Read One To Watch Online

Authors: Kate Stayman-London

One To Watch (23 page)

Bea was a senior in high school when her oldest brother, Jon, got engaged. Carol was his high school sweetheart; she followed him and his football scholarship to Kent State. Bea remembered the Thanksgiving when they told the family they were getting married—the whole group exploded into shouts and hugs and Bob dug a dusty bottle of whiskey out of a very tall cabinet and everyone did celebratory shots, even Bea.

Tim’s college girlfriend, Tina, was there, and Bea saw her eyes flash with envy while Carol and Jon posed for pictures, Carol laughing and showing off her ring. Bea hoped her own jealousy was better concealed. Seeing Jon and Carol together, their blinding smiles, the way they held hands under the table during dinner, made Bea so heartsick it caused her physical pain. She wanted that feeling so profoundly, and was nearly equally certain she’d never have it. Less than a year later, Tim and Tina were engaged too. If Carol ever thought that Tina was deliberately trying to steal her thunder (as Bea certainly did), she was too gracious to say so. Bea was a bridesmaid in both weddings, navy satin and peach chiffon, a cacophony of unflattering cuts and unforgiving fabrics that caused Bea to vow never to have bridesmaids of her own.

For years at Easter and Thanksgiving and Christmas, Bea and her youngest brother, Duncan, were a team, rolling their eyes at the familial antics of their older siblings and their wives—and, soon after, babies.

“Truly kill me if that’s ever my life,” Duncan whispered during an unbearably loud Easter brunch that featured the colicky screams of one infant, the biblical spit-up of another, and the full-tilt meltdown of a toddler.

“Same,” Bea agreed, deeply thankful to have at least one ally at family gatherings where she increasingly felt like a stranger.

In their mid-twenties, though, Duncan met Julia—another designer at the firm in Columbus where they both worked. The first time Bea met her, she knew it was all over. With Julia’s long brown hair and cat-eye glasses and red lipstick, she was so funny and smart and effortlessly cool, and Duncan had changed so much—where before he was detached and sardonic, now he was alert and attentive.

Duncan and Julia got married three years later, and they had their first baby in December; Bea met their newborn daughter this past Christmas, the first family gathering where all three of her brothers had children.

That Christmas morning, fewer than three months ago, while everyone gathered in pajamas to open presents, Bea had closed her eyes and let herself imagine Ray beside her, gently rubbing her back as the assorted kids ran around in total mayhem. She traveled back in time and superimposed him into every family memory: Ray laughing at her terrible dresses at Jon’s and Tim’s weddings, murmuring in her ear that he couldn’t wait to rip them off her; Ray holding her and gently swaying during Duncan and Julia’s first dance; a teenage Ray, five years younger than she’d ever known him, squeezing her hand while Jon and Carol posed for happy photos, saying,
Don’t worry, Bea. Someday, that’ll be us.

It was the worst Christmas Bea could remember.

And now, twelve weeks later, never having brought a boyfriend home in her life, Bea was on a plane to Columbus accompanied by ten men, a mobile production crew, a literal truckload of gear, and, soon enough, the prying eyes of several million Americans.

She wasn’t worried about her family being tough on her suitors—frankly, she’d probably find it satisfying if they were. But if her mother actually liked any of these guys, Bea would never hear the end of it. “Why couldn’t you make things work with that nice Frenchman? Or what about that professor? He was so charming, so smart!”

Yes, Mom, I was unbelievably charmed when the thought of kissing me so disgusted him that he physically jerked away from me. What a long and happy life we’ll have together.

It still stung to think of Asher at the museum, how stupidly caught up in the moment she’d been, how much she’d believed that he was legitimately interested in her, and vice versa. He was probably trying to convince himself he was evolved enough to be attracted to a fat woman, but when the moment arrived, he couldn’t actually bring himself to kiss her. Bea had met this type plenty of times, sat through any number of Tinder dates with some guy who was obviously mentally weighing how badly he wanted to get laid (this type of man assumed, just as Marco had, that a woman who looked like Bea would say yes and be grateful for any sex they offered). These dates always ended the same way: a strained expression, a stilted handshake or hug or peck on the cheek, an immovable sense on Bea’s part that what
she
felt hadn’t mattered at all.

Except,
an annoying little voice contradicted, when she danced with Asher, it certainly didn’t seem like he was brushing her off. The way he wrapped his arms around her, pulled her close—he was reveling in her body, not repulsed by it. But maybe that was just wishful thinking. Or maybe he’d cut the night short for some other reason. She didn’t want to know. She agreed to keep him around for another week at Lauren’s insistence, but on one condition: that he stay the hell away from her. Bea couldn’t imagine that would be a problem. He’d made it clear that that was what he wanted.

TRANSCRIPT OF PRODUCER INTERVIEW WITH BEA’S MOTHER AND STEPFATHER
Conducted prior to cast arrival

Producer:
What was Bea like as a kid?

Sue:
Oh, Bea was a
dream
of a child! So serious, so focused on her books, from the time she was a toddler, isn’t that right, Bob? She didn’t mind at all that she had so few friends; she was always really committed to her studies.

Sue:
Well, you know how girls are when they’re young, so cliquish. Bea was terribly shy, so she had a hard time making impressions on the other children. By the time she made it to high school, I think she was just more comfortable on her own. I always said that Bea was a late bloomer, that she’d find herself when she went off to college. Didn’t I always say that, Bob? And that is exactly what happened.

Producer:
What about boyfriends? Did Bea have a high school sweetheart?

Sue:
Oh no, the boys always brought their girlfriends around the house, but Beatrice never brought home any boys, She’s always been very private—we even thought for a while she might be gay, didn’t we, Bob? Remember, when she joined the theater crew and wore all that black? We thought we might have a lesbian on our hands, which would have been fine, we just wanted her to feel
supported,
that was always the main thing!

Bob:
The theater crew wears black so they can move things around onstage without the audience seeing.

Sue:
That’s true, it’s very practical—and black can be very slimming. You know, we didn’t have many options for Bea’s clothes while she was growing up. With her size and our budget, we mostly shopped at Target. When she was younger, she would wear the most darling things, flowery dresses and the like, but then in high school she just wanted to wear black. These baggy T-shirts—not flattering.

Bob:
You got the sense she didn’t want to draw attention.

Producer:
Why do you think that was?

Bob:
The kids here never bullied Bea—not overtly. Sue and I are both teachers at the elementary school, so we could keep an eye on her when she was there. As she got older, the other kids started to leave her out, not invite her to parties, that sort of thing. The longer that went on, the more she saw it as a kind of safety. If the other kids just didn’t pay her any mind, that meant they weren’t being cruel, either. But being ignored is its own kind of hurtful.

Producer:
When did you notice a change in Bea? In her personality, her appearance?

Bob:
After Paris.

Sue:
Paris, that’s right. She went abroad for her junior year, and when she came home, she was a changed person. She wore the strangest clothes, she had this one velvet cape she never took off—it was like she was a character in
Batman
! None of us knew what to make of it, but it made her so happy, and she was so much louder than she’d ever been. It was a real joy—it felt like we were meeting our daughter all over again.

Producer:
Are you surprised she’s starring on a TV show, given how shy she used to be?

Sue:
We were certainly surprised when she told us—she’d never expressed interest in doing anything like this!

Bob:
But it makes sense. She has her videos she does on Instagram, and all her fans who love her so much.

Producer:
Do you watch her videos?

Bob:
We both do, we watch every single one. In an emergency, I think I could do a very competent French tuck.

Producer:
What kind of man would you like to see Bea end up with?

Sue:
Someone who wants children!

Producer:
You’re ready for some grandkids, huh?

Bob:
We have six, we see them every Sunday.

Sue:
But it’s different with Bea. She’s my only daughter, and she’s so far away—oh, I would just love for her to have a baby and come home a little more. And a wedding! With all her style, wouldn’t that be a treat? Bob, we could do it at the church, and Ernesto’s could cater.

Bob:
Let’s meet the men she’s dating before we start planning the reception, okay?

Sue:
If she gets engaged on the show, do you think they’d get married this year? A fall wedding would be so romantic with all the leaves.

Bob:
We want Bea to be happy. That’s the main thing. We really want her to be happy.

HIGHLIGHTS FROM WYATT AMES’S
MAIN SQUEEZE
APPLICANT SURVEY, AS POSTED ON
ABS.COM

Name:
Wyatt Ames

Occupation:
Wheat farmer

Hometown:
Boone, Oklahoma

Where would you most like to travel?
Maybe Finland, or Alaska? I’d love to see the Northern Lights.

If you could have any career, what would you do?
I love working with my family. But if that weren’t a factor, I might like to work with horses, or maybe in an animal hospital.

Do you have any tattoos?
My sister and I both got our dad’s initials on our shoulders after he passed. We took his truck and snuck up to Tulsa to get them. When we got home, our mom was waiting up for us—we thought she was going to be so mad. But the next day, she drove us back to the parlor so she could get one too.

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