Read My Song for You: A Pushing Limits Novel Online
Authors: Stina Lindenblatt
My phone pinged from my purse as I drove down the interstate from San Francisco. My heart
thump-thump-thump
ed a fast pace the entire way, and it had nothing to do with my family dying on this same road.
My heart was racing me back to L.A. solely because of Jared.
He and the band were leaving next week for their promo blitz tour, and then, according to their announcement three hours ago, they were opening for Endless Motion’s extensive U.S. tour. If I didn’t tell him soon how I felt, it would be a while before I got to tell him face-to-face.
The sun had long since disappeared below the horizon when I arrived at Jared’s building. I parked my car, jogged to the front door, and buzzed his apartment. No one answered. Hailey had told me the band was flying back home tonight after the show. I hadn’t thought to ask her when exactly they were due to land.
There was no guarantee he was even coming straight home, but it was a chance I had to take.
I sat on a nearby bench. The area was well lit and the neighborhood decent, but that didn’t stop my body from switching to fight-and-flight mode at the sounds sneaking up on me—every rustle of the leaves, every footstep, every car engine that hummed past.
I reached into my purse. My hand brushed against the velvet box next to my phone.
Jared had texted,
Thinking about you
.
How are you?
His words warmed me on the inside, a marshmallow in hot chocolate. By now he would know that I hadn’t stuck around to see him perform. He didn’t know I had actually watched him—and realized how big an idiot I’d been for not seeing it sooner. He loved me like I loved him. That thought, along with a gallon of coffee, had kept me awake on the long drive home.
I removed the velvet box from my purse and opened it. The silver glinted in the glow from the streetlight behind me. I fingered the fine chain and the silver guitar pick, a symbol of my love for him.
After the band left the TV station, I told Samantha something had come up and I needed to return to L.A. I left her place and drove straight to a nearby mall, where I bought the pendant for Jared.
I pulled my hoodie around me, and thanked God we lived in L.A. and not Chicago. Otherwise I’d’ve been sitting there in a winter coat and still shivering.
A car door slammed shut. I glanced down the path to the road. A cab was parked there, but that wasn’t what caused the air in my lungs to pause.
The dark-haired, dimpled guitarist standing there with his gaze locked on me was the one to blame for the way my lungs had temporarily ceased functioning. He walked slowly toward me, as if certain I was nothing more than an illusion that might vanish in a puff of smoke if he moved any faster.
During the drive from San Francisco, I’d been busy deciding what I would say to him. Some attempts had been witty. Others had been the equivalent of three Kleenex boxes of emotional. There was even the version where I got down on my knee and proposed to him.
But after spending hours practicing exactly what I longed to say, I forgot it all the moment he stepped out of the cab. Instead, I closed the distance between us, gazed at his heart-melting eyes for a second, then crashed my lips against his…and let everything I had to tell him be revealed through the kiss.
His arms wrapped around my waist and he pulled me closer. All those practiced words in my head meant nothing, truth be told. But this—the kiss, the way he held me, the love between us—was perfect. Any doubts I might have had? Evaporated.
Eventually I shifted away and rested my forehead against his. Our breaths came fast and hard, and it took a minute for me to slow my breathing enough for me to utter the words I did need to say. His arms remained around my waist. My hands stayed threaded in his hair.
“Jared Michael Leigh.” My voice was soft but certain. “Will you marry me?”
A slow, sexy smile curled onto his full, kissable lips. “Yes, I would love to.”
And then we were kissing again…until kissing wasn’t enough.
How we made it upstairs with all our clothes still on was beyond me, but they certainly didn’t stay on once we entered his apartment. Somewhere between the front door and his bed, my shoes, socks, jeans, and T-shirt had left my body. His clothes had suffered the same fate.
Jared kissed me again, but this time the kisses were gentle and unassuming. Which was funny given our state of undress. If anything, you’d have thought we’d be ravishing each other at this point.
That’s not to say I didn’t want to. Eventually.
I smiled against his lips. “I love you, Jared. I’ve been in love with you since I was seventeen. I don’t think I ever stopped loving you.” I brushed my mouth against his and continued along his jaw. The stubble there teased the tip of my tongue as I forged a path to below his ear. I gently nipped him. His answering moan stirred me. And the mere thought of what he could do to my body almost had me coming in my panties.
“God, I’ve missed you,” he murmured against my ear. “And I’m not saying that because I’m about to make love to you.”
Good thing I was holding on to him, because my knees gave way at his words. “I’ve missed you too. More than you can possibly imagine.”
He tenderly traced his fingers down my arm. “Are we going to be okay? I mean, when I go on tour?” Hope filled his beautiful brown eyes.
I smiled and caressed his face, the movement soft but reassuring. “I know we will. I’m not saying it’ll be easy, but as long as we trust each other, we’ll be fine.”
That gave him the measure of reassurance he needed, and with it came the kisses I craved. His mouth devoured mine, his tongue creating havoc against my own. He guided me back onto the bed. His fiery gaze consumed me, igniting the heat between my legs.
He cupped his hand against my cheek, then with a feathery touch he trailed his fingers down my neck and between my breasts, still encased in the white lace bra. Every cell in my body buzzed with energy, with desire.
His fingers continued down my stomach, pausing a moment so he could kiss the skin above my belly button. His teeth lightly grazed the place he’d kissed. I moaned at the delicious sensation.
His hands resumed their journey to my panties. Less than a minute later, I was free of them. They disappeared over the edge of his bed. Jared’s boxer briefs joined them soon after.
Underwear—it was so overrated.
Jared’s fingers went on to create magic between my legs. They slipped between my folds and teased the supercharged core, pushing me closer to the edge with each brush of my clit.
I wrapped my fingers around his thick length and almost moaned. Yes, I had missed this too. I swirled my thumb against the tip, spreading the small amount of pre-cum around the velvety surface.
Jared sucked in a sharp breath, then reached for a foil package from the top drawer of his nightstand. He ripped it open and rolled the condom down his length. But instead of positioning himself between my legs, he beckoned me off the bed.
He propped the pillows against the headboard and leaned back against them, then indicated for me to straddle his legs. Before I could position myself over him, he placed his hand against my waist to stop me, and reached around to undo my bra. It too joined the party on the floor.
Jared leaned forward and took my nipple into his sweet, warm mouth. His wet tongue circled it, then he sucked it to a stiff peak.
Holy mother of all things amazing, this man is certainly talented with his tongue.
I moaned, the sound not even beginning to convey how I felt.
Once he was finished, a satisfied grin on his face, I slowly lowered myself until he was seated deep inside me. I didn’t know where I started and where he ended—and I didn’t care. All I cared about was how my soft heat hugged his hard length.
Jared rested his hand on my hips, guiding my movements and the pace. Like the kiss earlier, it was slow and sweet, as was the build-up to the peak. He kept his eyes, now dark with want, focused on me, adding to the intensity of the moment. He’d told me he wanted to make love to me, and that was exactly what he was doing.
But then came a point where I didn’t crave slow anymore. I wanted to race to the peak, and I wanted to do it with Jared.
Sensing the new urgency, he increased the pace, my hips rising and plunging. It didn’t take much, and before I knew it, my entire body shuddered as euphoria swept through me. Jared joined me soon after.
As the realization of what we had just done filled me with a new level of love, I cuddled up to Jared.
“When I’m on the road,” Jared said, caressing my lower back, “if you start having doubts about us, I want you to remember how I just made love to you.” He brushed his lips against mine in a sweet and satisfying kiss.
I kissed him back, then smiled softly. “I know we’re going to make it.”
And I did. Jared possessed so much love. I had seen it with his friends, his bandmates, and his family, and I had seen it with Logan. I had no doubts whatsoever that we could make this work. No, it wouldn’t be easy, but if I ever doubted myself and what we had, he was right—I just had to remember tonight.
“By the way,” I said, “I loved the song.” I kissed him gently. “That, and how you sang it even though you don’t like being the front man. That’s how I know how much you love me.” I lightly stroked his chest above his heart. “I don’t suppose you’re going to make me a copy so that whenever I miss you, I can listen to it?”
“I think that can be arranged. I’m not sure how the label will feel about it, though.” He winced. “They had no clue we were going to do that.”
I gave him another feather-light kiss. “It doesn’t matter what they believe. You didn’t write the song for them. You wrote it for the woman who believes you’re the most wonderful man around. I never want you to forget that. Besides, I’m positive they’ll love the song. How could they not?”
I didn’t let him answer; I just kissed him long and hard. Which progressed into another round of lovemaking, only this time it was rougher and more heated—and equally satisfying, both inside and out.
“Where did you go after you left Logan at my parents’?” he asked, once we had recovered. He shifted so we were facing each other and caressed my arm.
“To San Francisco. To the university. I wanted to talk to them about transferring to the illustration department. I realized you were right. I don’t want to give up on being an animator, and being a graphic designer just isn’t doing it for me. I love creating pictures for kids, and I wanted to talk to a friend who had graduated from that program.” Which I did before I left Samantha’s party.
“So does this mean we’re moving to San Francisco?” The look on his face told me he would willingly do it in a heartbeat, band be damned, if that was what I wanted.
I shook my head. “I can do it online. Although if Hailey gets accepted into the physical therapy program there, I suspect we’ll be going to San Francisco anyway.” I wouldn’t complain if that happened. Hailey was my friend now.
He smirked. “You’re probably right about that.”
Talking about San Francisco suddenly reminded me of what I’d forgotten the moment I saw Jared by the cab. “I have something for you. Stay here.” I climbed off the bed and walked into the hallway. I didn’t bother to gather up our clothes, strewn along the beige carpet. I searched through my purse, found what I was looking for, and returned to his room.
He was still lying in bed when I climbed back under the covers, holding the velvet box with the pendant inside. I opened it and removed the silver guitar pick. On it was a small engraved heart with the words
I’D PICK YOU EVERY TIME
.
“Usually when a guy proposes, he gives a ring,” I said, “but I wasn’t sure what the protocol was when the person proposing is a woman. I want you to have this so that when you’re touring, you’ll always have a piece of me with you.”
Jared took it from me and smiled. “Have I mentioned that I love you?”
“You might have mentioned it once or twice while we were making love.”
“Good. Because I do.” He reached under his pillow. “And I have something for you.” He opened his fist, revealing the engagement ring in his palm. “Will you, Callie Louisa Talbert, be my wife?”
The smile on my face could have lit up the entire street during a power outage. “I will.”
S
IX
M
ONTHS
L
ATER
I kneeled in front of Logan in the room that once had belonged to me but had since been converted into a guest room. My son was even more adorable than normal, dressed in his black tuxedo. “How do I look?” I asked.
Normally I wasn’t one to dress up in a tux. None of the guys in the band were. Jeans and T-shirts were our outfit of choice. But even though Callie had told me she didn’t care what I wore today, I had insisted the guys and Logan dress up.
“You look great, Daddy. What about me?”
My heart pounding from excitement, not nerves, I straightened his tie. The tuxes were black, the vests and ties bronze. “You look great too. I think Mommy’s going to approve of us both.”
Logan grinned, revealing the new gap where he was missing his bottom front tooth. The tooth fairy had paid him a visit last night. It was one of those milestones I’d been lucky enough to witness. Fortunately, Endless Motion had scheduled a week off due to some other obligations. It wasn’t enough time for a honeymoon, but it allowed enough time for Callie and me to have one night together alone, and for me to spend more time with her and Logan as a family. Callie’s adoption of Logan had gone through last week. In the eyes of the court, she was now his legal mother.
I stood up. “And you have the rings?” I asked Nolan, my best man.
He chuckled. “Yep, just like I did the last five times you asked me. Don’t worry, everything is gonna be okay.”
“Unless she’s changed her mind,” Mason not-so-helpfully added.
I scowled at him.
His hands went up in surrender. “Hey, just kidding. I might not be the settling-down type, but I can tell that what you and Callie have is solid.”
Logan looked at him with a hopeful expression, waiting for Mason to accidentally curse. With us away on tour, his swear jar was woefully empty.
The bedroom door opened and my father poked his head into the room. “We’re ready.”
“So Callie hasn’t bailed yet?” Mason said.
Kirk cuffed him on the back of his head.
“What the fuck did you do that for?” he said to Kirk, then without missing a beat, he turned to Logan. “I’ll give you the money after the ceremony.”
Logan grinned back at him. While the bulky drummer might’ve intimidated some people, Logan just saw him as Uncle Mason, the man who was bankrolling Logan’s future aspirations.
My father took his grandson’s hand and led him to my parents’ bedroom, where the women were getting ready. I hadn’t seen Callie since arriving home last night from touring. She’d stayed at her apartment. Logan and I had stayed with my parents. It took everything I had not to enter the room and kiss her, to throw away the tradition of not seeing the bride before the wedding.
Okay, knowing what the three women with Callie would’ve done to me might have also had something to do with my decision not to break tradition.
The guys and I headed outside to the gazebo. Two simple yet rustic flower arrangements—created from sticks, white gauze, and fall flowers—were attached to either side of the entrance. A couple dozen folding seats, covered in white fabric, faced the wooden structure. Family and friends currently occupied the chairs.
Standing in front of the gazebo entrance was a friend of Aaron’s in a gray tuxedo. Richard was an ordained minister and had been happy to take part in the ceremony. I shook hands with him and took my place.
A movement at the kitchen door grabbed my attention. I looked over, as did everyone seated in the chairs. Because of Logan’s cochlear implant, we had forgone the usual music. We wanted him to hear the ceremony.
Kristen stepped from the house first, holding Emma’s hand and a small bouquet of red, orange, and yellow flowers. Her strapless dress was light green and simple, revealing her six-month baby bump. Emma, though, was the one who stole the show in her lacy white dress. A bronze sash had been tied around her waist, and she was carrying a small basket of flower petals.
As they drew closer, Emma let go of her mother’s hand and toddled over to me. “Hi.” She offered me the basket.
Soft laughter rippled through the audience. I bent down and hugged her. “You’re the most beautiful flower girl I know.”
She grinned.
Kristen stepped up to the gazebo, and Emma lifted her arms above her head. “Up.”
“Go see Daddy,” Kristen said, pointing to Craig, who was in the front row. Emma joined him, and he hoisted her onto his lap.
Next was Hailey. She stepped out the back door, and a quick glance at Nolan told me he wouldn’t be noticing any other woman, including Callie, for the rest of the day. I wouldn’t be surprised if by the end of the year he and Hailey were planning for
their
wedding.
Hailey’s dress, with two thin straps at the shoulders, ended above her knees and was a darker shade of green than Kristen’s outfit. Black lace accented the body-skimming dress, and Hailey’s long brown hair lay loose around her shoulders. It was easy to understand why Nolan was mesmerized.
Logan was with her and was carrying the ring-bearer’s pillow Mom had sewn for the wedding. Hailey spoke to him, he nodded, and they walked hand in hand down the makeshift aisle. Hailey’s gaze was locked on Nolan the entire time.
Whispering came from behind me. Aaron and Kirk were no doubt betting on when Hailey and Nolan would be getting hitched. I was sure there would be no complaints from Mason if it was sooner rather than later…assuming Nolan went for the stripper bachelor party I had vetoed when Mason had suggested it for me. I had a feeling Nolan would veto the idea too. No other woman would do for him, like no other woman could outshine Callie for me—but try explaining that to Mason.
Logan stepped up to the gazebo, and I hugged him. “You did great,” I said, signing it at the same time. I wasn’t the only one who had been learning sign language. My bandmates had also been learning it while we toured.
“You rock,” Mason signed to Logan.
Logan grinned and signed the same thing back to him. My heart warmed at how supportive the guys in the band were of me being a father. I didn’t know what I would have done without them.
Logan joined my mother and Sharon in the front row. Mom helped him onto his seat between the two women.
Callie appeared in the doorway…and I became suddenly weak in the knees—in a good way. Hailey was beautiful, but nothing compared to the goddess standing at the kitchen door with my father. Her copper hair, shining in the late afternoon sun, like flames in a campfire, flowed in loose waves over her shoulders and down her back. Lace covered her sleeveless white dress, which skimmed the gorgeous curves I’d been craving while touring. The skirt gently flared below the hips and formed a short train behind her.
Her gaze caught mine and I imagined her inhaling sharply. Although I could tell she wanted to race down the aisle and jump into my arms, she walked slowly toward me. My lungs paused, forgetting to suck in air, but who required air anyway? Touching, holding, kissing Callie was so much more important.
After what felt like way too long, Callie stepped up to me. “Hey,” she said, her voice soft. How I kept from pulling her head to mine and devouring her with kisses was beyond me. I hadn’t seen her for two months, when she and Logan had joined the band for a few days on the road. Other than that, we had talked daily via Skype. But Skype was nothing like having the real flesh-and-blood woman in your arms. Every inch of me had ached to have her back there again while we were away.
“Hi,” I said, finding my voice.
Callie handed her flowers to Hailey and I took her hands in mine. They were even softer than I’d remembered.
“Jared Leigh and Callie Talbert, we’re gathered here today in front of friends and family to celebrate the joining of your lives. In both good times and in bad, you’ll stand by each other, stronger together in body and soul.” Richard continued talking, but his words were a blur, my attention solely on Callie.
Nolan handed him the wedding rings.
“Jared and Callie have written their own vows.” He passed me Callie’s ring.
I slipped it onto her finger and gazed into her beautiful blue eyes, shiny with love. “Callie Louisa Talbert, until you stepped back into my life, I had no idea what love really meant. I loved my family, but I had never loved with the level of passion that I feel for you. You’re my everything. My sun on a rainy day. The warmth in my soul. The inspiration behind every breath I take. I couldn’t imagine spending a day without you by my side. And while I know it’s not always easy with the distance often between us, you’re constantly in my thoughts and in my heart. You’re the one who keeps me grounded and keeps me real and helps me be the man I strive to be. You’re the one I want to grow old with. Do you take me to be your husband?” I slid the ring into place.
She smiled. “I do.” Her gaze dropped to my lips for a heartbeat, and I had to battle the urge to kiss her. She took the other ring and slipped it onto the end of my finger. “Jared Michael Leigh, we’ve been friends for as long as I can remember. First I loved you as a friend, and then I fell in love with you. My love for you has grown brighter with each passing day as I’ve watched you become the amazing, talented man that you are. You’ve encouraged me to follow my dreams like you followed your own. You helped me believe in myself like I believe in you. I see the love you have for your music and for your bandmates and for your family, and it makes me love you so much more. There’s no one else I could imagine growing old with. Do you take me as your wife?” She slipped the ring fully onto my finger.
“You better believe I do!” I said with a grin.
“By the power vested in me,” Richard announced, “I pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”
I didn’t need to be told twice. I cupped Callie’s cheek and stroked my thumb against the face I’d missed so much. Yes, Skype had nothing on this.
I kissed her, the gentle touching of lips that conveyed everything I felt in that simple gesture. Everyone cheered. My bandmates patted me on the back, and Nolan gave me a wry grin. At least he had been able to make love to Hailey last night; I still had to wait a few more hours before Callie was all mine.
I threaded my fingers with hers—and decided to screw the waiting. I had no intention of it being that long before I snuck a few stolen moments with my wife.
And God, did it feel fucking great thinking of her that way. She was my wife, my lover, my best friend, the mother of my son. We had experienced both the highs and the lows, and I wasn’t naive to believe that we’d seen the end of them. Touring posed challenges that people with regular jobs never faced, but I was confident we would make it. If things became too much, for the sake of my son and my marriage, I would gladly walk away from the band if I had to. Because as much as I loved the music, I loved Callie and Logan that much more.
As soon as the last person had offered congratulations, I led Callie to the tree house. She grinned, the playful woman that I loved so much making it clear she was all for my plan. She slipped off her shoes, bunched up the hem of her dress, and climbed the ladder. I followed right behind, helping her up.
Once inside and away from prying eyes, my mouth was on hers again. This time there were no gentle kisses. No promises of what was to come. There was just this moment, this connection, this love.
“I missed you,” I said in her ear once I stopped kissing her long enough to speak, my voice rough.
“I missed you too, but I wouldn’t change anything.” She laid her hand on my chest, where the silver guitar pick rested. “I’d pick you every time. No matter what.”
“And I’d pick you every time too.” I removed my jacket, vest, and tie. Then I unbuttoned my shirt.
“As much as I want to make love to you,” she whispered, “I’m not sure this is the place to do it, with everyone in your parents’ backyard waiting for us.” She laughed, and the sweet sound almost did me in. Damn, I had missed that laugh. “Though that doesn’t mean I’ll complain if you remove your shirt.”
And to prove it, she helped me with the rest of the buttons. Her gaze remained locked on mine as she slowly slipped each button through its hole. Her fingers caressed my exposed skin. An electrical charge hummed through my body at her touch. I was close to ripping off the offending piece of clothing just so I could feel her skin against mine that much sooner.
Once the final button was free, Callie slid the shirt off my shoulders, pushed it down my arms…and froze.
She let go of the shirt, and her fingers skimmed over the tattoo I’d gotten two weeks ago. The tattoo I’d managed to keep a secret…until now.
“It’s beautiful.” She caressed the brush painting a streak of green and red along my arm. Each represented the favorite color of the two most important people in my life.
A symbol of my love for both my son and my wife.
A symbol that what we had together was permanent.
Callie was my forever.