Opposite Sides (40 page)

“
You have
something to tell me,” Hans began. “And I have an idea it concerns
Andrea. Am I correct in this?”

Anne looked out of the
window for a while. It was an awkward moment for her and Hans could
feel the emotion but he remained silent until Anne was ready to
speak.

“
As you know,
Hans, Nanny Goodman has been looking after both Andrea and our
little Andrew.” Anne audibly swallowed and Hans knew she was upset.
He found it most unusual for Anne who always had managed to control
her emotions and who always had managed to come up with a solution
which suited everyone.

She should be
in the embassy
, Hans thought.
Not the man who had recently been appointed. Too
close to the Party, like Renard
.

He thought Anne looked
paler than last time. Something was worrying her and he could sense
that she wanted to talk.

“
It is
Nanny,” she said. “Poor Nanny’s had a stroke. Doctor Tilly told us
that she’s no longer capable of looking after the children any
more.” Anne was distracted by Andrew who until now had been playing
with his bricks and toys on the bay window seat. “Come here,
Andrew. There.” She gently removed his fingers from his mouth and
wiped them with a hand towel. “Off you go. See how high you can
build the tower.” She straightened and took a deep breath. “We have
had to let Nanny go and she is now living with a sister somewhere
in Kent. Besides, Gerald’s got a position with a commercial
aeroplane company so we would have had to let Nanny go in any
case.That’s why we have to move.”

“
That is good
news, Anne. Not about Nanny but about Gerald. He must be
pleased.”

“
Oh, he is.
Over the moon but . . .”

“
But
what?”

Anne brushed her hands
across her hair and tucked it behind her ears. Her tiny earrings
swayed back and forth at having been so rudely
disturbed.

“
Gerald’s new
position is well north of here and we cannot take Andrea with us.
The authorities have looked on us as foster parents but now that
conditions are about to change, we have to find another way. She
has just started school and it would be good for her stay around
here.”

“
How long
have we got before you go?” he asked. He twisted his little finger
as he tried to think of a way out of the problem. If the welfare
took Andrea away, he may never see or hear of her again.

“
Several
weeks,” Anne answered. “We have not told Andrea yet. I am so sorry,
Hans.”

“
Don’t be,
Anne. You and Gerald have been wonderful and I thank you for
everything you have done. I am pleased for Gerald. A pilot at last.
It’s what he’s always wanted.” Hans smiled but it was not the
happy, warm smile he was used to sharing with these two wonderful
friends.

“
Yes, he may
get to fly you over the Channel, yet, if . . .” Anne laughed a
little but it was not the light, infectious laugh that Anne was
known for. There was something else that was bothering her. Hans
could tell that by the way she had drawn back away from
him.

“
If what,
Anne?”

“
If the
international situation does not get worse.”

“
Why should
it? The Olympics are coming soon and that should show how well we
are all getting along with each other.”

“
Maybe.” She
did not sound convincing. “I hope it doesn’t mean another war.” She
shook her head as if shaking out the thoughts. “Well, before that,
we have to think about Andrea and what we can do.”

Hans bit his lip and
tasted blood. He dabbed the cut with the corner of his handkerchief
and checked the situation. There was only a tiny red dot there so
nothing to worry about.

“
Arrangements
will have to be made,” he said. “I definitely don’t want her going
into an institution. I can’t have her with me in London and I have
no authority to take her out of England. The authorities would be
down on me like a ton a of bricks. Even though she’s my child, she
isn’t mine, if you see what I mean.”

The phone bell rang. Anne
walked over and took the earpiece off the hook. Hans took the time
to look around the room. It was quite dark inside even though there
were two lights switched on. The English cottages had such tiny,
tiny windows, only large enough to see a tiny part of the garden
outside or let just one hour’s sunshine creep in between the panes.
Nice, though and very homely.

Anne put the earpiece
back and walked back over to Hans. Hans looked serious, and after a
while, spoke out in frustration,

“
I don’t know
what I’m going to do about it!” And Anne looked at him this time in
such a strange way, that he knew she was keeping something else
from him. It could only have been as a result of the phone call and
he was eager to know what it was. “Well, Anne? What are you not
telling me?”

“
Wait a
minute!” She held her palm up facing him. “Don’t be so impatient,
Hans.”

“
Out with
it!”

Anne laughed, this time
the real laugh that he remembered from their school
days.

“
You’re not
going to believe it, but honestly, it’s true.”

“
Anne!” His
voice rose several tones higher.

“
Oh, all
right. I was supposed to wait until Gerald’s back. No. I’ll only
say that Miss Turner wishes to speak with you about the matter.
She’s retired now and lives in town.”

“
Yes, I know.
I was told.”

“
That was her
on the telephone. She’s come up with an idea. I have written down
her new address.” Anne handed over a small card. “Don’t worry about
trying to find it, I’ll drive you over this afternoon. I have to go
that way, anyway. Got to pick something up for Gerald. Spot of
business to do in town. Mummy will look after Andrew until I get
back. And do not worry about Andrea. She won’t be home until almost
four.”

As the afternoon drew
closer, Hans got to thinking how strange it would be visiting the
Matron again and even stranger this time not going up to the big
school house and being welcomed by one of Miss Turner’s maids. Anne
had explained to him earlier in the day that since Miss Turner’s
retirement, she had taken possession of a of a small house on the
other side of town so that she could be nearer the shops. She also
told him that although technically Jan was still living with her
aunt, she did not stay there every day but spent at least half the
week away. Hans did not bother to ask why.

He got Anne to drop him
off where Miss Turner’s road joined the main road and walked up
Rosamand Avenue until he came to the gate of number 238.

He felt a wave of
apprehension wash through his body and he stood, hand on the top of
the gate but daring himself to lift the latch. Memories of his
first day at the school overwhelmed his mind. This time the gravel
pathway which curved to the front door passed across a small pebble
garden, ending at the small porch which was just sufficient to
encase the front door with its narrow letter slit.

The house, a two-storey,
grey-shingled roof which rose steeply up to a chunky ridge and
several orange garden pot black sooted chimneys, wore an exterior
of chipped grey, black and white flint walls. Dark red-brown
brickwork framed each small window with their black wrought-iron
window catches. He could not see inside as the small square pane
bent the light away so that each window was dark and secure. Hans
noticed a plant pot to the right of the front door sporting a
splurge of draped colour and nestling close was a cheeky gnome with
a green waistcoat and bright red pointed hat.

How unlike
the large house in the school ground
, he
thought. He wondered how he would be received this time; would the
elderly lady receive him with the same coolness she had done in the
past?

He reached up, rang the
large brass bell and waited. He could hear someone coming down the
hall. He thought he could hear three footfalls. As the steps got
nearer, he realised one made a similar sound to the crutches Jan
had once had to use. He heard the fumbling I of fingers as someone
unlocked the front door.

“
Resmel!”
exclaimed the voice he thought knew so well. Only this time it was
different; friendlier and far less commanding. “Nice of you to
come. It’s been some time. Do come in.”

He noticed she used a
stick when walking. She led him into a small room, unfamiliar yet
familiar: the room had a Miss Turner feel to it, quiet and
retiring. He recognised several small pieces of furniture from the
large house and then he noticed the dreaded picture was on the
wall. Only this time, he said nothing and pretended it wasn’t
there.

She invited him to sit.
He sat on one of the newer soft upholstered armchairs which had
been placed conveniently beside the fireplace. He blurted out that
Anne had told him she wished to speak with him.

“
. . .
concerning Andrea,” he finished.

It had been some time
since he last saw her. She had grown old. Her hair was quite silver
white around her face and as she sat down, he noticed how stiff her
hips and knees had become. She leaned her shoulders back against
the lace cloth which had been placed over the top part of her chair
but kept her back straight so that she looked at him through the
bottom of her glasses. Hans expected the small lace cloth to slide
down the chair back but it didn’t. It remained fixed in perfection,
exactly the same distance from the back rest corners as the day it
was put there. Hans waited patiently as Miss Turner leaned her
walking stick against the padded armrest of her chair.

“
Yes, Andrea.
Our little Andrea,” she said, repeating the child’s name with
satisfaction. “I do think your treatment of the child has a lot to
be desired. Fancy going off and leaving her, especially as everyone
tried so hard to persuade the authorities to let you rear her.
Still, I expect you had your reasons.” She paused and drew in a
breath. He could hear the air whistling down into her lungs as her
chest rose and fell in slow rhythm. “Maybe, you had no other
choice. Poor little child, losing her mother like that. And her
grandfather not wanting to have anything to do with her. He has
never forgiven Caroline and never speaks of her but such behaviour
is hurtful to the children who have been born into this situation.
They are the innocent ones yet they are made to suffer and Andrea
is still a Grace by birth, you know.” Hans nodded in agreement but
made no effort to comment. Miss Turner went a little paler than
normal, even under the layers of powder she used these days to try
and conceal some of her facial blemishes. Hans thought her face had
the appearance of being more like tissue paper than skin but behind
those spectacles, her eyes still bore into him with the dignity of
authority. She looked him straight in the eye and most earnestly at
that. “Have you come to make one last effort to get custody of the
child? Is that why you’ve come back to England?”

She held herself stiff
and upright as she waited for him to reply. It took a while as he
had to gather his thoughts together for he had to be careful with
what he said. Besides, the situation with Andrea had not
changed.

“
I still
don’t have any authority to take her. Nothing was signed. As far as
the authorities are concerned, she’s an orphan. It was only because
of Anne that Andrea was kept out of an institution. I may be her
father but I have no more rights than if I were someone from
another planet.”

A look of shock and
disbelief crossed Miss Turner’s face. Hans knew at this instance
that the woman had no knowledge of their discretion. The Grace
family had kept Caroline’s involvement with him firmly closeted
away.

“
I was under
the impression that you and Caroline had married.” Miss Turner’s
voice almost rose to a shrill squeak. Her breasts rose and fell in
several great heavings and she placed her trembling hand between
them as she tried to calm herself. The realisation had come as a
shock and Hans could see that most clearly. “Now, I know you
weren’t,” she continued as the pitch of her voice drifted up and
down. “Oh, dear! What a problem. What a problem! It is worse than I
feared. And, that poor child!” She wrung her hands as if by doing
so, she could squash the problem away. Hans sat in silence as
slowly the elderly woman began to regain her composure. “So, what
brings you here?” she asked. Her voice was still a little squeaky
and somewhat shaky. “I had been told you were living in
Germany.”

“
I was. I’m
here on business.”

“
Business?
For your uncle?” Her eyes narrowed and her head shook slightly as
she sought an answer.

“
No,
government business.” The answer was flat and without a hint of
emotion.

He could see she was
weighing up whether to press him further for information. He leaned
forward and looked her full in the face. It was an uncomfortable
minute and Hans was relieved when Miss Turner made the decision to
move on with her own agenda.

“
Oh dear.
Well, it is obvious you cannot have the child with you. It is also
obvious that someone must be prepared to take the responsibility
for her or she will most definitely be put in an orphanage.” She
adjusted her spectacles and lifted her head which signified a
decision had been reached. How many times had he seen that look
before? He had lost count but it was the same defiant look that she
gave just before an announcement was made during one of the school
assemblies. “I think she should come and stay with me,” she said
resolutely. “Yes. I have all the time in the world and this house
could do with some life in it.”