Authors: Kathi S Barton
~~~
Morgan blinked open her eyes against the harsh light. She didn’t know where it was coming from, but it seemed to be shining right into her head.
“Hello, Morgan. Welcome back.” It was Damon and he was the source of light. He was trying to blind her with a flashlight that she could finally see in his hand. He let her move away from the light.
“Where...where am?” She couldn’t make her words form, but he seemed to understand.
“You’re in Grant Hospital. You’ve been here four days. You gave us quite a scare. Please don’t do that again. Do you remember what happened?” Nickolas. She’d been at Nickolas’ apartment. Sex. She’d told him... Yes, it came back to her with perfect clarity. He’d said he didn’t love her.
“Yes. When can I go home?” His laughter startled her. She wanted to go home. There were still things she needed to get taken care of.
“I believe it would be better if you stayed here. At least until the babies are born. You’ve been in and out of labor for the past four days. Now that you’re awake, I’d like to deliver them and get them into your arms for a change. How does that sound?”
“Labor? I don’t...it doesn’t hurt. Shouldn’t it hurt?” She rubbed her hand along her belly and felt the difference immediately. It was harder and lower.
“You will. I need to call Nicky and let him know...”
“
No
! I don’t want him here. I don’t want to see him. He’ll...when they’re born, then he can come. Not yet.”
“I’m sorry, Morgan, but I have to call him. He’s my brother and I can’t...
Whatever differences you two have can be worked out, but he’ll never get this opportunity again to see his first child born.” Morgan knew he was right. And, she thought, its part of the contract they had together, that he be there when they were born. She only nodded and turned away from him. She didn’t know how long labor was, but it would be over soon and she’d be moving on.
Nickolas arrived an hour later. Damon told her that he waited as long as he could, telling her she needed to be prepped anyway.
Morgan was taken down to labor and delivery about twenty minutes after she woke up. She already had an IV in, so all they needed to do was add another line to the one she already had running. Damon explained all the equipment to her and what he was going to use to begin with. She had opted for an epidural and they were waiting until she was five centimeters before they administered it to her. Damon had just finished examining her when Nickolas walked in.
“Good timing. She’s moving right along now. You’re at four centimeters now, so within the next hour, we’ll have Dick come in and give you some happy meds. You’ll need to be very still when he injects you so you’ll need someone to hold you. Nicky, can you hold her up while he does it?”
“No, he doesn’t have to. I’d rather...it’s okay. I don’t need him to hold me. I’ll be very still,” she said.
“Morgan, don’t be stupid. He’ll hold you. Now, I don’t want any more of this shit going on in my delivery room, understand me? The two of you will work together on this, or I’ll go home. I’ve got more important things to do than to watch you two bicker about who does what. I’m in charge, and do as I say.” Damon looked at her first and when she nodded, he glared at his brother. When he nodded too, Damon started barking orders to the staff.
“Mom and the others are in the waiting room. They want to know if it’s okay if they come in to see you before we start.”
Morgan realized that this would be the last time she’d see them. Because after today, there’d be no reason for them to want her around anymore. She nodded at him, her throat suddenly closed up tight.
Mrs. Parker came in first, and hugged her tightly. Morgan took her hand and laid it on the foot she could feel pressing tightly against her belly.
“Thank you, Mrs. Parker. Thank you for everything you did for me,” Morgan said to her softly.
“Morgan, do you think you could call me Margaret just this once? I was hoping for Mom, but I’ll take Margaret.”
“Thank you, Margaret. Thank you very much.” With another tight hug, she left. The men came in next. All five of them huddled around her like a brigade of troops.
They all hugged her tightly and Spencer handed her a small planter from Meggie. “They won’t let her come up. But Tansy said she’d sneak her up later to see you.” Morgan nodded. She was beginning to think that she’d never be able to speak again around the knot in her throat. A few minutes later, they were ushered out.
Dick Sergeant came in and told her what was involved in the epidural. She leaned all her weight forward onto Nick so that Dr. Sergeant could get her back without any problems.
The pain was horrific and she couldn’t hold back her cry no matter how hard she tried. Nick started cooing at her, telling her he had her. She couldn’t listen over the pain. Soon, it was over and she was lying back on the bed.
Almost at once, she could feel the pain recede. She knew the contractions were getting stronger because the monitor on the wall would beep rapidly when she had one. Nick had started telling her when the contractions were beginning, but she wouldn’t look at him, so he stopped.
At six-thirty, nearly five hours after she was injected, she felt the urge to push. The room became a blur of movements and voices. Nick kept mopping her face and giving her ice chips whenever she seemed to need them. They had long given up even the pretense of trying to talk to one another. He just watched her, and when she must have looked needy, he’d mop.
“All right, Morgan, Nicky, it’s show time. You’re fully dilated and effaced.
The next time you have the urge to push, Morgan, I want you to push from here, all right?” He patted her bottom as he spoke.
Nick was asked to get up behind her on the bed and hold her up, bending her at the waist to help with the pushing. He was to keep her focused and to have her rest between contractions. Without a word, he did what he was asked.
Nearly thirty minutes later, Damon shouted he had a head. Five minutes after that, he was laying a little body on her lap. Morgan closed her eyes. She couldn’t get attached to him this late in the game. When the nurse took him away, she leaned heavily back against Nick before she thought. She started to pull away and forward when he told her to be still.
“Did you see our son, Morgan? Isn’t he beautiful?” She didn’t answer because the next contraction hit hard.
Baby boy two didn’t want to be born, she thought. Not that she could blame him. The world was cold and cruel. Twenty-nine minutes after his brother came into the world, baby boy Grant two was born.
Morgan was drained and exhausted. By time they had finished cleaning her up and her bed cleaned too, she was asleep. She didn’t move when they came into check her, nor did she stir when someone came in and took her temperature and blood pressure. For a full twenty-eight hours, she slept.
As soon as she opened her eyes, she searched for the phone. It was time to go. Morgan knew that the sooner she left, the better off everyone would be. She reached for the phone to call Mrs. Sugar.
By prior arrangement, Libby would come as soon as she called her. Libby would come to the hospital and bring Morgan everything she needed to leave and while she left the hospital, Libby would wait in her bed until some noticed the switch. Morgan wasn’t waiting to be released. She was just going to go.
“I’m ready, can you come now?” Morgan didn’t even know what time is was and hoped that she hadn’t woke them up. Mick sounded fine and wide awake when he answered.
“Yeah, darling. We’ll be there as soon as I can get the car started. Should be in about ten minutes.”
They were there in seven. Morgan moved to the bathroom and changed with Libby’s help. She hadn’t realized she’d be so weak. Only having to stop twice, she was dressed in less than five minutes. She was nearly to the door when she turned around and put the little planter that Meggie had sent her into her regular purse.
Morgan was leaving the pink bag behind. There was no way she could carry it without someone noticing it. Also, she didn’t know if she could look at it again without thinking of all that she was leaving behind. Kissing Libby on the cheek, Morgan and Mick left her room. She was crying softly when they got to the elevators and nearly had to be carried by Mick by the time they got there.
Mick pushed the button for the elevator and looked at her. “Morgan, honey, I want you to know that we love you like a daughter. In fact, sometimes, I think we love you more than our own kids. I want you to know this was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”
“Thank you, Mr. Mick. I’ll always remember this. I swear I’ll try and keep in touch with you.” The elevator dinged and she looked at it expectantly.
“I surely hope so. Morgan, I’m so sorry honey. But this is the only way. It had to be done.” She looked at him, confused, and watched as he walked away.
As the door opened, she suddenly understood.
“Morgan, love, were you going somewhere?”
Damn it. Mick had ratted her out to Nickolas.
“Dr. Grant. I’m going home. We had a deal. I lived up to my part, now I want you to live up to yours. Let me go home.” If she didn’t sit down soon, she was going to fall down. Damn him for being a strong man.
“I want to show you something first. It’s just down here.” He stepped out of the elevator and took her arm and headed them toward the nursery. Not now; she couldn’t do this now.
“Oh no, I don’t think so. The last time you wanted to ‘show’ me something, I made a fool of myself. If it’s all the same to you, I’ll just stay right here and you can show someone else. Someone more in your league.” Okay, the wall was looking really good right now. Moving toward it, because the stupid thing was moving, she reached out to touch it. It suddenly wasn’t there. It had moved at least ten more feet away.
That stupid floor was moving now, so fast too. If she wanted to, she thought, she could practically touch it without bending over. But the shouting, it had to go. “Morgan? Morgan!”
~~~
Slowly, Morgan started to make her way up from the deep darkness where she’d been. She felt heavy and weightless at the same time. She opened her eyes and looked around in the semi darkness. The hospital again. Damn it, was she never going to be able to make a clean escape.
“No, I don’t plan on letting you escape again,” Nickolas said from behind her. She rolled over to her back and looked toward where she thought he was.
He was lying in the bed next to her.
“I thought I was talking to myself. I didn’t realize that I’d spoken out loud.
Why are you here? I thought you’d be home with your sons.” Morgan wanted to reach up and smooth the hair off his forehead. Touching him would solve so many of life’s problems, and create so many more.
“I can’t take them yet. I haven’t even been down to see them yet,” he said softly.
How was that possible? She’d been here at least two days. Damon said that they were healthy and...oh God!
“What’s happened to them, Nickolas? Are they hurt? Sick? Tell me. Oh, my poor little... Why are you laughing at me? This is not funny.” She smacked him on the chest.
“You know, you only call me by my first name when you’re being passionate about something? Our sons are fine. I wanted to see them the first time with their mom. You see, I got this delivered the morning before you had them.” He leaned over and picked up something from the bedside table. “In it is the deed to the house and an account that gives them all your money. I thought that was a very strange gesture for a woman who claims she doesn’t know how to love anyone.”
“I loved you and look where that got me.” She regretted it as soon as she said it. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t...it’s not your fault. I’m just, I’d like for you to go now.” Morgan tried to roll back over and he stopped her.
“Morgan, I’m the one who is sorry. I was stupid and...” He paused and looked down at her.
“Yeah, go on.”
He burst out laughing. Then she did something incredibly stupid. She let him kiss her.
It was tender and soft. Barely a touch to her mouth. His breath was warm, his tongue hot against her lips. When he pulled her lower lip into his mouth, she moaned at the sensations he created.
“Oh, Morgan. I do love you.”
Pulling back from him, she looked at his face. Tears had welled in his eyes and he looked so sad.
“I have to tell you a story. My wife Margo and I had been childhood sweethearts. I met her in first grade and we stayed as friends, even when I went to private school. We didn’t always get along. Seldom a day went by that we didn’t fight about something. As we got older, the fights took on a surreal quality to them. We’d fight then have this incredible sex. But now I realize that’s all it was. Sex.
“When I got out of high school and moved home, she was there. One night after we’d had sex, she told me she was pregnant. I was overwhelmed and happy. A baby. Of course, we got married a few weeks later, and that’s when things started getting bad.
“You see, she wasn’t pregnant at all. She’d trapped me. About a month after our wedding, she started having an affair. I guess I knew she’d been sleeping around, but I thought after we married she’d settle down. It only got worse.” He rolled to his back and pulled her to him tightly. Morgan didn’t say anything but let him talk.
“On our first wedding anniversary, she claims she’s pregnant again.” He was quite for so long she thought he was going to stop. She knew that this is what he’d been leading up to. Leaning up, she looked down at him this time. “It wasn’t yours, was it? Oh, Nickolas... she was a fucking bitch.” He laughed and pulled her to him again. “My protector. Yes, she was. She claimed the baby was mine. But I knew that we’d stopped having sex about three months before this. It wasn’t as though she hadn’t been trying to...hummm, lure me back, but I’d just had enough. Then when that wasn’t working, a couple of months later, she said that it was my father’s. I didn’t want to believe her. I’m still not sure, but...”
“They died together. It wasn’t your dad’s either. I just know it. She wanted to hurt you and found a way to do it. Oh, Nickolas, I’m so sorry.” She huddled down onto his chest again and cried softly over his heart.