Authors: Anna Jacobs
When he got near the flats, he slowed to a sudden stop and parked by the side of the road because a man was standing over Janey and she looked terrified. They didn’t seem to have noticed him, so he got out of the car and moved closer to them, staying behind a tree. Because he was wearing sneakers he could move silently.
As he stopped to watch, the man laid one hand on Janey’s arm, gripping it tightly. That was not a polite hold.
She wrenched away from him, standing defensively between him and the buggy.
He laughed at her and grabbed her arm again, throwing
her aside so hard she staggered a few steps. Taking hold of the buggy handle, he began shaking it hard, making Millie cry in fear.
Janey didn’t move, staring at the man like a mouse trapped by a cat.
Kieran waited to see if he could learn anything more about this bully, who fortunately had his back to the street. The two others were so engrossed in their confrontation that neither of them noticed him and he was able to hear part of what they were saying.
‘Either you take me up to your flat and be a good little girl, or there will be an accident. It’s not hard to hurt a baby, and these buggies tip over so easily.’ He feigned tipping the buggy over and Janey shrieked in terror.
‘Don’t! Don’t! Why are you doing this? Haven’t you hurt me enough?’
The man laughed softly. ‘No. Not nearly enough. Now, move inside! I’ll bring her.’
This was clearly the man who’d raped Janey, the man she was so terrified of that she didn’t dare tell anyone who he was. He thought the fellow was taking a risk, coming after her in the daytime, but the street was very quiet, so he might have got away with it.
Kieran got out his mobile phone and took a photo, then the damn thing began warbling at him, and the man jerked round.
Kieran feigned answering the call, pretending not to be interested in them.
Janey grabbed the buggy and yanked it away from the man, who said loudly, ‘There, it’s working again. Told you I could fix it.’ He turned and walked away.
Kieran watched him move out of sight round the corner of High Street then moved across to Janey, who was standing weeping, near hysterics now.
‘Let’s go inside,’ he said gently.
‘I shan’t be safe even there. He’ll be back. I know he will. It’s only a matter of time before he catches me on my own.’
Kieran didn’t at first know what to say to that, then caught a glimpse of his watch. ‘Look, I have to go somewhere. Let’s get you and Millie inside first. If it’ll make you feel safer, you can stay in my flat till I get back.’
‘Can I? Really? I just have to nip up to get some food and nappies for Millie.’
He didn’t know whether he was doing the right thing leaving her in this upset state, but he needed to pick Nicole up and surely Janey would be safe in his flat?
He went in and studied the windows. He’d thought of getting sheer curtains to guard his privacy during the daytime but hadn’t bothered. Now he would. For the time being, he drew the curtains.
‘Don’t switch the lights on,’ she said. ‘I can see well enough. I don’t want the flat to look occupied.’
He hesitated by the door. ‘Janey, who was that man?’
‘Better if I don’t tell you.’
‘Better for me or better for you?’
‘Both.’
‘You’re that frightened of him?’
She nodded.
What was the world coming to? he thought as he drove off. How could this be happening in a sleepy little town like Sexton Bassett?
But he had enough contacts to find out who the brute was – and he would. He already knew his first name, Gary.
Energy surged through him, the same energy that had once carried him through investigations into companies and millionaires and criminal bosses.
He smiled, thinking,
Welcome back
.
Nicole stood on the steps outside the library, waiting for Kieran, who was a little late. She shivered in the cool air but that didn’t stop her enjoying its freshness after the rather stale air inside.
When his car drew up, she ran down the library steps, happy to see him, but his expression was so grim her happiness evaporated abruptly. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘When I got back to the flats, a man was there, bullying Janey. She looked terrified. He had hold of the buggy and was shaking it hard.’
‘Oh, no! Poor Millie. Did he run off when he saw you?’
‘No, he brazened it out, pretended he’d been fixing the buggy. I’ve seen him somewhere before, but I can’t place him. It’ll come to me, though. She refuses to tell me who he is, though she’s given me a letter revealing all, to be opened in case of trouble.’
‘Will she be safe on her own?’
‘I left her in my flat, as a temporary measure.’
She shook her head. ‘What’s wrong with the world? It’s getting so violent.’
‘I’m not sure it is, on average. The statistics don’t say so. I think it’s just that we hear about it more these days because we’re living in an age of information flow – and of course, violence is affecting both of us and our friends at
the moment.’ He reached out to give her hand a squeeze. ‘I know William’s gone off the rails, but you’ll get past this into calmer waters.’
‘That time can’t come soon enough for me.’
When they got to the hospital she made no effort to leave the car. ‘I’m not looking forward to this.’
‘It must be hard.’
‘It’s not knowing what’s going to happen. Is he going to recover at all or … just get worse until he dies? If he recovers, I’ll have to look after him. And if he doesn’t, what am I going to do, with William running wild? I daren’t even go back to my own home.’
Kieran got out of the car and went round to open her door. When she got out, he pulled her into his arms and gave her a hug. It wasn’t a sexual gesture, just a comforting hug from a friend and she accepted it as such, leaning against him for a moment or two, drawing strength from him.
The warmth of that hug helped her walk into the hospital and up to the ward.
Sam wasn’t in his room. She hurried along to the nurses’ station and they showed her into a private room and fetched the ward sister.
‘I’m afraid the news isn’t good, Mrs Gainsford. Your husband is going downhill rapidly.’
Nicole stared at her incredulously. ‘You mean – he’s dying?’
‘Yes.’
‘How long does he have?’
‘You’ll need to ask the doctor that. He’ll be here in—’ she looked at her fob watch ‘about half an hour. In the meantime I’ll show you where your husband is. Perhaps
you’d like to sit with him? I’ll bring the doctor to you there.’
Sam was lying flat on his back in a tiny, windowless room to one side. It was a room for patients who didn’t see or care about their surroundings. He looked like a wax effigy of her husband, no expression on his face, no movement.
‘I can’t believe it’s ending like this,’ she said aloud. ‘We didn’t even have time to make up our quarrel. Can you hear me, Sam? Or am I talking to myself?’ It felt as if she was and she didn’t speak again.
Time passed very slowly. She kept looking at her watch and finding that two or three minutes only had passed. She wondered if she should go and tell Kieran what she was waiting for, but if she did, she might miss the doctor. So she sat there, fretting internally, numb and motionless externally.
When the door opened, she looked round to see Kieran.
‘I came up to see how things were going. They told me. I’m so sorry.’
She nodded. ‘Would you stay with me? The doctor’s coming in a minute. I’m frightened I won’t remember what he says.’
‘Of course.’
The door opened a few minutes later and a man came in, introduced himself and looked at Kieran.
‘I’m a family friend, here to support Nicole.’
He nodded and turned back to her. ‘I’m afraid it’s not good news.’
‘No. So I gathered. But the nurses wouldn’t tell me any details.’
‘The tumour is affecting just about every function now. He’s not able to speak or move.’
‘Can he hear?’
‘We don’t think so. We can’t be sure, though, so it wouldn’t hurt for you to speak to him as if he can.’
‘What’s going to happen next?’
‘We look after him, make sure he’s in no pain. And we can either try to prolong his life or let nature take its course. Your choice. Do you want him put on a ventilator, if necessary?’
She shuddered, but there was no doubt in her mind. ‘No. I’m sure he wouldn’t want to linger in this state. He was – is a firm believer in euthanasia.’
The doctor made a note on his pad and moved towards the door. ‘You can visit him at any time, day or night.’
She sat very still, waiting for the door to close behind him, then turned towards the bed, feeling she had to say something – in case he could still hear. ‘I’ll be back later, Sam. I’ll bring Paul to see you. William has run away. If I can find him, I’ll send him too.’
It made her shiver that he didn’t respond by so much as the blink of an eyelid. She’d had as much as she could take, so turned towards the door, reaching out for it blindly, her vision blurred by tears. She was aware of Kieran’s arm round her shoulders, aware of the cool air hitting her cheeks as they went out of the hospital, then remembered nothing till they arrived back at her flat.
Paul opened the door and stood aside to let her in. She wanted to reassure him, but couldn’t.
Time seemed to be moving jerkily. She found that she was sitting on the couch. How had she got there? Paul and
Kieran were sitting nearby, watching her anxiously.
‘Sorry. I was just – a bit overwhelmed. Thank you for bringing me home, Kieran. I can’t go back to work. Not now.’
‘If you give me your car key, I’ll go to the library and drive your car back. Can you ring them and let them know I’m coming, then I’ll call a taxi?’
‘Yes.’ After a moment she remembered to say, ‘Thank you’. But he’d gone by then.
Paul watched his mother and when she seemed a bit better, asked quietly, ‘How was Dad?’
‘Not good. They think – he’s only got a few days.’
He stared at her in shock. ‘How can it happen so quickly?’
‘I don’t know. I think it depends on where the tumour spreads and how quickly, I suppose.’
‘William doesn’t even know Dad’s dying.’
‘No. I can’t do much about that, though, because I don’t know where he is. I thought you might like to come and visit your father with me this evening. We don’t have to bother about visiting hours. We can go and see him any time.’
He sat, head bent, staring down at the ground, then took a deep breath and stood up. ‘I’ll come with you if I’m back in time. I need to go out.’
‘Where to?’
‘To find William. I’ve got a few ideas where to look. He has to be told about Dad.’
‘He might attack you.’
‘I’ll risk it. He
has
to know.’
She wanted to stop him, but didn’t think Paul would forgive her if she even tried. He wasn’t a child now, seemed to have grown up very fast during the last few days. As people did in times of crisis. ‘Be careful,’ was all she dared say.
‘I will. But I think I’ll be all right because he’ll want to know. Can you phone the hospital and tell them it’s all right now for William to visit Dad? Don’t call the police. I need to promise him he’s not walking into a trap.’
‘All right. I’ll do that right away. Take care.’
When Kieran got home, he was in pain and had forgotten about Janey. She was still in his flat and looked wan and upset.
He ate a biscuit then took another half tablet. He was not going back on to full tablets. ‘Everything all right?’
‘Yes. No one rang the doorbell and I didn’t see him outside. Sorry for being so wimpy about this, but he frightens me.’
‘He’s a big man.’
‘Yes. And very strong.’ She shivered.
‘I’ll help you upstairs with your things, shall I?’
‘Yes. Thank you. I’ve got my head together now, and besides, there are other people in the building, so I’m pretty safe here. The woman on my floor hardly ever goes out. The last thing he’ll want to do is be seen publicly harassing me.’
‘He was willing to risk approaching you in daytime.’
‘He thought I’d be a pushover. I didn’t really fight back last time, you see. I was so scared I just froze.’
‘Some people do. I gather it’s hard-wired into you how you react to sudden danger.’
At her door he said, ‘If you need help, don’t hesitate to ask.’
‘Thank you. You’re so kind.’
When she’d closed the door he went across the landing to ring her neighbour’s doorbell. A quiet and reclusive woman, Miss Fairbie. He explained quickly that Janey was being stalked, describing Gary.
‘I don’t want to get involved.’
‘You’d ring the police, though, if you thought she was in danger?’
She thought for a moment, then nodded, already shutting the door.
He sighed. Miss Fairbie had her own problems, but he thought she’d help if the worst came to the worst.
Once in his own flat, he went to lie down. The next thing he knew it was the middle of the night, so he used the bathroom and crawled under the covers, fully dressed.
His last thought before he drifted off to sleep again was that he was certainly sleeping better since he’d got involved with Nicole.
Paul went to the headquarters of the group William spent a lot of time with, which looked more like a small, shabby house than the headquarters of anything. He knocked on the door and when a bearded man opened it and scowled at him, said quickly, ‘I’m William Gainsford’s brother. I need to speak to him urgently.’
‘He isn’t here.’
‘Can I leave a message for him?’
The man shrugged.
‘Look, our father’s dying. I need to tell William what’s going on. He’ll want to go and see Dad – while he still can.’
‘And this could be a neat little police trap.’
‘I wish it were. It’s real. Dad’s dying.’ He sniffed, feeling his eyes filling with tears.
‘You’re as soft as William said.’
‘It doesn’t matter whether I’m soft or not. He’ll want to
know about Dad. Tell him I’ll be waiting at our old home to explain and I’ve
not
told the police I’m doing this.’
He turned and walked away, wondering if William was inside the headquarters, wondering whether his brother would come to see him.
He saw the neighbour as he went into his old home, raised one hand but didn’t let her start talking to him. Inside he stopped in shock. It looked as if a bomb had hit the place. Surely they hadn’t left it in this bad a state? Had William been back?
The heating wasn’t on, but he found a blanket and went to sit in the kitchen with it wrapped round his shoulders, waiting. He didn’t switch on the lights as that might bring the police to check things out.
It seemed a long time before he heard a sound outside, but when he squinted at his watch in the moonlight, it was only just over an hour. He turned to see a dim outline of a face at the window. William. It must be.
The door opened but no one came in.
‘It’s not a trap,’ he said in a low voice.
The door banged fully open and William stood on the step but still didn’t come inside.
‘What’s the matter with Dad? Tell me quickly. I’m not staying long.’
‘He’s got a brain tumour and …’ When he’d finished his explanation, Paul said only, ‘I thought you’d want to know.’
His brother looked at him. ‘If you’re telling me lies, setting up a trap, I’ll kill you.’
‘I’m not. Dad’s dying. He only has a few days left. You can visit him any time. Mum’s told the hospital to let you in.’
‘I’ll think about it. Maybe tomorrow.’
And he was gone, just like that. He didn’t say thank you. He didn’t ask about Mum. Well, that sod didn’t care about anyone except himself. He probably wouldn’t go to the hospital, either.
But Paul felt good about what he’d done, which was what mattered most.
His mother was waiting for him at the flat. She looked as if she’d been crying.
‘Did you find your brother?’
‘Yes.’
‘Is he going to see his father?’
‘I don’t know. Who can tell what William’s going to do? Did you ask the people at the hospital to let him in, Mum? You didn’t tell the police, did you? Not about this.’
‘No.’ She came across to hug him. ‘I rang the hospital and said it was all right for him to see his father, told them we’d resolved our differences, given the circumstances, and he was a shift worker.’ She moved towards the kitchen area. ‘Are you hungry? Good. I’ve got some food ready, then we’ll grab a bit of sleep. Kieran’s offered to take us to hospital in the morning. I’ve to ring him. I thought you’d want to come and say goodbye to your dad.’
She paused and looked at him. ‘You don’t have to, if you don’t want.’
‘Yes, I’ll come with you tomorrow.’
Just after one o’clock in the morning, William slipped into the ward, alert in case
they
were waiting for him. The nurse at the reception desk was yawning over some papers and there was no one else around.
When he introduced himself, she said, ‘Ah, yes. Your mother said you might be in quite late. Just come off your shift, have you?’
He stared at her, then nodded.
‘I’ll show you where your father is.’
‘How is he?’
She gave him a pitying look. ‘Going downhill fast, as I expect your mother told you.’
‘Can he – like, hear me if I talk to him?’
‘We don’t know. He isn’t reacting to stimuli at all now, but you should treat him as if he can hear you. I always do. It seems more respectful.’
William followed her into a small room set apart from the others. It made him feel like a rat in a trap. If they tried to capture him here, he’d create mayhem. He flexed his muscles and looked down at his arm admiringly. You could see the biceps even through his clothes now. He needed some more stuff to keep up this progress. When was the stupid nurse going to leave?
She went up to the bed first, to check out the still figure, then turned to beckon him forward. ‘I’ll leave you alone with your father. Would you like a cup of tea?’
It might be drugged. ‘No, thanks. I just had one.’ He kept himself very alert, ready to act. Man the hunter, just as it was meant to be.
After she’d gone, leaving the door slightly ajar, he went to close it, and only then did he move closer to the bed to study his father’s face carefully. He was shocked rigid at what he saw.
This wasn’t his father!
But it was. He shivered. His father seemed more dead
than alive. For once, Paul the Softie had been right. William had needed to come here.
Bending forward, he said in a low voice, ‘I don’t know whether you can hear me, Dad, but I wanted to say goodbye. That’s all, really. I’m sorry you’re dying.’ He stood there for a moment or two, then said, ‘Can’t think of anything else to say. ’Bye now.’ He shrugged off the feeling of helplessness and went out, on the alert for traps.
That fat nurse didn’t even see him go out the back way, towards the fire stairs, because she was talking to someone hidden by the corner of the wall.
It was so easy to do what he wanted. Most people were mugs, doormats, fit only for treading on. He wasn’t.
Outside the hospital, however, the cold bit in and William began to shiver. He did
not
like living on the streets and he damned well wasn’t going to sleep out on a night like this. The only place he could think of going was home. He’d slept up in the roof space last night, on a platform his dad had built across the joists for storing their camping gear. They’d got rid of it years ago, but there were still a couple of tatty old sleeping bags and a few other bits and pieces left up there.
He’d got up into the roof by standing on the banisters and pulling himself up. He woke up when the police came in to check out the house and smiled as he heard them moving round. They’d not catch him.
They came back again just as it was starting to get light, without suspecting that he was overhead. He was a lot smarter than them, as well as a lot stronger.
He yawned and stretched. Probably be best to get out of here once they’d gone, before the neighbours started
stirring. He’d change his clothes whilst he was at it, and get something to eat.
He did a careful check before leaving, but couldn’t see any police or other watchers near the house. He gave a scornful sniff. It was as his friends said: the police relied on most people acting like meek bloody sheep. They didn’t have resources to follow up on everything.
But he had to get hold of some money, if he was to stay ahead of the game. He’d soon be needing some more stuff. And he’d have to find somewhere to exercise. When he was inducted into the group, it’d be a lot easier, but until then he had to fend for himself. Those were the rules. All they’d do for the first few months was sell him the stuff.
Dan went to the allotment as usual on Sunday morning, looking forward to his lesson on cake making later in the day. He could probably have found instructions for doing it in Peggy’s cookery books, but in practical matters, being shown was often more useful.
Same with gardening. Books didn’t give you a
feel
for it, or tell you the local soil conditions, weren’t able to look up at the sky and figure out what the weather was going to be like.
If the cake he’d tasted at Winifred’s last time was anything to go by, she was a top cook.
Besides, this was a way of cementing a new friendship. At his age, new friends were few and far between, and mostly women, because men died sooner. Thank goodness he’d never smoked. The friends who’d smoked had died first, it seemed to him.
Humming under his breath, he checked his trays of
seedlings in the little lean-to greenhouse he’d built from scrap wood and old windows bought cheaply from the salvage yard. He was pleased to see several more seedlings standing up and testing the world around them by opening two little leaves on a delicate stalk. Soon he’d be starting his first plantings, pricking them out. He loved doing that. There was so much promise in a row of young plants. They stood up so bravely out in the big world and responded so well to a little care.
Still humming, he began to potter around, bending over to clear up some wind-blown debris. From that position he noticed a burly young fellow coming out of Martin’s hut and something about him looked menacing. Dan stayed where he was, not even standing up. Still crouching, he moved closer to his hut, not liking the looks of the fellow at all.
Some instinct made him slip inside. He’d have locked the door, only it had no locks on the inside. He’d never even considered that before, but now it seemed a stupid omission.
He continued to peer out of the window and to his horror, saw the young fellow trampling on some seedlings Martin had just set out, doing it deliberately. Dan’s heart began to pound and he took out his mobile phone. Was he in enough danger to ring the police? He switched it on, in case.
The young vandal wandered over to another of the makeshift huts and kicked the door in, vanishing inside for a moment or two, then coming out, clenched fists hanging by his side, looking annoyed. Hadn’t found anything valuable, probably.
He kicked again, smashing the flimsy wooden door panels and then chucking a stone through the little window.
That settled it. Dan dialled 999 and said in a voice breathless with fear, ‘There’s a young guy kicking in the hut doors and trampling plants at the Grove Allotments. I think he’s looking for things to steal. I’m alone in my hut and I’m frightened. I’m an old chap. I can’t defend myself against a brute like that.’
There were some fuzzy crackling sounds then a voice said, ‘Car on its way.’
‘Thank you.’
But would it come fast enough?
He tried to jam the chair under the latch, but the chair back wasn’t high enough. They might do that sort of thing in novels, but it didn’t work in real life. He thought of the padlock, hanging uselessly on the outside, but didn’t dare open the door to get it, in case he drew attention to himself. If he survived this, he’d fit good strong bolts inside.
Keeping out of direct sight – he hoped – he continued to watch through the little window.
Oh, no! The fellow was coming this way now.
Janey woke on Sunday morning feeling apprehensive. For a moment she couldn’t think why, then she remembered Gary turning up yesterday, the way he’d grabbed the pram and threatened her baby. He hadn’t really looked at Millie, even though she was his child.
But at least she’d given Kieran the letter now. If anything happened to her, they’d know who’d done it. And the letter meant she’d have something to threaten Gary with.
She hesitated about going to church, then got angry.
Why should she stop doing the things she wanted to? She’d be careful, very careful, but she wasn’t going to hide in her flat all the time.
She got ready, dressing as smartly as she could, put Millie in the playpen and pushed the buggy out on to the landing, moving it carefully down the stairs. It was irritating the way she had to juggle Millie and the buggy to get them both down safely.
As often happened, Kieran’s door opened before she reached the bottom and he smiled at her. ‘Need some help?’
‘No, thanks. I’ve just got to fetch Millie down then we’re off to church.’
‘I’d offer to walk with you, but I’d slow you down.’
‘That’s all right. There’ll be plenty of people around at this hour.’
‘I’ll come and watch you walk down the street, and if you give me a ring when you’re nearly back, I’ll come out and make sure you get home safely.’
Tears filled her eyes as she looked at him. ‘You are
so
kind, Kieran. I can’t tell you how grateful I am.’
He went a bit red. ‘People have helped me a lot this past year. When you’re more settled, perhaps you can help someone else in your turn.’
‘I will. You know, you’re walking a lot better than when I first moved in.’
He beamed at her. ‘Do you really think so?’
She nodded, happy to have pleased him. But it was true: he was limping less – and smiling a lot more, too.
When she got down to High Street, she turned and waved to him, then set off for church. There were enough people around for her to feel safe.
This time she knew to take Millie to the crèche and when she sat on one of the hard wooden chairs, waiting for the service to begin, a couple of people nearby said good morning to her, which made her feel welcome.
To her surprise, Al from college came in with a woman who didn’t look old enough to be his mother, but who looked so like a female version of him that she must be.
He nudged his mother and they came over to join Janey. After introductions, they sat down beside her.
‘I enjoy Louise’s sermons,’ his mother said. ‘She’s got her feet on the ground, unlike some.’
After the service, people stayed around chatting, and to Janey’s surprise, Al offered to get her a cup of coffee.
She looked in the direction of the side room. ‘I need to fetch Millie.’
‘The crèche doesn’t shut till an hour after the service,’ his mother said. ‘Louise thinks people should enjoy their outing and do some talking of their own, instead of leaving it all to her.’
Al grinned. ‘And she provides decent coffee too. It’s only 20p a cup, so I can afford to treat you.’