Authors: Carly Phillips
Evan didn’t react to Cole. “Mark my words, when he’s gone, you’re going to want your career to fall back on. Not to mention your friends, and no matter how I come off, I am that.”
Erin’s eyes glistened and Cole realized the bastard had hit a nerve.
“You’re finished, Carmichael.” Cole started for the man but Evan held up his hands.
“Take it easy. I’m going. And if you really cared about what was best for Erin? You’d do the same thing.” Carmichael stormed out of the room, his shoulder deliberately bumping Cole’s on the way out.
• • •
By the time lunch hour rolled around, Erin still hadn’t
processed the scene in her office, and wasn’t sure she wanted to. Both men infuriated her. Good thing she already had lunch plans with Macy, the one person she could really talk to. And since she’d already given Cole her schedule when she came in this morning, there was no reason to speak to him now.
She strode out of her office. “I’m going to lunch,” she told him, and kept on walking.
He rose to his feet and kept pace with her as she made her way to the parking lot. The one good thing about her fit of pique was that she didn’t stop to worry about being scared, just pushed the thought out of her head and headed for the car.
“Are we going to talk?” he asked her.
“I have nothing to say.” She still couldn’t believe he’d gotten in the middle of a work discussion with her boss, any more than she could believe the personal comments Evan had thrown at her about Cole.
Knowing it was an exercise in futility, Erin had long since stopped arguing with Cole over letting her drive.
He settled in the driver’s seat of her Jeep. But instead of starting up the engine, he turned to face her. “You’re mad.”
“You think?” she asked, voice rising. “Where did you get off answering Evan for me? We were discussing plans we’d made, plans that had nothing to do with you.”
She stared at her clenched hands, willing herself not to get into anything personal with him. He merely needed to respect her boundaries, and he’d crossed over them today.
“What did I tell you when I moved in with you?” He didn’t wait for her reply. “Where you go, I go. I was just making that clear to
Mr. I Want to Be One Half of a Power Couple in This Town.
”
She swung around to face him, all her earlier resolve to remain calm flying south in the face of his words. “Careful, Cole. You almost sound jealous, and we both know that’s not the kind of relationship you want, because you can’t promise me any kind of happily ever after. No commitment.”
He sucked in a sharp breath at her sudden fury. Well, let him get used to it, because she had more to say. “Well, guess what? Evan or some other man can give me what I want,” she said, on a roll and unable to stop the flow of words spouting from her mouth. “Just because we’re going to be raising a child together doesn’t give you the right to dictate whether I can see other men!”
His eyes narrowed to mere slits, the navy irises turning nearly black as a low growl emanated from his chest. “Let’s get something straight, okay? As long as you’re in danger, I damn well can and will dictate who you see. And if you’re sleeping in my bed, you sure as hell won’t be going on a
date
, business or otherwise, with some other man.” A muscle ticked in his jaw, his anger a match for hers.
But his possessive tone startled her, and he wasn’t finished. Before she could blink, he’d wrapped his hand around the back of her neck and pulled her across the center console, sealing his lips over hers.
Erin lifted her hands to his chest, to push the arrogant man away, even as a part of her was unreasonably affected by his jealous display. His mouth made it perfectly clear this was about more than mere obligation, that he was more affected by her than he’d let on. While she’d been fighting to keep her feelings out of the equation, just maybe he’d been doing the same thing.
She didn’t shove him away, but she didn’t welcome him either.
Until he licked his tongue over her lips and whispered, “Open for me, honey.”
Accepting that in this, they were equally affected, she did as he seductively asked, letting him inside. His kiss was as possessive as his words and she melted into him, allowing him to overwhelm her common sense with sweeps of his tongue and nibbles on her lips. She lost herself in his delicious scent, the amazing way he kissed, as if she were the only thing that mattered.
He finally lifted his head and looked into her eyes. “Are we clear?”
“Arrogant son of a bitch,” she muttered, finding it hard to believe she could be falling for this man. Finding it impossible not to.
He looked after her, protected her, cooked her meals, and kissed like a dream—but he also came with a boatload of issues and warnings.
Did she dare give in to this thing between them on the mere whisper of hope that he could get beyond his past and let her in? When she had no doubt that taking that risk would leave her heart shredded if—and when—his own words came true?
“Erin? I said, are we clear?” He still held the back of her head in his strong hand.
As long as he touched her, she couldn’t focus. She desperately needed to think.
“We’re clear,” she said, buying herself time to decide what her next step ought to be.
• • •
They walked into The Family Restaurant and Erin
immediately headed for Macy, leaving Cole alone. Good thing for him that when he’d seen Erin’s full schedule, he’d asked Nick to meet him for lunch. He settled into a seat with a decent view of both the front door and Erin’s table, his head swimming from how badly he’d fucked up this morning with Erin and her boss. Then continued to screw up worse in the car ride over here.
What the hell had he been thinking, staking any kind of claim? He hadn’t been using the right head, that was for certain. Cole needed a strong drink to get his thoughts straight, but since that wouldn’t be happening, he’d settle for a swift kick in the ass. He hoped he could count on his cousin to give it to him and remind him why he needed to keep his distance from Erin.
A glance at Erin told him she and Macy sat with heads bent together, and though Erin hadn’t looked at him since they walked in, Macy did. She glanced up at him and waved. Her grin had a calculating look that had the hair on the back of his neck standing on end.
“Hey,” Nick said, drawing Cole out of his brooding thoughts.
“Thanks for coming.”
Nick settled into the chair across from him. “Well, you look like hell.” Nick gestured to the waitress, a young woman neither of them knew.
She walked over and smiled. “What can I get you?”
“I’ll take a Coke and the meat loaf special,” Nick said without looking at the menu.
“You?” She turned to Cole.
“Same.”
The redhead scribbled their orders and walked away.
“So what’s got you in knots?” Nick leaned back in his seat, looking more relaxed than Cole had ever seen him, and considering Nick’s easygoing personality, that was saying something.
Cole didn’t pretend not to know what his cousin was talking about. “I am so screwed,” he said out loud.
Nick barked out a laugh. “That’s got to refer to a woman, and since the whole town knows you’re watching out for Erin Marsden, I’m guessing she’s the one.”
Only the waitress’s return with their sodas prevented Cole from answering.
When she walked away, Cole tipped his head toward the women’s table. “Those two? I think they’re plotting something.”
Nick turned Erin and Macy’s way and burst out laughing. Again. “I can see why you’d think that, but seriously, what gives?”
Cole debated how much to tell Nick, then decided that since Erin had already confided in her best friend and her brothers wanted his head, Cole might as well have someone in his corner.
He leaned closer to his cousin. “Erin’s pregnant.”
Nick choked on his drink. “No way. This is Erin we’re talking about. The chief’s daughter. The same girl who never stepped out of the lines a day in her life.”
“Doesn’t make her a nun,” Cole said, sounding defensive even to his own ears.
“Point taken.” Nick paused, probably to digest the information. “Man, I don’t envy the father. Her brothers are going to string him up by the . . .”
“Balls,” Cole finished for him. “Yeah, they probably would if they didn’t need me to watch out for her twenty-four seven.”
Nick’s eyes opened wide. “Oh, shit,” he muttered, the revelation sinking in. “What are you going to do?”
“Support her and the baby. What else?” At least he had a healthy savings account, courtesy of living undercover and not spending what he earned.
“Oh, I don’t know.” Nick raised an eyebrow, looking at Cole like he was an utter moron. “You knocked up about the sweetest girl in town. Did you even consider mar—”
“Do not say that word.” Cole’s mouth grew dry at the mere thought of tying Erin to him in any legal way. She deserved so much better, so much more than he could ever hope to give her.
Nick scowled. “Come on, man. You need to at least consider it.”
Cole shook his head. “Think about what you just said. She’s sweet and good. Then you’ve got me. The bane of my father’s existence, coming out of a world that’s dark and ugly, with plans to head back under. What part of me and my life is good for her?” he asked, laying the truth out for his cousin and for himself.
Because sometimes Erin got to him so badly even he needed a reminder.
“Are you seriously going back under?” Nick asked. “I was hoping you’d give it up and try living a normal life.”
Cole let out a harsh laugh. “What the hell do I know about normal? Did my father come home to family dinners with my mom like June and Ward Cleaver? Or did he come in slamming doors, grumbling about her crappy cooking and whatever shit he could throw at me? I don’t have real friends other than you, because I’m not in one place, living my own life, long enough to make any. Is that the kind of life you think she wants?” he asked, his tone harsh but his voice low.
“I think that’s up to her to decide.”
Cole set his jaw. “She deserves better.”
“Sounds like bullshit excuses to me.”
“Shut up. I know what I’m talking about. Even her brothers agree.”
Nick assessed him with a knowing stare. “Again, it only matters what you want and what Erin agrees to accept for herself.”
Cole didn’t reply. Circular arguments weren’t his thing.
But Nick being Nick, he wouldn’t give up—which served him well, since that’s how he had finally convinced Kate he meant it when he said he wanted her. And only her. Cole still liked to give him shit about setting Kate up to spend time alone with him. He had to give his cousin credit for ingenuity.
“Unless it really is just sex for you, in which case, let her go. Give her up, see your kid on occasion, when Erin and whichever schmuck she marries give you time.”
Yeah, like Cole thought, Nick didn’t give up. “Leave it alone,” he told the other man.
Nick braced his arms on the table and leaned in close. “Somebody has to spell things out for you, because you’re too stubborn to see things clearly. In that way, sorry to tell you, you’re just like your old man.”
Cole’s hands clenched into fists.
“Chill out. Just giving you something to think about. So I suggest you take the next however many months until she’s due to sort through your issues. A kid’s not something to take lightly,” Nick said, as serious as Cole had ever seen him.
“I’m not taking anything about this lightly.”
Nick shook his head and let out a groan. “You’d better not be. Take it from someone who had to fight for the woman he wanted. It’s worth it. And so is she.” He tipped his head toward Erin.
She was worth it, Cole thought. And that was the exact reason he was sticking to his plan. But for now? While he was here, living in her house, protecting her, taking care of her?
She was his—until he had no choice but to let her go.
Because Erin was starving, Macy, being a good pal
whose family owned The Family Restaurant, went into the kitchen and returned with a big hunk of chocolate seven-layer cake that had Erin’s name written all over it.
Erin eyed the dessert and sighed with pleasure. “I have so earned that baby.” She picked up her fork, ready to dig in. “Come to mama,” she said, and whisked the plate from Macy’s grasp.
“Okay, if you need chocolate, you must not be getting sex.”
Erin paused, her fork halfway to her lips. “I’m getting. Sort of,” she said, shoving the fork in, hoping Macy would change the subject.
Macy snatched the plate away. “Spill.”
Erin scowled at her friend, but knew she wouldn’t get her cake back until she explained. “Fine. We slept together again, but before we did, he made it perfectly clear it didn’t change the future. And I agreed.”
Macy shook her head sadly. “And here I thought the man had potential.”
“Not finished,” Erin said, eyeing the cake longingly. It was her dessert. “I backed off the next day. There’s no way I’m going to let myself get emotionally involved when I know the outcome ahead of time. But then he’ll say and do things that lead me to believe he feels more than he’s admitting to me or to himself.”
“Such as?”
Erin shrugged. “Acting all possessive. I mean, get this: He
forbade
me to go to the Bar Association event with Evan. He said, and I quote, ‘If you’re sleeping in my bed, you sure as hell won’t be going on a
date
, business or otherwise, with some other man,’” she said in a baritone imitation of Cole’s voice.
Macy chuckled but her eyes opened wide. “Did you kick him in the nuts for ordering you around?”
“He was driving. Can I have my cake back now?”
“I’ll rephrase. Did you want to kick him in the nuts for ordering you around?”
No. No, I did not,
Erin thought, knowing her reaction had been a shock to herself at the time.
“You’re blushing!” Macy squealed.
“Shh!”
“So . . . you liked his command.”
Erin resigned herself to the inevitable mortification. “It turned me on,” she whispered. “Now give me my cake!” Her voice rose in direct relation to her frustration.
Macy grinned and returned the plate.
Erin dug in. “Thank God, Aunt Lulu is back with you. This cake is something else.”
“Aunt Lulu is still hoping for a settlement from the grocery store. What do you think her chances are?”
“Good, actually. Turns out there’s a family feud going on over who should be able to run the business. The high-powered legal team was one brother’s way of trying to manipulate the other brother into caving. Long story. Anyway, when I found out what was going on, I called the father who’d left his two moron sons fighting over the running of his business while he retired in Florida.”
“Family-run businesses can get hairy.” Macy shuddered, knowing that truth from experience.
Erin nodded. “I told the father that if he didn’t come home and choose, his sons would bankrupt the business in no time.” She grinned. “I’m betting Aunt Lulu gets a nice settlement and the whole thing goes away.”
Macy’s smile grew wider. “Thank you. She’ll be thrilled!”
“You’re welcome.” Erin licked the back of the fork and placed the utensil on the plate, finally full.
“Now that you’re sated . . . so to speak . . . let’s talk about what you’re going to do to get the big lug to see if you two can make a go of any sort of relationship.” Macy waggled her eyebrows.
“Not happening. He made that clear.”
“But his actions are saying something else, yes?”
Erin shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. He’s stubborn.”
“So, my friend, are you. The way I see it, you can go all in, sleep with him as long as he’s staying with you and seems interested, go through the baby thing together and hope that he sees what an amazing woman you are and what a great life he could have. Then if he doesn’t come around, you can kick him in the nuts.” Macy grinned. “Or you can give up now without ever really trying.”
Erin wasn’t a quitter. She didn’t give up when things got tough or she wouldn’t have survived law school or the bar exam. She understood she’d had it easier than many of her friends, no major drama in her life.
Until now, that is,
she thought, glancing down at her stomach.
“So which will it be?” Macy asked. “And decide quick, because he’s on his way over here. You in or out?”
Erin straightened her shoulders and set her jaw. “In.” She was in.
“Hello, ladies,” Nick Mancini greeted them before Cole said a word.
“Hi, Nick. How’s the wife?” Macy asked.
“Pretty damned good.” And from his wide grin, Erin figured he more than meant it.
“Which reminds me, Kate and I are having a small get-together on Sunday for family and friends. We’d love it if you two came.”
“You are?” Cole asked. “You didn’t say a word to me.”
“Because you always turn me down. But if this lovely lady says yes, you’ll have no choice, because you’re her shadow these days.” Nick laughed, obviously pleased with his way of thinking.
Cole’s low growl of annoyance didn’t surprise Erin, and she swallowed a chuckle. Obviously Nick knew his cousin well.
“So can I let Kate know you’ll both be there?” Nick asked.
Erin glanced at Macy. It had been so long since she’d been out with friends, just having a good time.
Her friend inclined her head and nodded. “I’d love to come.”
“Same!” Erin said excitedly, but without meeting Cole’s gaze.
“I’ll call Kate and see what she needs in the way of food,” Macy told Nick.
“And I’ll bring one of Aunt Lulu’s cakes,” Erin said before Macy could take over that idea.
“Because we all know you can’t cook.” Macy snickered.
Erin shook her head. “I’ll have you know that Cole promised to teach me,” Erin said, knowing that in that instant, she’d mentally and verbally committed to her course of action. She’d drop her guard and let him in, hoping he’d do the same.
And if things fell apart? Well, like Macy said, at least she’d know she’d given it her best effort. Then when he left, she’d have a baby to raise and a job to keep her so busy she wouldn’t have time to miss him when he was gone.
It was a nice lie she told herself, anyway. The distinct ringing of a cell phone broke into Erin’s thoughts.
She looked to where the sound came from as Cole pulled his phone from his pocket. “Sanders,” he said. “What do you have for me?”
He listened, his steady gaze never leaving Erin. It had to be answers on the ballistics from her shooting. Her stomach in knots, she leaned forward, waiting for him to finish the call.
“Yeah, I got it. I’ll pass it on to someone who can run down the lead. Expect a call from a Mike Marsden. Thanks. I owe you one.” He ended the call and looked at Erin. “They traced the bullet to a gun used in a shooting last year. With a little luck, the guy who owns it is someone for hire or he can tell us where he unloaded the gun or who has it now. It’s a long shot, but it’s all we’ve got.”
Erin drank a long sip of water to ease the dryness in her mouth. “At least it’s something.”
“I’m going to step outside and call Mike. Let him get the information and start to run down the lead. I’ll be right back. Don’t move,” he ordered Erin.
Since she was suddenly dizzy and shaken, she wasn’t about to argue with the command.
• • •
Although Erin had decided to go all in with Cole, after
his possessive show about sleeping with her and her not seeing other men, she’d also expected him to act first. But in the last forty-eight hours, he’d been on his best behavior, leaving Erin with the decision about how to start showing him the kind of future he could have with her. It wasn’t all about sex; that much she understood.
A life with her included friends, family, dinners out, and work functions. She had the latter coming up Saturday night and she’d already informed Cole he’d need a suit and tie, which had necessitated a mall trip after work the other day. They had Nick’s party on Sunday, which was another place she could out them in public by being affectionate in front of others,
if
that was her intention. But she couldn’t do any of those things if she and Cole didn’t establish a change in their relationship here. At home.
It would have to be tonight, then, Erin decided, nerves making her stomach dance and flutter. But first she had to deal with welcoming her parents home, and of course telling them her news. From the shooting to her pregnancy, they were completely in the dark.
She had no desire to have such a personal conversation in front of her brothers, who were already biased against Cole. In fact, she decided she’d have to talk to her mom alone, and discuss how to break the truth to her father. She didn’t think her brothers would have the nerve to be the ones to tell Simon that news.
Erin changed from her work clothes, choosing a sexier panty and bra set than normal because she planned to end up in Cole’s bed. But when she attempted to button her jeans, she had no luck closing them. Overnight they had stopped fitting. She stripped them off, walked to her closet, and began a systematic trying-on of her casual clothes, only to have the same result.
Frustrated, she tossed item by item onto the bed.
“Erin, almost time to go,” Cole called from the hallway, knocking on her door.
“I’m not going anywhere,” she yelled back, eyeing the pile in disbelief.
He entered without knocking.
She didn’t bother to cover up. First, he’d seen it all before. Second, she was too upset with herself for not thinking ahead about buying maternity clothes. And third, she had a plan, and belly or not, she might as well see if he responded.
He did. One look and his eyes glazed with desire, and relief flowed through her. She did everything she could not to squeeze her legs together in an effort to alleviate the sudden ache in her core.
“What’s going on?” he asked, his voice gruff, the raspy sound setting her nerve endings aflame.
“Umm, I’m having a . . . malfunction.”
He cocked his head to one side, his gaze never leaving her exposed body. “Explain.”
She gestured to the bed. His gaze followed the direction of her hand and blinked in shock. “Whoa. Your closet explode?”
“Along with my middle,” she muttered. “Nothing fits.”
He was gentleman enough not to comment. “Why not wear what you had on for work?” he asked, rather diplomatically, she thought.
“That was tight too.” She felt her cheeks heat. “I had to unbutton the skirt and then untuck my shirt so the blouse covered the waist. The skirt kept falling down and it wasn’t comfortable.” She knew she sounded like a grumbling, whiny pain in the ass.
She didn’t care.
Cole chuckled, annoying her further. “What’s so funny?” she snapped.
“Nothing.” He held up both hands, the nervous expression of a man dealing with a hormonal female on his face. “Look, I don’t think your parents would appreciate it if you showed up in my sweatpants. Don’t you have something you can put on until we can get you shopping?”
“We?” Though she ought to be used to him grouping them as a couple whenever she needed to go somewhere or do something, he always caught her off guard.
Or maybe it was the lurch in her chest when he used the term
we
, causing hope to settle in her heart, that upset her so much.
She folded her arms across her chest while he attempted not to look down at her bare legs and the slight swell of her stomach that peeked beneath her silk camisole.
“If you need to go shopping, I’m going to have to drive you, so yes. We. Now, are you going to get dressed for your parents, or is show-and-tell the way you want to break the news?” Cole studied her patiently.
Contrarily, she threw up her hands in frustration. “Fine. These seemed the loosest.” She grabbed a pair of black pants from the pile. “I’ll just leave them unbuttoned and hope nobody notices.”
She waited, but he didn’t leave so she could dress, so she started pulling on her pants anyway.
“Erin?”
“Hmm?”
“I meant it earlier when I offered to go with you to talk to your parents.” He’d offered on the drive home from work and she’d put him off, needing time to think. “I know you don’t need my protection while you’re there with your brothers and father, but you don’t have to face your parents alone.”
His words disarmed her irrational—and yes, hormonal—anger over her lack of wardrobe. As usual when dealing with Cole, her emotions ran the gamut from being frustrated to being thrown completely by his kindness and concern.
“Talk about facing a dad with a shotgun.” She couldn’t help but tease him.
He grimaced and she got serious. “I appreciate you being willing to step up,” she said softly, admiring his courage in his willingness to face her father, the police chief. She drew a deep breath before explaining her decision to go alone. “I just think since we’re not a couple, this is something I need to do on my own.”
Erin might want them to be one, she might be planning to use everything in her arsenal to get him to come around and see things her way, but she wouldn’t set her parents up for disappointment by showing up with Cole to announce her pregnancy. Not when the reality was that she’d be mostly doing this alone.
“Fine,” he bit out, obviously hurt by her answer.
Erin understood, but she hadn’t made her choice lightly. In fact, she’d talked it over with Sam, who so far had been the more rational brother to deal with, and he’d agreed.
Cole stalked to the door and turned, bracing a hand on the frame. “Just come on down when you’re ready. I’ll drop you at your folks’ before I head over to Joe’s. You can ring me when you’re done and I’ll get you on the way home.”
Erin bit down on her lower lip, knowing she was about to dig the knife in deeper. “Umm, my brother called a little while ago. He offered to pick me up and bring me home. I figured I’d give you a break from babysitting me and said yes.”
Cole’s hand tightened on the doorframe. “Fucking Mike.”
Erin winced. “Actually, it was Sam.” She just hadn’t had a chance to tell Cole he was off duty before her clothing dilemma sidetracked her.