Read Mindlink Online

Authors: Kat Cantrell

Mindlink (26 page)

“Geez.” Her eyes flew closed and she moaned. “How do you know
the exact right way to do that? I swear I’m not feeding you this stuff. Am
I?”

He did it again, anxious to hear that amazing moan which he’d
personally elicited. “Some. Not all. I am not stupid and can reasonably be
expected to develop my own—”

“Shut up, already. Holy cow, you talk a lot. Have you always
been like this, or am I special?”

“You are very special,” he agreed and laved his way up her arm
to her throat. He kissed it, then said into her ear, “I spent a lot of time
sequestered in my office. People rarely spoke to me. I believed it was as it
should be. Imagine my surprise to discover I enjoy conversation, as long as it
is with you. Do you enjoy it as well?”

“No,” she mumbled and jerked away from his mouth, which he’d
rested on the curve of her lobe. “Talking sucks. In fact, less talking is what
we need. Let’s see what it takes to get you back to speechless.”

In a flash, she had him on his back and proceeded to show him
the way to madness via her lips and tongue, driving him out of his mind until he
begged for something, anything to make it stop.

Writhing, he locked onto her upper arms and flipped. She landed
flat on her back, and he covered her, draping his body over hers so their flesh
touched from neck to ankles. Yes. Exactly as he’d seen a dozen times or more in
his head. But this was the real thing and he wanted more.

Their mouths met in the middle, fiercely, tongues seeking. His
hands raced over what of her flesh he could reach as he fell into the kiss. As
he plunged them both into erotic images.

She gasped and her head tilted to the side. “Oh my God, are you
sure your shoulder is healed enough for that?”

“I am genetically enhanced. I heal quickly. If you plan to
talk, at least say something of value,” he commanded and feasted on her throat.
Slid a sweaty palm down her leg and yanked, pulling it up and wrapping around
his waist. Raised his thigh to hold it in place. Desperate to somehow be
closer.

Moans seemed to be all she could manage. He wound up her hair
in his hand and pulled her head back farther, arching her against him, biting
and sucking whatever his mouth hit next. Fire burned in his throat and pulsed
through his groin, his erection, until he was convinced his skin would
incinerate.

“I...need—something,” he huffed. “Water.”

“Not water.” Panting, she grabbed his head and stared straight
into his eyes as she projected an image. “Do it. Now.”

He glanced down, frozen, unsure how to maneuver that way. Maybe
if he could see...

“Sam! For Chri—” Impatiently, she circled him with her hand and
guided him to the crevice between her thighs. Hot dampness sizzled against his
tip.

In one motion, she raised her hips and rotated, plunging him
into the tight fire. He threw his head back as ecstasy flooded his senses.

“Now move,” she said and demonstrated by easing off. Then with
a claw hold on his thigh, propelled him into her slick heat again. Rays of
sunlight crowded into his consciousness, blinding him. Then the sun blasted
apart into a spectacular supernova.

When he finally pried open his scorched eyes, she was watching
him. He lay on top of her, spent, and still inside her. “I cannot feel my
legs.”

She laughed, but it sounded artificial. “I would call that a
success, then. Do you feel human?”

“What is the matter?” He searched both her face and her
thoughts, but only saw stillness. A calm he didn’t recognize. Calm and Ashley
together wasn’t right. A flutter in his midsection climbed up his windpipe,
choking off his air supply. “You are behaving strangely. It makes me nervous.
Are you ill?”

She buried her face in his shoulder. “Stop trying to analyze
me. This is for you, all you. Did you enjoy it? If so, shut up and be
happy.”

“I did enjoy it. Joy is a good word for how I feel. How I felt.
Now I am worried.” He stroked her hair and stared at the wall behind her head,
trying to determine what he should say. “I dislike not understanding the
protocol for this activity.”

The muffled laugh was less forced this time, and rumbled
pleasantly against his skin. “There’s no protocol. It’s just sex.”

“Just? I do not think that experience can be described with
‘just.’” With a finger, he lifted her chin from his collarbone and looked into
her eyes. They were muted, dry. Blocked, like her thoughts. She was hiding
something, but he feared asking about it since she’d laid down clear rules. “It
was cataclysmic. Phenomenal. I did not know such heights could be achieved
outside of death. I fully understand why it is not promoted among citizens.”

“Why is that?” she asked brightly, as if thrilled to latch onto
a subject change. She wiggled out of his grasp and started to sit, but he pulled
her back. He was not ready to end this night.

“Because it is incredibly distracting. Very little work would
ever be completed.” He traced the outline of her lips with a fingertip, then
replaced it with his lips. A whisper of a kiss—the kind he’d learned led to the
other kind. How interesting to discover the meeting of mouths could be so
different depending on the circumstances. “What did it feel like for you?”

“Fine.”

He frowned. “Fine is applicable to the grade of carbohydrogen
used in barge fuel. It is not a word used in sex.”

“It is when I say it is.” She glared at him, her expression
hard in the flickering light, then she turned over to face the wall. “Drop it,
okay? You got what you asked for and I’m glad I could help. Now I want to go to
sleep. Go back to your own room.”

Sadness. Finally, he sensed sadness and saw the face of a man
in an image, one he did not recognize. Just as quickly, it was gone, but the
almost red color lingered.

Icy sweat sprang up across his forehead. He’d done something
wrong, something to make her unhappy, but what? The one clue he’d received—from
her image—he wasn’t permitted to discuss. Suddenly, he regretted asking her to
do this. She hadn’t wanted to, but sacrificed herself on the altar of his
loneliness and confusion. The cocoon of sheer bliss he’d been wrapped in since
Ashley had agreed to experience this amazing activity dissolved.

No, she hadn’t agreed to experience this. She had agreed to
help him experience it and had carefully steered away from anything she deemed
“about her.”

Clarity burst into his skull and he knew exactly what piece of
this he’d missed. “Your sun did not explode. Did it?”

“It’s called an orgasm. It’s not a big deal.” Her arms came up
around her shoulders, like she struggled to hold herself together, and a cramp
in his stomach almost made him violently ill. She hurt and his selfishness and
inexperience were to blame.

“How is it possible for me to have one without you?”

At that, she snorted. “Because I’m pretty good at this, or so
I’ve been told. In fact, it’s the only thing I have any real talent for. So I
think the better question is why would you
care
?”

Her heavy and ugly bitterness swamped him. “Ashley.”

When he didn’t continue, she half rolled to look at him.
“What?”

“We have a fundamental problem. I can see your thoughts but
only what you let me see and I cannot question you about any of it. I can talk
to you but I cannot force you to respond.” He stabbed a finger at the door
without taking his gaze from hers. “There are approximately four hundred humans
in Kir Dashamun and I am certain at least one could have been persuaded to show
me the basics of procreation. Yet I did not ask anyone else, because I wanted to
experience it with you. I trust you. I crave you. When you block yourself off
from me, it is only half of an experience, for both of us. I am disappointed
this is what you believed I wanted. It is not.”

One tear slipped from her welling eyes and fell to the pallet
below. “I’m sorry you’re disappointed,” she whispered. “I was trying to make it
good for you. That’s what every other man in the universe wants.”

“These other men missed the essential point of sex.” He kissed
the trail of her tears and gathered her up into his arms so he could hold onto
her for no other reason than because he liked the feel of her heartbeat next to
his.

“Oh, so you’re an expert now after having done it a whole one
time?” she retorted with a watery laugh and slid her arms around him. His
stomach settled.

“I am an expert in logic and reason. This can be applied to all
situations, including sex. As such, I have concluded it is an activity designed
for two parties to share a connection. Now I must ask you to do something else
for me.”

“I’m kind of in the middle of the last favor you asked me to
do,” she said, but raised her eyebrows in question.

“I want to make your sun explode. Tell me how to accomplish
this.”

Chapter Fourteen

Geez, the man did nothing in halves. She’d fooled
herself into believing because she had all the experience, she’d be able to
skate through this easily. Unscathed. He was normally so composed and in
control—how was she supposed to predict he’d get all gooey and romantic on her?
Or that it would mean so much?

Now he wanted her to talk. About what it took to make her come,
no less.

“Ah...I’m not sure I know how to tell you,” she mumbled and her
mind went blank. She had no idea what to say to someone who viewed sex as a
connection instead of currency. Now would be a great time for someone to yell,
“Cut!”

“Ashley. Do not block yourself. Please. I rely on your
guidance, in all things. Speak the words,” he said.

She hesitated. Why was this so important to him?

“Open your mouth and tell me. You have had this happen to you
in the past, correct?”

Man, was he bossy. Only he spit out his demands in that
spine-tingling accent, then stared at her as he nibbled on her palm. Unabashedly
naked, with all his sinewy muscles swelling across his torso and bunching along
his arms. Teeth scraped the tender part of her wrist and her abdomen quickened
and throbbed.

Bossy. But so, so sexy.

“Sure, lots of times. Mostly by myself.” Images rocketed to him
before she could stop it. She sighed. “How did you get me to admit that?”

He groaned and shut his eyes. “Despite having such a primitive
reaction to the picture, there will be no more ‘by yourself.’ I assume you
intended that image to be instructional. Your fingers were...” His hand glided
to the spot between her legs. “Here. Like this?”

All her breath gushed out in a heavy stream at the firm rub of
his fingers. “That’s pretty close.”

Her head lolled backward as twists of tension spiraled higher
and higher. One thing she hadn’t considered—he was turning her so brainless, it
might be easier to keep certain things out of her thoughts than she
expected.

“Tell me. What should I do next?”

“Kiss me,” she said because she had to say something and that
seemed like a safe enough step.

Then his lips claimed hers, stroking in tandem with his
fingers. She arched against his touch, moaning. How was he so good at this? That
dark thrill smoked along her skin, furrowing tendrils of fire—all the more
intense because she no longer had to be icked out by a wicked attraction to an
alien.

Pulling back slightly, he asked, “More? Something else?”

She had no experience with this kind of sex. Lovers did this
stuff, whispering in the dark about their fantasies and falling asleep in each
other’s arms. Intimate things, only available to other people, who were okay
inside. Normal. Not someone broken like her.

“I can’t talk about this.”

His hand stilled and slid up to her thigh, cupping it lightly.
Tenderly. No one had ever treated her so carefully, like she was fragile and
precious.

“I like it when you talk, but it is not necessary. We have an
excellent way of communicating. Think about what you would like for me to do.
Anything at all.”

His wet-hazel eyes captured hers, assessing unobtrusively, and
his other hand threaded through her hair. Through the link, he streamed a quiet
pleasure in just touching her. What did she do with that? It numbed her throat.
And her vocal chords.

“Ashley. You seem to be operating under the misconception that
I have a foundation from which to judge you, to find something wrong with your
memories and determine you lack in some way. You forget I have never been to
Earth. Being human is new. I have no preconceived ideas about this or anything
from your past.”

His words soaked through all the ugliness inside. How had she
not seen that before? Sam was a blank slate, free from the prejudices of Earth.
He’d already agreed not to ask questions, and now he’d made it clear he wouldn’t
realize how stupid she sounded or what a terrible person she was. Or how she
didn’t deserve any of this, even though she wanted it. Oh, how she wanted it,
wanted him. Wanted to believe he’d be different.

He claimed to trust her. Maybe she could reciprocate. Just a
little.

She dropped all the carefully constructed barriers in her mind
and allowed her deepest desires to flow out.

His head snapped backward and his fingers nipped into her skin.
“By the Ancestors.” His breath whistled out in a rush. “I am grateful I was
already lying down. I, ah, do not believe I am capable of that last one.”

With a smile, she said, “You asked for it. You can start
anytime.” She gave an airy wave and squealed when he captured her fingertip in
his teeth and sucked. A weight in her chest lightened as he pulled her
closer.

Using his imagination in combination with her illustrated
instructions, he drove her relentlessly with his teeth, tongue, lips and
fingers, tasting her all over—to the point where her images and thoughts
free-flowed together with his so perfectly, they were one. And both were
mindless, so lost in pleasure and each other, the planet could split in two
without either of them noticing.

At their mutual breaking point, when she sobbed his name
because she couldn’t form any other sounds, he repositioned her onto her hands
and knees and thrust into her from behind with one quick, perfect stroke.

She ground against him, gritting her teeth against the
simultaneous torrent of his bliss and her own. One built on the other, spiraling
into a vortex of hot need.

“Move. Now,” she commanded.

Sam’s indrawn breath rattled in her ear and his abs were an
inferno against her back. “Not this time,” he said.

He flicked the spot where she’d touched herself in the images.
Then thrust. And flicked. Repeatedly.

She throbbed and writhed, seeking that elusive release. Then
all at once, everything contracted and spun her into oblivion. She might have
screamed. Burst after pounding burst pummeled her and his sun shattered into the
debris of hers.

“Yes,” he hissed and collapsed to the side, taking her with
him, still wrapped in his embrace, still half inside her. “That is the
connection I envisioned, the fusion of bodies and minds.”

She hadn’t. She couldn’t have envisioned anything close to that
reality. No script in existence could describe being one with Sam, with no
barriers between them. Not even Ashley V. It was a relief, honestly, to drop
every last shield and be so rewarded for trusting him with her innermost flaws.
He would never hurt her, lie to her, or use her for some sick game. How freaking
amazing.

She couldn’t move, could barely breathe. Dear God, if she could
bottle that orgasm, they’d name a state after her. He’d made a convert out of
her. She’d never again think of sex as merely the meeting of bodies or an
unpleasant task to be endured until it was over. No way she’d settle for it,
either.

She pushed away brutal memories of Hugh and a parade of people,
like Senator Blanchard, before they could ruin her mood.

“Now I understand why people risk their lives to be free,” he
said in a slow exhale. Absently, he wound her hair up around his hand and
threaded it through his fingers. “This nirvana cannot be found in the regimented
and controlled environment of the Telhada.”

“It, um, can’t be found on Earth either.” The link heightened
everything, sharpening sensations. Okay, and the whole bit about him asking
questions, imploring her to open up, caring about her pleasure, being the most
selfless lover she’d ever had. That might have something to do with it, too.

He didn’t have a clue how pale and lackluster regular sex was
in comparison.

How lovely to lie here and be together instead of immediately
hopping up, getting dressed and parting ways. After a while, he kissed her hand
and said, “When you are well rested, I will try again. I am certain I can
improve.”

“Jesu—That wasn’t your best shot?” she croaked. “I don’t know
if I could survive any improvements. Wait.” She elbowed him in the chest. “That
wasn’t funny.”

He laughed and it vibrated against her spine.

“Aren’t you pleased with yourself?” She couldn’t help but
smile. Sex. Jokes. He just needed a divorce and a tax bill to be an average
human.

“I am. I cannot recall the last time I laughed. It is
cathartic. I know what it means to be happy now.”

Thick beams of sunlight washed over her through the link.

“Good for you. I’ve been curious. Why do you always project the
sun when you’re happy?”

“When you explained to me what happy feels like, you described
it as the sun shining on the inside.” His breath rushed across her ear, warming
it. That accent. She willed him to keep talking. He did. “Happy and sun are the
same, and are interchangeable with you.”

“What, because I make you happy?”

“Yes. The sun is not accessible to me except through you. You
are my sun. Without you, my world would still be colorless and dark.”

Blinking, she filtered through it, searching for something
other than the sincerity she heard in his words, and felt through the link.
People didn’t talk like that outside of B-movies.

Honesty sang back, zapping her in the heart, welling in her
throat like a thick cork she couldn’t swallow. He was turning her into a big
sappy mess over a few words. But they weren’t just words. The link communicated
far more than the simple concepts he’d spoken of.

He was developing feelings for her. So...not good. He didn’t
realize feelings changed, that the glow wore off after a while.

“Hang onto that sun. It’ll come in handy when you get to the
bad stuff. Remember what it feels like so you can find your way out,” she
advised.

“Bad stuff?” He tightened his arms around her.

She should have kept her mouth shut. Who was she to disillusion
him?

But he deserved to know the truth about how relationships
worked in real life. Why hadn’t she sorted through of all this before innocently
agreeing to this little experiment?

“Yeah. Being human is not all fun and games. Once you find
happiness, it’s all uphill from there. And life throws huge boulders at you as
you climb. Also known as heartbreak and disappointment.”

“What happened to cause you so much pain?”

Dang it. When she’d dropped all the barriers, she’d thrown them
away forever. It had been so nice to think about whatever came to mind for a
change, trusting he’d stick to his word.

“You’re not supposed to ask questions. But I’ll cut you some
slack this once.”

She couldn’t be angry with him for wanting to understand an
aspect of being human. Besides, the link went both ways. She could tell he
wasn’t judging her or withdrawing because he’d seen something he didn’t like.
There were more than a few benefits of being able to read the mind of the guy
she was sleeping with. He genuinely cared about the answer and expected nothing
in return from her.

But that didn’t mean she wanted to talk about it. “Let’s just
say people can be indescribably cruel to each other and often take as many
opportunities as they can to do it.” She broke out of his embrace and flung an
arm over her eyes. “This room is like a sarcophagus. And wow, do they not have
heaters around here? Hand me that blanket, will you?”

He leaned up and draped the blanket over them both. She scooted
out of his reach and he let her. In compensation, she folded her hand into his
and squeezed. Silence fell, but the message was clear. He wouldn’t ask any more
questions.

How could someone so perfect be real?

She’d have volunteered for his stupid list right off the bat if
she’d known
this
waited for her on a planet far, far
away. Too bad he couldn’t come home with her and live sequestered in her Beverly
Hills house. But “Ashley V’s Secret Alien Boyfriend” was never going to happen,
not in this lifetime. Her career couldn’t take something that scandalous and she
was determined to figure out how to stop the hemorrhaging and get back on
track.

She refused to believe she’d be stuck here forever. Sam would
figure out how to get her home. There wasn’t another option.

Sam drifted off and the link went with it. There and then gone
in a gentle rush. Peaceful. The pain was practically unnoticeable now, like an
intense workout regimen that got easier with time.

In sleep, Sam’s beautiful, human face relaxed. He was so
focused, so tightly wound when awake. And yeah, that focus. Unbelievable. It was
the stuff of legends and love songs. He’d fallen into the physicality of being
human with ease, learning and adapting as if he’d patiently waited for a green
light before slipping into his true self. He was brilliant.

He still held her hand, and she left it buried in his for fear
of waking him. Okay, and because it was sort of sweet.

She awoke nestled in Sam’s arms, spoon-style. Not the way she’d
fallen asleep. In fact, she didn’t remember falling asleep but fatigue must have
pulled her under. His arms shifted, sliding along hers, and one hand trailed
across her stomach.

He was awake. Extremely awake, judging by the hard length
against her butt.

“Again?” she asked in mock disbelief. They must put something
in the water here to give people extra stamina. He was like renewable dynamite.
Not that she was complaining...

“I have not yet experienced the act of awakening with you. I
would—”

She rolled toward him and stuck her mouth on his. Why had the
universe conspired to drop the most talkative man alive in her lap? He took the
hint and used his tongue in a much more effective way. While he still managed to
get her blood steaming, the kiss lacked something.

“Sam. Open your eyes.” All his delicious weight pinned her to
the mat, their legs twined like licorice, and he hadn’t looked at her once.

Slowly, his lids rose and revealed affection, relief,
understanding beneath—and they hadn’t even linked yet. A pang contracted her
chest as he lowered his head, coming nearer to the point of abject intimacy. The
link completed and his sun burst into her head as his lips grazed hers. She sank
into the kiss, falling into a free dive, side by side with Sam.

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