Authors: Nicki Day
She nodded and sipped
her own cocoa. They sat there for a moment, looking up at the tree and the area
around them. There seemed to be something different about this night, which
made the silence almost deafening.
He could hear his
heart beating. And, despite their single moment of closeness earlier, he felt
an awkwardness between them and he hated it.
“I forgot how
beautiful Dove Creek is in the winter.”
“Yeah, I know what
you mean.” He agreed. “I come back every two or three years, but it never
ceases to surprise me.”
“Everything here is
so clean, untouched and pure. Not like in the city. Within an hour of every
snowfall the pollution turns the snow black and grey. It’s just not the same.
The City and County building of Denver does a huge light display, but it never
looks at Christmassy as this tree does.”
“There is something
different about this place. Maybe that’s why my folks settled down here all
those years ago and never left.”
“Oh, my God, Michael.”
She turned to him then. “I’m so sorry. I’d completely forgotten about your
father. My mom told me when he passed.”
“It’s okay. Dad lived
a good life. He was happy. That’s all I could ask for.”
“Still, I feel awful.
I should have sent some flowers or something.”
“Why?”
“I’m sorry?”
“Why send flowers? It
wouldn’t have made him come back. I mean, I know the gesture is kind and
people’s hearts are in the right place when they do it. But, I was at his
funeral and I remember looking at all of the floral arrangements people sent
and I thought… why? Dad’s gone. And if he were here he would’ve been
complaining about people wasting good money on something that was going to die
anyway.”
Vicky laughed. “I’m
sorry. I just can totally hear your dad saying something like that. He was a
good man, Michael. You were lucky to have him.”
“I know I was. We all
were. I just hope I make him proud.”
“If I know your dad
like I thought I did, I’d bet that he looks down on you and your brother and
mother from time to time. And I’m sure he is very proud of you.”
“Hope so,” he said
before taking another drink of his cocoa.
“Are you kidding? I
mean look at you. You’re a Marine. Just like you always wanted to be. You had a
dream and you went after it. I wish I had done that.”
He didn’t miss how
her expression changed. It was obvious she regretted things about her life.
“You used to have dreams. Whatever happened to your paintings and
drawings?”
She shrugged. “They
didn’t pay the bills.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I still
am able to use some of my creativity, though not quite in the way I ever
thought I would.”
“Yeah? What are you
doing now? If that’s okay to ask.”
She smiled. “Of
course it’s okay. I’m a graphic designer for a marketing firm in Denver. It’s
boring. Monotonous and not at all what I see myself doing for the rest of my
life, but like I said… it pays the bills.”
“Have you looked for
anything new lately?”
“No. I guess I got
stuck in a rut. Once you’re there, it’s hard to get out.”
“I understand.”
“You? Mr. Badass Marine?”
She smirked.
He chuckled. “Yeah,
badass. Sure.”
“Mind if I ask you a
personal question?”
“Sure.” He
nodded.
“Have you been to
war?”
While taking a drink
he stopped and turned to her. Slowly he lowered his cup and answered. “Yeah. I
have.”
“I’m sorry. I know I
shouldn’t have asked. It’s none of my business anyway.”
“No, it’s okay.
I…wasn’t expecting a question about that.”
“What were you
expecting?”
He looked at her, saw
the question in her eyes and knew she wouldn’t make a move unless he initiated
things first. Despite growing up, she still seemed to be timid and not one to
take charge.
“I don’t know. I
guess I figured you’d ask about my personal life. Like whether I’m seeing
anyone or not.”
“Oh.”
“You asked.”
“Yes, I know. I…I
mean, would that really be any of my business?” she asked.
Damn if she didn’t
look adorable from the way she fluttered her eyelashes at him. Knowing Vicky
she didn’t even realize the affects her simple gestures had on men, especially
him.
“I’d say it’s very
much your business.”
She didn’t say
anything, instead she turned away, looking up at the eastern mountains in the
distance.
“I’m sorry if that
makes you uncomfortable, Vick. I’m just being honest.”
She turned back to
him. “I haven’t had anyone call me that in a very long time.”
“What? Vick?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m glad.” Michael
leaned into her and cupped the side of her rosy cheek with his hand.
“Michael.” Her voice
trailed off to nothing but a whisper as her lips parted.
He stared into her
eyes as he drew in closer. Refusing to close them and hoping to see the green
of her irises light up, he pressed his lips against hers and felt the sweet
soft flesh of her plump lips for the first time in what felt like an
eternity.
Chapter Eleven
Vicky closed her eyes
the instant she felt his lips touch hers. Warmth spread throughout her body in
a rush. Like a waterfall of steam and heat, she could no longer tell she was
sitting outside in the heart of winter.
Only seconds passed
before she felt Michael’s other hand wrap around the nape of her neck and pull
her in closer. Her mouth parted wider, inviting him to take more. It was an
unconscious effort on her part. Something about Michael Barnett always made her
weak to him. The way he looked at her, kissed her and made her body react. She
melted underneath his touch.
He slid his tongue
inside her mouth and gently stroked it against hers. She moaned from the feel
of it. It was as if the thirteen years apart had never happened. Their tongues
began dancing with one another like it had been only hours since the last
time.
They kissed for
hours, or maybe it was only minutes. She couldn’t tell. She felt lost and
completely under his spell.
When he pulled away
he dropped his forehead against hers and whispered, “Oh, Vick.”
She said nothing. She
looked up at him, searching his green eyes for answers to questions that she
didn’t even know how to form.
What were they doing?
Was this crazy? She hadn’t seen him in so long.
“Say something,” he urged
her.
“I…I don’t know what
to say,” she whispered in response.
“Say anything. Tell
me what you’re thinking.”
“I’m not sure what
I’m thinking.”
“Come on, Vick. It
may have been thirteen years, but I know you better than that. I can see the
wheels turning behind your eyes.”
She sighed and closed
her eyes, wondering if she was crazy to be so happy to feel his hands on her
again.
“Just tell me, baby.”
Her eyes opened then.
She remembered so many nights he’d called her baby. It was a term of endearment
that made her putty in his hands. And what’s more was, he knew that.
“Michael, what are we
doing?”
“Well a minute ago we
were kissing.” He smiled.
“I’m serious. Why are
we doing this? Why go back to something that…” She didn’t finish her
sentence.
She wasn’t even sure
what she was trying to say. It wasn’t that he was offering her anything. For
all she knew he was deploying in days and needed a piece of ass before leaving.
She hated to think that about him, but she couldn’t forget the fact that
despite their past, she didn’t really know anything about Michael the man. The
last time she saw him he was merely a boy, and she was only a young girl.
Things had changed. Maybe he had too.
“Something
that…what?”
“Nothing.” She pulled
away.
As she tried to stand
in an effort to put distance between them he stopped her, placing his hand on
hers.
“Vick, don’t do
this.”
“Don’t do
what?”
“Pull away. I felt
the way that you kissed me. You can’t fake something like that.”
She shook her head.
“I just got caught up in the moment.”
“So what’s wrong with
that?” he asked.
“What’s wrong with
that? Michael, maybe that’s all we’re doing, getting caught up in the past.”
“So what would be so
wrong if we did? You said yourself you’re divorced. And I’m not seeing anyone.
So what’s the harm?”
“The harm is…” She hesitated,
not even sure what her argument was going to be.
“Well?”
“I don’t know. But,
it’s getting late. I should be heading back.”
This time she stood
up, not allowing his gentle hold of her hand to keep her still. She put a few
feet of distance between them before turning back to see him. For a moment she
could’ve sworn she saw hurt in his eyes.
“Do you really have
to go?” he asked.
“Yes, I do.”
“Can I least walk you
home?”
“It’s only two
blocks, Michael. I’ll be fine.”
“I’m sure you will.
But we still have wildlife around here. It would make me feel better if I made
sure you made it home safely.”
“I don’t think that’s
such a good idea.”
“Why?”
“Michael, I—”
“Come on, Vick.” He
stood up and closed the distance between them. “I’ll be a total gentleman. Let
me walk you home.”
“Alright.” She
agreed, although begrudgingly.
It wasn’t that he had
done anything wrong, or that she didn’t want to be around him. She didn’t trust
herself. She could easily see being swept away by her feelings of the past and
how good it felt to feel his hands on her and his kiss against her lips. It
would be all too easy to fall under his spell and end up in his bed. She didn’t
want to risk it. Her heart hurt horribly after their break up. Despite all the
time that passed she could see herself feeling that same heartache all over
again.
He picked up the two
mugs and held his arm out in front of him. “After you.”
She started to walk
and he stepped alongside her. The first minute or two neither of them spoke. He
kept in pace with her as she leisurely strolled, but she had a feeling she
might be slowing him down.
“You know Jack
brought a girl home with him,” he offered, breaking the silence that lingered
between them.
“Oh?” She smiled,
genuinely happy to hear the news. She had always liked Jack, Jr. Just not as
much as she liked his little brother. “What’s she like?”
“Her name is Kaylee.
She seems sweet. And she’s spunky, too.”
She laughed. “Well
I’d imagine she’d have to be to be special enough for Jack to bring her
home.”
“Yeah. Mom’s on cloud
nine. You just know she has visions of grandbabies dancing in her head.”
For a single moment
she stilled, but she quickly resumed her pace.
“Wow. Way to go,
jackass,” Michael muttered.
“It’s okay. We agreed
earlier that it was in the past.” She turned to look at her house. “Thank you
for walking me home.”
“That’s it?”
She hated the hurt
she saw reflecting back at her in his eyes. She wanted to believe that he was
the same person she once loved. Maybe her husband’s infidelity affected her
more than she realized. It occurred to her that she wasn’t so willing to give
herself to someone after being discarded so easily. She’d allowed Michael to do
it to her once and it had nearly destroyed her. The opportunity of him being
able to do it again wasn’t something she wanted to chance.
“Thank you for
walking me home, Michael.”
He shook his head,
his gaze fixed on the ground at their feet. She wanted to say something. It
wasn’t like her to be so cold and unfeeling. The sad fact of it was, she was
anything but unfeeling right then. In some way she realized that she’d never
fully gotten over Michael.
She’d learned that a
part of her still belonged to him. The kiss and the way she allowed him in so
easily had proven that. She just wasn’t willing to give up anything more of
herself. It seemed that was all she ever did. She gave herself willingly and
somehow always ended up being left behind. It was a gut wrenching feeling and
one she didn’t wish to revisit ever again. Especially not with Michael.
When he didn’t answer
she attempted to take the mugs from his hands. His fingers wrapped around hers
and he held her there. She stood frozen and unable to move. His touch exuded
such warmth and comfort. It would be so easy to fall into his embrace and forget
her insecurities and fears.