Read Miss Impractical Pants Online

Authors: Katie Thayne

Miss Impractical Pants (5 page)

“Let me take you to the airport. I never get to see you anymore.”

Dylan considered the offer for a moment. “I wouldn’t dream of taking you away from Christopher’s wedding. He’d be crushed.”

“He’ll be fine.”

“Then your stalker will be crushed.” Dylan nodded toward Jared, who was making his way toward them.

“Stop it.” She choked on a laugh. “I want to take you—it’s what I want to do the most tonight.” Although she was being playful, she couldn’t have been more sincere. He tried to speak, but she clamped her hand over his mouth. “Shut up. I’m taking you.” She stared him down until he gave her an affirmative nod.

“Where are you going?” Jared asked, seeming a bit territorial.

“I’m driving Dylan to the airport.”

“Oh.” His eyes fell with the disappointment of a boy whose dog had just run away.

Dylan made a quick study of Jared before deciding to push away from the table. Ignoring Katie’s silent plea for him not to leave, he announced, “I’m going to go make a call and check on my flight. Katie, I’ll catch up with you when it’s time to leave.”

Before Dylan could step away, Jared was already asking Katie to dance.

“I’m not much of a dancer.” She wasn’t lying—she’d never be a natural on a dance floor.

“Neither am I.” Jared flashed his perfect Colgate grin, which she felt generous to admit was his one endearing quality, as she didn’t really consider beefcake an asset.

As U2’s “With or Without
You
” played, his clumsy hands fumbled against her hips while he swayed her back and forth. She could almost feel the sweat from his hot palms seeping through her dress, and she knew they resembled that one prom couple where the boy is a solid four inches shorter than the girl.

Planting her feet, she wiggled out of Jared’s hold and carefully removed her heels. “That’s better,” she sighed. Happy to once again be her comfortable, five-foot-six self, she looped her arms back around his neck.

“Tons better,” he admitted. “I was starting to get a Napoleon complex.”

Katie grinned up at him, thinking there was a lot more truth to that statement than Jared cared to acknowledge.

The song ended, and Jared made no indication to dismiss her to her table. He held her tightly even though a fast, jazzy waltz had intimidated the majority of the young dancers off the floor. Jared should have had enough sense to let it intimidate him as well.

“May I cut in? I’d like to have a turn with my favorite partner.” Jim, the merciful angel, interrupted their dance. “Step aside, son, and let me show you how it’s done.”

She would have enjoyed the dance and the rare moment to catch up with Jim if she hadn’t been so aware of Jared leaning against a wall, watching her with puppy dog eyes. She happened to notice
Dylan approach him, say something, then nod in her direction. Jared returned the nod, but kept his eyes trained on Katie. Her back stiffened. She did not appreciate being the topic du jour.

As soon as the dance ended, she shoved her shoes back on and clunked toward them, set on putting an end to their fraternizing. “Hey Dyls, what’s going on?” She came to a wobbly stop by his side.

He put a steadying arm around her waist. “My flight has been delayed a couple of hours because of the storms.”

“That’s great! Now we can have more time to visit—maybe do something before you go?”

“What about your scuba diving trip?” Jared interrupted.

“I’ll have plenty of time to do both.” Her too-bright smile did nothing to hide the scowl festering under her brow.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea to be driving across the state in this weather, especially through the night,” Jared said, more to Dylan than Katie.

Katie’s fake smile faltered.
That strapping little pest is sabotaging my trip on purpose!

“Katie…” Dylan began in his reprimanding tone, “if it were safe to be traveling in these conditions, I would be able to get on a plane back to Washington.”

“I’ll be fine. Rhett Butler has four-wheel drive and I have enough Mountain Dew to keep me up all night.”

“Who’s Rhett Butler?” Jared asked.

Katie looked away.
Anyone who didn’t know about Rhett Butler didn’t deserve to be enlightened.

“That’s the name
ol
’ Scarlett here gave her car.” Dylan jerked a thumb toward Katie. “Aptly named,” he flashed quotation marks with
his fingers as he gave his Katie impersonation, “for its sleek nature, rugged design, and the ability to rescue her from the monotony of daily life.”

Katie folded her arms across her chest.
“Ha ha.
Don’t forget the only one who truly appreciates my independent nature.”

Jared seemed confused whether they were still talking about a car or a man, but it was clear he disliked this Rhett Butler, and changed the subject. “So, you’re still planning to go?”

Katie and Dylan answered in unison: “Yes.” “No.”

Their glares challenged one another until a devious glint stole into Dylan’s eyes and a villainous smile replaced the set line of his mouth. “You’re going to have to make a choice: hang out with me until my flight leaves or go scuba diving.”

“What? Are you serious?” Katie exhaled her annoyance.

“I’m very serious. I’m not going to hang out with you if you plan on driving through the night in this weather. I don’t want to feel responsible if anything happens.”

She gave a little chuckle. “Damn it, Dylan, why did you have to give me an ultimatum? You know that just makes me want to jump in my car and hit the road even more.”

Dylan shrugged. “I know. I’m just testing your devotion.”

“Dylan, I am hopelessly devoted to you.” Without missing a beat, she began belting the song “Hopelessly Devoted to You” in her best Olivia Newton-John impression, using Dylan’s thumb for a microphone.

Dylan clamped a hand over her mouth and giggled in her ear. “Shhh, people are staring.”

Katie swiped her tongue along the inside of his palm, causing him to release her lightening fast.


Ewww
, that is so disgusting!” He scrubbed his hand down his pant leg several times. “You are so juvenile.”

She grinned triumphantly. “Thank you. That’s what you get for giving me an ultimatum.” She offered him a sentimental smile. “Dylan, you’re on my Top Five Favorite People list, and I would rather spend a little bit of time with you tonight than do anything else.”

Dylan blushed at the compliment before deflecting it. “That list changes more often than the stock market.”

“Maybe, but so far you’ve always managed to keep a place on it.”

He waved his hand, changing the subject. “We should leave no later than 8:30, just in case the roads are bad. That’s forty-five minutes.
Forty-five minutes,
got it?”

She shrugged. “Sheesh, I got it, forty-five minutes.”

The whole time Christopher and Heather were cutting their cake, Katie
kept wanting
to check her watch—but she didn’t own one. Dylan grabbed her wrist and held it down to her side. “Would you relax?”

“I’m just excited to spend some quality alone time with you. Besides, it’s not going to be my fault if you’re late.”

A guilty smile flitted across his face. “
It’s
fine, I remembered to calculate for Katie Standard Time.”

“Katie Standard Time?”

Jared, still sticking to her like Gorilla Glue, let out a doofy laugh. “I’ve heard of K.S.T.”

Dylan took a step away from Katie’s glare, amusement spilling into his eyes. “Don’t blame me—Christopher made it up.” He pointed to Christopher, who, wiping cake from his cheek, came over to join his friends, with Heather in tow.

“What? What did I do?” Christopher asked, catching Katie’s dagger-glare along with the tail end of the conversation.

“Katie Standard Time?”
Katie accused.

“K.S.T.”
Heather giggled. “That’s his favorite phrase.”

Christopher looked impish, his face turning beet red.

It would be bad form to publicly show her irritation with the groom, so Katie turned her attention back to Dylan. “So, how much time do we have before we need to leave?” she fished, hoping to discover the discrepancy between regular time and Katie Standard Time.

“Leave?” Sheila swooped in almost in a panic. “Katie-Bug, I need your help! Heather’s family has gone!”

“What?” Katie looked to either side of her as if it
were
a lame joke and Heather’s relatives were actually standing right next to her. All Katie saw was Heather, not looking surprised or even concerned by the news that her family was MIA.

“Heather, is everything all right?” Katie asked, still uncertain why this news was so significant to Sheila and what it had to do with her.

“Everything is fine,” Heather responded, staring down at her hands. “There’s supposed to be another nasty set of storms coming in. Some of the interstates have already been closed. My family has a bit of a drive ahead. They were hoping to get ahead of the worst weather.”

Dylan looked smugly at Katie. If they hadn’t been surrounded by people, she’d lick his face just to get rid of that “I told you so” smirk.
             

Sheila sighed dramatically. “That means Jim and I are left to deal with that monster of a cake, a small mountain range of presents, not to mention whatever mess is left in the dressing rooms.”

It didn’t take a flash of genius to understand what Sheila was asking for. Katie racked her brain for a solution. Even if they could reach Heather’s family, suggesting they get a hotel was pointless. With the amount of snow they’d been having, all the hotels for miles would be packed with ski enthusiasts.
What kind of Coloradans don’t plan ahead for winter weather?

“I had already made plans to drive Dylan to the airport.” Katie gave an unconscious tug at the bodice of her clingy dress. “But I can come back after and help.”

“You won’t have time to do both. I’m sure Jared wouldn’t mind driving Dylan,” Sheila protested.

“No, Sheila.” Jim had just joined the conversation in time to see Katie’s crestfallen expression. “Let Katie spend time with her friend. You and I can manage just fine.”

“How am I supposed to get back to L.A. tonight if I’m stuck here cleaning up all evening?”

“Katie can take Dylan to the airport and Jared can help bring everything back to the house,” Christopher suggested, turning to Jared. “Would you mind?”

Before Jared could give his ready consent, Sheila interrupted. “But only Katie will know where to put everything.”

“What does it matter where anyone puts things?” Christopher challenged. “That house has sat empty since you and Dad split.”

There was a short uncomfortable silence, in which Katie made the mistake of stealing a glance at Heather. The bride looked sick with
embarrassed
distress. Before she could stop herself, Katie was saying, “That’s okay. I can catch up with Dylan some other time. I don’t mind helping out here.”

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