One Night Only (3 page)

My hands turned into fists again as I tried to not scream. My nails left red strains on my palms, but nothing distracted me from the pain this time.

I pulled my legs to myself as much as I could and tried to get smaller on my bed, like as if I got smaller the pain would become bearable. But it only got worse and I couldn’t stand it any longer, my consciousness was getting blurry. With the last effort I screamed, “Mom!”

My parents came into my room in full panic, but I didn’t have any strength to calm them. Mom was already crying and my dad was trying to put me into my wheelchair, but he was struggling to do it with his shaking hands.

I must have lost consciousness because when I opened my eyes I was already at the hospital. The pain was tolerable now, courtesy to the painkiller that was still filling my body through the needle in the back of my hand.

The moment I noticed I was alone in the room, the door opened and my parents came in. My mom looked defeated, her eyes were swollen and red. I hurt for her, but there was nothing I could do.

“April? Do you need anything?” my dad asked with a quiet but raspy voice.

I wasn’t stupid. I knew my situation was bad, beyond curable. I passed the border of caring anymore. Probably, it was kind of a self defense mechanism, shutting off and not caring about anything…not even death.

“Where is my phone, dad?” I asked, ignoring his unsure look.

He handed it to me, “I brought it while you were sleeping.”

“Thank you,” I murmured and opened facebook to find the one person I wanted to connect with: Ashton Kennedy…the dream guy.

My fingers hesitated over his profile picture, but I was dying…what else could I lose? My pride? I was sure pride wouldn’t mean anything when I was dead.

I took a deep breath and typed…

Hello, Ashton.

I’m gonna make the strangest offer of your life. It will be silly, maybe even meaningless, but I have to do this…before it is too late.

I’m not your type of girl. I don’t have a model-like body, I’m not fun, and I’m the living example of ordinary. I know we haven’t talked so much and this fact makes my offer even more absurd, but I have to tell you the truth…I love you, Ashton. My fucked-up heart in this sick and ridiculous body chose you to love.

Simply… I love you and I’m dying.

Don’t think I’m joking… I really am dying. My body became the dinner table of the fucking cancer that is eating me alive, literally. I know I have so little time left, I just don’t know how little it is. My pain became unbearable and I’m feeling it is not much. Death is so close to me.

Now, in a hospital room, I’m writing this message to you, throwing my pride out of the window, just to ask something from you…

Don’t let me spend this night alone.

I want a night from you…one night only.

I want to feel like a normal girl… for one night only…

You don’t have to do this, I know. But I’m still making the offer:

One night only…

After hitting the send button, my eyes were glued to the screen. I saw the message turn into “seen”, but there wasn’t any return message or any attempt of writing one.

I put the phone on the bed and rested my head against the headboard. I was about to check my phone again when the door opened and my doctor came in.

“How are you feeling, April?” he asked.

“I’m okay.”

“I’m sorry, April,” he said and I couldn’t help but feel surprised.

“I wish the treatments we tried could help you,” he continued. I know he wasn’t talking as a professional right now. During this hard period, he was like a brother to me and now, the brother was talking.

“Don’t worry, doc. Maybe the afterlife will be better,” I said, smiling sadly.

He nodded and said before going out of the room, “I’m gonna let you rest.”

My parents followed him outside and I grabbed my phone. There was a message and I was afraid of reading it.

I closed my eyes for a second before opening it.

Which hospital are you in?

I wasn’t expecting a message like that…

I didn’t know what to write so I went with the simple answer.

Gate Hospital. Oncology Floor. Room 204.

I saw he started to write again and the message popped up in a second:

I’m on my way.

I read and re-read his answer, searching for a cruel joke under it, but couldn’t find anything. I was too shocked to even write a simple “thank you”.

After ten minutes, the door opened again, but I couldn’t tear my eyes away from my phone. I didn’t want to see the painful look on my mom’s face, either. But as the footsteps got closer to my bed, I lifted my head to meet with Ashton’s brown eyes.

“Hi, April,” he smiled at me. Even his teeth were perfect.

“A-Ashton? You came?”

“You wanted me to come…so, here I am,” he shrugged and did something that shocked the hell out of me: he kissed my cheek.

“Wh-what are you doing?”

I was still surprised. Even as I wrote the message to him, I wasn’t expecting him to come, let alone this fast…

“Aren’t you my one-night-only-girlfriend?” he asked with a grin on his face, sitting next to me on the bed.

“I didn’t think you would really accept my offer, actually?” I said, making some space for him since he was making himself comfortable on my bed.

“I don’t get asked on dates by girls everyday. It was kind of cool,” he said, placing a loose strand from my wig behind my ear, making me comfortable with his easy-going attitude.

I hit his arm, jokingly, “Hey! Don’t remind me of that again.”

“Okay, princess,” he said and placed a bag on the bed.

“What is that?”

“My laptop, a few movies and some brochures from fast-food restaurants,” he winked at me, causing me to laugh. It was a long time since I last laughed with happiness.

“You’re good at this,” I murmured.

“Hell yeah, I am. You’re in good hands, princess,” he said.

I was grateful to him for not making it awkward. He even put his arm around me, but when I momentarily tensed with the contact he said, “Relax, okay? We are here tonight and we can have fun together.”

I nodded and stopped overthinking it when I realized this might be my last chance to be “normal”.

Checking the movies I was impressed with his choices.

“The Vow, The Notebook, Dear John, Step Up…wow, did you choose them all?”

“Actually…I may have called my sister for a little help.”

“Don’t forget to thank your sister for me,” I murmured.

“Don’t worry about it. Are you ready to start with one of them? You’ll not sleep before we watch them all, okay? I’m warning you.”

“Okay. Let’s start,” I said eagerly, but the moment the movie started my parents came in the room.

The look on their faces would have been funny if we were in any other situation. Ashton surprised me by introducing himself to my parents so respectfully.

“Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Estelle. I’m Ashton…your daughter’s boyfriend.”

My parents’ faces were similar to mine with their eyebrows raised in shock, mouths slightly open…

I got a hold of my emotions and tried to help Ashton, “Mom, Ashton thought we could watch movies. He’ll stay with me tonight if you both are okay with it.”

“Oh, sure. It’s nice to meet you, Ashton. April, your doctor said the room at the furthest corner of the hall was empty. I think we’ll stay there tonight,” my mom said with extra emphasis on “the furthest corner”.

“Nice to meet you, Ashton,” my dad said as he left the room with my mom.

“Well, that was pretty awkward,” I murmured.

He sat back next to me and replied, “Yeah, it was…but let’s not think about that. Start the movie, princess.”

When two movies were out of the way, I didn’t notice how the time had flown by.

Ashton was so much fun to be around. Even though he mocked me as I cried over some scenes in the movies, he laughed at me only after he calmed me.

“I’m hungry, princess. What about you?” he asked, rubbing his stomach, pulling my attention to the taut muscles there.

I cleared my throat, nervously, feeling flushed like I was a thirteen year old teenager. But in a way, I was…I was so inexperienced when it came to the opposite sex.

I tore my gaze from his six pack, meeting his eyes. There was a smirk on his face, letting me know he caught me checking him out, but I wasn’t uncomfortable because of him catching me.

“I think I’m hungry, too,” I murmured.

“Hmm, it seems like it,” he said, winking at me.

After checking all the brochures, we decided on the classic –pizza.

“Okay, pizza is coming. Now, tell me about yourself,” he offered.

“What do you want to know?”

“I don’t know…favorite color?” he shrugged.

“Blue and purple,” I answered. I didn’t have a favorite color, it has to be both or none.

“Favorite movie?” he asked this time.

“The Fault in Our Stars.”

“You’re kidding? Really?” he fully turned to me.

“What? That movie is beautiful…and shows the ugly face of cancer in the best way, even though it sugarcoats it with love and all,” I protested.

His face was serious as he listened to me, murmuring, “I’d better watch it.”

“What kind of books do you read?” he asked this time.

“Erotica,” I answered proudly.

“Hmm, naughty…I like it,” he laughed.

“Don’t laugh. I’m proud of what I read,” I giggled.

He pulled me toward him, causing me to lie down on the bed and said, “You must be a pro at sex, then.”

“Who knows? I thought practice was what made people perfect, not reading,” I whispered as he leaned into me.

“We can test that theory,” he whispered against my lips.

“I don’t have anything to lose,” I whispered back, suddenly feeling bold.

“I think you have, baby,” he said sweetly, pushing his hips between my legs, emphasizing his point.

Yeah… virginity… sure.

“I don’t think I will need it… after…” I started to say, but he stopped me with his lips.

I gasped at the soft touch of his lips. It wasn’t my first kiss, but in a way it was because I had never been kissed like this. His kiss was desperate, full of passion yet tender… totally different than my sixth grade kiss.

I parted my lips with the flick of his tongue on my bottom lip and he groaned as his tongue caressed mine. My hand moved to his hair, trying to get closer to him as his grip tightened on my hipbone. It hurt my sensitive body, but the pain was delicious. I wanted more.

I moaned, letting him deepen the kiss…

Only to be separated when the door opened by the nervous pizza boy.