Authors: C.J. Pinard
CHAPTER 18
There’s
a saying that goes: “Never find your honey where you make your money.” It may
be cute and funny, but it’s actually a worthwhile cliché. Case in point:
Michael West, a very cute Lieutenant I agreed to go out with.
We had gone to dinner and a
movie on a particularly uneventful Saturday night – our first date. He was
charming, funny, and smelled really good. Not to mention he was
smokin
’ hot. He was about six-foot-two with sky blue eyes
and a dark brown buzz cut. From what little flesh I could see, he had a few
nice looking tattoos on his arms and something on his chest that peeked up
above his T-shirt. However, he did have the same macho attitude most of the men
in my industry had, but I was used to it. Work too long in prisons, and you
become hard-edged and untrusting. I couldn’t say I didn’t have some of those
qualities now too from having been employed in the industry for three years
now, but I liked to think I still kept a softer side when I needed it.
Michael had been very
courteous and gentlemanly on our date. It had been when he dropped me off at
home when things went askew. I let him walk me to my apartment door and made it
clear my sister and Aiden were there so there would be no coming inside. I
don’t care how hot he was, or how many months it had been since I’d had sex, no
way was I sleeping with a coworker on a first date anyway. It was bad enough
the whole prison complex was like one big Peyton Place as it was.
Michael leaned in to kiss
me and I accepted. He was a pretty good kisser but his hands became way too
exploratory too quickly so I broke the kiss and bid him goodnight. I guess he
wasn’t used to being told no, because he acted like he hadn’t heard me and
continued to kiss me, slithering his hand up my very tight tank top that was
hidden underneath the thin button-up shirt I had over it. I’ll admit it felt
good. His hands were warm and experienced and I wanted to let him continue, but
I resisted and gently pulled his hand out.
“Michael, I need to go,” I
said.
“Oh, come on, Cara. Let’s
go inside. Your kid’s asleep, right?” he whispered.
I shook my head. “That’s
not really the point. My sister is here and I need to talk to her before she
leaves.”
He was now kissing my
neck, talking in between kisses. “So call her tomorrow.”
This guy was starting to
piss me off. I yanked myself free of his muscled grip and looked up at him.
“Goodnight, Lieutenant West.”
I spun on my heel and
unlocked my door as he stood on my stoop in shock.
“Fine, whatever, you’re a
tease.”
I shook my head and slammed
the door to his retreating figure.
Yeah
work won’t be awkward at all now.
I let out a sigh.
***
I thanked the heavens
above that Lieutenant Michael West had been on the swing shift so I didn’t have
to see him for several months. I got a few looks from people a week or so after
the strange date, but thankfully I never heard of anyone spreading rumors about
me being a tease, a slut, easy, or anything. I did, however, get asked out a
few more times, mostly by men who weren’t my type or ones I knew were married.
Thankfully the caseworker in my unit had been working here for ten years and
knew everyone’s business, so I ran things by her and we’d get a good laugh at
all the newbies hitting on the fresh meat.
The weekend rolled around
and I was very bored. I still didn’t have any close friends yet and my sister
was busy. I missed Miranda. The weather had turned cold and Thanksgiving was on
its way. It had snowed twice and I had to learn how to drive in snow, it was
stressful, and I’d had a few close calls with skidding and such on my way to
work, so I looked outside and saw it was a clear, sunny day, but I knew it
would be very cold outside. I bundled up Aiden and decided to take him to the
mall to play on the indoor play structure while I read a book. This was something
I did a couple times a month to get Aiden out of the house and let him get some
sort of exercise since it was too cold outside.
We put on our coats and
gloves and I got into the car, looking at all the naked trees and the mountain
range to the west that was covered in a healthy layer of snow. Pikes Peak
looked beautiful covered in it, and I knew I would never get used to the
breathtaking views.
I arrived at the mall and
took Aiden’s shoes off so he could climb on the play structures. I pulled out my
Kindle but got easily distracted with people watching. I sucked in a breath
when a group of Army soldiers wearing their BDUs walked by. Melancholy over
Riley hit me hard and I tried to force my thoughts elsewhere but couldn’t.
There were four large bases in this town and military men were everywhere; it
was a constant reminder and I wondered when it would stop physically hurting to
think about him or be reminded of him. I had wondered on many occasions if I
still loved him or if I was just bored, or jealous of the new girl, or angry
that he had ended things… and I wondered if maybe I just felt as if I never got
any closure. Although I wasn’t sure how much more closure I could have gotten.
I couldn’t concentrate on
reading so I fished my cell phone from my purse and
surfed
the Internet a little when my phone rang and Miranda’s pretty face popped on
the screen.
“Hey,
girl!”
I answered.
“I’m getting married!” she
screamed into the phone.
I laughed.
“Seriously?”
“Yes! Are you coming out
for Thanksgiving to drop off Aiden?”
I nodded. “Yes, I was
going to spend a couple days and see everyone then come back here.”
“No!
Jace
has a month off between Thanksgiving and Christmas and we’re getting married then.
You have to be here for it. I need you to be my maid of honor!”
I was happy for her. I
guess her
casual
relationship had turned into
something serious and I knew the feeling. “Of course we’ll be there.”
“Oh and Aiden has to be my
ring bearer. He and
Ashlynn
are going to look so
cute!”
“Ring bearers and maids of
honor. Just how big is this thing? I thought you said if you got married again,
it would be low-key.”
“Oh
no, girl.
Jace
has never
been
married,
his parents are paying for almost
everything. They want a huge party. His mom and my mom are doing most of the
planning since
it’s
such last minute.”
“You’re not pregnant, are
you?” I asked skeptically.
She laughed. God, I missed
her laugh.
“
Noooo
way.
No
more kids for me.”
I shook my head because I
knew in true Miranda fashion, she would change her mind but I said nothing
about it. “Shoot me details over email and I’ll be sure Aiden and I are there.”
“Thanks,
girl.
I miss you. I hope you’re doing okay.”
I smiled. “I am, we’re
good, no worries.”
As usual, the words came
out of my mouth but I didn’t truly believe them. I just wanted to meet someone
and settle down but it seemed like every time I did, I kept picturing Riley,
and I wished I could just get over him. I never did Internet stalk him,
thinking it would just make matters worse.
***
The plane landed in San
Francisco and my mom met Aiden and me at the curb.
“Nana!”
Aiden yelled, running and jumping into my mom’s waiting arms. It warmed my
heart to see he remembered her so easily and she was also in tears.
She hugged me. “Guess
what?”
I pulled back and looked
at her. “What?”
“We’re moving back to
Colorado in the spring!”
I hugged her again. “Oh
I’m so happy! Have you told Katelyn yet?”
She shook her head. “Nope,
just found out today and I was so happy I could tell you in person!”
As I loaded my suitcase
into her trunk and strapped Aiden’s booster seat into the backseat of my mom’s
car, I felt so relieved. Over the past six months, I’d been questioning my move
to Colorado. Not whether I’d made a mistake, but if I should think about
staying temporarily and move on. I was now house shopping and there were quite
a few in my price range I could afford by myself and I had told myself if I
found something for us, I would stay and know I had made the right decision.
Now, knowing my mom and stepdad were moving back, I felt even more at peace,
knowing Colorado was where I should stay.
I missed things about
California, mostly the weather and the friends and extended family I had left
behind, but it was time to move forward with life. I was happy Miranda was
getting married, almost relieved, that she and
Ashlynn
had a constant in their lives, too, and I hoped
Jace
would be a good dad to
Ashlynn
, since she would need
one.
CHAPTER 19
Miranda’s
mother’s house was a beehive of activity. Miranda already had a dress for me to
wear and a little suit for Aiden. The wedding was to take place in her mother’s
massive backyard garden.
When we were all ready and
looking as good as we could, I grabbed Aiden’s hand and pulled the hem of my
sleek black bridesmaid dress up to try to avoid stepping on it with my strappy
black sandals and led him outdoors. The backyard was decorated so beautifully,
it took my breath away. She already had gorgeous honeysuckle bushes and birds
of paradise scattered throughout and a massive swimming pool with a fountain
was in the corner. I’d swam here many times but it was the chairs decorated so
ornately with bows, flowers, and chiffon ribbon, all facing a large flowered
arch that made me really smile. It was simply beautiful.
Jace
stood at the front, accompanied by two other men about his size, one was brown
skinned and he reminded me of Sammy Sosa. The other was blonde and looked like
Jace
and I figured it must be his brother,
Jory
.
Aiden and
Ashlynn
walked along the silky aisle runner which elicited
laughs and smiles from the small audience, then I walked behind our friend
Shayla
and stood in front, making sure
Ashlynn
and Aiden stood in front of us and stayed still. Miranda’s mother and my mom
and stepdad were near the front so I knew I could pass the kids off to them if
they became too antsy.
Miranda looked beautiful
in a simple fitted cream dress and was holding a bouquet of red and cream
roses. As she linked her arm through her father’s, I got a small tear in my
eye. I knew how much she adored her dad and I’m sure she was glad he was here
for her.
Jace’s
face lit up as she walked down the aisle and I cursed myself for ever doubting
him. I had made assumptions about him because of his being a minor league
baseball player – the way Miranda had jumped to conclusions about Riley being
in the military – but I could see the love he had in his eyes for Miranda and I
was so happy my friend had found the right guy. I hoped one day I would, too,
but I wasn’t holding my breath, as I had felt I had already met him and let him
slip through my fingers and into the arms of someone else. And I didn’t mean my
ex-husband, either.
***
The wedding had been
gorgeous, even for November, the weather held up beautifully, if not a bit
chilly, but it worked, thanks to the mild California climate.
I stayed in California for
four days, then my mom and I dropped Aiden off at my ex’s, where he was going
to stay until after the Thanksgiving holiday for a prearranged court visit. I
didn’t know what I was going to do without my little man for three whole weeks.
I got off the plane in
Colorado Springs and immediately felt the biting cold as I took the tunnel that
led back into the terminal. Taking the escalator down to the baggage claim, I
sighed as I saw a group of a dozen or so soldiers in full uniform headed into
the ISO office of the airport.
I adjusted my purse strap
and took a seat on a nearby bench and waited for the baggage carousel to
indicate the luggage was on its way. I seemed to be one of the first people
here from my flight and the airport didn’t seem that busy. However, it was a
small airport so it wasn’t like it would be half the busy mess the Denver
airport was. I loathed using DIA and avoided it whenever I could.
I was lost in my thoughts
when I could feel someone staring at me. From the corner of my eye, I saw a guy
wearing jeans and a charcoal grey hoodie sitting on a bench near another
baggage carousel. I couldn’t see his face, but I could tell he was looking at
me,
and it
creeped
me out a little
bit. I pulled out my phone and decided to distract myself and hoped he would
lose interest and stop looking at me. Every time I was in public and saw or
felt someone creepy looking at me, I always assumed it was an ex-inmate who
most likely recognized me, but couldn’t place where he or she knew me from.
Then when realization would dawn on them, they would quickly get out of my line
of sight and disappear, as I was a reminder of a darker time in their life.
After about five minutes,
the baggage carousel still had yet to beep the suitcases’ impending arrival.
And the creeper in the gray hoodie was still looking in my direction. I
wondered what type of person would keep a hoodie on over his head indoors like
this, and thought it was probably a teenager. Maybe he wasn’t staring at
me,
maybe he was looking past me at something else. I turned
my head to look but saw nothing even remotely interesting for him to stare at.
As I glanced back over at him, I could see he was wringing his hands together
and he almost seemed to be… nervous.
Which in turn made me
nervous.
The guy was starting to piss me off now, and I contemplated
finding an airport security guard for help, but dismissed it. As soon as my
luggage arrived, I’d just leave and make sure he wouldn’t follow me.
Finally! The carousel
began to light up. I stood and adjusted my purse strap again, as it began to
slide down my leather jacket. I had my jeans tucked into black riding boots and
I fished my
Isotoner
gloves from my purse in
preparation for leaving. Thankfully, my little pink suitcase was one of the
first to arrive, so I yanked it off and headed for the door, preparing for the
blast of cold that would inevitably hit me.
I was one step from
activating the electric doors with my steps when I heard my name.
“Cara.”
I froze. I knew that
voice. I felt dizzy and swallowed hard, turning around slowly, only to face
Gray Hoodie, only now I could see his face. As he lowered the hoodie with both
hands, I felt warm tears fill my eyes and slide down my cheeks. It was Riley.
It was my Riley, but it didn’t look like him.
Not exactly.
He took a tentative step
towards me and managed a smile. The scarring on the left side of his face made
his smile looked
forced
– almost painful – and I
stared, most likely with my mouth open, and almost dropped my suitcase. Oh, my
God.
Riley, my poor Riley.