October Joy (Moments In Paradise 1) (25 page)

“Sure,” she said, not getting what he was saying.  “For what?”

He smiled.  “For an engagement ring.”

“Oh.”  She laughed.  “I guess I will be needing one of those.”

“I told Grace and Tabby last night.”

“Did you?”

“Yes.  They were concerned about you, and I told them some of what you told me.  I hope that was all right.  I think it’s good for them to know because both of them are probably going to end up being pastor’s wives too.”

“Does Ryan want to be a pastor?”

“He doesn’t know for sure, but I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s where God leads him.  He has the heart for it, and so does Tabby.”

“What did they think?  Your girls, I mean.”

“They’re happy for us.”

She didn’t say anything, but he read her thoughts.

“They really like you, Sarah.  And they don’t think you’re a mess.  Don’t forget they lost their mother at tender ages.  They understand.”

“And they love you, Andrew.  I know they like seeing you happy.”

“Don’t feel like you have to do anything to gain their love,” he said, reaching for her hand.  “Just loving me is enough.  All you have to be is you.”

“I’m good at being me with you,” she said and laughed.  She had cried so much with him, it was a wonder he didn’t carry a box of tissue everywhere they went.  “Maybe too good.”

“No such thing, sweetheart.  I want you.  All of you.”

Andrew seemed to have all the time in the world, and they didn’t hurry through their lunch.  He asked if she planned to tell her children about the engagement anytime soon, and she said what she had been thinking.

“I think I’d like to wait a few days--give them a chance to accept the fact I’m here before I lay another huge piece of news on them.”

He seemed to understand and asked her something else she had thought about but had no real answer for.  “And when exactly would you like to have the wedding?”

“I knew you were going to ask me that.”

“Do you have an answer?”

“No.”

“Me neither,” he said.  “We can take our time.  No need to rush into anything.”

They both laughed, and Sarah knew it wouldn’t be too far away.  She wanted to have a few weeks with him here before she went back to Minneapolis to take care of some things, and then after she returned she couldn’t imagine waiting too long.  But she wasn’t speculating at this point.  For today they were engaged, and she knew it was right.  Tomorrow would be another day.

She took her time looking for a ring that afternoon, and Andrew didn’t rush her.  She actually selected one she really liked at the first place, but he said they had all afternoon, so she agreed to keep looking.  There were several she liked, but her mind kept returning to the first one, and they eventually went back, and she tried it on again.

“I want this one,” she said.  “I feel like it’s meant to be mine.”

“Then yours it shall be,” he said, giving her a kiss right there in front of the saleslady.

While Andrew was paying for the ring, Sarah looked at some of the men’s wedding bands and wondered what she would select for Andrew, or if she would have him select one for himself.  The one Annika had given him was very simple, and it suited him.  She couldn’t imagine him wearing anything too fancy, but something a little different would be nice, she thought.

When they got back to the house she asked Andrew if they could go for a walk so she could get used to the streets around here without getting herself lost.  While they were walking, his phone rang, and she could tell by his end of the conversation there was something at church that needed his attention.  They didn’t have to hurry back to the house, but when they got there, he said he would go attend to the problem and return as soon as he could.  She couldn’t complain. He had spent almost the entire day with her, but he seemed apologetic anyway.

“It’s fine, Andrew.  I know this is what you do.  I want to share in your life, not interrupt it.”

“If Grace gets here before I do, let her know she doesn’t need to make dinner tonight because I’m taking us all out.”

“Okay,” she said.  “What’s the special occasion?”

She expected him to say ‘Our engagement’, but he simply said, “You’re here.”

***

When Grace arrived at the house around her usual time, she went upstairs to change out of her work clothes.  It had been chilly today, and she pulled out a sweater from her closet.  Going back downstairs to try and decide what to make for dinner tonight, she found Sarah in the kitchen and received the news Daddy was taking them out.  She didn’t mind cooking and often found it relaxing after a day of teaching, but she welcomed the change in routine.

“How was your day?” she asked Sarah.

“Nice,” she said.  “Your dad played hooky from work to spend most of it with me.”

Grace smiled.  “That doesn’t surprise me.  He usually puts his personal life before his work whenever possible, and spending the day with his fiancée would definitely qualify for that.”

“You don’t mind?” Sarah asked seriously.

“That you’re engaged?”

“It must seem really sudden to you.”  She laughed.  “It seems sudden to me!”

Grace had a similar feeling of when she first met Sarah on Saturday.  She could tell Sarah needed her approval, and she had no problem giving it.

“I think it’s great, Sarah.  When my dad believes in something, he’s not cautious about it.  He goes with his heart.  I know he believes you’re the one for him, and for us it’s not really that sudden.  My mom’s been gone for five years, and for a sweet guy like my dad who married his high-school sweetheart, that’s a long time to be alone.”

Sarah smiled and held out her hand.  “He bought me a ring today.”

Grace took her hand, and she thought it was a beautiful ring.  She also thought it looked very similar to her mother’s.  Her dad had given it to her after holding on to it himself for a couple of years.  She kept it in her jewelry box and planned to wear it on her wedding day and to give it to her sisters to wear on theirs.

“It’s beautiful,” she said.  “Did he pick that out, or did you?”

“I did.  It was at the first place we went, and I really liked it, but we kept looking, and then I ended up back at this one.”

Grace had been willing to trust her dad’s heart on this, but seeing the ring Sarah had selected gave her an added sense this had to be right.

“Did you call your family today and tell them?”

“No.  I’m nervous about it.  I know this is right for me, but sometimes it’s hard to convince other people to see things the way I do.”

“You could have my dad call them,” she said.  “Or better yet, have him fly back with you whenever you go and ask for their permission in person.”

Sarah seemed to like her suggestions, but Grace knew she would be insecure about asking her dad to do either.  She never wanted to be a bother to anyone.

“He would do that for you, Sarah.  When are you getting married?”

“We don’t know yet.”

“Do you want to get married here or there?”

“Here, I think.  I’d like for your dad to get remarried in his own church.”

“Maybe you could go to Minnesota for a couple of weeks so he could meet your family, you could pack up your stuff, and then you could come back and have the wedding.”

Sarah smiled.  “You must be related to your dad.  That sounds like something he would say.”

“So you say it and surprise him.”

They both laughed, and Grace was amazed at the love she already felt for Sarah.  Last night she wanted to tell her dad to put on the brakes and take his time with this, but she had made up her mind to be happy for him and believe he knew what he was doing.  And now she could see why her dad didn’t want to be rational when it came to Sarah.  She didn’t want to be either.  They needed her, and she needed them.

***

Ever since they had arrived on Saturday, Andrew knew bringing Sarah back with him had been the right decision.  Having her here to meet his family had been what they needed, and Sarah had needed to know how serious his feelings were.

But as the weekend had progressed, and especially tonight as he had dinner with her and his daughters, that feeling of this being right only increased.  One of the things that attracted him to Sarah initially was her smile and delightful spirit.  And she’d had it off and on all week, but she especially had it tonight.  Andrew could imagine her being this way with Levi, and it gave him a happy feeling to know he could bring that kind of joy to her also.  But it wasn’t just him.  It was Grace and Tabitha too.

Tabby was her usual bubbly self, and she made them all laugh over and over, and her ability to make Sarah feel joy wasn’t a surprise to him.  But Gracie didn’t warm up to new people this fast, and she reminded him of Annika more than any other time he could recall.  It was like Annika was here.  Gracie was being herself but had that little something extra that had Annika written all over it, and Sarah was doing the same thing.  Separately they each had some of Annika’s qualities, but together that became more obvious, and Andrew had a definite sense Annika was watching them from Heaven and laughing right along with them.  She was here.  He could feel it.

When they returned to the house, the four of them remained there for the evening, but Tabitha had homework and Grace had papers to grade, so he and Sarah had some time alone.  He told her how he had been feeling at the restaurant, and Sarah had something to share about that too.

“When you asked me to come here, I knew I wanted to, but I was scared of what it might be like.  I was afraid it would be different than when it was just the two of us in Iowa, but I felt God leading me to go, and I knew I would be safe with you.  I had spent enough time with you to know it would probably work out between you and me, but being accepted by your kids would take time.  I trusted Jesus to lead the way and work things out eventually.”

She smiled, and he did too.

“But I never imagined it going this well.  Earlier today when you had to leave, and I knew Grace was coming home, I was nervous about having some time with her without you here too, but then it was easy and comfortable, like we’ve known each other for a long time.”

“God is in this, Sarah.  This is meant to be.  Let’s just go with it, okay?”

“Okay,” she said.  “Can you do something for me?”             

“Anything.”

“Can you call Donna and tell her I changed my mind about having lunch with her sometime this week?”

He smiled.  “I can do that.  And I know you don’t need to worry about it, Sarah.  She and Annika were really good friends, but Donna never pressured her into doing something she didn’t want to do.  They respected each other’s gifts and were close even though they were very different in a lot of ways.”

Chapter Twenty-five

Andrew had brought home the DVDs of his message series “Enjoying God”, and Sarah watched the first one on Tuesday morning after she spent some time reading her Bible, journaling her thoughts, and listening to God share His Heart with her.

She had always believed in God and done her best to live for Him, but having a personal connection with Him on a daily basis wasn’t something she had experienced like this before.  She wasn’t sure how she could have missed something that seemed so obvious now.  It was like she had been walking around in this fog--living from day to day with no real direction or sense of God’s presence, and now the fog had been lifted to reveal a glorious view of what her life was supposed to be about: To know God and His love for her in a deep, personal, and intimate way.

The first message in Andrew’s series touched on that subject.  He spent most of the time using Scripture to show God does indeed want us to enjoy Him, like David talks about in Psalm 37.  One of the things she noticed about the difference between Andrew’s teaching style and Levi’s was Andrew was very encouraging and affirming, whereas Levi had been more on the convicting side of things.  She also noticed Andrew talked about his failures and weaknesses she could identify with, rather than being made to feel like a perfect man was preaching at her about everything she was doing wrong.

He emphasized the reality we have a personal God who is deeply concerned for us, and for us to know Him is His greatest agenda.  “To enjoy God you have to know Him for who He really is, and for all that He is,” he said.  And Sarah could see how she really didn’t know God very well.  She knew the Bible well.  She had gone to Bible college for two of her four years of higher education.  She knew the familiar stories, the history of God’s people and the nation of Israel, the fundamentals of the gospel, and the many truths and principles for right-living lined out in both the Old and New Testaments.  But she didn’t know much about why God said what He said, or did what He did.

But Andrew said she could know, and God wanted her to know, and she could enjoy Him, not just be knowledgeable about Him.  He used Elijah as an example of the way it shouldn’t be, but often is.  Elijah was a great prophet of God who prayed great prayers and did whatever God asked him to do.  He asked God to reveal Himself in mighty ways, and God did.  As Andrew described him, Sarah couldn’t help but think of Levi, and Sarah wondered what the negative side to Elijah could be Andrew was hinting at.

“I’m not exactly sure why, but after Elijah destroys all the prophets of Baal, as it is recorded in First Kings 18, Elijah gets really scared and fears for his life.  In Chapter 19 we see him running away to the desert where he asks God to take his life, but God leads him on a forty day journey to Mount Sinai instead.  Once he gets there, Elijah doesn’t go up on the mountain to meet with God like Moses did.  He goes and hides in a cave.

“
‘What are you doing here, Elijah?’
the LORD says to him.  And then Elijah gives God this song and dance about being zealous and doing everything He has commanded him and yet now his life is in danger.  God doesn’t buy it and asks Elijah to come up to stand before Him on the mountain, but Elijah remains where he is in his safe little cave.  God sends a windstorm and an earthquake and fire, but He’s not in any of it.