Out of Sight Out of Mind (29 page)

One year later

Madison kissed the downy head resting against her chest, and smiled. Amanda Jayne gave a contented gurgle, reaching for Madison’s hand, curving tiny pink fingers over her mother’s thumb. Madison made approving noises and tickled a small stomach.

‘Uh-oh.’ Both their heads went up as they heard a noise in the hall. ‘Sounds like that’s the post. Letters for Mummy.’

Tucking her daughter more securely on to her hip, Madison wandered out to pick them up. It was a fine day, so they would be going to the park later. Madison would tell Amanda Jayne all about the ducks on the pond and the boys playing football and the baby would keep dark blue eyes fixed on her, exactly as if she understood. Or she might just go to sleep.

Madison scooped up the letters. A bill, a holiday brochure, a postcard from Los Angeles. She turned it over and read the message from Jonathan. Ashley was settling into his new job. Jonathan was perfecting his surfing technique and enjoying being a kept man during Ashley’s period of secondment and his sabbatical from the lab. The sun shone every day. When was she going to visit them and bring their goddaughter?

‘You want to go, poppet?’ She jiggled the baby on her hip. ‘In a big airplane? To see Uncle Jonathan and Uncle Ash?’

Amanda Jane blew a bubble.

Madison turned the last envelope over. Her heartbeat had kicked up a little at the sight of the padded bag. She unsealed the flap and tipped the contents out. It was there. After so long, the signal lay in the palm of her hand. It looked like an expensive piece of marketing, an extravagantly embossed invitation to visit the local car showroom to try out the latest models in stock. The key, attached to the card –
unlock your future driving pleasure
– was impressively realistic.

Madison stared down at it, her heartbeat sounding in her ears. She could barely breathe. Elation, joy, heart-wrenching longing – and sudden panic. She grasped the corner of the hall table, fighting her emotions.
Normal, everything has to be
normal.
In case someone is still listening.
She’d spent a year living quietly, working methodically, dressing plainly – subdued and passive. Flying under the radar. Waiting for this moment.

Madison leant against the table, eyes closed. The baby, gripped a little too tightly in her arm, began to whimper.

‘I’m sorry, poppet, was Mummy holding on too tight? Silly Mummy.’ She lifted the child to her shoulder and nuzzled her cheek, hand folded over the key. ‘It’s a lovely day – how would you like to go for a ride on a train?’

She packed the bag with care, putting in the essentials, then stood back to examine it. Only the sort of thing a nervous new mother might put together for a day out with her baby. Her heart was still pounding. She forced herself to move slowly and carefully as she emptied the bag again, tucking in the large stuffed mouse, and below it, the tissue-wrapped wisps of scarlet silk. Smiling, she discarded a few of the larger items from the original pile, loaded the rest of the contents back in, and closed the zip. Then she fitted Amanda Jayne into her carrying sling and picked up the bag.

Madison hesitated on the edge of the platform, stopping at the last minute to let the doors of the Tube train close, without getting on. Alone on the platform she looked up at the signs, whispered a soft reassurance to her daughter, and headed for the southbound line.

She’d rehearsed it in small, unconnected bursts – the rapid succession of buses, taxis and tubes that would obscure her trail, the small but significant changes to their appearance in the mother-and-baby room of a large department store, the last stop at the coffee shop where the envelope containing their new identities, that had been waiting safely under the counter for weeks, was passed over, so casually, with a cup of espresso. Madison grimaced as she sat down to drink it. She hardly needed the caffeine. Her nerves were at jumping point, her chest tight with tension. It was a miracle that Amanda Jayne was dozing peacefully in her brand new baby sling. Her new
blue
baby sling.

Madison looked down at her watch. Two hours and forty minutes since she left the flat. She was almost sure she hadn’t been followed, but there was one way to find out. Closing her eyes she sent a probe out into the crowded café, smiling when it turned up empty. Craig was an excellent planner and teacher and she couldn’t have done it without his help, especially in the matter of obtaining their new identities. He was a good man, with an enduring sense of responsibility to a dead friend and colleague. She was deeply grateful, and glad to be finally ending that responsibility. Very soon she would be off Craig’s hands. Then, in a few days, but from a different starting point, she would follow the route overseas that Jay had taken when he’d first disappeared, and had travelled again a year ago. A route to the other side of the world.

It had worked then. She sent up a silent prayer that it would work now. Just one more time. Then they would be free.

Her hand closed on the strap of her bag as the stab of longing went through her, iced with fear. Nothing could go wrong. Not now. She’d moved like a ghost in her own life for a year – fading into the background, colourless, causing no ripples. No suspicion.

Shaking off the cold breath of trepidation down her spine she stood, gathering her things. It was time.

The express train from Paddington wasn’t crowded. Madison sat in the quiet carriage trying to read, wondering if she was being observed by a CCTV camera. There was nothing to see. She didn’t
feel
as if she was being watched. She crossed her fingers, and hoped. Craig had told her how to minimise the risk, if there were any cameras, but it was impossible to completely avoid all chance of surveillance. Amanda Jayne snoozed in her lap, unconcerned. They spent the night at a hotel near Cardiff station. The second train was smaller and slower, pottering through the countryside, stopping at small villages and halts, with unfamiliar names. Madison fed and changed her daughter and watched the scenery.

The SUV was parked a short distance from the cottage, nose towards the track. Madison breathed a sigh of relief. There had been a moment of panic when she alighted at the station and a tide of fear had inexplicably washed over her. She’d come to a dead stop on the platform, limbs turning to ice, before realisation dawned. Not her, but a woman walking just ahead of her, journeying back from hospital and a terminal prognosis. Madison sent out what comfort she could, and saw the woman’s step lighten a fraction.

Hugging Amanda Jayne, she’d hurried to the bus stop.

Madison took a deep gulp of sea air. Gulls were circling overhead. From below she could hear the sound of the waves. She took the key from the envelope out of her pocket and aimed it at the lock, face lighting up as the vehicle responded. There were tickets and maps in the glove compartment. Madison leafed through them, before tackling the baby carrier that she’d bought in Cardiff. Amanda Jayne, safe on the back seat, in a nest made from a rug, looked on, with what might have been a puzzled expression, as her mother dealt efficiently with the fastenings and fittings for the car seat.

‘It’s a good thing I thought of a seat for you,’ Madison told her. ‘You know your daddy is going to flip when he sees you.’

She’d made Craig swear that he wouldn’t tell. She’d been too afraid that Jay would try to come back. She grinned at her daughter. ‘I’m quite good at keeping secrets. And you’re the biggest secret of all. The most wonderful secret,’ she assured her daughter, as she lifted her off the back seat.

The ferry from Fishguard sailed on dark water, into a moonless night. By morning they were docking in Ireland. Madison drove the vehicle carefully down the ramp and threaded her way through the dock buildings, heading west. They stopped for lunch in a small town, then meandered on, always moving westwards, along unfrequented roads.

She missed the turning twice, and had to double back. When she finally made it, she understood. She’d been expecting a disused aerodrome. It was actually just a flat field, with a tumble of derelict barns at one end. The small plane waiting in the lee of the largest one was sturdy and freshly painted. The pilot showed no surprise at having a baby unexpectedly added to his unofficial passenger list, simply directing them to the best place to sit in the small hold, amongst towering piles of cardboard boxes.

‘Is his dad going to get a shock when he sees him?’ he asked, grinning, as he showed her how to fasten the seat belts.

‘Um … yes. You could say that.’ Madison tilted her head, frowning. ‘Do you know … er … Dad?’

The pilot put his finger to his lips. ‘No names, no pack drill.’ His eyes glittered with amusement. ‘Make yourselves comfortable and hang on tight. Take off might be a bit bumpy.’

Madison stood in the stern, watching the silver line of the ship’s wake, trailing out behind them. Around her the darkness of the ocean melded into the darkness of the sky – black-on-black. On the port side distant lights showed the presence of another vessel, but otherwise they were alone on the inky sea. She leaned on the rail, savouring the warm breeze in her face. When she tipped her head back, the stars were huge and bright above her. Engines beat rhythmically under her feet as the small cargo vessel ploughed onwards, into the night. Everything she’d ever known was thousands of miles behind her. In front of her … a new life. She shivered at the leap her heart gave. It was time.

Closing her hands on the smooth wood of the rail, staring down into the water, she turned her thoughts inwards.

Waves. Gulls. A beach. A picture forming – colours etched on glass. The beach below the cottage, that last day. The hardness of rock at her back. The softness of sand under her fingers …

Their plans were made. Now Jay was staring out to sea.

‘Penny for them?’

He turned towards her, shaking his head slowly. ‘It’s just … here, today … knowing that this will be the end,’ he said quietly. ‘Once we’ve done what we have to do.’

Madison nodded. ‘And you’re taking your farewell,’ she confirmed softly. ‘Prospero, promising to drown his books?’

Jay tilted his head, to slant a glance up at her. ‘I hadn’t thought … but I suppose it’s apt – the magician renouncing his power, once he’s used it for the last time.’ He reached out to take her hand. The smile was as sad as the fingers were warm. ‘When this is over, if we make it that far,’ he gave a small, wry grimace, ‘we can never attempt anything like that again. It has to be buried, and stay buried.’

Madison let out a measured sigh. ‘Was it hard, last time – giving up your work?’

‘Yes. No – I was so full of self-disgust, hate – guilt. Especially guilt. It felt like a suitable penance. I got by – but I was only living half a life.’

‘You know there
is
more to you than just the ability to read minds.’

‘I hope so. If we survive we’ll find out.’ He raised her hand to his lips. ‘If we do, will you marry me?’

Madison swallowed over her stuttering heart. ‘Well, I didn’t see that one coming.’ Suddenly she laughed, leaning closer to rest her forehead against his cheek. ‘If we survive – and what are the odds – that would be a whole different world.’ She twined their fingers together, interlocking. ‘If we get through this, ask me again. Two halves together might just make a whole.’

Madison came back to the present slowly, as the images in her mind faded. She was standing on deck again, looking out to sea and preparing, as far as possible, to consign her own powers to the deep. Idly she followed the star-lit wake of the ship. Left unattended, would the power dwindle to a shadow of itself? To small, personal manifestations, like this ability to make living, breathing mental pictures of the past, that she had been refining for the last twelve months? Would her power be used in the future only to record small hopes and joys – milestones of the baby now asleep in the cabin behind her, lulled by the throb of the engines?

There are worst things that can happen. Much worse.

Involuntarily she shuddered – dragging her mind away from a derelict warehouse and the smell of burning. Pictures of the past had consoled her over the long, empty months of waiting. If she never read another mind – what then?

Emotions swirled around her in the sultry night – poignancy, regret and – a measure of relief. She smiled. It wouldn’t be simple to turn her back, but it would grow easier, with time.

There were other ways to use the power of the mind. Standing straight, she leaned against the rail. Summoning her concentration, she flung her energy out into the darkness, letting it travel and build. Create. Eyes closed, she focused on the empty air beside her. Slowly, painstakingly, the sensation of a form grew beside her. Joy bubbled in her chest. They were so much closer now, as the ship sped on into the night.
Now
it was possible.
Now
she could
feel
him, like a warm breath on her skin.

When at last she opened her eyes golden trails of light popped and fizzed in a form that was almost real. Laughing, she turned fully to face him, putting out her hand as his came up in response ‘The answer is yes, and I love you,’ she whispered.

‘… love you.’ It might have been the echo of her own voice as the trails glowed bright, then faded into the dark. The whole thing might just have been a trick of the light.

‘Not long now, my love. Not long,’ she promised the night and the stars, before turning back to her sleeping child.

The sun was coming up over the valley. The early morning air was cool. Madison shivered slightly as she studied the vivid green of the vegetation in the field at the base of the mountain. They’d spent last night at a small B and B in the nearest town. Amanda Jayne had been fractious and grisly and Madison had been glad to stop and rest before the final stage of the journey. She hadn’t wanted to arrive late at night, tired and travel stained, with a wailing baby
. We
girls have to have some pride.

And she’d needed that time. To … gather herself. New world, new life.