Melting Steel: An Alpha Billionaire Romance (12 page)

Keeley

I toss and turn, kicking at the covers that are wrapped too tight around my body. A cold sweat breaks out across my skin, and pure terror sweeps through me like a dark entity sent to consume and destroy my soul. A prisoner to the dreams that would forever keep their hold. Always there, always threatening. Drew. Lily. Jax. My mom – But it’s Henry’s face I see this time. Laughing and mocking as I fall through the black void that devours me.

“Keeley. Wake up.” Henry’s voice pulls me from the nightmare, but the minute I wake up, nausea rolls over me. He wipes the damp hair off my forehead while I count to ten in my head, praying that my stomach will settle.

“I’m okay,” I say, placing my palm on his face, and wishing I wasn’t the cause of the concern I see on it.

“The nightmares are getting worse.”

He’s right. They are. But they aren’t just nightmares. They’re memories. So vivid they tear open the wound on my soul, making me sink deeper into the fortress I’ve built around myself.

“It’s fine. I’m fine,” I lie, wiggling out of his embrace and sitting up. Immediately I regret the action. My head spins, my stomach revolts and sweat slickens my skin. I place my hands on the edge of the bed, feet on the floor, ready to bolt to the bathroom if I need to.

I can’t be sick. Not for Becca’s wedding.

“Shit, Keeley, you’re white as a ghost.” Henry practically jumps across the bed to crouch in front of me.

So protective.

My heart clamors in my chest, begging me to give everything to him, and yet unable to. I feel like I’m standing on a precipice, teetering on the edge. But fear holds me back from taking that final step.

“I’m just nervous about today.” I touch his cheek, and he leans into my hand.

“I told you, you have nothing to worry about. Becca took care of it. The Sullivan’s won’t be there.” He takes my hands and places a gentle kiss on each knuckle.

Strength and warmth.

The possessive looks he gives me eases my anxiety, the way it always does when he lays claim to me. Making me believe that everything will be all right. That maybe I’m not fooling myself trusting that this thing between us is something real, something lasting.

“I’ll make us breakfast,” Henry says, brushing his lips over mine, before standing.

I give a small nod and wait until he’s left the room to make my way to the bathroom, still dizzy and slightly nauseous.

I’ve felt off for the past couple of days. I’ve blamed it on nerves, on the stress of everything that’s happened with Drew, but there’s a nagging feeling in the back of my mind that it’s something more. Something I don’t even want to contemplate.

Leaning against the bathroom counter, I stare at my reflection, and my heartrate accelerates at the word that flashes like a neon sign in my mind –
pregnant
.

I clench my teeth and avert my gaze. Shit. I count the days in my mind and curse under my breath.

Two, maybe three, days late.

I can’t be
. But even as I think it, I know it’s a probability. Fuck. How could I have been so stupid? I place my hand over my stomach and close my eyes.

What would Henry think? That I planned on trapping him with a child he doesn’t want. Just like my mother, believing that a baby would make him mine.

But he’s already yours
, a small voice in the back of my mind protests.

I shake my head, unable to believe it. Still not willing to take the chance that someone like Henry could really love me. The tape that’s been holding my broken heart together all these years threatens to come undone. What would happen if I let it shatter all around me?

Maybe my mind would just go, like Drew and Abby.

No. I’m stronger than that. At least I use to be. Before Henry. Before hope.

Numbly, I step in the shower and turn the water on cold, needing the painful prick of the ice water to clear my head.

Don’t panic until you have reason to
, I remind myself.

But Drew’s words continue to echo like a broken record,

You’re just like our mother – a whore.

My heart thuds violently in my chest.

Despite Henry’s insistence that what we have is real, I can’t shake the feeling that I’m repeating the same cycle.
Like mother, like daughter.

Henry

I’m worried about Keeley. Hell, I’m always worried about her. But she’s acting more distant than normal, and I can’t shake the feeling that she’s going to run.

She hasn’t spoken about Drew since the day at the café, dismissing me whenever I mention him. I’ve given her space, but I’m starting to wonder if I should have pushed more, because she’s shutting down on me and there’s nothing I can fucking do about it.

It’s only when my hands are on her skin, my cock buried deep inside her that she lets her guard down. The rest of the time she’s constructed a barricade so wide, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to bridge the gap.

After the wedding I plan on taking a few weeks off, get her out of the city, away from the reminder of all the shit she’s been going through.

My cell vibrates, letting me know that a car is waiting for us.

Unease winds through me. I’m still not happy about this marriage, but I’ve come to terms that it’s what Becca wants.

Keeley walks out of the bedroom and I’m rendered speechless. She’s always beautiful. Christ, she could wear a brown paper bag and still be the most gorgeous woman in the world. But dressed in the soft blue silk dress, with matching stilettos, her hair pulled seductively on top of her head in an elegant up-do, she looks like she belongs on the cover of a fucking magazine.

“Is it okay?” she asks, glancing down at the dress. Her chin trembles slightly when her gaze catches mine.

“You’re stunning.”

“It’s too much.”

“Don’t do that.” I move towards her, reaching out and cupping her chin. “Don’t act like you’re not worthy.” I reach into my pocket and pull out the black rectangular box from my pocket and hand it to her. “I thought this would match your dress.”

“What is it?” She frowns.

“Open it and see.”

Slowly, she cracks the box, eyes widening when she looks down at the diamond and sapphire necklace. On a sigh her mouth parts, and she runs her fingers over the jewels.

“It’s beautiful.” She shakes her head, then closes the box and hands it back to me. “But I can’t.”

“Yes, you can.” I unhook the necklace and move behind her, placing it around her neck, then fasten the clasp. My fingers brush along her collar bone, and up along her jaw, and I breathe softly in her ear, “This is just the first of many things I’m going to give you.”

I feel her tremble against me, and smile, knowing that my touch will always overpower her protests. Turning her in my arms, I grin down at her, and trace the curve of the necklace.

“Perfect. Just like I thought.” I lean in and kiss her gently, eliciting chills. “I had another piece of jewelry that I wanted to give you, but I it’ll have to wait.”

She blinks up at me confused. “I don’t want anything else.”

I pray to God that’s not true. But it’s why the five carat engagement ring I purchased last week will stay in my pocket – until I know she’s ready. I just hope it’s sooner than later, because I want nothing more than to make her my wife.

Keeley

“Keeley.” Becca’s face lights up when she sees me. Ignoring the protests of the woman fussing over her, she pulls me into a hug. When she pulls back, she blinks through the tears that threaten to fall. “Sorry. I’m so emotional.”

“You look beautiful.” And she does. The white, strapless gown is unlike anything I’ve ever seen. I don’t even want to think about what it cost. I heard Henry mumbling over numbers, and nearly choked when he said something about her going three hundred thousand over budget.

The three women, all dressed in lavender bridesmaids’ dresses, move to the opposite side of the room, drinking champagne and gossiping over names I’ve never heard of.

Becca’s fingers tremble when she hands me a glass of champagne. I take it and clink the edge with hers.

“I’m doing the right thing,” she says, and I can’t tell if it’s a statement or a question. But I hear the uncertainty in her voice. She sinks slowly into a chair, and takes a deep gulp of the sparkling liquid.

I wonder now if Henry is right. If she isn’t marrying him just so that she can have access to the money her father left her. But why throw away a lifetime of happiness for money?

“Do you love him?” I cringe inwardly the moment I ask the question. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that.”

Dark eyes rest on me and there’s a sadness there that I hadn’t seen before. “He’s a good guy. He’ll be a good husband. A good father.”

“That’s not the same thing,” I say softly.

“It’s close enough.” She straightens her shoulders, her expression suddenly stoic. “Something is better than nothing, right?”

“I guess,” I say, not agreeing, but also knowing it’s not my place to argue. Who am I to give relationship advice?

There’s a small knock on the door, and Henry pokes his head in. “Is everyone decent?”

“Yes.” Becca’s face lights up again, and she stands and crosses the room towards her brother.

“You look stunning,” he says, leaning down to kiss her on the cheek.

“Ready to give me away?” she asks.

Henry sighs and shoves his hands in his pocket. “You still want to go through with this?”

She smacks him lightly on the shoulder and they both laugh, but I can see the tension that lingers in the unanswered question.

“I should go and find my seat,” I say, squeezing Becca’s hand when I pass by. “Good luck.”

She gives me the first genuine smile I’ve seen, and says, “Just think. It’ll be you next.”

“Becca.” Her name is a low rumble on his lips. So quiet, but the effect hits me with the force of a sonic boom.

Silence follows, tension quickly filling the small room.

Henry glowers at Becca, and she shrinks back.

I don’t need an interpreter to understand what passes between them.

Like a punch to the gut, I feel the air leave me in a solid rush. I don’t know why I’m so surprised. I’m not marriage material. Not for someone like him.

What had Jax said?

You think that Henry Caldwell would be with someone like you if it wasn’t for some gain? Sure, you’re a good fuck, but there’s never been much in that pretty little head of yours.

The bridesmaids must have caught the awkward conversation, because soft chuckles echo across the room.

My heart immediately sinks in my chest, the truth of how he sees me finally clear. Of course he’d never marry me. I hadn’t even begun to hope for such a thing. But to see the anger in his eyes when Becca suggested it, is too much.

Becca pales, concern flashing on her pretty face. “I’m sorry, I just thought–”

“You said enough,” Henry barks out, silencing her.

“It’s fine,” I say, a little too quickly. “I really should go. You look beautiful, Becca.”

I rush from the room, blinking back tears of humiliation.

“Keeley, wait,” Henry’s deep voice commands, stopping me before I make it halfway down the hall.

He stalks towards me, eyes flashing with concern, the anger from the moment before gone.

“You don’t understand–”

“And you don’t owe me an explanation.” I straighten my spine, steeling my emotions. “I’ve told you, I don’t expect anything from you. This thing between us, it’s just an overextended one-night stand.”

“Don’t.”

“Don’t what? Be honest?”

“Don’t trivialize what we have because you’re hurt.” He reaches out and brushes his knuckles across my cheek. “I love–”

“No. You’re confusing lust with love.” I take a quick step back, knowing that if I let him touch me, I’ll lose my resolve. “That’s all this is, all it will ever be. Let’s stop pretending it’s anything more.”

His eyes darken and the muscles in his face tighten.

“You’re pushing me away because you’re scared.”

“I’m pushing you away because it’s the right thing to do. If you care about me at all, you’d let me go now, while I still have a fragment of my heart.”

“If you’d let me explain–”

“I told you. I understand. I’m not angry with you. But I can’t keep doing this. I won’t be like her.”

“Like who? Like your mother? Is that how you see yourself, see me? You think I would abandon you like that bastard?”

“I don’t know, but I can’t take the chance.”

A wounded look that nearly unravels me crosses his face, as if I’ve just delivered a death blow.

“Five minutes,” a man says from the far side of the hallway.

“Shit.” Henry rakes his fingers through his hair, then points at me. “We’ll talk about this later.”

“There’s nothing to talk about. I’ll stay for the ceremony, but I think it’s best we end this now. I’ll get my stuff and be out of your apartment before you get home.”

I don’t wait for his response, I turn on my heels and race towards the exit, holding back the sob that threatens to choke me. One glance over my shoulder and I know he doesn’t follow.

Relief and regret war inside of me.

I hurt him. I saw it in his eyes.

Pain twists my insides. I shouldn’t have said the things I did. But better to leave now, before things get any more complicated.
Like me having his baby
.