Neverland Academy (15 page)

Finn
stretched his arms long over his head well before he was ready to open his
eyes. When he did, he rubbed them lazily and scanned the dark room he shared
with the other boys. It was empty, but somebody had left the lantern lit for
him. He wondered how long he’d been sleeping. It had been a late night. After
he spent nearly three hours reflecting by the lake and drinking half the bottle
of whiskey, he’d followed through with his plan to plant the weed in Professor
Vermin’s office. Then he snuck into the Lily’s house to leave a note
instructing her to send an anonymous email to the local police department. By
the time he’d returned to the cellar he’d sworn it was nearly sunrise already.

The
aromatic blend of Daphne’s sweet scent and bug spray lingered on his shirt,
bringing back memories of the kiss. He needed to change it, but didn’t want to
give up the smell. He’d hurt her last night, that much he knew. It wasn’t
supposed to be that way. They weren’t supposed to fall for each other. That was
not
part of the game. But he
had
fallen for her. And even after hours of drinking and
contemplating, he still didn’t know what to do about it.

One
thing he did know, though, was that he needed to apologize. No matter what had
happened, or what might happen in the future, he couldn’t let her leave, at
least not yet. There was still work to be done. And, deep down, he didn’t want
her to hate him.

When
he’d arrived in the cellar Finn stood in the entrance. His jaw dropped. The
room looked like the remnants of a crazy, drunk, high school keg party. The
entire room had been toilet papered from floor to ceiling in methodical
inverted arches. At each point where the arches connected was a large brown
paper starburst or flower, he couldn’t quite tell the difference. Hangman and
Shag were busy hanging more up along the walls closest to Finn. Daphne and Toot
were kneeling on the floor holding paintbrushes dripping with yellow and red.

“What
the . . .” Finn couldn’t even finish. He’d never seen anything like this
before. It was incredible.

Daphne
turned to look at him, but said nothing before returning to her work. Her face
was devoid of emotion.
It’s too late
, he
thought. Hangman dropped a paper starburst and approached Finn.

“What
do you think?”

“This
is for Lily’s party?”

Hangman
nodded.

“This
is awesome!” Finn beamed.

“Daffy,
is the banner done yet?” Hangman called out.

“Almost.
It’ll need a few minutes to dry.” Daphne put the finishing touches on the “Y”
and stood up, stretching her legs. She reached her arms up, arching her back,
lengthening the stretch. As she did, her blouse lifted, revealing a thin strip
of midriff. Finn couldn’t take his eyes off her.

“Hey,
Finn?” Hangman waved a hand in front of Finn’s face to gain his attention.

“Yeah,
sorry.”

“Did
you do it?”

“Do
it?”

“Yeah,
you know the—” Hangman cupped his hands around his mouth and bellowed
like a police siren.

“Oh,
yeah. Yeah, I did. I went with the pot plan. The poison seemed too risky.” That
caught Daphne’s attention. He smiled briefly at her, but she did not return it.
Turning back to Hangman, “Have you heard anything yet?”

“No,
but we’ve all been down here most of the day.”

“Wish
I could be there to see Trappe piss his pants.”

“Me
too.” Hangman slapped Finn on the back. “Well, I’d better get back to work.
Gotta have this place ready for Lily in an hour so we can rest up before the
party.” Finn nodded as Hangman left his side. His gaze still rested on Daphne.
Was she mad at him? Was she ignoring him? Or was she just doing that thing that
girls do, to get attention?

He
had to say something. Finn willed his feet to move forward, despite their
sudden refusal. Why was he nervous? He’d never felt this way before about
anything, especially not a girl. He’d put himself in danger’s way countless
times, risked getting caught by Trappe or worse, and had never been as afraid
as he was now. He shoved his hands deep into his pockets to steady the tremble.

“Hey
Daffy,” he murmured. She wiped her hands on a crumpled strip of paper towel and
glanced up at him, her eyes cold and emotionless.

“Yes,
Finn?”

“Can
we talk?”

“Sure.”
She crossed her arms and stood unmoving, that same emptiness filling her
irises.

“I
mean, can we talk alone?” Finn whispered, hoping that the boys wouldn’t catch
on that he had feelings for this girl. That he had a weakness. If they did, he’d
never hear the end of it.

“I
don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

“Please,
it’ll only take a second.”

Daphne
rolled her eyes and looked around the room, judging the completion of her
project. She sighed deeply before replying, “Okay, whatever.”

“Daffy,
I’m really sorry.” Finn said as soon as they left earshot in the middle of the
tunnel. “I messed up. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. Please don’t leave.”

“Leave?
I’m not going to leave.” Daphne almost laughed.

“You
aren’t?” Finn’s stature straightened, as if a fifty-pound weight were lifted
from his chest.

“No,
why would I? I like it here.”

“But
last night . . . you looked so hurt. Like you were going to cry or something.”

“Don’t
be silly, Finn.” Something that resembled a smile crossed her face, though there
was fallacy in it. “I’m fine. You made everything perfectly clear to me last
night. And I should have known better. I won’t make the same mistake again.”

“Mistake?”
Finn, tormented by the battling emotions in his head, sighed heavily. “There
was no mistake. And it’s nothing to be ashamed of, Daffy.”

“What
makes you think I’m ashamed?” Daphne lifted her chin in defiance. With a gentle
hand, Finn reached out and caressed it. Daphne’s eyes began to soften. “Stop,”
she said. Finn continued to stroke her face, cheek to chin. He couldn’t stop.
He didn’t want to. His face drew nearer to hers and a vulnerability began to
peek out through her cold stare.

“Stop,”
she said again, but he didn’t. His hand glided down the side of her neck to her
collarbone, softly stroking the discolored bruises with a feather-light touch.
She began to tremble and he heard her gasp under her breath.

“Stop,”
she said once more, this time faltering.

“I
can’t,” Finn argued and he pulled her to him. She struggled this time, pushing
and writhing, until she let herself go, accepting the emotions she was fighting
so hard to block. “There you are,” Finn said, letting her go. “You can’t hide
your feelings, Daffy. Any more than I can hide mine.”

“You
have no feelings, Finn. I know that now. You’re just a player.”

Finn’s
gaze hardened on her. “No feelings? A player?” He was left speechless. There
was only one thing he could think of to convince her.

Finn
pushed Daphne against the cold bricks, pressing his body hard against hers. He
clawed her hair and kissed her so intensely that she moaned audibly. Energy
rushed through him. It felt like the thrill of getting caught by Trappe and
narrowly escaping, but intensified. At first Daphne resisted, as she did
before, but then she relaxed into it and returned his kiss with equal passion.
This felt so right to Finn. Even though he knew it was wrong. So wrong. Before
Daphne had come into his life he always knew who he was and where he belonged.
But now . . . now he felt more lost than ever.

Chapter
Seventeen

Birthday
Surprise

Daphne paced anxiously
, counting
seconds in her head, trying to keep the deluge of feelings rushing through her
bottled up. An explosion was building up within her. She was still giddy from
the unexpected kiss. And now, she was nervous, hoping that the party she had
planned for Lily would meet her expectations. She didn’t want to disappoint the
only girlfriend she had here, especially after all Lily had done for her.

Music
was pounding from the TV through the DVD player, and the boys were crowded
around the shelves, where Daphne had set up the food Finn had stolen after
dinner: bags of chips poured into bowls, crackers and cheese arranged neatly on
a plate, and chocolate chip cookies, stacked and organized to look like a
birthday cake, complete with a candle on top. Daphne had insisted going with
Finn to get the food since she had no intention of her party guests eating
directly out of the packaging. She made sure to take some dishes and cups for
serving. On a separate shelf, Daphne set out a bowl of spiked punch, prepared
herself with a splash of cheap rum from the faculty dining room.

Off
to the side, on another shelf, was the remainder of the stolen Glenfiddich with
a few glasses. Josh and Max huddled over the punch, quaffing the spirits that
they would normally have no access to.

“Daph,
you look nervous,” Max said. “Have a drink and calm down.” He raised the bottle
of whiskey and smiled.

“No
thanks,” Daphne said, taking note of the slight slur in Max’s voice. She would
be drinking light tonight since she felt responsible for her brothers. “I’ll be
fine once Lily gets here.” Daphne giggled at her brothers’ behavior. Josh,
usually on the straight and narrow, was remarkably laid back, obviously getting
tipsy from the alcohol. Max, on the other hand, seemed to be increasing his
volume as the minutes ticked by. Daphne had never really noticed it before, but
the other boys seemed disinterested in the alcohol. She’d seen them drink
before, so they weren’t complete teetotalers, but they certainly weren’t as
enthusiastic about it as her brothers, who seemed to be inhaling it. She
supposed that when they were free to do it any time they wanted, the novelty of
it wore down.

Daphne’s
thumping heartbeat climaxed when she finally saw Lily appear with Finn at the
entrance to the cellar. At first she wasn’t sure who caused that reaction in
her: Lily or Finn. She hadn’t seen Finn since they kissed in the tunnel earlier
and though she was happy, she didn’t want to get her hopes too high. She wasn’t
really sure what his feelings were toward her. Her nerves settled quickly when
she saw the captivated look on Lily’s face. Lily’s eyes widened in delight and
her broad smile was worth a whole month of stealing toilet paper.

“Daffy,
this is amazing!” Her face glowed with the alternating reds, yellows, blues,
and greens of the party lamp Kevin had rigged and installed on the ceiling.

“Happy
birthday,” Daphne said as she hugged Lily. Behind Lily, Finn stood gazing at
Daphne. He gave her a quick wink, which made her pause. How could such a tiny
gesture send intense shockwaves through her chest?

“I
can’t believe you did this,” Lily said. “This place . . . are you sure this is
the cellar?” Daphne laughed and nodded. “You are a miracle worker. You think
you could redecorate my bedroom?”

“Only
if you want it to look like the boys’ bathroom,” Daphne quipped.

“Seriously,
Daffy. It looks great. Thank you.”

Daphne
dragged Lily to the center of the room and started dancing. As the two danced,
Finn leaned against the back wall, watching Daphne’s moves as if under an
enchantment. Lily gave Daphne a suspicious look.

“What’s
going on Daff?”

“Going
on? I don’t—”

“Between
you and Finn. Something’s different. I can tell.”

“How?”

“The
way he looks at you. Like how he’s watching you right now. It’s like he’s in
his own world and you’re the only one in it.”

“Oh,
that. I don’t know Lily. He, uh, kissed me.”

“He
kissed you?” Lily was truly struck with awe.

“I
know what you’re going to say. I tried not to read too much into it. Spent all
day convincing myself that it wasn’t real, that he really doesn’t feel anything
for me. I know he’s a commitment phobe. I even tried pushing him away. But then
he did it again. Like he was trying to prove something to me.”

“Huh.”
Lily thought. “You know . . .” A grin crossed her face. “I’d never thought I’d
say this, but I think he may really be falling for you.”

“Stop,”
Daphne insisted. “I’m already freaking out as it is.”

“No,
really, Daff. You don’t know Finn like I do. When we were together he never
looked at me like that. And all that time he’s been spending with you . . . he
really likes you.”

Daphne
shook her head. “I don’t want to get hurt, Lily.”

“Neither
does he.”

Daphne
peered back at Finn. He
was
watching
her. His eyes looked hungry for her and Daphne turned back to Lily to hide her
blushing cheeks. She was terribly confused. She wanted to be with him and at
the same time it was the last thing she wanted. Like longing for something you
know you’ll never be able to keep. It was a simultaneous feeling of bliss and
dread. She needed to put him out of her mind.

Daphne
and Lily danced without a care in the world for what seemed like hours. At one
point Max came to dance drunkenly with them, but for the most part, the boys
stayed on the sidelines and watched. Daphne almost wished there were more girls
here for them to dance with. That is, until she noticed an unexpected visitor.

Belle
was standing in the corner with Finn. It seemed innocent enough, but Daphne
felt the stab of jealousy fall deep within her breast. Finn caught Daphne
looking and sent her a wink of reassurance. Still, she felt uneasy.

“What
is it?” Lily asked when she’d noticed Daphne’s stillness. She turned to see
what Daphne was looking at. “Oh. Sorry. I should have told you I invited her.”

“Why?
I thought she hated you too.”

“No,
not anymore. She’s actually really nice once you get past that tough, bitchy
exterior.”

“And
how exactly can I do that?”

Lily
made a face that suggested a friendship between Daphne and Belle would not be
on the schedule any time soon. “She won’t do anything to ruin the party. She
promised me.”

“Okay,
whatever.” Daphne left Lily and went over to the punch bowl. She was ready for
a stiff drink. Between her burgeoning feelings for Finn and her expanding
hatred of Belle, she needed to loosen up. The punch bowl was nearly empty,
courtesy of Josh and Max. She managed to pour about half a cup full and chug it
down.

“Great
party,” Shag said as he stood beside her.

“Yeah,”
was all Daphne could really get out, still distracted by Belle and Finn.

“You
wanna dance?”

“Not
really,” Daphne sighed apologetically. “I need a break.”

“I’ll
sit with you,” Shag volunteered.

Daphne
really just wanted to be alone. She’d have gone back to her own little cave and
gone to sleep if she could, but she couldn’t just leave Lily’s party. Shag
followed her to the pillows she had stacked against the wall. When she glanced
back at Finn, Daphne saw Belle look away abruptly, a sly smirk on her cheek.

“Hey,
we need more food!” Trick shouted. “And booze!”

“I’ll
get some,” Finn volunteered immediately. As he approached the tunnel Belle
followed him like a homeless puppy.

“No,
I will!” Lily said. “I need to use the restroom anyway.” Finn shrugged and
returned to his position on the wall. Daphne wished he would come sit with her,
but Belle was right back on him, refusing to give him up.

“So,
Daffy, how are you liking it here?” Shag asked as Daphne watched Lily disappear
into the tunnel.

“Huh?”

“You
like it here, right?” Shag repeated.

“Oh.”
Daphne snapped back to reality. “Yeah, it’s great.”

“I
know it’s kind of hard at first, not having any other home to go to and all,
but you get used to it.”

Daphne
tore her interest away from Finn and Belle. She didn’t want to be rude to Shag.
“So how did you end up here?”

“Hangman
recruited me. All of us kind of belonged to a group of boys who lived here at
the academy year-round. Some had parents who always travelled. Some had parents
who always worked and didn’t have time to waste on children, or hiring a nanny.
Some, like mine, simply didn’t care.”

“Your
parents must have cared to send you here. I know it costs a fortune in
tuition.”

“A
small price to pay compared to the cost of raising a troublesome child. Not to
mention the psychotherapy bills it also entails.”

Daphne
sighed audibly. “Some people were just not meant to have children.”

“Yeah,
tell me about it. So how bad were your parents?”

“Bad?”

“Well,
yeah. They must have been pretty horrible for you to end up here with us.”

Daphne
thought about her mom and dad. She realized she had hardly thought about them
at all over the past few weeks. She almost had a hard time picturing them. It
was like looking through a lens where you could only focus on certain features.
She could remember her mom’s eyes, but not her nose. The shape of her lips
stood out, but not their color. And her hair just seemed wrong. How did she
style it?

“Actually,
they weren’t
that
bad,” Daphne said, her
memory of that horrible night at the club faded like newsprint in the sunlight.
“At least not all the time. They were just always keeping me from seeing my
friends. Going out and stuff.”

“That
sucks,” Shag remarked. He inched his hand closer to Daphne’s on the floor. Soon
their hands were touching, but Daphne barely noticed. She was looking at Finn
and Belle again.

“Hey
Daffy?”

“Hmm?”
Shag swiftly drew his hand on top of hers startling her back into the present.

“Do
you want to get out of here? Maybe go down to the lake or something?”

The
lake. Daphne would love to go to the lake right now. With Finn. Daphne could
see the yearning in Shag’s eyes, begging her to come with him. But of course
she couldn’t. She didn’t like him in that way. In fact, she really didn’t know
much about him at all.

“Oh,
Shag,” she said, trying to buy time while she figured out how to let him down
gently. She slid her hand out from under his. “I don’t think that’s a good
idea. I threw this party for Lily and I need to be here for her.”

“I
get it,” Shag said, standing up. “You’re not really that into me.”

“I’m
really sorry.”

“No,
it’s cool. Just had to try.” Shag stammered off and now Daphne was left alone.
She watched Max try to attempt a break dance on the floor and decided it was
time to get him back to his dorm before he seriously injured himself. Plus it
gave her a good excuse to leave.

***

Lily
couldn’t remember if she had left the light on when she finished her evening
shift. She had intentionally stayed until the others left so that she could
sneak some of the party refreshments to the boys. Sure, it ruined the surprise,
but it wasn’t as if she didn’t know that they were throwing her a party.

She
moved silently through the aisles of shelves, picking off a few things that
nobody would notice missing: another bag of chips, a package of gingersnap
cookies, and some marshmallows. She dropped them on the counter next to the
sink and snuck into the main kitchen. The liquor was kept in a cabinet just
behind the walk-in refrigerator. Lucky for her, the kitchen staff trusted her
and never locked it. They never seemed to notice when bottles went
missing—the boys were stealthy in the way they stole things. Only things
that they knew wouldn’t be missed, like the cheap bottle of brandy that hadn’t
been replaced in six months.

The
hinges on the cabinet screamed in defiance as Lily opened the doors slowly.
Nine full bottles of alcohol stared back at her. This was the backup stash used
to replace empty bottles from the faculty dining room and lounge. She wouldn’t
dare try to steal from there—she lacked Finn’s bravado.

A
shadow hovered over Lily and the cabinet before she even heard the approach of
the three feet behind her. The cane
tap, tap, tapped
on the tile floor as she slowly pivoted around to
face the headmaster, who towered over her. His expression was a surprise to
her. Rather than looking angry or threatening, he wore a mask of vainglory. An
expression that gleamed hope and excitement, while whispering treachery.

“Well,
what have we here?” Trappe drawled in a high-pitched tone. “Stealing alcohol
from the faculty? And if I do remember correctly, you are quite underage, are
you not my dear?”

Lily
froze. Her head raced with a riptide of lies, but which to use? How could she
justify stealing a bottle of booze late in the night. None of the ideas that
came to her seemed logical or believable. He knew what she was up to. So she
simply clamped her mouth shut.

“A
little birdie tells me that you are here for your friends. Preston’s little
gang of outcasts. Such a shame that they’d make you do their dirty work on your
own birthday.”

“Nobody
makes
me do anything,” Lily hissed.

“Is
that so?”

Lily
stood her ground, squeezing her fists so tightly her stubby fingernails dug
rifts into the skin of her palms.

“Well,
then. I’ll be happy to know that you will give up Preston of your own accord.”