Read Never Surrender Online

Authors: Deanna Jewel

Never Surrender (4 page)

“Damn you, Taima. Do you think I’d actually try to
escape? Where would I go?”

“Saitii tahimahkaute en kai mananku namanukkiwa’iyu.”

An answering remark in his native tongue drifted back
to her, but Taima never turned around as he yanked her forward. She looked back
at Ahanu, who watched her with dancing eyes. A slight smile curved his mouth.

Taima continued on, obviously caring little about her
discomfort. Whenever she slowed, he would tug painfully on her wrist. Kate
glared at the back of his head, wishing he could feel the daggers her eyes must
be casting his way. If Taima thought to best her, then he certainly had his
work cut out for him. She would never surrender to his customs, but rather,
fight him every step of the way.

She again attempted to pull her wrist from Taima’s
grip. “You’ll not win at this game, you know. I’m stronger than I look, and
I’ll fight you at every turn!” He only returned the jerk as he repositioned the
deer pole on his right shoulder, never interrupting his stride.

Momentarily resigning herself to the situation, the
next half hour passed quietly as Kate tried to occupy her mind with the
breath-taking beauty of the mountains. From their position in the valley,
foothill bluebells and pink wild onion flowers interspersed with scarlet globe
mallow, knee-high grass, and sagebrush. The sweet smell of sagebrush assailed
her senses and she loved it. She gazed at the jagged, snow-covered mountains,
wishing she were running free through the pines--away from Taima and his
companion.

Now Taima dragged her up a slight incline.

From the top of the hill, a short distance down the
other side, she saw five open-faced lean-to dwellings that had been built near
a stream running along the lower basin. Tree limbs as thick as her arm formed
the lean-to’s top and sides, thatched with several pine boughs also on the top
and sides. Why didn’t these people use teepees?

Ten men sat about the various fires constructing bows
and arrows while women carried wood or knelt before hides staked to the ground,
viciously scraping the animal skins. Kate shuddered. How primitive. What year
could it possibly be?

Several small children played with dogs beyond the
lean-tos, their long, black hair secured with headbands. Four horses stood
beneath a copse of trees tethered to a rope. Did they not own more horses than
this, to service all these people?

As Kate walked down the hill beside Taima, two
warriors came forward to relieve him and Ahanu of the deer, but Taima’s grasp
on her wrist remained tight as he talked with two more warriors.

Conspicuous, hate-filled glances were directed at her,
but Kate held her head high, refusing to be intimidated by these savages.
Boldly, she held the men’s gazes. The women had stopped their scraping long
enough to glare at her, and then returned to their work as though it were an everyday
occurrence to drag a white woman into their camp.

One beautiful, young woman ran toward Ahanu, and he
embraced her. Two feathers painted blue and white hung from the leather
headband holding back her long, blue-black hair. Kate admired the blue and
white beads decorating the fringe of her supple doeskin dress. After the woman
inspected Ahanu, seemingly for wounds, she turned her attention on Kate, and
then glanced back to Ahanu. Her lips curled in a sneer as her eyes narrowed.
The woman glanced from Taima, to Kate, and then whispered to Ahanu.

He chuckled at whatever she’d said.

The conversation halted between Taima and the men
who’d joined him. His bright blue eyes traveled from the woman, to Kate and the
cold expression froze her heart.

Taima yanked her arm and flung her in the woman’s
direction. “U tsaya’a!”

Kate stumbled as she was flung toward Ahanu and his
woman. Taima spoke a command, and Ahanu motioned for Kate to follow her. Before
stepping away, Kate glanced back at Taima in time to see him look away. She
glared at his back. If only he could understand English!

When the woman tugged on her arm, Kate turned to
follow her toward one of the three-sided lean-tos where she indicated for her
to sit near the fire in front of the lean-to, which she did, thankful for the
reprieve away from that savage. A delicious smelling stew of some sort simmered
over the coals in a shallow metal pot. Remembering her history and judging from
the abundance of their supplies, Kate assumed these people obviously traded
well with the white man and other Indian tribes.

Kate watched Taima and Ahanu as they approached, then
glanced at the thatched dwelling. Through the open front of the lean-to, she
saw a massive, fur-covered buffalo hide lay neatly folded to one side.

The woman approached her and held out a stone plate
filled with food. As Kate reached for the offered food, the woman stared at the
cuts grazing Kate’s hands. The young woman’s gaze also traveled over her torn
sweatshirt, dirty jeans, and her boots as Kate realized how differently she
must look.

The woman examined her palms before meeting her gaze.

“I fell and tried to grab trees to hold onto, but they
only cut my hands.” Kate sighed. “Like you can understand me.”

The woman handed Kate the stone plate of food, which
she readily accepted. She plucked a succulent chunk of meat from the broth and
popped it into her mouth. It tasted wonderful.

The hairs on the back of her neck stood up as she
sensed being watched, and Kate immediately looked toward Taima. To her surprise,
she momentarily met his almost-caring blue gaze, making her think he might
almost be human. Then just as quickly, he turned back to the other warrior he’d
been talking to, as though he didn’t want her to know he kept a watch on her.
She wondered how long he’d been observing her, and why his gaze had suddenly
turned indifferent when she looked at him.

Frustrated and angry, Kate returned her attention to
eating, though she wished she held a burger and cola instead. She dipped a hard
biscuit into the tangy juice as she watched Taima’s people carry on with their
daily routines.

The few warriors Taima talked with began to disperse,
and Taima glanced over his shoulder at her with narrowed eyes. They made eye
contact for a brief moment then he looked at Ahanu, nodding his head for Ahanu
to join him. Without waiting for Ahanu to catch up, Taima strode away.

Kate wondered if Taima had a woman waiting at his
lean-to as Ahanu did. Watching Taima’s back as he walked away, she mulled over
the thought and licked the last remains of broth from her fingers. When Ahanu
finally caught up with him, the two stopped and knelt to speak with an old man.

Finished with her food, though she still watched
Taima, Kate handed the plate to the woman, who glanced in Taima’s direction,
then back at Kate. The angry look in her narrowed eyes needed no words.

Did this woman think she wanted Taima?

“Oh  no! It’s definitely not what you’re thinking.
That savage may not have tortured me but…” She pointed her hand in Taima’s
direction. “…he is just as guilty. If it weren’t for him forcing me to come
here, I’d be on my way back east to Pittsburgh by now.”

The suspicious look never left the woman’s face as she
took Kate’s plate and Kate watched the children, who played in the meadow
behind the lean-tos, their laughter carrying on the wind. Remembering her own
friends at home, Kate thought this group seemed as though they were like a
small family, each helping the other with small chores such as gathering wood,
making bows and arrows, or tanning hides. One woman instructed the others on
the use of a sharp, rounded object. Kate wondered at the type of tool the women
used to scrape the hides since they appeared to be making a quick job of it
despite the primitive manner they used.

Kate sniffed and looked back at her hand. A rancid
odor met Kate’s nose as a warm ointment stung the wounds on her hands and Kate
stiffened.  “What is that?”

The woman gave a native reply, again one of which she
couldn’t understand.

 

* * * * *

 

Keeping his gaze trained ahead of him, Taima strode
past a group of giggling young girls, wishing Ahanu would catch up with him. He
needed to talk with Sakima and inform him of Kate’s presence and why she was
here, though the older man had probably seen her arrival in one of his visions.
Sakima’s knowledge always seemed to astound Taima. For one individual to know
so much of what the spirit gods sent their way proved fact enough that Sakima
was their chosen shaman.

He sat cross-legged before a fire, wrapped in a
buffalo hide. Wise beyond his fifty summers, Sakima’s dark eyes met Taima’s.
Their gazes never broke as Taima sat across from him at the fire, next to
Ahanu. The three sat in silence for a long time.

“You are troubled, my son.”

Taima looked into the fire, then poked at the glowing
embers with a stick. “Noshi...father...capturing the white woman has disturbed
memories I would rather not dwell on.”

“Sometimes the spirits know more than we do. Perhaps
they think it is time you
did
dwell on your memories. Perhaps now, it is
time to think of the past again.”

Taima gazed into the older warrior’s profound, dark
eyes, not wanting to stir his own painful thoughts. “Noshi, please . . .”

The shaman nodded slowly. “Nechan...my son...I, too,
have memories of your mother. She came to mean more than life to me. But from
the Great Spirits, I’ve learned we must often face the past in order to carry
on into our future.”

Taima sighed and stared at the early stars. “Have your
Great Spirits advised you how to deal with the sorrow of dredging up what’s better
left in the past?” He glanced back at his father, trying to read his thoughts
through the seasoned dark eyes that gazed back at him.

“Yes, Nechan...and you will always feel a tug on your
heart whenever you think of your wife or mother. But you have dealt with these
emotions before and though our group here is small, our people look to you for
strength and guidance. You’ve never disappointed them in this task. Now it is
your turn; learn to pull strength from those around you.”

This time, Ahanu poked the fire with a twig. Taima
watched the tip dig through the glowing embers, feeling his heart burn with
pain, as though the coals were within his chest.

He fought against the memories that never disappeared
from his thoughts. The vision of his slender wife, her dark eyes gazing from a
delicate, oval face, never disappeared from his mind’s eye or the memory of her
hair’s silkiness when he ran his fingers through its length, nor the softness
of her warm, naked flesh against his own. His heart ached to be with her,
something he wished for daily. Because of the white man, he would never again
see or touch her...and he could not allow a white woman to replace those
thoughts and memories.

The white man had also robbed him of a mother with
more tenderness and spirit than three women put together. Her loving blue eyes
would forever haunt his dreams.

The fire before him blurred as Taima blinked away the
tears that threatened to fall.

Kate was white...and beautiful, but that was not her
fault, and he honestly couldn’t hate her for it. What he did not want was to
fall in love with her, to have her memory invade his thoughts. Those tender
thoughts were reserved only for his wife. He knew he couldn’t be around Kate
but to release her into the wilderness after the raid would have been the same
as murder.

Ahanu’s wife, Aiyana, could see to her training. Kate
would be a needed worker, one to help with the meat and hides of the coming
hunt. She would be kept too busy to cause anyone problems, especially him.

“Your anger and hatred are easily read in your eyes,
Nechan. You must learn to control your emotions. I, too, am angry at the white
man for taking my woman from me.” His father paused a moment before continuing.
“How are you going to deal with this new woman?”

Chapter Four

 

Surprised by his father’s question, Taima quickly
glanced up. “Why must I deal with her
at all
? I’ve given her to Ahanu.
She is his to do with as he pleases. I care not what happens to her.”

Ahanu looked up from the fire. “Then why did you bring
her here?”

Taima glanced at his friend. “I captured her from a
Blackfoot warrior. I couldn’t release her after that. She never would have
survived alone in the wilderness.”

Ahanu raised a brow. “But you just said you didn’t
care what happened to her.”

Tossing his stick into the fire, Taima growled, “Must
I take her out and kill her to prove she matters little to me?”

Sakima only stared at him, then spoke in a calm voice.
“The spirits have their reasons for allowing things to happen. Perhaps right
now, none of us will understand why the white woman is among us, but when the
time is right, the Great Spirits will reveal their purpose.”

“Noshi, you have been right in many things, but I feel
this incident is not one of them. Some things happen without reason.”

Sakima pulled the buffalo hide tighter around his
shoulder, and stared at Taima long moments before speaking. His eyes squinted
and his mouth pursed in concentration. The lines of many summers etched their
messages in the worn face. Though a stern look could stop one in mid-step, he
knew of the gentleness his father bestowed on others.

Then his father gazed into the fire. “All things
happen for a reason, just as the white woman’s coming has a reason. In time,
the spirits will reveal their answers. Now...Ahanu should join his family.”

Without moving his gaze from the fire, Taima’s father
had dismissed him. Knowing Sakima could hear the spirits better when he sat
alone before the fire, Taima rose in one fluid motion and strode away with
Ahanu. Ahanu walked toward his lean-to, but Taima walked up into the hills. He
needed time to be alone and think about what his father had said.

 

* * * * *

 

Kate sighed in relief when Aiyana finally finished
spreading the ointment into her hands. Early evening settled around them and
the breeze began to cool. Aiyana stepped into the lean-to, then returned with a
soft, doeskin dress that she thrust toward her and motioned Kate to change.

Inside Aiyana’s lean-to, Kate slipped the new dress
over her head, wincing in agony as it slid down her back. Pain shot through her
body like an electrical storm from the mere raising of her arms. Hitting those
trees today would surely leave her aching for days.

God, why was she here!
There had to be some logical explanation for all
this. None of it made any sense.
Then she remembered the petroglyphs, how
her hands stuck to the boulder, then blackness. She nearly laughed out loud.
Since time travel didn’t actually happen, there had to be another explanation
and she would find out what.

Stepping around the curtained enclosure, Kate saw
Ahanu sitting before the fire talking with the woman as she prepared the
evening meal. Taima was nowhere in sight, and a rush of air escaped her lungs
as she sighed with relief, unaware till then that she’d held her breath. The woman
scowled at her, so she quickly looked away. If Taima wasn’t here, then where
was he? She glanced into the shadows surrounding the other lean-tos. His people
milled about, but still she could glimpse no sign of Taima.

When she returned her attention to Ahanu, he already
watched her. Another smile cut across his face, then he, too, looked about the
camp. Returning his gaze to hers, still smiling, he shrugged his shoulders and
raised his eyebrows.

Disgusted at being so obvious, Kate fisted her
fingers. “Don’t you think, for one minute, that I care where that savage is!
Because I don’t.”

Ahanu shrugged his shoulders again as the woman
giggled, then turned her attention to the noisy children running toward them.
She crouched down and held out her arms to a little girl, who ran into the
embrace and hugged her. Five young boys jumped onto Ahanu. He rolled about the
ground as they attacked him like playful pups, laughing when they got the best
of him. The little girls stood giggling, watching the boys tease Ahanu.

Kate smiled as she watched the children play. They
appeared to be delightful youngsters. When Ahanu put an end to the playful
attack, the boys turned their attention on Kate--the stranger in their midst.

Each one’s personality differed from the others; Kate
could see that right away. Some lowered their gazes; some stared at her with
open interest. The last little boy to leave Ahanu’s side glanced over toward
the other lean-tos, and then looked at Kate.

She gasped in surprise.

The bright curiosity that glowed behind the little
boy’s blue eyes shocked her--as much as when she looked into the eyes of his
father. She knew he could only be one man’s son--the one man whose very
presence created havoc within her body, making every muscle tighten in her
stomach, her heart to beat out of control, and her lungs to nearly collapse.

She had yet to figure out his connection to her dream
of the Indian.

The child glanced toward the lean-tos again, and this
time, Kate’s gaze followed his. The fearful sight that drew her attention
weakened her knees. Kate’s breath caught in her throat, yet she stood her
ground.

Taima strode toward her.

He wore a look of defiance, as though he expected her
to confront him. The blueness of his eyes stood out even more when his ire
rose. Kate began to think he was always angry since that’s the only mood he’d
exhibited these last few days.

Because of her? If so, why had he bothered rescuing
her during the raid?

His gaze reverted to the boy beside her, and he
approached with outstretched arms. The child ran to him and wrapped his little
arms around his father’s neck. The tenderness he bestowed on his son surprised
Kate as she watched in awe. Taima smiled, lighting his boyish features as he
cradled the child upon his arm. The boy fondled a feather dangling from his
father’s headband. A quiet conversation took place between father and child,
then they both laughed.

Taima joined Ahanu, his wife and their other children
who climbed all over the men to play as they sat down. Kate hid herself within
the lean-to, watching the exchange of friends and family. Sadness seeped into
her heart to think she no longer had anyone to share even the smallest amount
of joy.

When one of the children squealed in delight, Taima
joined in their laughter. Kate peered from the door of the lean-to to watch the
playful bantering. Taima’s wide smile enhanced his features even more. Ruffling
a child’s hair, his gaze lifted to meet hers.

The smile immediately shed from his face like the skin
of a snake. Her heart ached to think she could be the cause of so much hatred
and turned toward the lean-to’s interior, once again hiding herself within the
shadows. Stepping to a vacant corner, she squatted on her heels, and toyed with
the soft leather fringe on her dress. A sense of loneliness consumed her, and
tears gathered in her eyes as she tried not to listen to their happy chatter.

Frustrated that Taima had so easily made her cry with
a single scathing look, Kate bit her lower lip to cease the quivering. She
couldn’t think of anything she’d done to deserve this treatment.

Tiny fingers touched the dampness on Kate’s cheek. She
looked up to see a little girl’s sad face.

“E himpa’aute yakkai?” The child glanced at her wet
fingers, then slowly touched Kate’s cheek again. Such an act of innocence
tugged a smile from Kate, causing the tiny fingers to touch her lips.

“Kai saikka taipo wa’ippea masunaite!” Taima’s deep,
stern voice sent the child scampering away. Kate leaned forward around the
corner to meet Taima’s gaze; whatever he’d said made the child run to Aiyana’s
side.

Furious that he’d frightened the little girl, Kate
stormed toward him, tears still blurring her vision. He stood to confront her,
but she didn’t allow his scathing glare and size to intimidate her.

Not this time.

Fury burned her eyes and gave her strength. “How dare
you! You might frighten a child with your savage ways, but I don’t frighten so
easily!”

With a swiftness she hadn’t expected, Taima gripped
her upper arms painfully, pulling her hard against his chest.

“Perhaps...I need to change my treatment of you, White
Woman. Maybe then, my savage ways just might be more to your liking.”

Kate gasped.

Shock weakened her knees and it’s a good thing he held
onto her so tight.

The clearly spoken English splashed over her like a
bucket of cold water. Taima’s icy-blue eyes glared into hers.

Utter stillness fell over the camp.

“What? No more angry words?” His fingers dug into her
arms as he shook her. “Does your silence mean you accept things
my
way?
Although, I doubt very much I can put aside my hatred for your people long
enough to bed you.”

“You bastard!” She struggled within his grasp, but he
held tight, his body heat penetrating her leather dress, reeling her senses.

“Or does the fact that I’m a half-breed disgust you,
as it does the rest of your race?”

His warm breath fanned her cheek. His musky, male
scent drifted to her nose. Memories of the stranger, who wore the long duster,
staring at her in the streets of Dubois, again invaded her mind. Then those
same feelings from her dream coursed through her, though she didn’t want to
accept that this arrogant man had any connection to either event.

“The fact that you’re Indian turns my stomach. You’re
no different from the savages who scalped those people in that raid, who left
me alone in this God-forsaken wilderness.”


I
didn’t kill anyone. But the Blackfoot tribe
takes pride in murder, unlike ours.”

The muscles along his jaw line twitched. The searing
hatred Kate saw in his eyes nearly burned her. Was his hate directed toward her
or to the Blackfoot tribe who murdered the whites? She couldn’t figure out why
he would be so angry with
her
.

She clenched her teeth. “Let go of me.”

Taima released her so quickly she stumbled backward.
Catching her balance, she spun around to stare at Ahanu. “I suppose you could
understand me all along, too?”

Ahanu shrugged. “It was not my place to tell you
otherwise.”

Kate glanced at the frightened woman. “And I suppose
you also speak English?”

Aiyana nodded.

Turning his back on Kate, Taima returned to sit beside
his son at the fire. She stared at his back with contempt, then met Ahanu’s
gaze over Taima’s shoulder. His dark eyebrow rose; a smirk crossed his face.

Kate’s heart raced from the anger raging through her
veins, her breathing labored. Furious, she clenched her fists and turned on her
heel, running toward the horses beyond the copse of pine. She made her way in
the near dark, passing others eating their evening meal, or enjoying a joke. No
one paid her any attention. The rapid beat of her heart kept pace with her
pounding feet.

How dare Taima deceive her, making her look the fool?
The wind whipped her hair behind her. The cool
evening air helped soothe the burning anger that coiled within her body. He had
dealt with her for the last time. She would save him the trouble of getting rid
of her. Capturing her still made no sense if he hated the white man.
Why
even bother with her?

Though dusk settled around her, she could still see
the treacherous rocks and fallen timber in her path on the way to find a horse
to escape with.

A copse of pine trees grew just ahead. Soon she would
be hidden safely within their cover, away from Taima forever. Warm tears ran
down her cheek. Why had he bothered with her in the first place?

Reaching the horses, she quickly untied one, and hiked
up her leather dress to mount. She gripped the dark mane in her fingers as she
pulled herself onto the animals back.

 

* * * * *

 

Taima wrapped an arm around his son to reassure him
everything was fine after his confrontation with Kate, while Ahanu played
noisily with his daughter. A few moments later, a silent Aiyana drew Taima’s
attention. She sat beside him with downcast eyes, yet she glanced at Ahanu.
Suspicious, Taima narrowed his eyes on Ahanu. His irritating, lopsided grin and
slight chuckle nearly unseated Taima. Ahanu grasped his daughter, stifling her
laughter with the palm of his hand.

Quickly glancing around for Kate, Taima saw only her
blanket lying in a heap where she’d sat earlier.

His eyes widened in rage as he stared at Ahanu. “Tell
me you didn’t allow her to escape while we sat right here? And don’t shrug your
shoulders like you don’t know, damn you, Ahanu.”

“Since you ignored her, so did I. It wasn’t my place
to tell you how to treat your prisoner.”

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