No Turning Back (Man-Maid) (13 page)

In the past, that would’ve suited Jensen just fine. But he couldn’t lose her. She was irrevocably his, and somehow he’d figure out how to keep her.

Chapter Eight

Marquetta was in a full-fledged panic. As she attempted to sit up, every muscle in her body seemed sore and achy, even a few spots she’d all but forgotten about. Adjusting to the bright Monday-morning light streaming in through the large bedroom window, she realized two things. The first was that she’d made mad, passionate love to Jensen Kershaw, and it had been the single most wonderful experience of her entire adult life. The second: she’d gone and fallen in love with the tall, handsome man.

It was right about then that she quietly and cowardly left the bed where Jensen lay deliciously sprawled and unconscious. She tiptoed to the bathroom, flipped on the light, then stared at her own reflection. At least she thought that was Marquetta Hayes staring back at her. Heck, she barely recognized herself. She looked all rosy and mussed and sated. Of course, she had Jensen to thank for that, she thought with a dreamy sigh.

Frowning at the romantic and fanciful nature she’d worked so hard to repress, Marquetta mentally gave herself a thwack upside the head. Now what on earth was she supposed to do? She should’ve known she couldn’t spend such a delightful evening with the most perfect man she’d ever met, then just walk away without a scratch. She knew herself better. Fan-freaking-tastic.

Oh sure, last night she’d done a good job of convincing herself she was in dire need of some hot, sweaty sex, but in the bright light of day, there was no denying the obvious. Her feelings toward him had solidified when Jensen had taken her to heaven and beyond with his ardent loving. She allowed herself to recognize she’d blissfully flung open her heart and given him a huge chunk of it.

And there was only one thing to do.

Slink away like the pathetic fool she was. She just needed to be out before Jensen woke, because there was no way she could face him. She’d opened her mind as well as her heart to him. Seriously, the very last thing her heart could take right now would be the awkward, don’t-call-me, I’ll-call-you thing. And she just might have to get violent if Jensen gave her that same pitying look Sheldon had. Marquetta couldn’t handle seeing that same expression on Jensen’s handsomely chiseled face.

She knew now what she had felt for Sheldon had been nothing more than young love. With Jensen… Jensen fell into an entirely different category. Her stomach knotted and her heart squeezed tight with the thought of him seeing her in the same sad light that Sheldon had viewed her. Like some poor, pathetic girl who’d gone and lost her heart.

Carefully, so as not to rouse Jensen, Marquetta opened the door to the bathroom. When she saw he was still sound asleep, she tiptoed out of his bedroom and down the stairs. When she spotted her clothes on the living room floor, she slipped into her dress. Her panties were beyond repair, and she just didn’t feel like bothering with her bra. She located her purse and found her car keys buried inside.

She looked around the room and wondered if this was one of those times where a note was in order. Marquetta had never done the note thing, but then she’d never had a one-nighter either.

She grabbed her pen and an old grocery list from inside her purse and started scribbling out an “it was great, thanks bunches” when her eyes began to fill with tears.

Well, she’d almost made it home before the waterworks started.

She swiped at her face and propped the note against a lamp on an end table. She flung her purse over her shoulder and turned around. Oops. Too late. Sleeping
Beast
was now fully conscious and leaning against the doorway to the living room. He scowled at her as if he wanted to spank her senseless. And wouldn’t you just know that instead of feeling indignant over the idea, her body betrayed her by turning all warm and tingly. Drat it, had she no self-control at all where this man was concerned?

He started toward her and in a low, deadly voice, growled, “Going somewhere, sweetheart?”

His yummy five o’clock shadow and bare feet did a number on her. His naked chest beckoned her fingers to reach out and stroke it. He wore only a pair of well-worn jeans, and she wanted to have at him. To jump his bones all over again. Dang it, one night should have held her over. She’d even been prepared to use that one delicious night to console herself during a lot more lonely ones she knew were yet to come.

As he kept up his slow advance, Jensen asked, “Did you forget that you’re mine? There will be no scribbling out a Dear John note and walking out the door. I won’t let you go that easily.” When she only glowered at him, he smiled. “Fair warning, sweetheart, I can be very determined when I see something I want.”

She crossed her arms over her chest, well aware she wasn’t wearing her bra, and addressed him as if he were an unruly teenager. “Well, it’s too late, Tarzan. The note’s been written, and I’m leaving.”

Jensen reached out and stroked his fingers over her absurdly tangled hair. “Christ, when I woke and found you gone, I nearly lost it.” She started to protest, but he refused to let her. “Haven’t you figured out yet that this thing between us is different? It’s special.”

She accepted that Jensen made her feel loved. That he wasn’t anything like Sheldon. He was giving and sweet, persistent as hell, but she loved that about him. She’d snubbed him at every turn, but he hadn’t let it stop him from going after her. And what did he want from her exactly? Nothing, except to be with her. To have a chance to prove he was worth the effort. God, her head was spinning.

Leaning down, Jensen cupped her chin in the palm of his hand and touched his mouth to hers. She savored the heady taste of him. Slowly, he licked at the plumpness of her lips, but on the inside, deep down in her gut, she wanted Jensen in a way that bordered on insanity. She wanted to devour him. To tell him to take what he wanted. He would make her scream in pleasure if she would only give him a chance. She knew it, had experienced it already. She’d so badly wanted this to be a one-off, but now she knew she’d been fooling herself.

His tongue delved into her mouth and played with hers, teasing and tempting, driving them both mad. She heard something drop to the floor, then Marquetta had her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer, pushing against him in a desperate bid for more.

“You aren’t leaving.” He groaned as he lifted an inch from her mouth. “Not like this.”

“This wasn’t supposed to happen,” she muttered.

His blue-eyed gaze snared hers. “What wasn’t supposed to happen?”

“I know you would’ve liked this to be uncomplicated,” she explained, “but everything about me is complicated.”

He shrugged. “So it’s your impression I think I’m too much of a wimp to handle ‘complicated’?”

Her lips thinned, and her eyes darkened with a surge of anger. “You just refuse to get it through your thick head. I’m a mess. I’ve been a mess since I dropped out of college. You think you know me, but you don’t.” She tried to pull out of his arms, but he wouldn’t let her retreat.

Instead, Jensen leaned down until they were practically nose to nose and whispered, “I’m pretty fucking sure I’m falling in love with you, Marquetta Hayes.”

Oh God, she couldn’t hold up against a declaration like that. She’d never in her life been the spontaneous type, and now she knew why. “Jensen, you aren’t thinking straight.”

His entire body stiffened. “I don’t expect you to reciprocate, but don’t tell me what I feel.”

Taking a deep breath, she said, “Look, I fell in love once before, and I’m not sure I’m capable of doing it again.”

His face softened as he stared at her. “Was it so bad?”

“He was my professor,” she replied, “and he was married. That’s only part of the nightmare. So, yes, it was that bad.”

He released her hand as if burned and stepped away. Marquetta’s heart caught in her throat. His face shut down until a veritable stranger stood in front of her.

“You had an affair with a married man?” he asked as if the idea left a bad taste in his mouth. “Is this a joke?”

“Of course not,” she said, noticing a hint of ice in his eyes that hadn’t been there before. “God, Jensen, it isn’t as if I knew he was married when I agreed to go on a date with him.”

“Right.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “I’ve heard that one before.”

“Yeah, well, this time it’s true.” She willed him to listen to her. Ached for him to believe her. “I never would’ve looked at him twice if I’d known he had a wife and kids.”

A muscle in his jaw jumped. “Don’t most people make a thousand excuses when they cheat? The woman my dad slept with said pretty much the same thing as you’re telling me now. That she had no clue he was married and never would’ve given him the time of day had she known the truth. Dad had plenty of lame-ass excuses too.” He cursed. “The affair all but crushed my mom. The fights were awful. The separation wasn’t a pretty sight either. I can still remember Mom crying herself to sleep. It took them years to repair the damage. And for what? A good fuck?”

Marquetta’s heart shattered into a million pieces as he stared at her with utter contempt. “And you think I’m cut from the same cloth, is that it? That I’m the type of woman who would willingly destroy an entire family just to get my rocks off?” With a single look, Jensen gave her his answer. “Well, that definitely settles that,” she muttered as she turned to leave, her hands shaking so much she almost couldn’t hold on to her purse.

Jensen took hold of her upper arm and pulled her up short. “I told you all about my ex-girlfriend’s attempted suicide the night I made dinner for you,” he gritted out. “Why didn’t you open up about your relationship with your professor then? If you have nothing to feel ashamed about, then why didn’t you tell me before now, Marquetta?”

Her eyes widened at the absurdity of his questions. “Are you for real?” When he only glared at her, she said, “Christ, it was our second date, Jensen. That’s not something you generally share on a second date. Not to mention the fact it was none of your freaking business. In fact, it’s still none of your business.” She threw her hands in the air as anger overrode common sense. “It happened before you and I met, for crying out loud.”

“Look, I care about you and I’m willing to concede that our past relationships are just that, in the past.”

“You’re willing to concede?” Marquetta tugged her arm free, then blurted out, “Screw you!”

This time when she headed toward the door, Jensen didn’t stop her. He didn’t make a single protest. She truly hadn’t expected that. He was a fighter to the core, and she’d thought he would fight for her. God, he hadn’t cared at all. The thought gave her a sick feeling. In that moment, a right hook would’ve been preferable to the knife twisting in her stomach.

She raced toward her car, determined to be out of his sight before she broke down entirely. Once Marquetta was safely inside, the waterworks started up all over again. She hadn’t cried so hard since the awful day she miscarried. She had no idea how long she sat in her car, bawling like a baby.

When she finally gained control of herself enough to start the engine, she thought of what he’d said.
“I’m pretty fucking sure I’m falling in love with you.”
When Sheldon had left her a bleeding mess, Marquetta had thought nothing could ever hurt so much. But seeing the condemnation in Jensen’s eyes just now had torn her in two.

The hell of it was, Jensen had made her feel whole again, like a vibrant and adventurous woman. One who wasn’t scared and sad all the time. She’d wanted to experience things with him. Wonderful things. Her defenses had crumbled, and now she would pay the price.

When would she ever learn?

For the hundredth time, Jensen checked his phone. Three days ago, Marquetta had stormed out of his house. It was now Friday, and he’d texted her twice and called her once. She wasn’t responding. And why would she? After the way he tore into her, he’d be lucky if she didn’t paint
DICKHEAD
on his motorcycle.

“You’re annoying the shit out of me,” Jason said as he slammed his coffee cup down in front of him. “What’s up with you today?”

For the last hour, Jason had been sitting across from him at the kitchen table, going over their business plan. The only thing Jensen could concentrate on, though, was the stricken look on Marquetta’s face. Jesus, he’d see that image in his nightmares. What had he done? He’d gone for the jugular, and repairing the damage might be impossible. A sick feeling settled in the pit of his stomach.

“I royally fucked up with Marquetta.” He rubbed a hand over his face and stood. “She opened up to me, and I threw it back in her face.”

“That explains why she sent the logo design to me instead of you.” Jason frowned. “What dumb-ass thing did you do?”

Jensen didn’t want to share such a private conversation with his brother. Besides, he knew why he’d reacted so badly. The instant she’d told him she’d been in a relationship with a married man, Jensen had thought of his father and all the pain his infidelity had caused. It’d been a knee-jerk reaction to paint her with the same brush. But Marquetta had more integrity than that, and Jensen should’ve known better. He was an idiot.

“She confided in me,” he said, “and instead of being understanding and sympathetic, I pretty much jumped her shit.” Jensen ached all over again, thinking of the pain he’d seen on her face. Pain he’d put there. “I don’t know if she’ll ever speak to me again.”