ModelLove (11 page)

Sleep slipped away from Ian as a soft voice, gentle kisses
and caressing touches woke him. He stretched back to Temaru behind him and
buried his fingers in Temaru’s hair. “What time is it?”

“Early. The sun will be up soon. Come and watch the sunrise
with me.”

Ian scooted back toward him. “There’s only one thing I’m
interested in watching rise at this hour.”

Temaru pressed his hard cock to Ian’s ass. “But you’ve
already missed that.”

“Then I guess the only thing for me to do is appreciate it.”

“And I’ll certainly let you do that, after you watch the
sunrise with me.” Temaru kissed Ian’s shoulder. “We haven’t gotten to watch it
the whole time you’ve been here. Now you’re leaving tomorrow. I want to share
at least one with you.”

Ian rolled toward him, meeting his gaze. “I want that too.”

Temaru smiled, but Ian could see the sadness behind it and
heard how he forced his voice to be bright as he spoke.

“Then get out of bed!” Temaru gave him a light slap on the
ass. He tossed off the blankets and hopped up. He walked around the bed,
dragging one of the blankets off, though he didn’t bother to cover himself.
Reaching the bedroom door, he glanced back at Ian. “Coming?”

“That was my plan, but now you’re making me get up to watch
the sunrise.”

Temaru chuckled and turned around, giving Ian a full view of
his ass as he walked away.

Ian stared at it until Temaru was out of sight, knowing
Temaru was using his ass to coax him to follow. The man was damn smart.

Ian flung the blankets aside and climbed out of bed. He
walked through the bungalow to the front veranda, where Temaru already sat on
the bench swing with the blanket covering himself. He lifted the blanket in
invitation.

Ian sat next to him, wrapping his arm around him as Temaru
covered him with the blanket. He rested his head against Temaru, exhaling a
sigh.

How had the time gone so quickly? It seemed like he’d just arrived
in Bora Bora and now it was almost time for him to leave. By their third day
together, they spent every minute at each other’s sides. He didn’t sleep
another night in the beach house. He went out with Temaru on his dives and
snorkeling trips with customers. During Temaru’s time off, they explored the
island, hiking, sailing around the islets and visiting the capital, Vaitape. It
amazed him how even though the island was small, it seemed there were endless
things to see.

Of everything, nothing amazed him more than Temaru. It was
so strange how when he was with him, he forgot the hurt that’d weighed him down
for so long and bad memories became hazy. Even when Aiden crossed his mind, he
always saw him smiling during their good times together, instead of his last
memory of him being the only one in his mind.

When he originally left for Bora Bora, he’d done so with the
weak hope that in coming here, he would remember what the world looked like
with color again. He’d gained so much more. Temaru had unlocked his good
memories so he could visit them once again.

Through all the time he shared with Temaru, one of the
things that amazed him most was how Temaru didn’t press to know about his past.
He hadn’t told him how Aiden passed away. He wanted to. So many times the story
was on the tip of his tongue, but then he’d start to fear that Temaru might
look at him differently. Now that he was going to be leaving and with what he
hoped to do for his—their—future, he wondered if he should tell Temaru.

As he thought on it, he realized he had to. Temaru needed to
know the full truth of him and how Temaru reacted would determine whether or
not he would follow through with the plan he’d formed.

Ian stared ahead, the sky already lighting near the horizon.
He closed his eyes, hoping Temaru would still care for him after he told him
about Aiden, and he
did
know Temaru cared for him. He saw it every time
Temaru looked at him, each time he touched him, kissed him, made love to him.
He only hoped Temaru saw and felt the same from him.

Ian took a breath, his voice still leaving him softer than
he intended. “This is something Aiden would’ve loved to do.”

Temaru moved one hand under the blanket, resting it on Ian’s
thigh. “He enjoyed watching the sunrise?”

Ian gave a small nod. “The sunrise, the sunset. He was very
drawn to the natural world.”

“Then that’s something you share with him.”

“It is now. Back when he was alive, I didn’t appreciate it
like he did. I couldn’t see beyond the runway. All I appreciated were nice
clothes, a fat paycheck, a good party and a hot fuck.”

“You were young.”

“It’s still not a good excuse. He was young too, but he was
still able to see what was really valuable in the world. And more than
appreciating the world around him, but appreciating people. The ones who truly
cared about him and us. Not the ones who were just a good time to party with,
which were the only ones I thought were worth my time back then. If I would’ve
listened to him and just once tried to see what he saw, he’d still be alive.”

Temaru gave Ian’s leg a comforting squeeze and spoke in a
soft voice. “You don’t know that.”

“No, I do. You don’t know…it’s my fault he’s gone.”

“I don’t believe that.”

“It’s true.” Ian pulled his arm away from Temaru and turned
to look at him directly. “He died in a car accident, in the back of a limo he
never should’ve been in, but he was because of me.”

Temaru sat quiet for a moment, contemplating him. “But, how
is it your fault?”

“Because he didn’t want to go out that night. But he never
did, because it drove him crazy how people acted. He used to like it when we
were younger, but he either burned out on it or grew out of it. Probably both.
But I didn’t. I was a successful model, making enough money where I stopped
looking at the price tag on things, schmoozing with people the rest of the
world dreamed about getting the chance to only shake hands with. And I worked
hard at it, so I thought it was my right to play hard too.

“But I was only seeing the surface of things, even the
people I hung out with. If I would’ve stopped like he did and taken the time to
really look at my life, I would’ve seen I was headed for a fall. Instead, Aiden
took the fall for me. That night, he wanted to stay home and relax, but I
pestered him until he caved and came out with me. Even though he didn’t like
going out, I loved having him with me.

“He was the only person I could be honest around, that I
could depend on. And he did have fun once we’d get to the clubs, mostly
laughing at other people’s stupidity. But he gave up drinking and he rarely
danced unless a really hot guy asked him, so it was mild amusement for him.”

Ian lowered his gaze, his voice rougher as he continued.
“We’d been at the club all night. I was pretty lit, but he’d been drinking
water since we got there. Some of my friends wanted to go to a different club,
so I dragged him into our limo.”

He closed his eyes. “We never even saw the other car. We
were going through an intersection and it ran a red light and crashed into the
side of the limo. One second, everyone was laughing, having a good time. The
next, it was chaos. It hit on Aiden’s side. The impact was so hard, it ripped
through the limo. Aiden landed on top of me, but…he was already gone.

“The doctor at the hospital said he’d taken a hard blow to
the head, that he probably never knew what hit him. I don’t know if that makes
it better or worse. Sometimes I’m grateful he didn’t know. Other times, I want
to scream at how unfair it was because he didn’t see it coming. He deserved to
know what happened.”

Temaru moved as close to him as he could, taking both of
Ian’s hands in his. “I don’t know which is better either. But I think that if
he could’ve chosen someone to have with him when he went, it would’ve been
you.”

His throat tight with emotion, Ian said, “Being with me is
what killed him.”

Temaru lifted one hand to Ian’s cheek, cupping it gently.
“Being with you is what made him happy.”

Ian slowly lifted his head to meet Temaru’s gaze.

Temaru offered him a soft smile. “You say he didn’t like
going out and that could be true. But even from what you said, I can tell he
enjoyed being with you. Maybe the actual going out didn’t make him happy, but
spending time with you did. He passed away doing what he enjoyed with someone
he loved.”

Ian stared at Temaru, his emotions strengthening until he
feared he wouldn’t be able to hold them back. He wrapped his arms around
Temaru, holding him tight. He tried to fight back tears, but two still escaped
and more flooded his eyes. A choked sob left him. He swallowed another that
threatened to come out.

Temaru rubbed one hand up and down Ian’s back. “It’s okay.
You’ve held it in long enough.”

As if Temaru’s words gave him the permission he’d wanted for
so long, Ian let his sadness, his hurt, his regrets, pour out. Through the rush
of his emotions, one rose above all the hurt: love. He knew he had completely
and wholly fallen in love with Temaru.

The realization eased his hurt and slowed his tears. After a
few minutes, he sat back and took Temaru’s hand. “Now that you know, does it
change how you look at me?”

Temaru laid his other hand over Ian’s. “All it does is make
me feel even closer to you.”

Ian brought their lips together in a soft kiss. He opened
his eyes, their lips still lightly touching, and saw sunlight shining over
Temaru’s face. He slowly turned his head toward the horizon, now lit with gold.
He rested his head on Temaru’s shoulder. “Remember when we first met, you said
you preferred the sunrise to the sunset, because it felt like there was more
hope in the sunrise?”

Temaru laid his head on Ian’s. “Yes.”

“I believe you now.”

Temaru placed a kiss on Ian’s cheek and whispered, “I don’t
want you to leave tomorrow.”

“I don’t want to leave. But I have to. Just to get a few
things straightened out, then I’ll come back.”

“Do you mean that?”

Ian sat up, meeting Temaru’s tawny gaze. “Yeah. I’ve got a
new dream for myself. I’m going to start modeling again, but I’m going to do it
on my terms, only accept the jobs I really want. And that’s how I’m going to
treat it, like a job. No partying, no screwing around. It’s just a means for
money so I can live here. But I want to move here before I start working, so
I’m going to go back to Chicago, sell off some stuff, pack the things I need
and come back.” He grinned at him. “Only problem is, I’ll need a place to stay
until my career takes off again.”

Temaru wrapped him in a strong embrace. “That’s not a
problem at all. You have a place to stay and to live, even after your career is
going again.”

“Thank you. Because that’s what my dream really is. Modeling
will just help to make it come true.”

“You don’t even have to do that much for it to come true.”

“But I want to help out, make sure we can always be
comfortable. And doing that won’t take long if I’m able to get the kinds of
jobs I used to. Of course, I might be a little too optimistic in hoping that’ll
happen. But I’ll do my best and Mitch has been known to work miracles when it
comes to getting jobs.” Ian drew back, caressing Temaru’s cheek. “It’ll all be
worth it to be with you.” He leaned toward, his lips nearly touching Temaru’s.
“Because I love you.”

Temaru took Ian’s other hand in his. “And I love you.”

Ian closed their mouths together, the kiss slow and
passionate. His tongue moved over Temaru’s.

As the kiss came to a slow end, Ian rested his head on Temaru’s
shoulder. He watched the sun rising higher over the water, the light and color
growing brighter. Even though he didn’t want to think of tomorrow’s sunrise
since it would take him away from Temaru, he would cherish this one knowing
many more were to come for them.

The sun crested higher, the brilliant colors fading to a
clear blue sky. Ian drifted his fingers up and down Temaru’s thigh. As his
touch moved up again, Temaru spread his leg further to the side. Ian lifted his
head off Temaru’s shoulder at the same moment Temaru bowed his toward him. Ian
met him in a soft, slow kiss. He let his fingers travel fully up Temaru’s inner
thigh, brushing over Temaru’s sac, up the hard cock.

Temaru eased the kiss to an end. “I’m going to go in and get
some things.”

Ian nodded, watching as Temaru stood, the blanket falling
away from him. The sunlight highlighted Temaru’s skin to radiant bronze. As
Temaru stood before him, the sky and ocean behind him, Ian’s emotions surged
through him. He was so in love with this man. So madly, utterly, completely in
love with him.

A soft smile on his lips, Temaru extended a hand to him. In
Temaru’s eyes, he saw all he felt for him reflected back. Ian took Temaru’s
hand and stood, moving close to kiss him again. His cock brushed along the side
of Temaru’s. Temaru shifted his hips, keeping their cocks touching. He cupped
the back of Ian’s neck, bringing their lips together. Ian parted his lips with
a moan and glided his tongue over Temaru’s as they each sought to enter the
other’s mouth. He felt Temaru’s fingertips trailing down his back in the
lightest of touches.

Temaru traced the curves of Ian’s ass. Ian shuffled his feet
to stand with his legs farther apart. Brushing inward along the bottom of one
ass cheek, Temaru moved up to Ian’s hole.

Ian broke the kiss, his voice low and rough. “I think you
better go in and get the stuff now.”

Temaru rested his hand on Ian’s chest. “Stay here.”

Ian kept his gaze on him as Temaru disappeared inside.
Temaru had the most tantalizing ass. He had to force himself to stay in place
and not follow him.

Only gone for a moment, Temaru returned with the lube and a
condom. He picked up the discarded blanket, snapping it out and floating it
down to the porch.