Night of the Candles (29 page)

“The man deserves to die.”

“I think, sometimes, that forcing him to live is the worst thing we could do to him,” she said, making as if to pass him.

He put out his hand and caught her arm. “Why are you staying, Amanda? This man,” he tilted his head toward Theo’s door, “means nothing to you.”

“I’ve told you. Someone has to stay with him.”

“Then let his sister do it. Let Jason hire some help, another nurse, like that Marta who ran off.”

“I couldn’t. What would they think if I left while I was still needed?”

“That’s just it. They don’t need you. Listen to me, Amanda. I’m tired of being kept on a leading rein. I’m leaving in the morning. I want you to come with me. If not…” He took a deep breath, “if not, I’ll go alone.”

“Oh, Nathaniel, I wish you would try to understand…”

“I … think I do, Amanda. I wonder if you do?” His eyes were serious, but not patient. “I will be leaving at first daylight, in case you change your mind.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” she said, but he was already walking away down the hall.

Before Nathaniel left, the emotion … whether pride, indignation, or merely exasperation … that had caused him to issue his ultimatum made him also bring the thoughts hovering in all their minds out into the open.

At the supper table that night he waited until dessert had been placed before them, then he leaned back in his chair. His voice, when he spoke, was quiet but firm. “I will be leaving in the morning, but before I go there are a few things I would like cleared up. For instance, this accident of Amanda’s the first day. What really took place there? I understand this Carl was present. Was he responsible?”

Sophia toyed with her fork. Jason stared at Nathaniel, a thoughtful look in his dark eyes.

“Please, Nathaniel,” Amanda said.

“No, I want to know. What’s the use of keeping quiet? I’m a little tired of these unexplained events and secret passions.”

“Some things can’t be explained.”

“Hogwash!”

Jason spoke at last. “What do you think happened?”

“From what Amanda says, I would say she was given a little push!”

Silence.

“Why?” Jason’s voice held nothing but curiosity, still there was a flatness in his tone that spoke of controlled anger.

“For the necklace, that’s why.”

“Oh, Nathaniel, there is no need for this. I told you Jason refused the necklace.”

“All right, all right! I suppose it’s possible it was an accident, but I beg leave to doubt it. There have been too many accidents and peculiar happenings around here, and I intend to get to the bottom of it.”

Amanda’s face was flushed with embarrassment. She looked at the wall behind his head, wishing there was some way she could make him stop.

“Well,” he demanded of her, “can you deny it?”

“Perhaps … perhaps I only imagined much of it. It could have been all in my head, like the other times, the times I can’t remember when I walked and talked and acted unlike myself…”

For a moment he appeared nonplussed, then he blinked and a look of rejection made his face blank. It was as if he refused to think of the possibilities her words conjured up, as if his refusal could deny the existence of such a possibility.

“Are you trying to say you imagined the runaway? What about the gum balls … or whatever it was that frightened the horse? They were real enough.”

“Nathaniel, I wish you wouldn’t,” she whispered miserably. She didn’t know why talking about these things disturbed her so, but it did.

Nathaniel ignored her, leaning back in his chair.

“Nobody wants to talk? Well, I’ll tell you then. That day of the runaway when you were all so set on chasing Carl? Well, I had nothing against the man. I sort of lagged behind after a minute or two. I saw who dropped back and crept around picking up sweet gum balls. Being a curious fellow, I decided to see what was taking place. By the time I could see what was going on the horses were off, and it was too late to prevent it. Luckily no great harm was done. I thought that I would be taking Amanda away soon. I figured no real harm was meant by a jealous attack like that. I’m not so sure now. At any rate I held my tongue but kept watch. I went out of my way to make a confidant of this person. And sure enough, I was enlisted in a plot to get rid of Amanda … in any way I could or would.”

He stopped for a moment, his eyes on the table. Then, quite deliberately, he looked at Sophia. “I think … though I have no proof, mind, that this person gave Amanda just a little push that first night with the intention of keeping her around long enough to get hold of the necklace. It must have been a shock when it disappeared. But came the discovery of what proved the worst mistake. Amanda was not a milk-and-water miss like Amelia. She was dangerously strong in the kind of grace and character that appeals to a man. Hence, the decision to scare her away, an injured woman. It made little difference how … or whether the experience proved fatal. If one thing did not get rid of her, try another. Work on her fiance. Frighten him and maybe he would take Amanda away with him. Arrange a visit from the nightriders, not a difficult thing to do when a close relative, who rode with them as a solace to his grief and guilt, was cooperative.”

“You don’t mean …?” Amanda could not finish the question. Theo. Nathaniel was trying to say without a blatant accusation that it had been Theo who rode with the Knights of the White Gardenia.

“Exactly,” Nathaniel said, seeing her gray eyes fixed in horror on Sophia. “Fear didn’t move the fiance, then perhaps jealousy would be the lever? That one came close to working. Now, I could put a name to this troublemaker but after my subterfuge it hardly seems the gentlemanly thing to do. However, I will bend my principles a little if it becomes necessary for Amanda’s happiness.”

Abruptly Sophia’s nerve broke. She slammed her chair back and jumped to her feet. “It’s not true! Lies, nothing but lies! You made it all up out of whole cloth! Lies! Lies!”

“Now why would I do that?” Nathaniel said gently. “I have nothing to gain, nothing at all.”

“You’re a stupid fool, that’s what you are, full of the notions of what is becoming in a gentleman!” Sophia attacked him bitterly. “You could have won if you had only had a little resolution.”

“You can’t force happiness, Sophia,” Nathaniel said with a seriousness that made him more attractive than he had been at any time since his arrival. “Scheming and conniving, setting traps — only scare it away. I’m sorry for the hand I took in your plans but I changed nothing, Sophia. Your chance for happiness was already gone. You saw to that without my help.”

Nathaniel left as planned. Amanda walked out to the gate to wait for him. When he pulled the buggy up beside her, she gave him her hand. “I wanted to thank you, Nathaniel,” she said, smiling.

“There is no need,” he replied, retaining her fingers in his grip. “I owed you something for my blindness.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Over the … the spirit of your cousin, or whatever you chose to call her effect on you. I shall never forget the moment when that huge dog leaped for your throat. I expected to see you torn apart, horribly mangled, before my eyes. Then you called your cousin’s name, and that beast turned aside in midair. For a few brief seconds, I actually saw a change come over you, a change I cannot explain by logical means. Your face altered in small ways, as did your gestures, and there was a radiance about you. More than that, the dog recognized you, licked your hand, obeyed your unspoken command.” He pressed her hand and released it. “If only I had listened to you. The only thing I can do now is ask for your forgiveness and take it as a lesson not to be so pigheaded in the future.”

“You are too hard on yourself. I doubt seriously that I would have believed it myself if such a tale had been told to me in the bright light of day. Let us not speak of it anymore. Instead, let me apologize. I am sorry for everything, Nathaniel.”

“So am I,” he said, answering only the last. “I hope you will always be happy.”

Now that she was free, Amanda found herself returning his smile and his liking with genuine regard. “Thank you. I will wish you the same.”

The last were banal words, but what else was there to be said? She stepped back as the buggy began to move. When it was out of sight, she went in to breakfast with Jason.

It was a strained meal with only the two of them. Sophia was gone; she had packed bag, parcels, and trunks, then fled in the night like Marta, except that she had demanded frigidly that Jason drive her and her brother into town.

“What of Theo? What will you do?” Jason had asked, but Sophia had hardly looked at him. “We have taken care of each other for some time. Why should now be any different … or of any interest to you?”

But for all her sarcasm, Amanda heard Sophia promise finally to allow Jason the pleasure of seeing that Theo was established with their doctor in his clinic, with nurses to guard him, while she herself was going to a hotel.

“You are very quiet this morning,” Jason said.

Amanda looked up nervously. “Yes … I suspect it’s the … letdown.”

“You must be tired after all your interrupted nights lately.”

She nodded. “Still, it’s not just that. Everyone has gone. Everything has changed.”

“Yes. You are ready?”

“Yes.” She was packed, she wore her traveling dress, and her bonnet hung near to hand on the halltree near the door. She was ready.

“I would like for you to stay, if the situation were different.”

She smiled her understanding. Yes, propriety. He had returned from taking Sophia into town around three in the morning, but he had not slept under his own roof. The conventions. She was unmarried, unchaperoned. Nor had she slept.

“Are you sure you are well enough for this trip?”

Glancing up at him through her lashes, she was gratified to discover true concern in his face.

“Do I look so like a hag then?” she asked with a try at sprightliness.

“You look … lovely,” he said, which might have been encouraging if he had been looking at her rather than his coffee cup.

She took a bite of biscuit, but felt as if it would choke her.

“So, you are not going to marry your Nathaniel?”

She swallowed with difficulty. “No, I … we are not suited.”

“It was lucky you discovered it before it was too late.”

“Yes … wasn’t it?” she said only managing to prevent a quaver from invading her voice.

“Marriage is serious. It lasts … a lifetime, and it’s very easy to be mistaken about the people you think you love.”

“I … can see how it might be.”

“For God’s sake, Amanda,” he burst out suddenly. “Help me. Don’t sit there agreeing with me and saying ‘yes, it is’ and ‘no, it isn’t.’ Say something.”

She looked up, meeting his eyes squarely. “All right, I will say something. I will ask you, did your child die with Amelia?”

“No.”

“You seem very sure.”

“Why shouldn’t I be? She had been … ill for some time. I thought I married a woman and got instead a child … no, a doll, demanding unquestioning loyalty and worship, not just love. I was supposed to place her and her demands above all else, even our welfare, our security. I must bow to her will … or else. There is no tyrant like a beautiful, spoiled young woman. When I refused to bow, she looked elsewhere for subjects. I was too involved with my work, I will admit. I suppose it could even be true that she was neglected. But I will never believe there was a child — mine, or Theo’s. I doubt, despite the prattlings of that pathetic old woman who called herself a nurse, that even Amelia believed in enslavement to that extent.”

Amanda was not so certain, but she did not argue with him. What did it matter now? “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

Jason sighed, running his fingers through his hair; then he closed his eyes, turning his head to shut out the sight of her face. “No, perhaps not,” he agreed.

Amanda pushed back her chair and stood up. “I guess we had better go,” she said huskily, turning toward the door.

“Wait, I have something I wanted to give you.”

She stopped in the hall, looking back. “Oh?”

He took something from his pocket as he moved toward her. It was wrapped in a silk handkerchief, and he unrolled it into his hand before he handed it to her.

“The collar of Harmonia…” she breathed. “Where did it come from?”

“While we were searching for Carl, I came upon his treasure bag. He must have lost it, or hidden it, there where he left the woods. The bag itself was … scorched, but the necklace is unhurt.”

“I would have hated to never know what had become of it. Thank you, Jason. But are you sure?”

“You’re not trying to offer that thing to me again, are you?”

“N … no,” she said with a shaky laugh.

“Then we had better go.”

She nodded but her gaze was still on the necklace. Poor demented Carl. She hoped it had brought him some pleasure. Little else had. To die in an agony of mind and soul and body … Carl, with the dog Cerberus. Theo had cast him in the role of Charon, the keeper of the ferry of death. A man with such a job would have needed to be a little mad.

“Don’t think of it,” Jason said softly.

She looked up to see him standing at the open door, her bag in one hand and an unfamiliar leather case in the other.

“There must be some mistake,” she said, coming to his side. “That isn’t my bag.”

“No, it’s mine.”

“Oh … are you staying in town then?” In town, near Theo … and Sophia?

“No, I’m carrying you home, remember?”

“But … I thought you were going to take me into town to catch the stage.”

“No.”

“I … if I had known you were going to so much trouble, I could have gone with Nathaniel.”

He smiled as he looked into her worried and slightly bewildered face. “Then what would I have done for company?”

“You … you were going anyway?”

He set the bags down and gently caught her arms. “Do you think it will look odd if I stay a few days … if there is a room vacant in the hotel … visiting my late wife’s only relative?”

“Not odd, I suppose.”

“Suggestive?” he guessed with resignation.