Read Pick-me-up Online

Authors: Cecilia La France

Tags: #drugs, #high school, #meth, #iowa, #meth addiction, #iowa small towns, #abuse first love, #abuse child teen and adult, #drugs recovery family, #abused teen, #dropout, #drugs abuse, #drugs and violence, #methampethamine, #methamphetamine addiction

Pick-me-up (3 page)

“Don’t! Turn them off!” she yelled at him.
Self consciously, she wondered if she looked like she had been
crying and if he could have seen it within those brief seconds.

The room went dark again.

“Sorry. Thought I’d shed some light on the
matter,” he joked. She could now picture a face to go with the
words. His face had been friendly, amused and slightly smiling. His
face looked like a man’s face, not like those of the boyish
features of her fellow freshmen classmates. He couldn’t be that
old, though. He still looked playful, despite a scruffy head full
of dark hair. Combined with his lanky, lean frame, he was
attractive—not cute, but decidedly masculine attractive.

Suddenly she became timid. Katelyn wasn’t as
carefree in talking to boys as her sisters or her friends. Katelyn
envied her girlfriends at school who knew how to come up with funny
lines or comments that would get the boys’ attention. The only boy
Katelyn felt at ease talking to was her cousin or J.R., her first
and only boyfriend back in sixth grade when the term “boyfriend”
meant nothing more than giggles at the mention of his name.

“What gives, sister?” the dark shape asked
from his position by the door with a voice free of mockery now. In
fact, he seemed genuinely curious, concerned even.

“I duhhno,” Katelyn quickly mumbled,
instantly regretting the grunting sound. “I guess I don’t want to
be around anyone right now.”

“Well, that makes two of us,” he said. “Do
you mind if I hang out here with you? Or, is this a one-person
hideout?”

“No,” Katelyn started, already at a loss for
the right words, “I didn’t mean no to you. I mean, I don’t know
you, so it’s not you,” she began to ramble nervously. She gave up
and sighed, slumping back against the wall, “Just, I don’t want to
be out there.”

The stranger moved away from his lean on the
door. “Look,” he said, “why don’t I start out again. I’m Tim.”

Katelyn struggled momentarily with a
remaining doubt of caution. “Hi, Tim,” she surrendered. “I’m
Katelyn.”

 

*****

 

“Mom, I’m going to go apply at Scoop’s,”
Katelyn yelled down the basement stairs to the laundry room. It was
Sunday afternoon and Katelyn had already finished a list of chores
her mom made for her.

Her mom appeared at the bottom of the steps,
mismatched socks in each hand. “Be home by four. I’m taking an
extra shift tonight and need you to watch the kids.”

Katelyn put her hand on her hip. “Can’t
Brianna watch them?” It was already two o’clock and two hours was
cutting her plans short. Katelyn did intend to go to Scoop’s, the
local ice cream shop, but not to apply for a job. Tim said he’d
meet her there.

Her mom answered from back in the laundry
room. “I said she could go to a movie.” Katelyn knew that
complaining wouldn’t do any good, but she still rolled her eyes
even though no one would see it. Her little sister, Brianna, didn’t
have to do nearly as much around the house as she did. Brianna was
always running off with her friends. Katelyn tried to remember if
she had as much freedom when she was Brianna’s age three years ago.
She opened her mouth to argue the point with her mom, but the sound
of the dryer slamming shut made her change her mind. She wanted to
stay in a good mood for Tim.

Katelyn left the house and walked faster than
usual in the surprisingly warm spring afternoon. By the time she
reached Scoops, Tim was waiting on a bench out back of the store.
He bought her a cone and they walked over to Timber Park, the
town’s new sports complex still under construction. Acres of woods
had been stripped in order to make more fields and parking lots for
moms to park their SUVs and yell at their soccer brats. A little
league team was holding their first practice on one field. Katelyn
and Tim walked on toward the aquatic center at the corner, which
wasn’t open yet for the season. They ended up at a picnic table
behind the buildings, out of the view of any traffic.

Being outside, in public, and during the day
with Tim was new for Katelyn. Since meeting Tim on Friday night,
they talked on the phone and met up again at Jenny’s apartment
Saturday night. Katelyn felt comfortable talking to him. Tim wasn’t
pushy and didn’t act nervous to talk to her. Plus, he would come up
with the strangest questions that would lead to even more
interesting stories as answers. She was learning a lot about Tim,
but Katelyn wasn’t sure of one thing—What did he want with her?
Katelyn didn’t have a history of boyfriends, so she felt like an
amateur. Tim hadn’t tried to touch her or kiss her. At Jenny’s, he
sat on the floor instead of on the couch next to her.

She wondered, Am I just a fun person to talk
to? Does he like me, or does he just want to be a friend? Good God,
does he already have a girlfriend?

Katelyn sat backward on the seat, leaning
back against the table, but Tim surprised her by sitting right next
to her. He straddled the seat facing her. She laughed nervously as
the table lilted with his added weight and her ice cream bumped
against her chin. Great, now I look like an idiot, too, she
thought.

Katelyn began to wipe it off with a napkin,
and Tim reached out to touch a spot she missed. He pushed gently
into her skin and smoothed his finger down and away. The movement
left her speechless and frozen in place. She watched as he brought
the finger back to his mouth and licked it. He paused briefly and
then moved closer, returning his finger to her chin to gently run
its calloused tip along her jaw line and then down her neck to her
collarbone. His whole hand slipped behind her neck then, pulling
her gently to him; his eyes never left her face, flitting briefly
between her eyes and to where he touched her.

She closed her eyes as she watched his close
and their lips met just after the tip of his nose slid into the
side of hers. He was taller than her, like most people, and she
turned her head up to meet his down-turned face. He pressed his
lips softly, but firmly against hers, loosely closed. She felt the
thumb of his hand move in a caress along the pulse of her neck and
her lips opened as if told. He seemed to guide them with his,
sliding his slightly lower where she felt his tongue tease along
the sensitive flesh.

When it was over, he drew her to him and held
her around the shoulders, her head resting on his lean upper
shoulder. Katelyn relaxed. She had her answers.

 

Chapter 4: Little
Sister

The next
morning, the lights came on in Katelyn’s small bedroom without
warning.

“Mom says to get up,” her younger sister’s
voice mocked with corrupt authority from the door. “You’re late for
school again,” Brianna teased. “You’re gonna be in trouble.”

Katelyn rolled her head out from under the
pillow where she hid from her alarm clock 20 minutes ago. She
squinted at her sister who stood with a smug look on her face.
Brianna started rummaging through Katelyn’s things, which were
scattered across the top of her dresser. The door stood wide open,
and the crying of her nephew, Jacob, made its way to her ears.

“Get out!” Katelyn yelled. “Get out of my
room!” Her head flopped back on the bed.

Brianna didn’t seem bothered and even took
another step into the room, her eyes attracted to the stack of
clean laundry on the desk chair. Katelyn was several sizes bigger,
but Brianna still “borrowed” her printed t-shirts. “Dad didn’t come
home last night. Mom’s pissed. I had to wake her to take us to
school. She doesn’t know where he is, either.”

Katelyn heard the news of her dad’s absence
and closed her eyes tighter. Her head took on more weight than just
lack of sleep.

Brianna grew quiet, which only made Katelyn
suspicious. Even in her foggy state of mind, she knew to not trust
that Brianna had left on her own accord. She opened her eyes to see
her sister’s back toward her, her head bent in concentration on
something she held in her hands.

“Leave my stuff alone. Mom!” she yelled.

Brianna turned around with a big smile on her
face and her eyes still glued to Katelyn’s mobile phone screen. “’C
u tomorrow.’ ‘Now I have something 2 look forward 2.’ ‘Maybe u will
find what u r looking 4 after all.’” Brianna rattled on with her
mocking tone, reading Katelyn’s chat messages from the night before
while making her escape from the room. Katelyn was on her feet now,
lunging at her sister and her phone. Suddenly, she was wide
awake.

“Give me my phone, you little brat!” She
hissed at her sister, who had turned and was making a full run down
the hall into the living room.

“Katelyn’s got a boyfriend,” Brianna taunted
as she ran toward the kitchen and around to the other side of the
table. “Katelyn’s got a boyfriend.”

Katelyn rounded the kitchen in her oversized
t-shirt and put on the brakes when she caught sight of her mother
sitting on the other side of the table. One hand gripped a coffee
cup and the other perched upright like a mannequin’s to keep the
cigarette smoke from her eyes. Katelyn instantly checked herself,
recognizing her mother’s fragile mood. Her mom’s eyelids drooped,
and dark shadows hid in the lines under her tired eyes. Her mouth
was set firmly in a partial frown; her whole body slumped. Katelyn
usually didn’t mess with her mom when she was in this state. She
felt bad for her most of the time, and tried to give her space. No
one else seemed to, though.

Brianna waved the phone in the air behind her
mom’s head and stuck her tongue out at Katelyn.

Katelyn crossed her arms in front of her.
“Real mature,” she said in a snide voice. Brianna, despite being
eleven, only three years younger, still acted like a spoiled little
kid. Maybe it was because she was the youngest, she just wouldn’t
grow up. Of course, Brianna hadn’t been allowed to be the youngest
in the past few years. There always seemed to be nieces and nephews
from one of their two older sisters staying at the house.

As if on cue, a crying toddler waddled in,
saw Katelyn, and headed her way. Kayla was still in her pajamas,
and, from the looks of the dirt on her bare feet and the Kool-aid
stained mouth, she hadn’t received her bath last night. “Kate’n,”
she cried with a new burst of tears generated to gain
attention.

Katelyn turned away from her niece to face
her mom. “Mom, make her give it back. She’s got my phone,” Katelyn
demanded.

“Come and get it,” Brianna teased.

Kayla had reached Katelyn’s legs and pulled
on the bottom of her t-shirt. Her niece’s whine took a small break
while she sucked in new air. Before she started again,
instinctually, Katelyn picked up Kayla and perched her on her hip,
which she shifted to one side to counter her weight. Kayla
instantly stopped her crying and cuddled into Katelyn’s
shoulder.

“Mommm,” Katelyn whined, turning her
attention back to her stolen cell phone.

Her mom took her time rubbing out the
burned-down cigarette butt in the ashtray without responding.
Katelyn’s mom shifted slightly in her chair and drew in a deep
breath. Irritation leaked through her every move, but she wouldn’t
yell, Katelyn knew. Years ago, when her parents made her see a
“family therapist,” Katelyn was asked what she most wanted to
change in her home life. Amazingly, with only a few exceptions, her
mom gave in to her request: no yelling.

Katelyn and her mom had always had a special
bond. Katelyn knew she was cared for differently than her older
sisters had been. It was in the motherly actions. Her mom took
Katelyn shopping in the petite section, helping her find clothes to
fit Katelyn’s short frame and still look like a teenager. And,
there were other gifts Katelyn received that were more personable
than what her mom bought the other girls. Plus, her mom was always
in her business, which was annoying, but showed she cared.

Once, in seventh grade, Katelyn gave her mom
a poem she wrote about mothers. Her mom had it framed and hung it
just outside the kitchen. Even now, Katelyn would sometimes catch
her mom staring at it with a faint look of pride in her eyes.

But, her mom could yell. And, the whole
neighborhood knew it. When her mom was mad, her voice boomed and
she found words Katelyn knew never to utter herself. The moments of
greatest fear in Katelyn’s childhood were those when her mother was
yelling at her. The second scariest moments were when her mom
yelled at her dad.

Since the family counseling sessions, part of
a patch when her parents had separated for a while, her mom made a
conscious effort not to yell, at least not at the kids. So, Katelyn
was used to her deep breaths and the counting before her mom would
respond.

After a smooth exhale without coughing,
Katelyn’s mom extended her free hand and held her palm open. She
didn’t even have to say a word. Brianna seemed to deflate in front
of Katelyn’s eyes and the cell phone was slapped gently into the
waiting palm.

“Go get Jacob and Kayla in their car seats,”
her mom said to Brianna in a deep, firm tone that left no room for
argument. Brianna didn’t look up to see Katelyn’s victory smirk;
she stomped down the hall to her mother’s room where Jacob slept in
his crib.

Katelyn put the sleepy Kayla down gently. “Go
with Auntie Bri and get some clothes. We’ll go on a car ride,
okay?” Kayla nodded and left down the hall.

She stood back up to end the morning drama.
Katelyn reached an open hand across the table for the mobile phone
and humbly said, “Thanks, mom.” But, instead of giving her the
phone, her mom held it still and stared at Katelyn.

“Who’s this boy?” Her mom asked.

“He’s just this guy,” Katelyn evaded as best
she could.

“What’s his name?”

“Tim,” Katelyn said shortly. “Can I have my
phone?”

“Tim who?”

“Felske,” and Katelyn fielded the next
question, growing impatient. “You don’t know him. He moved here
with his mom from Des Moines last year.” Her mom still stared at
her, waiting for more. “What? He’s not my boyfriend. I just met
him, and,” Katelyn looked for safe words, both for her and for her
mom’s understanding, “and he’s nice. That’s all.”

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