No Service (2 page)

As she stepped down onto their site and walked past their car, she saw two other people sitting at her fire. The backs of their blue lawn chairs faced her and she could see the blonde waves of the woman with the large hair and the dark brunette shag cut of the man. It looked like they had simply plopped down like they belonged there.

“Hi, sweetie!” Chris said in a high falsetto. He stopped her with a touch of the shoulder.

She looked back and forth between Chris and the strangers.

“They wanted to come over and apologize for yesterday,” he said and in a whisper added, “They just put their chairs down and I can’t get them to leave. They really wanted to meet you, too.” He pursed his lips sympathetically.

They walked to the campfire and Jess sat down on the picnic bench facing the flames. The couple was directly across from her. The smoke moved in wavy lines of heat slightly obscuring them. They looked inhuman as their features swirled.

“Hi,” Jess said politely.

“Hi,” said the blonde. She was probably around Jess’ age, early 20s, but now she could finally see the over-tanned skin and outrageous makeup. This woman was more overdone than most drag queens even dared to look at their most flamboyant. It looked like a definite product of the Jersey Shore. Her eyelids sparkled with silver glitter. Her eyeliner was almost as thick as a finger and her false lashes were so long and heavy it was surprising she could open her eyes.

Jess put on the best expression she could muster through her horror. “I’m Jess. Nice to meet you.”

“I’m Stephanie, but you can call me Steph! This is Mark. We’re so super sorry we acted like that yesterday. We hadn’t eaten and our blood sugar was low and well… You know how that goes, right?”

Jess had no idea how that was, but agreed anyway. She couldn’t fathom a time when hunger had made her scream at anyone like that. She had definitely raged on people in her lifetime, but had never blamed it on a lack of food.

“Anyway, if we’re ever like that again, you can just holler at us to just shut the hell up,” Steph said waving a manicured hand absently.

“Um, sure thing,” Jess replied, knowing that if they started shouting again that it definitely wouldn’t be something she’d ‘holler.’ This woman was so much her opposite, it was as if she was talking to an alien from another planet with three eyes and green skin.

Chris brought over a paper plate with little link sausages cooked to absolute perfection and a plastic cup of orange juice. He sat down next to her and immediately dug in.

Jess looked down at her plate and then at the couple across from them. “I’m really sorry. We didn’t bring enough for guests.”

“S’okay,” said Mark. “You go ahead and enjoy. We’ll be on our way. We already had breakfast.”

“Right, the blood sugar thing,” Jess added awkwardly.

Quietly Mark stood up and folded his chair. Steph looked up at him and stuck out her lower lip. “But, babe, we just met them! Let’s stay and talk for a bit!”

He shook his head. “Let’s let ‘em have their breakfast in peace. We can go for a walk or something.”

In a huff, Steph violently folded her chair and brushed past him toward their own site through the thin dividing line of trees. Mark followed without a backward glance.

“They’re a little weird,” Jess mused as she took her first bite of sausage. The flavors and warmth had been worth the wait. No matter how hot the day was, a campfire-cooked meal was always worthwhile and satisfying.

Chris gave muffled assent through his own mouthful. “They’re more than-“

“I don’t have to do what you say!” shrieked a woman from the direction the couple had left. Steph’s shrill voice had stopped the birds from chirping.

Chris gave Jess a sideways look. “They said they were only here another day. Small blessings, right?”

Jess sighed. Today was the best day for a walk or a swim or anything that would take them away from camp. The terrible couple didn’t sound like they were going to the beach or doing anything besides fighting so it felt like a safe gamble.

The shouting continued through breakfast. Chris piled the dishes into a bag and tossed them into the car. “We can clean them later or tomorrow,” he said with a shrug. “Let’s just get the hell out of here.”

With beach bags on their backs, they headed out to try and enjoy themselves. The sun was bright and relentless overhead. Not a single cloud disrupted the vast sky. A person could stare straight up into the endless blue and if there were no objects in their periphery, a sense of vertigo would take hold, like you could float away forever. The leaves on the trees fluttered lightly in the soft breeze. The enveloping warmth of the day was just perfect for a cool dip in the lake, which was around the highest temp it would get each summer, a nice brisk 73 degrees Fahrenheit.

To most people, 73 degrees sounds plenty warm. It makes for t-shirt and sometimes shorts to be the attire of choice on a nice day without a lot of wind. However, 73-degree lake water means that’s the temp in the shallows near shore and on the surface further out, which hardly feels lukewarm to flesh. Anything below that takes a significant drop to goosebumps-inducing chilliness.

“I’m going to get changed. Back in a sec,” Jess said walking toward the sandstone building that housed the changing rooms for men and women on each side.

Chris nodded and began to trek down the scalding hot sand to the water’s edge.

The lifeguards would climb their tall chairs at eleven, but not a moment sooner. Getting here this early meant that swimming wasn’t officially open. They still stood by the changing room building watching for the slightest insurrection of anyone trying to even dip their toes in before it was time.

As soon as the scene was properly monitored and the little white sign by the road was switched from closed to open, the masses would descend like piranhas on fresh meat. Getting there just a little early meant a prime spot just out of reach of the lapping waves.

Chris admired the scene before him. Out on the lake, a sailboat was drifting along with a wind. It was little more than a white triangle from the beach. The lake was a beautiful dark blue-green with barely any waves. The sky was a sweet baby blue. The earth and sky met at a slate grey line across the edge of the horizon. It was barely a blip of anything at such an immense range, but it was Canada in the far distance nonetheless. Seeing it from the beach meant clear skies all the way across the entire stretch of lake.

Jess changed as quickly as possible into her bikini, trying as hard as possible to ignore the massive Daddy Long Legs spider lurking on top of the wall between her stall and the next.

Back in the light of day, she kicked off her sandals and then raced across the sand. It burnt her feet a little, but it only spurred her to race even faster. Chris was watching her intently over his shoulder through his dark sporty sunglasses.

“Nice view,” he said as she threw down her towel and smoothed it out. She giggled and jokingly punched him, then threw on a pair of sunglasses with brown large lenses and amber frames.

The relaxed in the sand as other people trickled onto the beach flapping out towels and laying down. Slowly the sand near the water filled with early birds.

“Well, hey, friends,” said a chipper voice behind them.

“No, no, no,” Jess moaned into Chris’ shoulder as she pretended she hadn’t heard.

A moment later a pair of orange-tanned legs came and stood next to them. Jess squinted up into the light. “Hi, again,” she said with the warmest fake smile she could muster.

Steph flapped her blanket out and stretched out face down. “We saw you guys heading to the beach and thought that looked like a great idea!”

Jess could practically hear the exclamation points jumping out at the end of each sentence. Mark popped his lawn chair into the sand next to Chris and dropped a cooler that sounded like it weighed a ton.

Steph reached out and tapped on Jess’s outstretched leg. “You out here for sun, too? You could get a deeper tan than that. It would look so good. I work in a salon about a half hour from here. If you wanted to come by I could hook you up with a few free coupons.”

“Oh, no thanks,” Jess said pulling her leg in just a little bit. She hoped they didn’t live in the direction she thought they did. Any other direction except east toward home would be outstanding. She prayed she never saw this woman in the city as long as she lived.

“You folks from around here?” Steph rolled on her side. Jess was shocked that Steph’s mint green swimsuit was more modest than her own. She expected this overdone woman to hang out all over the place, especially in the chest area.

“We’re from fairly close. A bit of a drive, but not bad.”

Steph raised an eyebrow at the lack of a real answer. “So what do you do? You don’t seem like the beauty salon type, no offense. I’m guessing you work retail maybe?”

Jess wasn’t sure what she was supposed to think of that statement. She applied makeup and made sure she looked good every day, but if Steph’s standard was significantly higher, or at least more outlandish, than her own, of course she wouldn’t look like she belonged in a beauty salon where this woman would ever go. On top of that, she couldn’t figure out if retail was just a guess or was meant to make a statement. Jess figured women like her were always trying to make underhanded statements.

“I do some web design work for a little company. It’s a fairly typical office job situation, but I love what I do.”

Steph seemed satisfied with the answer.

“How about you, Chris?” she said eyeing her next victim.

Chris clearly wasn’t ready to be dragged into a conversation and Mark had been keeping his silence as well.

“I work in a factory,” he said.

“Doing what?”

“I box up parts. Shipping. Packaging.”

“That must be a little strange. I bet your wife makes more money than you,” Steph said without an ounce of consideration at the words that came out of her mouth. “Isn’t that hard for you? Not to be the breadwinner?”

Chris opened his mouth and closed it again. This woman had no idea what she was talking about. No idea at all. He’d been an ER nurse before, but that was a while ago and he’d left it behind. The emergency room had been severely mentally taxing and he’d been ill-equipped to deal with how it stressed him out.

“Leave the man alone,” Mark said abruptly cutting her off.

“I am asking a simple question,” Steph spat back emphasizing every word individually.

“Whatever,” he replied. “That’s just, like, so rude.”

Jess shifted uncomfortably and looked over at Chris. He flashed his teeth in the cheesiest forced smile he could and gestured to the water. “Think I’ll go for a quick swim.”

The lifeguard finished the climb into his chair nearby. Several dozen people had already gathered and set up chairs and a few umbrellas, a huge throng was making their way toward the shore. The second his backside hit the white, painted surface of the lifeguard stand, several children raced into the surf with a great splash.

Chris shot up and sped to the water with Jess close on his heels. They immediately heard the couple burst into a hissed argument of loud whispers that everyone could hear, but were pretending not to. Embarrassed faces turned away pretending to be preoccupied with sunscreen and magazines.

The temperature didn’t feel bad close to shore, just like Jess predicted, but the second it got up past her knees her pace slowed. By the time they were getting their swimsuits wet, they were taking their time and trying to adjust slowly. Once they were soaked through it was an easy matter of splashing out into the deepest water corralled by the safety rope on large plastic bobbers that denoted the swim area. Chris was able to stand on his feet everywhere they were allowed, but Jess was a couple inches short of reaching the bottom at the far end and had to float. It was relaxing and aside from a few kids it was quiet.

“These people are so weird,” she said, thrilled that they were out of earshot. It was a great chance to gossip and reaffirm each other’s suspicions that the couple was insane. The water was making her shiver, but it was nice to be away from the bizarre duo.

“They sincerely need to leave,” Chris agreed. “I can’t wait for them to be gone tomorrow. Check out is at eleven, so they hopefully won’t bother us too much in the morning trying to get out on time.”

“Do you think they’re going to follow us around all day though?”

“Jesus, I hope not.”

“Did her comment bother you?” Jess asked. She didn’t want too much time to pass where it would seem more like nagging to bring it up and have to remind him of everything that had been said.

Chris treaded the water, despite not actually needing to. He looked thoughtfully at the rocky outcropping past the swim area where large boulders jutted out into the lake. It broke up the beach areas along the shore and provided a break wall. The lifeguard was yelling through his megaphone at a few teens to get off the rocks and obey the posted signs. Chris finally shrugged.

“So, it does or it doesn’t?”

“Just don’t worry about it.”

“Well, I am worried about it.”

Chris stared her straight in the eyes. “Well, don’t. It doesn’t really matter. Does it?”

Jess studied him for a moment, but he ignored her stares and splashed away as if to separate himself from the situation. She wanted to address it before he mulled it over and got upset later bringing it up in a fight days or weeks in the future, but she knew there was no point trying to solve anything right then and there.