and placing them on a nearby table. Instead of answering, I step closer, liquid courage coursing through my veins, and take his hand.

“Dance with me,” I say softly. His hand tightens around mine and he leads us onto the makeshift dance floor in the middle of the giant living room. Eyes fall on us and I tense. The attention I’m used to getting is usually the kind that takes place behind closed doors, or in the backseat of a car, not in public. I feel Kyle’s chest pressed firmly against my back.

“Relax,” he breathes against my neck. “Let go.”

His hands rest on my hips and the way his fingertips press into my skin makes me shiver. Our bodies start moving, our hips bumping and grinding to the beat of the music. I push my ass into Kyle’s crotch and rub it back and forth over his growing hard on. He sucks in a breath, and I stifle a moan. This is what I want. I crave the physical connection like lungs crave air. One song bleeds into another and we keep dancing until the room gets hot and my skin is damp. Brushing my dark hair to the side, Kyle lowers his head until his lips brush against my ear.

“Let’s go upstairs,” he whispers. My head is swimming, from both, the alcohol I’ve had and my need to get lost in this carnal connection. “I want you, Hayley,” he breathes into my ear. “I’ve wanted you for so long.”

I turn around to face him. His eyes are dark, determined. I’m fairly certain he just said that to get into my pants but I can’t judge him for that. I’m planning on using him for the same thing. “Okay,” I say. I ignore the pang in my chest. I always feel that way
before.

Kyle grabs my hand and starts pulling me through the mass of people, which seems to have doubled since I arrived. The clock on the wall reads 11pm but I doubt the party will abate any time soon. Guys stop to talk to Kyle but he brushes them off, the same way he does to the girls who throw themselves at him. He leads me up the marble staircase and only lets my hand go when we reach his bedroom door. He ushers me into his room, his hand on the small of my back, and closes the door. With every step he takes towards me I feel the sexual tension intensify. For a brief second Kyle hesitates, and I can see the indecision in his eyes and on his face. He seems to recover from whatever conflict he felt a second ago because he closes the gap between us in one stride. The silence between us stretches and I think we both know words are not necessary. Talking would only make it awkward, forcing us to pretend that this is more than a simple exchange. He only asked me to come to this party for one reason, why make
it something it isn’t? 

He swallows, leaning down until his soft lips brush against mine. His tongue leaves a blazing trail on my bottom lip and I open up, welcoming him. Our lips move against each other, our tongues twisting as we taste each other. I taste the beer on his breath but the anticipation of feeling with only my body overshadows it. His hands grab my hips roughly as he pushes me onto his bed. He climbs over me, his lips crashing into mine again. I claw at his clothes, our hands removing every piece of fabric, every barrier, until we’re both naked. Like all the times before this, I push all emotions away, focusing on nothing but the physical.

“Fuck,” Kyle breathes harshly. “I don’t think I have a condom.”

I think about it for a minute. I’ve never had sex without one but I’ve often wondered what it felt like. I’m on the pill, so we should be fine. A voice pops up in my head telling me what a bad idea this is but I reason with it, arguing that, with graduation around the corner, this gets to be one last hooray. After tonight, I will get to start over and pretend that the last year of my life hasn’t been filled with parties and meaningless sex. I never have to see Kyle or anyone else from this wretched, soul sucking place ever again. So why not go out with a
bang.
Literally.

“It’s okay,” I say. “We’re good.”

“But I’ve never gone without one,” he contends.

I look him in the eye. “Neither have I. But I’m on the pill, so we’re good.”

He settles between my legs and I feel the tip of his cock tease my entrance. “Tell me you want this,” Kyle breathes heavily with gritted teeth. “Tell me you want me to do this to you.”

“Yes,” I breathe. I bite my lip and close my eyes when I feel him push in. I wrap my legs around him and he lowers himself onto me. I welcome the weighty feeling, and the fullness. Kyle doesn’t look at me as he thrusts deeper and deeper. He tucks his face into my neck and I find that I don’t mind it. This is all I wanted. It helps me forget about the parents who don’t love me and only use me as a pawn when they see fit. I can’t even say I’m a trophy daughter anymore, because I made sure to ruin that image good and proper. Maybe I am a slut, or a whore, but when it’s nothing but my body connecting with another, everything else fades away. I’ve managed to replace emotional things like affection and love with the feeling of sexual and physical gratification. It’s fucked up. But it works for me.

Kyle quickens his pace, his hot breath fanning the inside of my neck. His muscles tense and I know he’s close. Lifting his weight slightly, I take the chance to slip my hand between our bodies and start rubbing my clit. The quicker Kyle moves his hips, the quicker my hand moves, and it’s not long before we both moan our release. 

“Fuck, Hayley,” Kyle sighs, rolling off me and catching his breath. “I wasn’t expecting it to be so…”

“Good?” I finish for him. “What? You didn’t ask your buddies how it is before you invited me here?” I sit up quickly and grab the nearest item of clothing to cover myself up.

His brows furrow. “No, Hayls. Do you think that’s why I invited you? So that I could just have sex with you?”

“Yes.” I reply honestly. Kyle looks away from me and I know I’ve caught him.

“Look, Hayley, I -” I put my hand up, interrupting him mid-sentence.

“Don’t, Kyle. I know the drill. I used you just as much as you used me and now it’s over.”

I jump off the bed and start gathering my clothes. Kyle doesn’t move from the bed while I dress, but when I look up again he’s standing in front of me, wearing only his jeans.

“Hayley, wait.” he pleads. His expression is one of guilt. But guilt over what exactly? Having sex with me or admitting that it’s all he wanted me for?

I see another emotion flit across his features but it’s gone before I can determine what it is. Our eyes meet for the last time and I do something I’ve never done with anyone else before. I touch his cheek. And then his lips. “Goodbye, Kyle.” I whisper. I’m not sure why I say it, or why I touch his face that way, but for the first time ever I feel something else, something new.

Regret. 

Horns break through the memory and I jump in my seat. The traffic light in front of me is green but I was too distracted to notice. I ease forward into the traffic, ignoring the swear words
being thrown in my direction by other drivers.  I check my rearview mirror again, to make sure Ari is okay, and find her staring out the window, still singing her song. I’m silently grateful that the only reminder I have of her father is her brown eyes and that her dark curls and fair skin come from me. Not that it would’ve mattered. The day she was born I knew I would love her forever, regardless of who she looks like.

I stop in the small parking lot outside the daycare center and take a deep breath
to steel my nerves. I don’t want Ari to see how terrified I am. I want her to see that I’m brave, even if that’s the last thing I feel. I climb out and open Ari’s door. She looks up at me and smiles, all her new teeth on full display. “You ready to make some new friends, monkey?” I ask her while unbuckling her car seat.

Her eyes widen, filling with excitement and curiosity. “Yes mommy! You
a monkey!” she squeals, giggling.

I let out a little laugh. “Oh, really? If I’m a monkey, then what are you?”

Her little eyebrows scrunch before she answers. “I’m a pwincess,” she proclaims. I take her bag from the back seat and pull her onto my hip.

“Yes,” I reply softly, placing a kiss on her forehead. “You’re my little princess.”

Chapter 2

~ Cameron ~

I roll over in bed and immediately feel hands all over my lower body. I don’t need to open my eyes to know who it is, or what she’s doing, because this is a regular morning wake-up call for me. Rachel’s mouth trails down my stomach, lowering until her hot breath blows over my morning wood. My cock jerks, a little sensitive to the heat of her mouth, and she giggles.

“I see someone’s a little eager for some play time,” she purrs. I open one eye and look down the length of my body to where her head is. Her grin is seductive, and sexy, yet something about this feels…old. The only excitement I feel is the physical kind, but I’d be an idiot to turn this down. I watch her mouth wrap around the tip of my cock and drop my head back as a groan escapes from my mouth.  I reach down, grabbing Rachel’s bleached blonde hair, and guide her until my tip hits the back of her throat. I wonder idly if Rachel would still wake me up like this if we were actually a couple, or if she only does it in the hopes that I’ll make whatever we are ‘official’. If that’s the case, I see many more mornings just like this in my near future because as far as mine and Rachel’s relationship status is concerned, we’re nothing more than ‘fuck buddies’, as my best friend Noah likes to call it.

My hips jerk wildly and I screw my eyes shut as my orgasm rips me into shreds. When I manage to calm my erratic breathing, I open my eyes to a very naked Rachel straddling my waist. She leans down to kiss me and I oblige. There is no spark, no electricity. Nothing. At least not from my side. I’m willing to bet Rachel is hearing wedding bells right now. Too bad I couldn’t care less. She rubs herself on me, sliding up and down, getting me hard again. Her moan should encourage me to take care of her, like she did me, but I feel no such inclination. I sit up, grab her hips, and pull her from my waist. “I’m going to shower,” I say callously. “I have to take Jordan to daycare before class.” Her pout becomes a scowl.

“What about me?” she asks petulantly. I climb out of bed, not caring that I’m buck ass naked, and look at her over my shoulder.

“Maybe later, babe,” I shrug.

She huffs behind me. “You’re such a jerk, Cam.”

With an eye roll, I walk into my bathroom. “You knew that when we started fucking around, Rachel. Feel free to leave,” I half-yell through my bathroom door. The sound of the shower turning on drowns out whatever obscenity Rachel is yelling and I focus on nothing but the water. It provides the kind of refuge I find when I’m in the pool. A thrill passes through me at the thought of a new swimming season starting. I never stop training, but there’s something exhilarating about a new competitive season that makes my pulse race. Our first meet, which is at home, is in two weeks against Vanderbilt and will be the perfect excuse to spend more time in the pool than at home. My mother won’t like it, but she’ll understand. It’s too difficult being here. The last two years have haunted me. My guilt and self-contempt plague me, as do the memories of how I ruined our perfect family. At least when I’m in the pool, I don’t think, I don’t feel. I just glide through the water, free of, well, everything.

I step out of the shower and dry myself off. When I walk back out into my room, Rachel is nowhere to be found and I sigh in relief. I would hate to kick her out, especially after the killer blowjob she gave me, but I don’t tolerate drama and that girl thrives on it. There’s no need to add to the rigid atmosphere that holds us captive in this house. I dress quickly, pack my bag and make my way downstairs. My classes only start at eleven, but I have to take my three-year-old nephew, Jordan, to daycare and then meet Noah at the coffee shop on campus. I walk into the kitchen and find my mother sitting down at the breakfast counter, her back to me. Jordan is propped up in his high chair with a bowl in front of him. The chocolate cereal decorates his mouth as well as every surface around him.

“Oh, Jordan, eat nicely!” my mother admonishes with a shake of her head. Jordan laughs, finding my mother hilarious, and she can’t help but laugh with him. I listen to the sound of her laughter filling the kitchen for the first time in two years. I wish she’d laugh more, it’s a beautiful sound, and so is the smile I know that accompanies it. But I’m the reason she doesn’t laugh anymore. And it kills me.